Dad Opens Up Debate About Chore System: ‘One Son Has To Do More Chores Than The Other’
A controversial new Reddit thread on the AITA (Am I the Asshole) subreddit is sparking a conversation about dividing chores between two kids, especially when one is more social than the other. Every parent with more than one child knows what it’s like to divide chores equally between them. But this dad’s choice seems…a bit unfair.
The thread, titled “AITA because one son has to do more chores than the other?” is sparking quite the debate.
Should one kid have to do more chores than the other?
The OP explains that they have two children, aged 12 and 14. Each is responsible for sweeping their rooms and taking out the garbage. They also alternate cleaning the bathroom. However, if they have friends over, they’re off the hook for that day.
“It’s kind of awkward for the other kid to just have to sit around and twiddle their thumbs while their host is swiffering,” the poster writes. The problem isn’t so much about having friends over, but the fact that one kid has friends over more often than the other.
“My 14yo gets pissed when the 12yo is at a friend’s house or has a friend over and doesn’t have to do his chores because it isn’t fair,” the poster writes. They also explain how the 14-year-old doesn’t have friends over and is not very social. “I don’t think this is a healthy mindset from him, but he’s been getting angrier and angrier,” they write.
Things came to a head a day before the post made its way to Reddit. The 14-year-old finally put his foot down and refused to do his chores “because 12 had a friend over to work on a project with,” according to the poster. Instead of discussing the kid’s frustrations, the poster grounded them.
Reddit commenters are calling this dad out for picking favorites
The thread resolved itself pretty quickly.
See, when AITA posts blow up on Reddit, the mods label them “Asshole” or “Not the A-hole” depending on the response. Commenters hit OP with the former pretty quickly.
“If one gets out of it all the time, it is unfair,” the top comment read. “When the 12 yo has a friend over then they should get an extra day assigned to them during the week. Don’t punish the 14yo for not being as social.”
Responses to that comment only reinforced what the original commenter was saying about this dad.
“Obvious who is the favourite child here,” one Reddit commenter replied. “Also obvious the subliminal message — ‘If you want less chores, try to be more like your brother, who is sooo social and awesome omg,'” another wrote. Some commenters even pointed out the fact that their parents made them do chores before friends came over.
Others mentioned that the system itself actively punishes the older child for not having as many friends. “You set up a system that clearly favors your more social child,” a commenter wrote, “and continued to use it after it became clear it was unfair.” They added, “Also, how dirty is your house that you have to clean every day?”
Elsewhere, someone said that there’s actually a teachable moment here about time management. “Let them each pick a day each week to skip chores rather than basing it on when they have friends over or other plans. It’s a valuable mini-lesson in budgeting time for responsibilities,” they wrote.
In fact, going through the comments, not a single person wrote NTA (Not the Asshole). The decision here is pretty unanimous. This dad needs to make some changes to the chore chart. Soon. Check out the full Reddit thread here!
Notice any corrections needed? Please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org