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How Do You Cope When You Think Things Like ‘I Hate My Body’?

Sadly, and unfortunately, sometimes we unexpectedly catch sight of ourselves and find that we don’t really like what we see at the moment. Whether it’s the shape of our nose, our bodies, or hair, unfair body expectations can wear on us and make us feel ugly one day despite feeling beautiful on other days.

Recently, we stumbled across a Reddit post that asked users how they manage to cope when they have negative thoughts about their bodies. Beyond being helpful, the answers were invigorating.

Check them out below.

Try saying three nice things about yourself each day.

“I look in the mirror and don’t look away until I say 3 nice things I like about my body. Eventually, it became second nature and now I’m vain af.” –not_doing_that

“Ummm… this may not be helpful to you. But to be totally honest with you, what’s helped me more than any sort of self-love type of approach was just realizing that, to be blunt, I have two options: I can either change what I dislike or else accept that it doesn’t matter. I spent years working on my physical self-esteem with, honestly, limited success. At some point, though, I realized that it doesn’t actually matter. I’m not important; details about my appearance are even less important; and me spending time agonizing over it is a pointless self-indulgence. The more I thought about that, the more I found it to be kind of liberating. I’m one person in six billion. Nobody cares about my looks or my self-image but me, and I have other things more worth my time worrying about. I’ve changed a few things I didn’t like. I fixed my teeth, for instance, and I get some Botox and fillers these days. The rest of it, it’s just like… meh, time to move on. I still have my insecurities for sure, but I no longer wallow in them the way I did.” – user

Think of your future self.

“Two things I have adopted in all the many many years of abysmal body image and eating disorders and all that shit:

  1. Remember nobody notices/cares about my “flaws” as much as I do. I am literally deciding their importance. So instead of saying “ugh I’ve got rolls when I sit/my thighs touch because I’m lazy and disgusting and nobody will ever love me,” I can instead start saying “I have rolls when I sit because I have fat in my stomach, which is necessary for my body to function correctly. My thighs touch because that is how my legs look when I am at a healthy weight.” etc etc and then it goes from an assignment of value to just an objective fact about me, like my blood type or my shoe size.
  2. Remember that when I am 80 I am not going to lose sleep over not being 10 lbs lighter or two inches taller or blessed with a nicer bum. I’d be far more likely to regret a pattern of avoiding social situations because I don’t feel pretty enough, or to regret not having many pictures with my loved ones who are gone because my hair was messy or I wasn’t wearing a flattering outfit. Like, I never look at photos of my loved ones and think “damn, she should have avoided the camera, she looks bloated and tired.” I’m like “Oh I remember that trip to visit my auntie, and how good her cooking was, and how cool it was to learn that she loved the same author I did and that conversation we had when I couldn’t sleep and she told me about being my age and I realized she understood me…”

I frequently have to check myself to make sure I’m focusing on the shit that matters and not hiding who I am just because I don’t think the package I come in measures up.” – glorioid

Work hard on making yourself feel happy with yourself in the ways that you can healthily control.

“I’m heavier than I ever was when I hated my looks. These days I think I’m pretty fab, I work hard to be a pretty cool person, and I work reasonably hard to look good and stay in decent shape. I’m nowhere near physically perfect, but I love myself holistically and I figure life is way too short not to eat chocolate, put my butt on display in a pencil dress, and any number of other things my 18-year-old twig of a self would have been mortified about. Turns out there’s more to life than obsessing about how I look in a negative way. If I’m going to obsess about how I look, I at least try and do it in a positive way now. I also realized that if you’re a healthy weight, confident, and well dressed, you’re basically going to be attractive. Perfect is not a requirement in any other area of life so there’s no point making it one of my own.” – grittex

“I remind myself of how incredible the human body is and try to think of the amazing things my body does to keep me alive and let me enjoy the world. Who cares if I don’t look like a model? My heart pumps around 2,000 gallons of blood every day and my bones are as strong as granite. How cool is that? Also, I try to remember that I don’t owe the world attractiveness for daring to exist. It’s not my job to be visually pleasing.” – tomorrowistomato

“It depends on how I hate it. If it’s something about my body screwing up (getting sick, tripping and breaking something, not being tall enough to reach something) I sulk and get over it. I’m lucky enough that my body is mostly healthy (no chronic illnesses to deal with, or things like that) and I have to accept that sometimes it’s not going to cooperate. But when it comes to appearance: I try to remind myself that my looks are just one part of me. I step away from the mirror. I focus on some aspect of my looks that I can control (maybe my face is covered in acne, but I can put my frizzy hair in bun to manage that issue) and ideally try to remember the things I like about my body. While it’s not uncommon for me to look into the mirror and frown at how gross I look (the scowl really doesn’t help), it personally only bothers me for as long as I’m looking at it. So I usually try to make it look a bit better (brush my hair, do makeup, etc.) if I can, or else I just try to focus on something else. I have ADD though, so my attention span doesn’t usually allow me to dwell on it any longer than 2 minutes after I finish looking in the mirror.” –BundleofAnxiety

Stop comparing.

“I stopped judging other people. I grew up in a very judgmental family, struggled with an eating disorder for years, and constantly compared myself to others or even silently picked out things on other people I didn’t like to try to make myself feel better. As soon as I stopped doing that, I felt infinitely better. Instead of thinking “wow, that shirt/dress etc are too for him/her” I thought ” wow, they look good in that color” or “props to them for wearing something they’re told they ‘shouldn’t'”. When I made that change it became easier to apply that same way of thinking to myself.” –hanchan21

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Studies Say Women Are Struggling To Breastfeed For As Long As They Should, Fortunately, Latinas Are Sharing Their Best Tips

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Studies Say Women Are Struggling To Breastfeed For As Long As They Should, Fortunately, Latinas Are Sharing Their Best Tips

Jeff Topping / Getty

If there’s one thing mothers know to be true it’s that the difficulty of motherhood doesn’t end with childbirth. When it comes to motherhood, breastfeeding in particular often proves to be one of the most difficult early steps. In fact, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), only 57 percent of women who breastfeed continue to do so six months after giving birth. It’s a surprising number considering the fact that the CDC also recommends that women pursue the act of breastfeeding for six months at least and that the benefits of breastfeeding are extensive. Breastfeeding has long proven to aid in the prevention of diabetes in both mothers and children, as well as the prevention of childhood obesity, allergies, SIDS, and serious infections.

Still, the process can be trying and hard.

Fortunately, Latinas are sharing their tips and techniques for keeping up with breastfeeding.

If you’re at the start of your early breastfeeding days, check out some of the tips to help you make it through below.

“Don’t give up! It gets better! Seek out help from a lactation consultant at your OB/GYN’s office or hospital — some insurance plans cover the visit at no cost. Or contact your local La Leche League for free support from other nursing moms.” –mami.guevara

“Breastfed 5 babies…best advice is relax…and every baby is different…it’s okay to ask for help…” –mommy_dee55

“Breastfed for 2 1/2 years; first 5 months were the hardest! Take your time and be patient but MOST OF ALL do what’s best for you and your baby!!” –vida_de_maddrre

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, you are a great mom. No matter how your breastfeeding journey goes, your child will be loved. That is the best you can do for your child.” –noramia1

“I say just relax it takes time for some babies to latch on. But do what’s best for you, if you can’t breastfeed DON’T be ashamed, (and others need to stop the Mommy shaming!) you can use formula, it’s not the end of the world. I have two daughters the first one breastfeed til 19 months and my 9 month old is still breastfeeding. It’s not easy but all you new mom’s out there, just know you are great.” –angie17_lo

“Keep pumping and try milkmakers lactation cookies. They are delicious and helped me so much along with fenugreek vitamins. Be patient use formula when you need to. Do what works for you mama you know best for your baby, if it’s boob great if it’s formula great. Good luck.” –rosebuds00

“One👏🏽Day👏🏽At👏🏽A👏🏽Time… Breastfeeding is NOT easy! Do what best works for you.. Even if you can only pump….but don’t give up!”nursesandy_83

“Bruh yes I’m barely on 3 WEEKS and wondering how I’m going to make it to atleast my birthday (May).” –gabrielagnunez

“Don’t hesitate to switch to formula. I was unable to produce enough to feed my baby. Formula is a safe and nutritious alternative.” –partunicorn

“If you and your baby are not thriving, switch feeding tactics. You’re not a bad mom if breastfeeding doesn’t work for you.” –alexandriatrece

“Pump when needed. The bottle and formula are fine too. As long as your baby is getting nourishment. My kid was too lazy to take the boob. I ended up pumping and giving her a bottle. She got breast milk and I had so much milk for back up. It all works out. She ended up being weened of the bottle quickly. Sipping cups were her fave. She’s 28 and very healthy!” –mrsclny

“Patience is everything. If you plan on breastfeeding you must know it won’t be easy (or it will) but every baby is different. You’ll be nursing around the clock sometimes for hours on the couch or bed. But it’s doable and for me the best decision for my kids. Sometimes I wanted to stop, but I saw their little faces and bodies growing. It was empowering that I was nourishing them. Hang in their moms, again every journey is different. Some have to go back to work, pump.. other are at home. Whatever you decided is your choice. I nursed both my kids until 3 1/2.” –glendamurakami

“Hang in there mamis! It is so worth it. The pain, scabs, and unexpected let downs go away over a few weeks/months. It’s will be the most rewarding thing you’ve ever done.” –chicadel77

“this is why i pumped for a year, instead of direct nursing. there was a lot going on in my life and latching a baby to the breast at all hours of the day just seemed like too much. i’m still super happy that i was able to provide breastmilk for a year.” –damarysocana

“Every mom & every baby is different. Do what works for you & your baby. Ignore any & all negativity that goes your way. You brought a little human to this world; that’s your priority. Focus on your precious baby & enjoy your time with him/her, the time goes by so fast!” –glass.of.oj

“It’s hard. I tried and tried. My baby wouldn’t latch on and would not stop crying. Eventually I tried pumping but my supply gave out. My son is now 17 and he is a healthy, strong, kind young man. I’ll say this, try as hard as you can but if it doesn’t work, you know you did your best. Don’t beat yourself up about it. Normalize trying but finding a solution that works.” –adris_world220

“Value your own mental health too and switch to formula if you want to. It’s a safe, nutritious alternative.” –vivrami

“Seek a lactation consultant! Also, keep at it! More challenging than giving birth, according to my SO.” –sints.slrzno

“One day at a time. I breastfed all of my three children so I know how difficult and anxiety provoking it can sometimes be. No shame in fórmula at all. Do what works for you and be good to yourself.” –belkise.elena

“Just don’t give up! Keep offering it to baby and pump so you don’t get clogs. It takes a while to get into a rhythm but it will happen just have faith!5d1 likeReply

“Do whatever works for you. If it isn’t working that’s fine. No shame in formula and no shame in whipping your tittys out in public. Do whatever the fuck is best for you and your baby.” – stuffonstuff

“If you have the resources, seeing a lactation consultant is helpful. Pumping so you don’t become engorged if the baby is skipping feedings. I would say it took about three months to get a rhythm with my babies. Good luck.”- clarissava


“Nipple shield! Turns boob into bottle! Also pump the milk if they don’t latch and just bottle feed the breast milk. But mostly… Don’t sweat it! Sometimes babies just ween themselves off the booby, it’s natural!”- queen_of_my_castle_xx

“Keep pumping and try milkmakers lactation cookies. They are delicious and helped me so much along with fenugreek vitamins. Be patient use formula when you need to. Do what works for you mama you know best for your baby, if it’s boob great if it’s formula great. Good luck.”-rosebuds00

“Be patient and enjoy the moment. It seems like a long time but, time flies and you’ll miss it.” –galvanizestem


“Nursed each of my 4 kids for 2 years. Patience and perseverance are key. Listen to your body and your baby. There is no right or wing way to do it, only your way. What works for your family is it. Be open minded and flexible. Best of luck.” –dianapatricia_66


“I’ve breastfed 4 babies. One Set of Twins, one baby exclusively breastfed until 2yo and my last baby until 3.5yo. Each baby is different. They latch differently and your body will respond differently to each one. Best advice is to relax. I know it’s hard to hear, especially if you have so many other things to tend to. They feel it when you are tense. and find their favorite nursing position …try them all. You’ll find a sweet spot eventually. And feel free to allow yourself the option to supplement when needed.”-crdguzman

“I breastfeed exclusively for 2 years (no bottle, no formula, no pacifier)! Breastfeeding is the best you can do for yourself and your baby! There are so many resources out there and honestly misinformation is what causes a lot of women to never breastfeed or give up. If anyone needs help let me know!”- niraarin

“Yes, as many moms have said before don’t give up. I am currently breastfeeding exclusively to my 10month old son. I have breastfed my 2 children prior. He has definitely been the hardest! The first 5 months was filled with feelings of self doubt, guilt and pain. Now that he is 10 months, I can say i am more than glad to still be breastfeeding. It is so much easier to not worry about formula, bottles or anything. All I do is whip out my breast and that’s it. He is a happy happy baby! First few months you do have to be next to baby all day because of constant feedings and keep in mind your baby has been used to being in your womb for 9 months, it takes time lose that attachment. But keep going and you won’t regret it! Take time for yourself every once in a while and remember you created a little human who you have the ability to nourish. Our bodies have been blessed with that ability.”- vivalayumyums

“Pump when needed. The bottle and formula are fine too. As long as your baby is getting nourishment. My kid was too lazy to take the boob. I ended up pumping and giving her a bottle. She got breast milk and I had so much milk for back up. It all works out. She ended up being weened of the bottle quickly. Sipping cups were her fave. She’s 28 and very healthy!”- mrsclny



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Top Reviewed Brushes for Naturally Curly Hair

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Top Reviewed Brushes for Naturally Curly Hair

Arthur Elgort / Conde Nast / Getty

Every curly-haired girl knows that to ensure strength and growth in their tresses, staple items are needed. From a moisturizing deep conditioner to a perfect leave-in conditioner, these staples are vital for the care and keeping of our natural hair. With the right brush, curlies can stop breakage, put an end to split ends, and see growth if that’s what they’re seeking. We searched the internet for the best brush tools for Curly Hair and put them on a list for you.

Here’s a look at the top brushes you’ll want for detangling your natural hair.

Ouidad Double Detangler Comb

Curly Hair brush
Amazon.com

Users say Ouidad’s Double Detangler is perfect for those with curly, thicker hair. The brush features double rows of comb teeth and is perfect for tackling tangles without being too forceful or rough.

“This is the best comb that I’ve ever used for detangling my hair. It detangles with ease and with a speed that I’ve never experienced and I couldn’t be happier. I have a range of 3c, 4a and 4b hair and this comb handles all of it with ease.” Amazon.com user.

Denman Brush

Curly Hair brush

An absolute classic, the Denman Brush has long been touted as the fairy godmother of brushes. Loved by 3c to 4 hair types the Denman brush has been known to dentangle its way through curlier hair pattern with a stroke of the brush.

Ladies and Gents do yourself a favor and get you a brush! My boyfriend is so shocked at my curls too! Honestly, I had never thought I could have a consistent curl pattern. The pics are 6 weeks apart but my curls never were this defined as they are with the Denman brush. I had 3B but now I am full 3C hair curl type.

I didn’t remove any rows and combined my curls with Shea Moisture Hair smoothie and some eco gel to style. Watch some youtube videos to help see how to properly brush hair out. I sectioned it into layers and even tried out bangs for the first time since the curls are so tight and I am seeing consistent coils!” – Amazon user.

Remington Detangle Brush for Curly Hair

Curly Hair

According to reviews, this electric styling tool really lives up to its name. The brush’s description says the brush’s teeth rock back and forth to loosen knots and tangles from hair without snagging or breaking your hair, working to cause less shedding. Users say that while it takes longer, the process is worth it.

“Love this detangler. I’ve been natural on and off for almost 40 years and this is the best detangler I’ve come across. It takes me longer to detangle with the vs a wide tooth comb. However, there is less shedding and breakage. I used my on wet hair with conditioner in it. My hair is more elongated after styling using this brush. I will be buying 2 as gifts,” wrote on Amazon user.

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