Things That Matter

Reddit Users Are Sharing Their Craziest New Year’s Eve Stories And I Can’t Believe Some Of Them Didn’t Make The News

While many folks enjoy the shenanigans of New Years Eve, just as many people think this holiday is awful. Even if you belong to the former camp, you’ve got to admit—New Years Eve is chaotic, loud, messy, and fit to bursting with overenthusiastic, highly intoxicated swarms of people. Big crowds, an abundance of various substances, and hedonistic cheer are, well, kind of a recipe for disaster. And even if you love New Years, you’ve probably had some less than savory experiences on this indulgent, celebratory night of debauchery. People are sharing some of their worst New Years Eve memories, and we’ve collected some of them here to get you in the spirit!

This person had the misfortune of being at a party with teenagers who had never drunk everclear before . . . and whomever was renting the condo had the misfortune of cleaning up after them.

Credit: Youtube/TheTipsyBartender

“Friends from Kentucky brought Everclear to put in our punch at a rented condo at a ski area. Before the ball dropped, there were red stains all over the carpet from said Everclear punch coming out of people’s mouths in the form of throw-up because it turns out that 17 to 19-year-olds can’t handle their Everclear in fruit punch form.” – Will-PGP

This girl discovered that the dude she was dating didn’t only have eyes for her.

Credit: Pinterest

“Went to a NYE concert where a guy I was semi-seeing and his band were playing. I had planned on surprising him, because I originally thought I couldn’t make it. Midway through the show he’s like ‘I’m dedicating this next song to a special lady. She said she couldn’t make it but I just spotted her in the audience, and I couldn’t be happier.’ My heart was a-flutter. ‘Here’s to you, Anna.’ My name is not Anna. He pulls some other girl on stage and starts serenading her. I honestly thought I was going to die then and there. As soon as I could escape, I ran out of the venue, crying all the way down Essex. Stopped in a bodega, bought a six pack of Coors Light, and drank them on the train ride home.” – boothismanbooooo

This person broke several bones in their body, but managed to rescue their new MacBook from impending doom.

Credit: Pinterest

“I started off last year by falling down a marble staircase. Busted an arm, a few ribs and couldn’t sit on my ass for 2 weeks. Somehow managed to keep the MacBook I was carrying intact.” – Rootix

This woman was almost impaled by a falling sheet of glass.

Credit: Getty Images

“Walking home down Orchard Street just below Delancey a few years ago, alone and a little drunk, I heard some laughing from an apartment up above and looked up just in time to see a sheet of glass thrown out a window. It shattered directly in front of me. Terrifying, but also just really weird. I counted my lucky stars and kept walking.”  – miss_cheongfun

This person’s face was changed forever by a dance party gone wrong.

Credit: Paul Phillipson

“In high school I was at a crowded party and a song came on that I loved. The guy I was standing next to also loved it and we both started dancing emphatically and simultaneously banged our heads together. Our heads made a sickening sound upon impact and I saw stars for a few minutes as he asked me over and over if I was okay. I left the party 15 minutes before midnight and it left a permanent dent in my forehead that I can still see when I raise my eyebrows. That was 24 years ago.” –mcshortpants

This guy, unbeknownst to him, traveled back in time.

Credit: Poketo

“My brother got me drunk and put up banners all over the house in the current year and made me think I was just having a dream. He even recorded the last year’s New Year’s show and put in the DVD.” –Anonymous

This person just couldn’t catch a break.

“Showing up at a party with a bright gold wig and 2004 NYE sunglasses and some comfy jeans only to find that it was black tie and fancy. Host (best friend) forgot to mention it. It was super awkward (I was 17 and it was about 50 grown ups and maybe 5 people my age). Everyone stared and was super rude with disapproving faces and comments. I tried to brush it off for a while but decided it best to leave. Get outside and my car doesnt start. I start walking home (about 30 mins) and find someone beside the road with their car in the ditch. I offer to help push it out. As I am pushing, he gases it and the wheels spin absolutely drenching me head to toe in mud.” –RedSkyTechnologies

Jason Derulo Tried To Eat Corn Off Of A Power Drill And The Level Of ‘Ouch’ Is Just…

Entertainment

Jason Derulo Tried To Eat Corn Off Of A Power Drill And The Level Of ‘Ouch’ Is Just…

Jason Derulo / Instagram

Like many of us practicing social distancing, Jason Derulo is bored and taking part in the modern-American past time of TikTok trends.

Though a bit late to the game, Derulo’s latest TikTok post sees him trying out a trend we saw taking off last year: you take corn on the cob, put it on a drill, and then power up while you try to eat. Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen, just wait.

In a recent post to his TikTok account, Derulo shared a video of himself attempting to eat corn off of a drill for the sake of the Gram and things went south real quick.

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Don’t try this 😭😭

A post shared by Jason Derulo (@jasonderulo) on

The singer kicked off the video by asking his fans and viewers if they’d ever seen anyone eat corn off of a drill. Speaking about the life hack, Derulo said that he’d always wanted to try it out. The video starts off slowly, with Derulo slowly powering up the drill and then going faster with the drill while he attempts to eat the corn. He keeps going for a few more seconds until he cries out in pain.

When he pulls away he shows that he’s chipped a tooth.

“Don’t try this,” Derulo wrote in a caption on Instagram with two sad emojis.

Users have suggested that Derulo’s chipped tooth might be fake but it’s pretty convincing.

Yeah, we know all about the magic of editing and fake teeth but… it looks pretty insane.

Check out the chipped tooth moment here.

Comments about the big flub were far from easy on Derulo but also quite a bit funny.

“Ooooooooo shit 🤣🤣🤣 “jathun darulo,'” – tydollasign

“Why do I cover my eyes while watching this for 12th times?” – rudybundini

“VerifiedThere’s no way! You would be bleeding! I can’t handle this lmfaooo,” a doubtful TikTok user wrote thekalenallen.

“We need to know! Did you really just take out your 2 front teeth?!?” _thareal_mccoy_wrote begging the question that has the entire internet pulsing with questions today.

Maluma Is Keeping Us Up To Date On His Life In Quarantine And I Couldn’t Be More Grateful

Entertainment

Maluma Is Keeping Us Up To Date On His Life In Quarantine And I Couldn’t Be More Grateful

maluma/ Instagram

Stars, they’re just like us, right? I mean kind of. Sure, Maluma is also in self-isolation thanks to the global Coronavirus pandemic. But he’s in quarantine in his hometown of Medellin on his palatial estate and looking better than he’s ever looked. Meanwhile, I’m in quarantine in Mexico City, I’ve put on probably 10 pounds and sometimes more than 24 hours go by before I realize I haven’t even brushed my teeth. So no…stars aren’t just like us.

But I’m glad they’re not because then I get to thirst after Maluma through his very thirsty social media content. Sure, Maluma shirtless isn’t that big of a deal since, well he’s basically always shirtless, but something about him being so almost naked and living his best #quarantinelife is just what I need right now.

Maluma’s 11:11 World Tour had to be put on pause due to the Coronavirus outbreak but he’s been making up for it with some seriously #bts content.

Following the delay of his world tour, Maluma travelled back to his hometown of Medellin, where’s he’s been spending quarantine since mid-March. So for nearly two months now, the reggaetónero has been spending quality time with his family, focused on his health and body (it shows!) and has even released a new single (and video) called “ADMV” – “Amor de mi Vida.”

In a previous interview with Billboard, Maluma said, “I realized I was investing so much energy, so much time in my career that I was forgetting about myself, about my spirit and the important things in life like my family, like finding that love of my life… I’m tired about listening to the same kinds of songs; people talking about diamonds and about Ferraris. There are more important things.”

Swoon.

Maluma has even let fans in on a behind-the-scenes look into his home – and I was living for it.

In the video, presented by Architectural Digest – which Maluma shot himself – the singer calls his home his ‘sanctuary’ and it’s easy to see why. Situated up in the green hills outside of Medellín, his home is gorgeous. He reveals he’s lived there for three years and it’s truly his home.

Even his morning routine left me in giggles as he describes how he wakes up in the morning, descends to the ground level in his private elevator, and makes his very own cup of coffee. Minus the elevator part, very relatable.

Since he’s been spending so much time at home – he’s also been showering his fans with shirtless photos.

Credit: maluma / Instagram

With another quarantine week in full swing, Maluma, posing in a steamy shirtless photo, asked fans who was the love of their life. Fans immediately showered the comment section with “you are,” and it’s easy to see why.

Serving smiles and body.

Credit: maluma / Instagram

From Instagram lives to mini-photoshoots, Maluma has been keeping himself (and many of us) very busy. He’s helped make this quarantine a little less horrible thanks to his nearly daily dose of thirst trapping – that’s right it’s not just for Thursdays.

Walking the dogs really builds up a sweat.

Credit: maluma / Instagram

Maluma has made it well-known that he loves animals – especially his two dogs Bonnie and Clyde. He posts about them frequently and when one of them fell ill – he was heartbroken but thankfully they recovered. Now, we get to enjoy photos of him spending time with two of his best friends – shirtless. I’m here for it.

He even shared a #BTS of his makeup work for the video of ‘ADMV’.

Credit: maluma / Instagram

Ok…so this isn’t typically what I thirst after. But it was cool to see some behind the scenes shots of this next level makeup job that left the 26-year-old singer looking twice his age.

And OK this has nothing to do with his quarantine life but it’s too good not to include here.

Credit: maluma / Instagram

Shot for this Calvin Klein campaign, Maluma left millions speechless with the full-body, nearly-nude photoshoot.