Thinking of a first date, a romantic comedy montage might cue up in our minds, sparking joy, nervousness, and even a little hope. Will this person be THE ONE? Where will we go? What will I wear?

But in the 21st century, the dating world progressively becomes more challenging. Let’s face it — first dates are not what they used to be. Blame it on the economy, the pandemic, lack of chivalry, or online dating. But between arguments on who’s paying the bill or getting ghosted, we may be asking: porque es tan cruel el amor?

However, ladies are upping the stakes of the game on places they refuse to be taken to on first dates. In fact, a viral list is going around social media listing 28 different spots that made the cut. As TikTok user Jess Lucero shares, this feels like “every place ever, where are we supposed to go on a first date?”


Viral list of first dates “women refuse to go to” do we agree or disagree with this list?? #firstdates

♬ original sound – Jess Lucero❤️‍🔥☕️

And while we all love Olive Garden’s bottomless breadsticks and salad, apparently these women want no scrubs. Or as one TikTok user shared, “I get where there coming from in some of the low-effort dates. Also, places where you can’t really talk and get to know one another.”

While we still find some of these a bit excessive (we’re still totally down for ice cream and coffee dates), we’re breaking down our top nine spots women DEFINITELY don’t want to go to on a first date.

1. The Gym

As much as getting in shape and following an active lifestyle is trending, the gym is a definite no-no. Sweat and body odor aside, the gym is hardly a quiet place to chat or talk to someone. Also, what if you don’t have a gym membership?

One X user pointed out that if we’re already struggling to go to the gym by ourselves, we’re definitely not making it out there on a first date.

2. Your House

While places on the list such as the movies still baffle us, your house is DEFINITELY not happening. Aside from giving off serial killer vibes, a first date is not the time for “your house or mine.” As this X user pointed out, “you could be an [axe] murderer.”

3. At-home Movie Night (Hulu, Netflix, and etc)

“Netflix and Chill” is getting a hard “no” when it comes to a first date. Right up there with going to someone’s house.

4. Somewhere that requires a long drive

For women, safety comes first. Picking places that are accessible and easy to get to is a must, especially when going on a blind date or with someone you’ve met online. Also, the way gas prices are these days, let’s keep it in the radius.

5. Red Lobster

While Beyoncé says “When he f*** me good I take his a** to Red Lobster, ’cause I slay,” the restaurant chain made it on the list. And yes, the cheese biscuits may slay, but as many commented on the Instagram post, they’re staying away from the mess.

6. Chipotle

If you’re looking to impress, especially a Latina, Chipotle is not the place to go. Beans on teeth, a potential rush to the bathroom, and low-budget/effort ranking as the top reasons to scratch it out.

7. A Buffet

In line with the low budget and effort options, keeping germs at bay sounds like a good idea.

8. Church

While C. Tangana may have popularized dancing bachata at church — and let’s face it — we’d rather know if our date is really a diablito, we’ll skip church for a first date.

For the sake of confession though, we’re right in line with this X user:

Perhaps we can leave the limpia for a second date?

9. Family Functions

Finally, we’ve left the best for last. As much as many women want to meet their partner’s mamás and abuelitas, let’s save it for the 10th date, not the 15th. Plus, we all know their tía’s going to run a deeper investigation on you than the FBI.

As to how this made it to the list, we’re all still wondering the same thing: