Cristela Alonzo is the kind of funny that makes your belly hurt from laughing so much. Which is precisely why she is everyone’s soulmate. The stand-up comedian, writer and actress is a badass queen, and we’re crushing on her every day.
Here are nine times Cristela made all of us fall in love with her:
1. When she did this amazing dance move:
Get it, girl! Could honestly watch this over and over.
2. When she was honest about her life:
She is inspiring to so many, and especially those with big dreams.
3. And when she kept it real about her upbringing:
Most celebs can often seem totally unrelatable, but Cristela keeps it real and is honest about her beginnings and how hard she worked to get to where she is today.
4. When she chugged this beer like a boss:
YAAAS. All hail the power of a cold beer.
5. When she dropped this truth bomb:
Good LAWD! This woman is fire, and she’s so real. She knows the Latino struggle.
6. And then when she was all ABOUT dropping that truth bomb:
Is it too late to get her to run for office? Personally, we think her and Hillary would be a dope pair.
7. When she said this about nicknames:
Credit: Comedy Central
And if we know one thing, it’s that Latinos love nicknames.
8. When she kept it real about scales:
Credit: Comedy Central
Can’t. Breathe. Dying.
9. When she made our hearts rejoice by saying this:
Cristela’s humor is so spot-on and we love this woman so much.
There is something about your parents staying friends with your ex that drives people crazy. Like, they also made connections with those people and they might really like them. However, should they take your side and just cut them off? That is the debate raging right now after on Twitter user confronted his mom about liking one of his ex’s Instagram photos.
Here is the moment Alan Zamora confronted his mother about liking his ex’s photo on social media.
He confronted him mother with a, “WTF?!” She responded simply with, “Terminó contigo, pero no conmigo.” She added: “She’s my friend.” Now, that is just some cold honesty about the importance of making sure your parents don’t get too attached to your novios and novias.
Her insistence on being friends with his ex led him to ask for new moms.
Who wants to give this man the mom he clearly wants. Obviously, he is looking for fierce loyalty and a mother who will never side with his ex over him. Also must be able to be filmed for Twitter at a moment’s notice.
She even invited his ex over to hang out and we are all dead.
Honestly, we all love when our ex’s parents want to stay in touch with us. They clearly love what we have to offer to the world. However, have you ever been on the other side of this? Have you ever seen your parents try to hangout with your exes while liking their social media pics?
Some people saw this and thanked the universe that their parents can’t do the same thing.
Pro tip: Make your parents social media illiterate. If they don’t know how to do social media, they can’t break your heart like this. Imagine your mom having an entire Instagram just to stay connected with the exes she liked from your life.
Some moms came through to explain what is happening from her perspective.
It is kind of unfair for us to ask our parents to just cut someone out of their lives just because we couldn’t make it work. should they put their lives and hearts on pause just because our lives fell apart? It is a question that some moms legit want us to answer.
There were a few examples of parents taking it too far.
Like, who does this? How does your mom take a trip with one of your exes then send you photos of the trip? This is the ultimate betrayal. There you are just living life wanting to take a trip with your mom then she takes the one who got away. Shady.
Or how about coming home and seeing your ex straight chilling with your folks?
Suddenly, your safe space is gone. You can’t come home and just relax because suddenly you have an ex hanging out on the couch. What a disaster. What a life they must live to do this to their pride and joy.
Yet, some people think that it is actually a sweet reminder of how much your life impacts your parents.
Try not to cry thinking about how much you mean to your parents. They love you so much that they love everyone you love. That is true unconditional love. What a wonderful thing to think about.
Oh, and Zamora wants you to know that his mom is one of the most beautiful women despite the original video.
What a great son. Even when he is betrayed by his mother, he still supports her unconditionally.
We all know what it’s like to mentally prepare to see family after you’ve moved away from home. You’re going to hear all of the “ay, que flaquita” and “¿y el novio?” questions all in one breath. Those are just the most common questions. We all know that it never ends there. People are going to ask you about your job a million different ways, and still not get it.
Of course, every single viejo is going to ask you why you’re still single. “Mejor sola que mal acompañada,” so they say. Well, Melissa Croce had a lot more than that to tell her family and her reaction is something that can help all of us get ready for that family reunion.
Melissa Croce wanted to nip all questions in the bud with a handy brochure.
Apparently, it all started as a joke between Croce and her coworkers, but she couldn’t let go of the idea. After you read her brochure, you’ll understand why it’s so cathartic.
“So You Haven’t Seen Melissa Croce in Several Years: A Primer”
Here’s a lil life update on the subject of your chismosando, honey. “She’s beauty and she’s grace. She’ll say it to your face.” Boom. Roasted. Who hasn’t felt the same way when getting ready to see your family?
Croce handily has two separate columns for Job vs New York FAQS.
So many folks had a good laugh at the “Should you, though?” in response to “I should come visit you!” We’ve all braced ourselves through a fake grin answering highly judgmental questions. When they go low, we go high. When they go low, we go high. This brochure is pure low. 😂
You open the brochure to the question of the house: “Why is Melissa Single?”
You can choose whatever adventurous conversation experience you are initiating. What a perfect way to let the family know what they’re getting themselves into by passing judgment on single, working women.
Croce tweeted out her brochure and may have started a new side hustle for herself!
Follow your passions and everything else will follow. Even though Latinas can all relate to being asked this question, sexism is universal. Croce might have a new career calling!
Even folks are asking for her career advice at this point.
When you see success, you chase it, right? Croce works for a publishing company but isn’t editing or reading books. She’s marketing children’s books. You know, in case you didn’t read the brochure.
Croce didn’t actually pass out the brochures.
Of course, one *man* commented that, “The only thing that would be more petty than this would be actually giving it to people at the wedding.”
Croce told Buzzfeed, “I didn’t hand the brochures out! For one thing, I like my cousin, and secondly, I don’t think my aunts and uncles would’ve been too pleased with me if I did — but I did have to answer many of the questions on the brochure, so maybe I should’ve after all!”
One fan took the opportunity to formally ask Croce to be her life coach.
Croce was surprised to learn how relatable her experience was–“going to a big event and exposing the basics of your life to people who mean well, but are also strangers in many ways.”
She said yes, of course.
We’re glad some folks are appreciating Croce because the sexism hasn’t relented since she tweeted out the brochure. Folks have been telling her, “boo hoo, suck it up,” and “we get it, you’re sexist and hate men.”
Nope. Women expressing their frustration with sexism is not allowed in a patriarchal society, and that’s not stopping anyone.
So many people are taking this brochure to heart and figuring out how they can make it their own.
Thank you, Croce, and we hope the half dozen folks who have publicly reached out asking for their own brochure. If you’re reading this, Croce, we’ll leave you with this friendly message from @jmlandais:
“You definitely are good at your work. Turned your angst in a great brochure that stroke a nerve. I think you can ask for a raise.”