Entertainment

What I Would Want My Girlfriend To Get Me For Valentine’s Day

I call my mujer, “Princess.” She is my queen. My chikibaby. YES LAWD, I LOVE MY WOMAN. She’s my sun, my moon, y el chile verde en mis tacos. Valentine’s Day is coming, and she already knows I’m gonna treat her. 

I’mma take her michelada tasting and we’re gonna drink the finest miches. And when we get home there’ll be rose petals leading up to the bed, which will have a plate con una torta ahogada and two forks. One for me. One for her. 

But, you know what, fam, I’m a little jealous. She deserves ALL the Valentine’s love but you know, sometimes a boy wants to feel like a princess, too. Like, no mames. I know you ladies gotta smell us, and pretend like we’re fine like Diego Luna and all that but it’s 2020 maybe this is the year the boys get to be chiquiados? No se. Piénsalo.

This is my list of things I would like my bae to get me for Valentine’s (a boy can dream).

Chiquear Your Man Gift Idea #1: Amor Eterno Tee

OMG. This shirt is too cute. GET THIS FOR YOUR MANS. Please. This artist is super chingón and has been blowing up all over L.A. Also, this shirt will remind your guy that he is stuck to you now, and always. And if he says, “Pero, baby, we’ve only been dating 8 months…” It’s NOW AND ALWAYS CABRÓN.

Chiquear Your Man Gift Idea #2: Guacardo Loves Pizza Joggers

Going out is for singles. Eso ya no me pertenece. These joggers, mi chikibaby, and the remote is all I need to have a FIRE-ass night. If you love your man — set him free. Let him be comfortable in his pajama and I guarantee this will lead to snuggle action. And who knows where the night might go from there….bow wow chika wow wow????. (Haha nah, I’m kidding. Grow up cochinos.)

Chiquear Your Man Gift Idea #3: San Marcos Fleece Blanket

Here’s my fantasy: I’m shivering on the couch trying to watch “Narcos: Mexico.” Suddenly my bae turns to me (in slow motion) and says, “Quieres que te tape, baybeh?” I’m like, “Si, baybeh. Porfis.” She pulls out this blanket. It has that iconic tigre on it. I’m instantly cozy and calientito like a caldo de pozole. We make out for 47 minutes. The next episode of “Narcos: Mexico” plays and I didn’t catch a damn thing from the previous episode…pero me vale. 

Chiquear Your Man Gift Idea #4: I’m Falling For You Tee

Pobre del Edgar. That dude will always be remembered as the kid who was super scared of falling. But I was never afraid to fall…in love with my girl (you’re looking at that last line like, “YA GUEY….YAAAA GUEEYYYYYY!!!” Okay, okay, okay, SORRY. I had to. But in all seriousness this shirt makes me laugh. If my girl got me this, I would know deep in my heart that she understands me. Trust me, don’t get a man roses (those are a pedorro gifts to us). We want this shirt.

Chiquear Your Man Gift Idea #5: Guacardo Plushie

No mames. Guys pretend they’re too macho to have a pinche monito de Guacardo… until their girl catches them in the middle of hugging Guacardo in their room while they’re scrolling through pictures of enchiladas together on Instagram. If you ask your man if he’d want this and he says no, tell him, “No te hagas, cabrón,” and get it for him anyway. Guacardo is an icon, and if you ever find yourself in an argument with your man, I guarantee you’ll always be able to stop the fight by saying, “Stop yelling in front of our child!” And the moment he looks into Guacardo’s awkward-ass he’ll forget what you were fighting about. And you’ll have a makeup make-out session for 47 minutes.

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UPS Delivery Man Is Fired After Video Surfaces of His Anti-Latino Racist Rant

Things That Matter

UPS Delivery Man Is Fired After Video Surfaces of His Anti-Latino Racist Rant

Photo courtesy Forward Latino

An unnamed UPS delivery driver has been fired after being caught using racist language when delivering a package to a Latino household. The incident occurred on December 17th.

The video, which was caught on a doorbell camera’s security footage, shows a white UPS driver appearing to be angry when delivering a package.

“Now you don’t get f—–g nothing…You can’t read and write and speak the f—–g English language,” he says while writing a “failed to deliver” notice and pasting it on the house’s front door.

The Aviles family says that the footage shows that the UPS worker never even attempted to deliver the package in the first place. He never rang the doorbell or knocked on the door. Based on that, the family has come to the conclusion that the driver intentionally withheld the package from the family out of prejudice and spite

They believe that the only way the driver could’ve known that the family was Latino was by making assumptions based off the name on the package.

“The only information this driver had that could serve as a trigger for this deep-seated hate was the name on the package,” said Forward Latino President Darryl Morin at a press conference addressing the incident.

“So what we have here is a very intentional act to ruin Christmas for somebody, for someone to spew this hateful rhetoric, and quite honestly to deceive their employer,” Morin continued.

Per UPS, the employee has now been fired. “There is no place in any community for racism, bigotry or hate. This is very serious and we promptly took action, terminating the driver’s employment. UPS is wholeheartedly committed to diversity, equity and inclusion,” UPS said in a statement. They also said they contacted the family to apologize.

But the Aviles family is still rattled that such bigoted people are out and about, letting their petty prejudices effect other people’s lives.

“The package was a Christmas gift that we eventually received after Christmas Day, but what if it happened to have time-sensitive content like an epipen or a book I needed to take a final,” said Shirley Aviles, the mother of the man who lives at the address, told NBC News. “I don’t get it. It’s just sad.”

Aviles seemed disturbed about what this incident says about human nature. “This is about the things people do when they think no one is watching them. That’s important because that’s when you see people’s true colors and that’s what’s scary,”

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Here Are Some Christmas Traditions From Around Latin America

Culture

Here Are Some Christmas Traditions From Around Latin America

Henry Sadura / Getty Images

Christmas is a special time of year. Families have their traditions to mark the festive year and some of those traditions are rooted in culture. Here are some of the ways various countries in Latin America celebrate Christmas.

El Pase Del Niño Viajero – Ecuador

El Pase del Niño Viajero is a pageant that happens in Ecuador that lasts weeks. The parade is meant to represent the journey of Mary and Joseph. The parade highlights the religious importance of Christmas in Ecuador and is most common in the Andean region of the country.

The biggest and most important parade is in Cuenca, a deeply religious city. Citizens near the city have all day to see the parade as it starts in the early morning and runs through the late afternoon. This gives people a lot of time to make it to the city to witness the parade.

La Gritería – Nicaragua

La Gritería comes after La Purisma. La Purisma is celebrated at the end of November and is meant to celebrate the Immaculate Conception of the Virgin Mary. La Gritería is celebrated in early December and involves literal yelling. Someone would shout “Que causa tanta alegria?” (“What causes so much happiness?”) People respond “La Concepción de María.” (“Mary’s Conception.”)

Las Posadas – Mexico

Mexican posadas are the most recognizable. Posadas take place in Mexico from Dec. 16-24, though this year they are most likely to be virtual. The posada begins with a procession in the neighborhood filled with people singing and sometimes led by two people dressed as Mary and Joseph.

Another part is the posada party. Before guests can enter, there is a song exchange with the people outside playing Joseph looking for shelter. The hosts sing the side of the innkeeper saying there is no room. Eventually, the guests are welcomed into the home to celebrate Christmas.

Aguinaldos – Colombia

Aguinaldos are a series of games played by people in Colombia leading up to Christmas. There are certain games that are common among people in Colombia. One is pajita en boca, which requires holding a straw in your mouth the entire time of a social event. Another is dar y no recibir, which is about getting people to take something you are giving to score a point.

El Quema Del Diablo – Guatemala

El quema del diablo is celebrated in early December and is a way of letting go of the previous year. People burn piñatas and effigies of the devil to let go of all negative feelings and moments from the previous year. If there was every to try a new tradition, this would be the year. Burn an effigy and banish 2020 to the past, where it belongs.

READ: These Seriously Sad Christmas Presents Were Worse Than Actual Coal

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