Women Share The Names Of Women That Get Overlooked Despite Their Major Contributions To Society

Over the weekend, American politician Kamala Harris became the first African American, the first Asian American, the first Caribbean American, and the first woman to hold the title of vice president-elect of the United States. At the time of her acceptance speech, Harris credited her accomplishments to the many women who came before her saying “I stand on their shoulders… And what a testament it is to Joe’s character that he had the audacity to break one of the most substantial barriers that exists in our country and select a woman as his vice president.”

Of course, it didn’t take long for women to shout the names of these giants whose shoulders she stood on. In a post shared to Reddit, one user asked “who are some women that often get overlooked in history but had major contributions to society?”

The responses to the question came in the thousands.

Check out the answer below!

“Virginia Hall has a building named after her at the CIA. She was an American woman from Baltimore who went to Europe in the 1930s, lost her leg in a shooting accident, then proceeded to become a leader in the French Resistance and master of disguise, all with a wooden leg. The book A Woman of No Importance is about her and came out last year.” –Muchamuchacha42

“Anna Connelly invented the fire escape in 1887.

That same year, Josephine Cochrane invented the dishwasher.” –fergi20020

“Inge Lehmann was a Danish seismologist. She discovered P’ waves (waves that reflect off of the inner-core), confirming that the earth has a solid inner-core and a liquid outer-core.” –Occams_l2azor

“Yes, was just about to comment her as well. It’s shocking she’s not more well known.” –EmulsionPast

“Dr. Mona Hanna-Attisha.

She is the Dean of Medicine at Hurley Children’s Hospital in Flint, MI. She saw that children were having elevated lead levels (ELLs) outside the normal range. She contacted the Genesee Department of Health, who at first, dismissed her claim, then sent her obfuscated data to make it look like the ELLs were completely within normal trends.

She grew frustrated at this, so she called a team of epidemiologists from UVA (her alma mater) to find the source of the lead. Lo and behold, she found that the water in multiple zip codes was contaminated with lead. She informed the Genesee Department of Health Again, who brushed her off. She then said “fuck it” and held a major press conference where she announced on air that the water in Flint wasn’t safe and to come to the hospital to get your child tested and to pick up supplies of water and liquid infant formula.

If she saved thousands of children from the permanent effects of lead poisoning.

Edit 1: thanks for the awards

Edit 2: It was VT, not UVA. Apologies to all the VT alumnae who DM’d me about it.” –MadameBurner

“I was just reading about her yesterday!

She’s also helped design ways to assist parents who have children with lead poisoning as well.” –Special-Kwest

“I’ve met her! She works really closely with my alma mater (Michigan State). A truly fantastic human. And as if this wasn’t enough, back in March she had COVID and after she recovered began donating blood as often as she could so they could use it in antibody and vaccine research!” –escapestrategy

“That’s awesome. And a great lesson that when you’ve researched and you know something is wrong, stick to your guns.” –Yerwun

“She wrote a book called What The Eyes Don’t See, it’s a pretty good read.” –qwryzu

“It was actually a Virginia Tech team that came and found the source.” –joshtm27

“Marie Tharp; she created the first map of the ocean floor, which led to the discovery of tectonic plates, and the theory of continental drift.” –PhantomKitten73

“That doesn’t seem like a lot on the surface, but that really had major impacts on our society.” –MrMan306

“Damnit wegener not as cool as we thought!” –Thundergun7276

Lead to acceptance of the theory of continental drift: the theory existed well beforehand, though it wasn’t widely supported or believed at first due to lacking evidence.

“Dr. Georgeanna Seeger Jones

Dr. Jones singlehandedly organized the field of Gynecological Endocrinology. While at John’s Hopkins with her husband, Dr. Howard Jones and Drs. Roberts and Steptoe, she devised the hypothesis of follicular hyper stimulation, which produced more than one egg per cycle. Her later discoveries led to increases in viability of In Vitro Fertilization.

Per Wikipedia : As a resident at Johns Hopkins, she discovered that the pregnancy hormone hCG was manufactured by the placenta, not the pituitary gland as originally thought. This discovery led to the development of many of the early over-the-counter pregnancy test kits currently available. On 1949, Jones made the first description of Luteal Phase Dysfunction and is credited to be the first in using progesterone to treat women with a history of miscarriages, thus allowing many of them to not only conceive, but to deliver healthy babies

She also served as a Dean of the College of Pontifical Sciences, advising the Vatican of matters of Gynecology and Conception.

Her husband always said “She’s the smarter one.”

She was also a great friend.” –Fyrepup

“Huh. So she’s the one to thank that I even exist.” –theswamphag

“I don’t know why but the fact you wrote she was a great friend suddenly brought tears to my eyes. Reading about all these inspiring women who have done such selfless and incredible things for the world and for someone to acknowledge her as an intimate person, a human being, as well- that was beautiful. Thank you for adding it!” –mistysfrosted

“A great friend of yours? Did you know her?

If so that’s fabulous, I’m glad you’re promoting her memory.” –Indigoes

“Thank you Doctor Jones. Without your contributions I would not have a son snoring in the other room.” –mullingthingsover

“Sandra Ford, the drug technician who first brought attention to what would become the AIDS epidemic. She knew something was up when she began receiving unusually high numbers of requests for pentamidine, an antibiotic reserved for treating pneumocystis pneumonia in seriously ill, immuno-compromised patients. The patients it was being requested for were gay men who had been otherwise healthy.” –scottstot8543

“Oh and also back then it was called grid not aids it stood for gay related immunodeficiency whereas aids stands for acquired immunodeficiency syndrome. The more you know.” –eliteaimzONTWITCH

“In a similar vein, Gao Yaojie is an elderly doctor who brought attention to the AIDS pandemic ravaging China’s Henan province in the 90s. She was one of the earliest doctors in China to raise awareness and do public education on AIDS

Instead of being hailed as a hero, she was harassed and silenced by the local authorities who tried to cover up the pandemic (they encouraged blood-selling as a way to lift villages out of poverty, which, with unsanitized equipment, gave rise to the pandemic).” –demsyay

“Frances Oldham Kelley. She stopped thalidomide from getting widespread use in North America, and saved countless children from life-altering birth defects.” –stillpacing

“Thalidomide is a great example to explain the importance of stereochemistry.” –samba_01

“The Allied codebreakers at places like Bletchley Park during WWII. They worked incredibly long, tedious, and stressful hours and were a major contributor to the war effort and military intelligence, but their work didn’t even receive official recognition from the British government until 2009, 64 years after the war ended.”- TheSorge

“Elizabeth Friedman was a huge part of the American side of the code breaking. Her and her husband were originally tasked with training a lot of the first code breakers to fight the mafia during Prohibition. Her husband was set up with official government business during the war and she was given an office of people to train. They often worked with the Bletchly Park people.”- iwannaridearaptor

“I just want to add the unfortunate treatment that Alan Turing received also. At the time, being homosexual was a criminal offence, he was caught and sentenced to chemical castration. Government didn’t stop it, even though we’d be Nazis without him.”- parabolicurve

“In 1952 Dr. Virginia Apgar developed a quick, easy five-point test that summarizes health of newborns, and determine those needing emergency assistance. The Apgar Score is now given to practically every newborn, and helped save countless young lives, and reduce infant mortality.”- anthropology_nerd

“fun fact: i edited her wikipedia page to include her cause of death. i was in a summer program about women’s history and one morning we were asked to edit a famous woman’s wiki page to contribute to more accurate and full info about their lives because that’s not a thing that many people are invested in. so if you get to the part where she died of cirrhosis, that was me.” –curlsandpearls33

“Claudette Colvin was the person who refused to get up from her bus seat during the Jim Crows in America. But she was a young woman who was pregnant out of wedlock at the time, and the black leaders decided she was not a good image of an activist. So they handpicked Rosa Parks to do the same.”-  GovMajor

“Elsie MacGill aka “queen of the hurricanes”, she was the worlds first female to earn aeronautical engineering degree. The two major things she did was, she designed the Maple Leaf Trainer ll and she was to look over manufacturing operations at a Canadian factories that built the Hawker Hurricane.” –RedNeckCrazy0_1

“Bessie Coleman. She was a black woman who wanted to learn to fly. No one would teach her. She learned that the French would however, so she moved to France, learned French and how to fly. Then she came back to the states and taught whoever wanted to learn. She was alive same time as Amelia Earhart and got no recognition at the time.”- daschle04

“I was going to put her Im glad someone did. She was a huge part of African Americans getting into flight she played not only a role for females but for African Americans during the early days of aviation, to be able to fly and get into the aviation field.” –Terry_D_

“The main road that runs through the middle of O’Hare Airport is called Bessie Coleman Drive.” –rckid13

“Historical university sexism is a topic often brushed under the rug these days. IIRC the only reason King’s College London exists is because the King was mad that University College London admitted women students and so set up a rival uni that didn’t.” –Danhuangmao

“Cheng I Sao/ Ching Shih was the single most sucessful pirate in all of history. She led an armada of tens of thousands of sailors and 17 seperate fleets of ships and held the most important tributary in china under raiding for weeks on end before managing to give the slip to a combined force of portuguese, chinese, and English war ships after being cornered in an inlet with 2 wounded ships and no way out but through. After this venture, she recognized that her power was begining to wane so she decided it was better to cash out while she had the leverage (one of her fleets had turned on her during the period among other things) She managed to negotiate for literally all of her men to be given amnesty, be allowed to join the chinese navy, to keep the stuff they had stolen, and for her to be able to keep several ships to be able to have a buisness in the salt trade. She then ran a gambling house and died peacefully in her sleep.

Besides a fucking kickass story, she has also had some lasting consequences. Her absolute domination over the chinese navy showed just how much the empire had neglected that wing of the military, and the British picked up on this. It was a big part of why they were so willing to fight a naval war across the entire planet at a time when even messages would take a year and change just to make it back. The opium wars were fought because of this, and the treaties that resulted are called by the current chinese government as the start of “the century of shame” and are a major touchstone in the governments image of itself. They are invoked today when negotiations with the west breakdown as a reason that China ought not bow to outside pressure. For any canadians (of which I am) , its on the level of Vimy ridge in our national conception.” –Dovahkiin419

“One of the things I love about her story is that she would simply execute or punish the men in her crew if they were to rape or wed a female captive without their permission. I think it came from her past of being a sex worker that led to her having that rule.”- overstuffeddumpling

I learned about her at mini golf, of all fucking places. Always wanted to see a movie, series or book about her life.

“Cecilia Payne, discovered what universe is made out of… And don’t even get a mention in textbooks.” –neitral-fella

“My old astrophysics professor actually worked with her, and said it was something to behold her ability to look at plates, and tell you so much about the star.

Edit: He was quite old when I had him as a prof, and to give you an idea how old I am, I didn’t even think about the fact that people wouldn’t know what an astronomical plate is.” –futureformerteacher

“Also vera ruben had a major contribution to the field and was effectively shit canned because she was a woman. Her credit went to others as a result.” –waxy1234

“King Tamara of Georgia. She now represents the Georgian nation in Civilization VI, but before that, not a lot of people knew about her. And whenever she is mentioned, she is mentioned as queen, but she was given the title of KING because she was recognized as an equal monarch (her husbands didn’t have any royal titles). This is an undisputed fact in Georgian historiography, IDK about western scholars, but whenever she is mentioned on the internet or mainstream, would it be Wikipedia or a video game, like CIV VI, she is denied her lawful title and that just pisses me off!” –Sabunia

“Carol KayeCarol Kaye, the First Lady of bass playing. She played over 10,000 sessions, including albums from Frank Sinatra, Beach Boys, Stevie Wonder, and the Monkees. I can thank the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and the subreddit for educating me about her.” –Cerrida82

“Belva Lockwood – one of the first female lawyers in the US and ran for president in the 1880s.” –dangerphilosophical

“The two linked videos can tell the story better than I can but Mary Anning is the person from English history I Most admire. A self-taught common woman Mary Anning in the 1800s collected and sold fossils to wealthy patrons. She was an expert in the preparation of fossils. The structure of Society at the time prevented her from contributing more to the emerging field of palaeontology. She died from breast cancer in her 40s. After her bank collapsed wiping out her savings, and the enthusiasm for fossils by the wealthy was dampened by an economic downturn as well as the fad fading. She taught herself anatomy from the Books she was able to come by and by comparing the fossils she unearthed to those of modern sea life she dissected on her kitchen table. She was often right about what categories of life the fossils she presented to the world when many of the “gentlemen scholars” argued over whether something was a fish or a bird or a reptile. In her last years, the men who had so often claimed her discoveries as their own and refused her admission into their exclusive Geological Society of London supported her in some small ways. They raised the funds for a pension she could live on. After she died the Society honoured her with a eulogy and donated a stained glass window to her church.

More than the 1000th documentary on a Queen of England I wish she was more covered by popular media. I have little hope for the upcoming film that does not seem like it will emphasis the parts of her life that I am interested in. Her Life is downright tragic at the end as she is crushed by circumstances beyond her control. From all, I am able to learn she was driven, entrepreneurial, smart, and prudent. But all the came undone because she lived in a time without anything like the FDIC or access to cancer treatment.” –Primarch459

“Daphne Oram – first ever composer to produce electronic sound. She pioneered electronic music and lead the path for music today. She even wrote a piece called “Still Point” that she was never able to perform live because of sexism by her peers and she never heard it live before she died. But it was performed for the first time in 2018 using a replica of a machine Daphne had created to electronically manipulate a live orchestra.” –thatgreengentleman92

“Cecily Saunders deserves the reputation Mother Tereasa has. She basically invented hospice care. Before her, doctors used to just abandon incurables to die with no palliative care.

Cecily Saunders arguably eliminated more useless suffering than anyone ever.” –DrainageSpanial

“Henrietta Lacks. She saved millions of lives and made a critical contribution to the world of medicine, but unless you’re in the medical field — you’ve probably never even heard her name. Henrietta Lacks was a young, black, mother of five when she died in 1951 after being diagnosed with an aggressive cervical cancer at Johns Hopkins. Doctor George Gey was working at Hopkins at the time, trying to culture cells in the laboratory. Lacks’ cells were among dozens sent to his lab, but they were the first to ever survive and grow. Her cells, a unique and aggressive type, were later described as one in three billion. Scientists called these resilient cells “HeLa” — taking first two letters of “Henrietta” and “Lacks.” HeLa cells were used to test the polio vaccine, develop in vitro fertilization, and several chemotherapy drugs among hundreds of medical advances. Grown and sold around the world, Lacks’ legacy lived on in her cells: they have traveled to space, they have been embedded in a nuclear bomb. But for decades, the Lacks family had no idea.” –suckerforsucculents

“Mary Todd Lincoln. I know she went absolutely mad, which wasn’t all her fault, but she was the one who really pushed her husband (Abraham Lincoln for those not from America) to keep moving up the political ladder, and ultimately shaped what the first lady of the U.S is. Not sure he would have become president without her influence. She had a lot more ambition than he did.” –Klaudiapotter

Sister Rosetta Tharpe

She was super influencial to early rock musicians like Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Elvis Presley, Jerry Lee Lewis and so many more. Johnny Cash even said that she was his favorite singer and she was also one of the first to play around with heavy distortion on her electric guitar. She’s called by some “The Godmother of Rock and Roll” but I guarantee you that the average person has never heard of her.

Edit: Here’s a cool compilation of some of her guitar solos from films so you can see how much she rocks” –-eDgAR-

“Edith Wilson. After President Woodrow Wilson had a stroke, she effectively ran the executive branch for the rest of his second term (” –kernel_dev

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A Black Teen Earned Over $1 Million In Scholarships From 18 Colleges That Accepted Her


A Black Teen Earned Over $1 Million In Scholarships From 18 Colleges That Accepted Her

Joe Sohm/Visions of America / Getty

Shanya Robinson-Owens applied to over 20 colleges and has been accepted into 18 of them.

As if that wasn’t impressive enough, the high school senior has also been offered more than $1 million in scholarship money. The 17-year-old Philadelphia teen currently attends George Washington Carver High School of Engineering and Science but is headed towards a pretty bright and educated future.

According to a recent interview with “Good Morning America” the star student earned $1,074,260 in scholarships.

“We are overjoyed,” Robinson-Owens aunt told the show in a recent interview. “I knew she wouldn’t have a problem getting into colleges, but we didn’t know they would award her this much money in scholarship funds.”

Shanya, who was accepted to Moravian College in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania; La Salle University in Philadelphia; Lincoln University in Jefferson City, Missouri; Temple University in Philadelphia and Cabrini University in Radnor, Pennsylvania, told GMA that she “wasn’t really expecting it” so many offers let alone so much money.

The senior currently holds a 3.2-grade point average and is a member of the school’s yearbook committee. She also works as an intern alongside her Chinese language teacher.

When it comes to the advice she’d give other students, Shayna says it’s important to “take your time” with your work and the application process.

“You really have to be patient,” Shanya explained. “Stay focused. If you need to have some time away, it’s OK. You can tell your teachers that because they know you’re stressed.”

“We’ve always been extremely proud of her,” Shanya’s aunt, Christine Owens, explained to GMA. “My mother has helped raise Shanya since she was a baby. We’ve just been working as a team making sure Shanya keeps God first in anything she does and she is succeeding.”

Speaking about Shanya, her school principal Ted Domers told GMA that Shanya is a “well-respected student at her school.”

“In addition to being a part of a movement to bring more social action to our school, she’s involved in a number of extracurricular activities that show the breadth of her skills, from robotics to journalism,” Domers explained. “It is a privilege for us to count Shanya as one of our own and we are excited to see her create opportunities for her future.”

Shanya has yet to make a college pick.

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Women Are Giving People In Their 20s Advice On How To Get Their Derailed Lives Back On Track


Women Are Giving People In Their 20s Advice On How To Get Their Derailed Lives Back On Track

Warner Bros. Pictures

If there’s one thing that your twenties will most definitely teach you, it’s that life is filled to the brim with ups and downs, highs and lows. More often than we’d like, in our lives we find ourselves digging ourselves out of the holes we’ve created for ourselves (be it personal, financial, or career-related). Fortunately, so much of our twenties are about building up our strength so that we can conquer the downs and lows of our lives.

Recently, women on Reddit got together and shared their tips for how to get back on track.

Check out some of the best bits of advice, below!

“Gain some perspective. Take a step back from any social media that you’re engrossed with. I’m not saying you are, but lots of us are so overly engaged with the media we consume it can become harmful to our own self-esteem. Focus on what you want to achieve in the short and medium term for yourself and appreciating the steps you take towards those goals. Focus on the short term. If this last year has taught us anything it’s that you can’t plan too far ahead.” –MillieGouLightly

“Yes, make short term goals that are attainable. Also shoot for a long term one, too. I was like this. I was letting life lead me. Then I took action and things improved. Anot her thing to note: the human brain doesn’t fully mature until around age 26. Cut yourself some slack.” –EddieAllenPoe

“Could not agree more on the social media part. I’m just in the stage of realising that mindless browsing could have so much affect on how we perceive ourself, which is why I’ve been taking detox days where I don’t check FB or Instagram and I must say I feel so much better by adopting a more realistic perspective on life. I would only use social media to do research on things that interest me, reading the news, getting advice on reddit and thats about it. I also try to read as much as I can because it gives me new ideas and its a mental exercise.” –SilkEmpire

Kind of related to the whole “people pleaser” thing, I really struggle with not putting so much stock in other people’s opinions (that I don’t necessarily agree with). For example, once you’re in your mid 20s, people on Reddit comment that “30 is around the corner” for you or that you’re “almost 30”. And when I point out how I don’t think that’s true (like you’re not “almost” any age til the very late part of that decade imo), I still see a couple of people coming in and go all, “well AKSHUALLY it’s technically true” (umm okay? but even if you think 5 years goes fast, it is still a substantial amount of time). Idk…but seeing comments like these makes me feel like I’m getting my time taken away from me. It feels like they trying to force you to feel older than you really are, or it’s almost like they are wishing away your time (cuz I notice it’s usually older people that make these comments). I find it pretty cruel to do, as I see no point in saying things like this to someone unless you wanna pressure them to conform to your timeline or make them feel bad.” –wahwahwhatodoooo

“How did you do this? I have realized for some years now that I have become a complete people pleaser, but I just can’t stop. It’s not that I don’t want to continue to be nice to people, but I do want to be able to communicate and enforce my boundaries. Also beeing a people pleaser makes me a boring and undefined character. So any tips on how to deconstruct this behaviour are appreciated.” –Vegetable_Scholar_11

“What if you are torn between doing something and not doing it? I want to quit my job so I can focus fully on school and myself, but I’m also worried it will harm me in the future even if it’s what I want and need right now. Do you just go with your gut and do what you feel like doing? Or do you consider how making that decision will affect you in the future, too? Especially if you burn bridges with the people you didn’t want to please and then it comes back to bite you.” –naanbud

“By realizing that not having the stereotypical “dream job isn’t everything” – as another commenter said, I realized how the income I do get, even if it’s not what I need or in a field that I find terribly interesting, allows me to pursue hobbies and interests on the weekends or in free time.

I also thought back ten years ago to my teens, and thought how worried I was then and, things worked out. I find that comforting that in another ten years, I’ll probably feel the same about doubts I have now.” –70378939272586Aa

“The career I wanted at 21 is not the same career I have or want at 32, or even 26. I’m with the same company I started with at 21, but since then have joined a department I didn’t even know existed when getting my college degree.” –jcollins88

“Yes this 100%. I try not to sink further in depression because the only jobs that will hire me are retail and food service but I’m working on pumping up my portfolio to get an art job. It seems like a long shot especially because the industry I’m trying to break into is competitive but I know my skills have improved a lot since college and I’m working on a bunch of new portfolio projects this year so hopefully that might land me a test or someone to notice me and maybe take a chance on me.”- carissadraws

“I thought this would be enough, but my boss called me this morning and I had to go home from the weekend I had planned to fix something (that was my fault, but I submitted it weeks ago without anyone complaining). I’d rather have a low stress job with reasonable hours and something im passionate about than a high-paying job with a corporate culture that sucks the life out of me.” –one_soup_snake

“Just a note of encouragement. Even though you may feel like you have zero achievements, I know a lot of very “successful” people in their 20s who feel just as lost. I think it’s just part of growing up and doesn’t have to do with what you’ve accomplished. Your achievements might not look like what society defines them as but I think that’s what your 20s is about. Realizing what others have previously told you is valuable, maybe isn’t, and not letting those things define you.” –HappyPuff-02

“I know the feeling, but in time you will realize how freaking young 22 is. Society tells us there is a prescribed path of milestones we have to follow to be successful, and that’s totally not true. I fucked around in college for too long and graduated way after my friends, and at the time it felt shitty. After finally graduating, I bartended for years. Just two months ago, I got a real job in my field and things feel like they are on track. Most of my friends have been in their careers for years. And that’s okay! Don’t let cultural timelines make you feel less than. Just take things a day at a time and try to map out what your own personal goals are. Good luck.”- PleasantRequest

“I was married in my 20s so that was a huge fucking waste of time. I left at 29 and began living the life I had hoped to live with him. I travelled, went to museums, hiking, etc. I just did it all. Then I found someone who loved doing those things as much as I did. Now we share this wanderlust together and even future dreams together. We’re having our first baby in august. It’s just another huge adventure and I wouldn’t want to share the journey with anyone else.” –TakethThyKnee

“First, it’s totally natural. Most people go through some sort of identity crisis in their mid 20s and it was very uncomfortable for me. You thought you knew how everything was going to play out and then you get to a point in your life that does not resemble what you were planning. That’s okay! I was mostly concerned about my career so I took a strength finders quiz that confirmed that I was in the right kind of job for me so then it was finding my space in that area. I looked at what I was doing in my life and what was actually making me happy and excited and what was a chore. This proved very hard cause I found joy in few things. (A few years later, I was diagnosed with anxiety, depression and ADHD) It also was surprising cause I always thought I wanted to manage people and be the ever-sales person but turns out, I don’t enjoy most people and superficial relationships really bother me. So I pivoted toward what I do enjoy and that caused me to get a new job. It also caused me to evaluate my relationship and living situation. Obviously, it took time for leases to end to get my own place without roomies. My relationship I really tried to salvage and eventually it came to a breaking point. Though I’m single today, I’m much happier than I was then and that’s more important to me. (Also I make significantly more money cause it’s a lot easier to work hard at something you like to do) TL;DR – it’s okay, it happens to most people. Start evaluating what truly makes you happy, what you are good at and start making moves towards that. Results may seem much less exciting than what you thought your life would be but happiness is more important than razzle dazzle.” –youvegotmail90

“I really struggle with not putting so much stock in other people’s opinions (that I don’t necessarily agree with). For example, once you’re in your mid 20s, people on Reddit comment that “30 is around the corner” for you or that you’re “almost 30”. And when I point out how I don’t think that’s true (like you’re not “almost” any age til the very late part of that decade imo), I still see a couple of people coming in and go all, “well AKSHUALLY it’s technically true” (okay? but even if you think 5 years goes fast, it is still a substantial amount of time). Idk…but seeing comments like these makes me feel like I’m getting my time taken away from me. It feels like they trying to force you to feel older than you really are, or it’s almost like they are wishing away your time (cuz I notice it’s usually older people that make these comments). I find it pretty cruel to do, as I see no point in saying things like this to someone unless you wanna pressure them to conform to your timeline or make them feel bad.” –wahwahwhatodoooo

“What you said about you changing your job because you realised it didn’t actually feel right for you is really interesting! How did you become so conscious about what you really enjoy/not enjoy doing in your job? And how did you overcome the doubt that maybe changing jobs is the wrong thing to do? Sometimes I find out things about my self but then I doubt it and just think that I’m probably wrong.” –LaneJones2

“Lotssss of self love – Reminding myself that there is nothing that I NEED to have accomplished by now, and that the things I’m comparing myself to in my friends and peers are not actually the things that I strive towards. Remind myself that the latter half of my 20s and into my 30s will be so much more wise, responsible, financially stable and opportunistic. Started taking my mental health seriously, and am now I’m active treatment. Started FINALLY using social media to connect with my friends, rather than deleting/criticizing Instagram when I become overwhelmed by how much of a highlight reel it was. Also unfollowing/muting people who do not serve me online!!! (Huge). !!!Doing inner child work!!! Moved cities – luckily I was able to but not everyone is. Actively repairing relationships I’ve been avoiding for years. Started giving myself permission to sleep longer, got control of my substance misuse, and left two jobs I despised. Started setting boundaries with men to improve my self worth. Started seeking the advice of women who have powerful, intersectional, well rounded perspectives. Started truly embracing my femininity and working on my internalized misogyny. Became passionate about leftist politics. Started exploring my upbringing to see where I have room to grow from what my family taught me growing up. Started actually setting financial goals (credit score, savings acc), made a plan to go back to school, learned how to start asking for help and advice when my ego normally would’ve got in the way.

When I get overwhelmed by how daunting life is and how exhausting it is to feel so lost, I remember how many cities I can go be completely anonymous in. So many oceans to stick your feet in. So many beautiful faces to see all over the world – this gives me perspective and makes me want to continue pushing through this tough world.

I’m pulling myself out of a 3 year rut, and it’s not easy at all nor is it linear. It’s a lot of discomfort and doing things that might make you feel mean or boring, but it’s true acts of self love. It is incredibly humbling. Connect with people and learn their stories. Eat colourful food and start asking about other people’s lives instead of focusing so much on introspection (not suggesting you do, but I am constantly stuck in my own head).” –Catqueen45

“I’m 43 now and I feel like in the past year (lol my 2020 came with an extra plot twist), I am finally becoming the person I wanted to be. I still have a long way to go.

I wish that I figured it out sooner. But it is what it is.

So my advice:

  • if you are in a hole, stop digging. You may not know what else to do but stopping doing things that aren’t working/or are hurtful to yourself is a huge win
  • learn to trust yourself
  • you learn self-love by becoming more of producer rather than a consumer (producing : art, writing, learning, making stuff like cooking or knitting, experiences like hiking, meeting people and really connecting with them. Consuming : tv, social media, etc) it is not to say consumption is bad but too much isn’t going to move you in the right direction
  • it Is ok to change your mind
  • it is ok to make mistakes and fail : success isn’t about how high you go, but how high you bounce back after you fall
  • take care of your mind and body. In your 20s you can take a lot of punishment with lack of sleep, awful food, too much booze, not enough exercise etc. but blowing off self care will not help in the long run
  • figure out your values. This is morbid but it can help – imagine people taking about you once you’ve died. What do you wish they would say? That you were had hard working? Kind? Funny? Whatever it is try to be those things a little but every day.
  • the world never goes away, you can hide from the world, but it will always take you back when you are ready” –Coraline1599 

“I really struggle with not putting so much stock in other people’s opinions (that I don’t necessarily agree with). For example, once you’re in your mid 20s, people on Reddit comment that “30 is around the corner” for you or that you’re “almost 30”. And when I point out how I don’t think that’s true (like you’re not “almost” any age til the very late part of that decade imo), I still see a couple of people coming in and go all, “well AKSHUALLY it’s technically true” (okay? but even if you think 5 years goes fast, it is still a substantial amount of time). Idk…but seeing comments like these makes me feel like I’m getting my time taken away from me. It feels like they trying to force you to feel older than you really are, or it’s almost like they are wishing away your time (cuz I notice it’s usually older people that make these comments). I find it pretty cruel to do, as I see no point in saying things like this to someone unless you wanna pressure them to conform to your timeline or make them feel bad.” –wahwahwhatodoooo

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