Men Are Sharing The Secrets Behind What Made Them Want To Commit

So, you’ve been dating your man for some time and you’re head-over-heels in love. You’re committed, you’re ready to start your life together, and you know that you want to get married. And yet… your love hasn’t asked you to marry him yet.

Fortunately, users on Reddit have questions and answers.

Below, check out what has made these Reddit users committed men.

“I believe I’ve always just been a committed man. Even when I was younger, single and casually seeing people. I never “crossed streams”. I’ve always felt (again, even casual dating) the person I was spending time with deserved (or was worth) my attention and respect. When I got married – the things I always thought/felt just became concrete. 22 years married (this month) and 24 years together.” –oldhead

“I guess it’s all about perspective and doing what we are comfortable with.

Wow, congratulations.”- dododoo214

“Most people don’t try new things. Most people don’t have the courage to live outside their own comfort zone for any appreciable length of time

I think thats the key to a relationship, continuous adventure, stagnation will kill romance and attraction and being in love. Thats why its important to find someone you;re compatible with, that has that same outlook on life. Some guys are just as you said some girls are, they paint themselves into a box and don’t leave. An avid rock climber might have a hard time staying in a long term relationship with a homebody. usually traveling and seeing the world can be all you need, but not everyone has the $$ or the discipline to save the $$ to go.”- Reddit User

“Strange. I’ve had moments where I figure all that out in the first hour of the first date (some people really don’t have a lot going on in there). But seriously, a relationship only lasts if the two of you can grow together.” –pridejoker 

“I’ve been con-committal, but never strung women along. I was always honest about the degree of a commitment I was interested in.

Currently committed. What changed? Me and her. We took our time, matched well, communicate well, and slowly stepped it up as it felt natural. No big deal.”- Reddit User

10

“I met someone who was worth sticking with. For a big chunk of my 20s I’d just choose the easy path when dating. If someone was willing to sleep with me and we had a few mutual interests then I was fine with her being my girlfriend for a while. Eventually we’d break up, I’d find the next woman on OKC who was willing to bang and the cycle would repeat itself. I don’t regret any of this by the way. I’ve never wanted kids and marriage wasn’t really a life goal of mine so dating someone who I knew wasn’t a long-term keeper didn’t bother me. I did fuck up a relationship with one woman that I profoundly regretted though. When I met my now-wife I realized that if I lost her I would probably be kicking myself for years/the rest of my life.”- LOLer_coaster

“When I met my now-wife I realized that if I lost her I would probably be kicking myself for years/the rest of my life.” –dododoo214

“I would be committed for the right girl. If it’s not the right girl I wouldn’t say I string her along as I tell her early on I’m not looking for a relationship. Beyond just ending things out of the blue it’s typically because I found out something about her I didn’t like.”- BowsNToes21

“I’m anti-commitment now, but like I said to another post a few days ago that asked a similar question, I’ll commit when something that blows my socks off comes into my life. Otherwise just keep catching fish and throwing them back.”- OskeewowwowIL

“Totally have strung women along before and been non-committal. With my wife, after we lived together (before we got married) for a couple of years I realized that she was growing and changing as a person just like I was, and that I liked the people we were becoming just as much as I liked how we interacted and who we are as a couple. I like how we solve problems and handle conflict and I like doing cool shit with her and just hanging out at home and joking around or playing board games or watching TV. Basically, when I realized I was falling more in love with her over a period of years as we were living together. With every relationship up to that point, after a few months or a year I’d check in with myself and find out that I had a friend (or just a girl I hung out with) rather than a girlfriend.”- GByteKnight

“I’ve always been a commitment or bust kind of guy. I wouldn’t want a casual or open relationship of any kind. Before my wife and I got married we dated for 5 years and it was 100% commitment and 100% official from the very beginning. Any other way to do things just seemed weird to me.”- Naleid

“Meeting the right person, as cliche as that is. Still, i don’t plan on being sexually ‘committed.’”-lasagnaman

“I wanted to be genuinely loved, and that can only happen when you love that other person completely; ironically I’m in a place where girls really enjoy my company and time and enjoy seeing me, but aren’t looking for a relationship C’est la vie.”- charge_complete

“Now I’m not sure if I’ll ever be a committed guy again, but only time will reveal that. Exactly. Well no one knows that the future brings, but we can control what we want/deserve! Good relationships (from what I hear) enhance life!”- dododoo214

“Sexual compatibility with the right person. Met and dated lots of girls. Almost married one. Then I met the woman I’d marry, and the sex was incredible. It was perfect, and I wanted more of it all the time.” –bornredd

“When I was you get I put up with a lot of shot and staged with women for the wrong reasons. I grew up and account women the same respect I would expect myself. Now if it’s clear there is no future or it just wouldn’t work, I either break it off as soon as possible. And/or just be open about why it isn’t going anywhere. I’ve had women ha e the same talk with me. And as much as it hurts at the time, I really appreciate the honesty. I’m in my 30’s now and don’t have any time or inclination for falsehoods and game playing. There will always be those people of either gender that never learn or grow enough to realise what a find they choose effect others. But I’m glad for myself that I’ve learned to be a better human being. I’m far from perfect and will never be. But at least I can honestly say I’m finally being honest with myself and other people. Sometimes the decisions are hard to make. And no matter what you do you end up hurting someone. But this is unavoidable sometimes. It’s just a case of being grown up and having enough empathy to do the right thing.”- rageth 

“I grew up in a broken home, I vowed to start a family and be loyal, committed and to love my girlfriend/wife, start a family, have kids and be a great father, nothing is more important to me.”- ixtab1923

“I wouldn’t say I’d string women along I’d rather just casually date other people until I got bored and moved to the next one. Now though it’s different I’ve fallen hard for my now girlfriend and I’ve never been happier.”- Kush_on_thebrain

“I don’t think there’s a difference between a person who wants commitment and a person who doesn’t. I think everyone generally wants the same thing but there are just different levels of desperation. People who say they want something serious are just more desperate than those who say they’re looking for just fun. In both instances when they find the right person they want commitment.”- yessum447

“In my teens and beginning of my 20s, I slept around a lot. I didn’t care about anyone. I then met a good woman who made me care about everything. Including myself.”- Earnin_and_BERNin

“I then met a good woman who made me care about everything. Including myself. How did she do that? Happy you found love and yourself!” – dododoo214