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In Celebration Of Funny Latinas

Hot Take Time:Latinas aren’t given nearly enough credit for being the funniest people on the planet.

Let’s fix that by focusing on a few of the most hilarious women in recent history. OK? OK!

Velia Martínez

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Credit: PBS / YouTube

If you’ve never seen “¿Qué Pasa, USA?,” you need to get on that immediately. If you’re already a fan, you’ll agree the show’s shining star is far and away Velia Martínez as the quintessential Cuban abuela. The episode in which she attempts to pass her citizenship test is *kisses fingertips* pure comedic gold, especially when you keep in mind that Velia was actually fluent in English the entire time.

Eva Longoria

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Credit: NBC / Mitú

Eva Longoria gets a lot of well-deserved attention for her work in politics and media in general, but not enough is said about her truly impeccable comedic timing. Need evidence? Look no further than her Golden Globes bit with fellow Latina America Ferrera.

America Ferrera

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Credit:  ABC / Bustle

…Speaking of America: Yup, she’s here, too! Because as excited as we are for her turn in “Superstore,” “Ugly Betty” remains a comedy classic thanks in large part to America’s expert ability to mix being hopelessly awkward and endlessly endearing in a charming, hilarious way.

Shayla Rivera

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Credit: StandUpBits / YouTube

If you’ve never watched Shayla Rivera’s thoughts on why there’s no dude equivalent of “Girls Gone Wild” for women, do yourself a huge favor and watch that now. With all due respect to those with balls, “huevos aren’t pretty.” Sorry.

Sandra Valls

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Credit: ChickComedy / YouTube

Sandra mines a lot of humor not only from being female and Latina (like, you know, every other awesome person on this list), but also from being gay. Check out her bit on being gay, Mexican and pale (Yes, she’s heard aaaallll the nicknames) right over here.

Aida Rodriguez

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Credit: Laugh Factory / YouTube

Aida’s stand-up comedy is based on saying the things we all want to, but usually can’t. For example, when discussing the joys of motherhood Aida says, “I have a seventeen-year-old daughter. And I don’t like that bitch.” Which: fair. We’ve all been a teen girl. We get it.

Aubrey Plaza

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Credit: NBC / Giphy

Not only was she basically the poster woman for grumpy Latinas everywhere as April Ludgate, Aubrey was also the voice of the grumpiest of all cats. She’s made the switch to the big screen in movies like “Scott Pilgrim vs. the World,” “Safety Not Guaranteed” (where she showed she can do more subtle, “why-is-this-making-me-cry” comedy, too) and “The To Do List.” Plus, she’s Chris Bosh’s mom.

Anjelah Johnson

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Credit: YouTube / Gif2Fly

Anjelah Johnson’s been at this whole comedy thing for some time now. You might remember her best for her time on MADtv, but she’s also been in movies, including lending her voice to “The Book of Life.” If you want more Anjelah, you can enjoy her 2015 comedy special, “Not Fancy,” riiiight now.

Belita Moreno

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Credit: ABC / Tumbnation

A fact about ICON Belita Moreno: Not only was she one of the best, most hilarious things about “George Lopez,” she also had a role in CAMP CLASSIC “Mommie Dearest,” which automatically makes her an idol now and forever. Honestly, just look at her acting credits — which include “Full House,” “Golden Girls,” “Roseanne” and “Melrose Place” — and bow down.

Sofia Vergara

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Credit: NBC / Tumblr

No matter how you might feel like about her character Gloria’s comments about what it means to be Colombian, there’s no doubt that Sofia, in addition to being a pretty phenomenal business woman, is a kickass comedic actress with terrific timing and a willingness to do whatever it takes for the sake of a joke.

Cristela Alonzo

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Credit: TBS / TeamCoco

Her NBC sitcom was gone too soon, but we cannot wait to see what Cristela comes up with next. And in the meantime, we have her stellar stand-up to keep us going. Her bit about going to nightclubs is a great place to start.

Gina Brillon

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Credit: NUVOtv / YouTube

Like, I want to hang out with Gina Brillon. I want us to get drinks and maybe some mozzarella stick situation and just talk about whatever she feels like that talking about…like being in your 30s and still loving the beautiful tragedy that is Forever 21. Plus, she just so happens to be Gabriel “Fluffy” Iglesias’ protégée. No big deal.

Sofia Gonzalez

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Credit: Más Mejor / YouTube

Sofia’s been featured on BuzzFeed and Más Mejor and is set to star in an upcoming comedy on ABC. So keep your eye on her for sure. In the meantime, you can check out her web series about dating (and then very quickly… not dating).

Cardi B

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Credit: VH1 / onehallyu

Cardi B is, in a word, perfect. She’s woke, ambitious, driven, smart, and funny as hell. Her Instagram videos are super addictive and will keep you laughing for hours. If you’re not devoted to Cardi B, then we can’t be friends. This is, after all, the woman who gave the world the immortal phrase “A ho never gets cold.”

READ: Now’s a Good Time to Revisit the Time Chris Rock Said Mexicans Don’t Get Enough Love from Hollywood

Did we miss your favorite funny Latina? Let us know, below!

How The FBI-Apple Battle Could Affect Millions of Latinos

things that matter

How The FBI-Apple Battle Could Affect Millions of Latinos

Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

Apple and the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) are currently entrenched in a legal battle over encryption. Believe it or not, the outcome of that fight could affect the Latino community. Here’s why:

Wait, what are they fighting about?

Credit: “Last Week Tonight”/ HBO/ YouTube

The best explanation on why Apple and the FBI are fighting in court was given by John Oliver last week. If you don’t have 18 minutes to spare, here’s the basic gist: The FBI is currently in possession of an iPhone that belonged to Syed Rizwan Farook, one of the two San Bernardino shooters. Unfortunately for the FBI, the iPhone is passcode-protected, and the government agency can’t break into it because of the privacy protections Apple has put in place. As a result, the FBI has asked Apple to update its software so that it can traverse those protections. Apple has said no.

Why Should I Care?

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Credit: BoingBoing/ Giphy

Because if Apple gives the FBI what they want, it’ll be a slippery slope. The FBI is trying to paint this as a “one time only” kind of thing. Apple says that if they give in, they’ll be opening a Pandora’s box where law enforcement officials can come to them at any point and ask them to do the same thing. This isn’t an unfounded fear. A recent court filing showed that Apple already has 12 requests asking for the same thing. Think of it this way: you know that really anxious and uncomfortable feeling you get when someone borrows your phone for like even a second? Well imagine that instead of it being your friend, it’s the cops. If that doesn’t freak you out, you’re just straight up lying.

Does this really matter?

Credit: @wombel/Twitter

At the end of the day, it boils down to the right to privacy, which is guaranteed to U.S. citizens by the Fourth Amendment. The counterargument to this is that if you have nothing to hide, then you should have nothing to be worried about. With all due respect, that’s straight up dumb. I’m gonna let my homeboy Edward Snowden, who’s on Apple’s side, take this one.

Ok, that’s all fine and good, but how does it affect Latinos?

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Credit: Univision Noticias/YouTube

I’m getting there, gosh! Okay, so remember how I said that law enforcement agencies could and would ask Apple to unlock other iPhones for them? Well, one of those agencies could be Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) or the Border Patrol. In fact, this is the argument that Eddy Cue, Apple’s highest ranking Latino executive, made to Univision recently. Obviously, Cue is representing Apple’s interest, but in this case they also happen to be our interests. And yes, this might sound like a too far-fetched scenario, but then again, law enforcement officials have already begun using social media to target immigrants.

WATCH: Body Cam Footage Shows Man Pleading With Police that He Can’t Breathe Moments Before He Dies

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