Things That Matter

People On Twitter Are Sharing Their Hilarious Moments Of Catholic Guilt

Ah. Catholic guilt. It’s the thing that keeps you up at night after missing a phone call with your Abuela and submitting to your mom’s demands that you drag your feet to church with her on any given Sunday. No matter where you are in your life, whatever parts of your faith you’ve cast aside, it sticks with you like eucharist to your tongue.  After all, catholic guilt is like living with your own personal nun who speaks truths and anxieties into your ear for the rest of your life. She asks if it’s real worth it to risk eternal hellfire for that one white lie or speeding in a neighborhood. Here are all of the times, Catholic guilt really got you.

The first time you start to think that sex before marriage might be caca?

And your Catholic school teachings snap your right back in for a few more years. Of course, through ought these years you experiment with a lot of “self-care” which you also feel guilty about. TBH you probably also used your virginity and ceasing to stop flicking the ol’ bean as a bartering chip for waiting to have sex too. 

When it feels so wrong that it feels so good.

“We all know catholic guilt is why we are kinky mfs”. And you KNOW that all of those years of delayed gratification led to a world full of weird kinks and freaks that you might even feel a little guilty for being into now. 

When the weather feels great but global warming.

“I know a lot of people are confused by the commingling emotions of “this weather feels so good,” and “we will pay for this and the earth is for sure dying,” so for those uninitiated I would like to say welcome to Catholic guilt” – @ohJuliatweets. You know global warming is a problem and yet, you can’t help but thank the stars for how warm it’s been this winter season. 

It’s the thing that walks with you in life like that story of Jesus’s feet on the beach.

https://twitter.com/Danyul_manyul/status/1214660728751370249

“Not ever dealing with catholic guilt and shame.”

It haunts you years and years later.

“When I was 22, I pretended the Nsync/Britney Spears cd I was buying at McDonalds drive-thru was for my 4 year old niece in the backseat becuz I was embarrassed. I still feel bad about that. Just in case anyone wonders what Catholic guilt feels like & how long it lasts. FOREVER!!”

And don’t get it twisted, Catholic guilt will be there with you through thick and thin. 

Because it will come for you in the A.M. 

It pops back at you when it’s time to eat.

So you never overindulge without feeling extremely guilty for it. In fact, you probably feel way worse after years of being told about all of the starving kids in Africa.

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