comedy

If You Grew Up In A Latino Household, You Know These Items Were Never Used For Their Main Purpose

We’ve probably all searched a thing or two in Urban Dictionary to find out what the slang definition is for something. In our culture, there are so many things that have a double meaning, that’s why we created our own version of a slang dictionary with household items. We’re sure a few of these will take you back to your childhood…

When you look up the definition of an oven, you might find something along the lines of: “a kitchen appliance used for cooking and baking.” BUT, in a Latino household, an oven has quite a different meaning…

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

You probably rarely used your mom’s oven to bake because it was already being used… as a storage bin. When was the last time you actually used the oven to bake something?

Even the kitchen sink, which is meant to wash dishes, is actually used by Latino parents to wash something, or someone else…

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

How many of you have pictures of you like the one above? Your mom probably thought you were exactly like washing a dish, except that this dish cries, moves and splashes water at you.

And when it comes to food containers, such as butter, you already know it’s never butter.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

If you had 15 butter containers in your fridge and were looking for actual butter, GOOD LUCK.

Same goes for this Doña María Mole, which you guessed it, also isn’t mole.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

Pretty much any food product that came in a glass container, turned into some sort of cup or Mickey Mouse Tupperware.

So if you ever think that these food items have just one purpose, think again…

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

You were trained to use a tortilla as an eating utensil. This is exactly why some meals are almost impossible to eat without a couple tortillas.

Because even something as small and delicate as an egg, has a much larger and powerful purpose.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

Who knew eggs had so much power, like the power to conquer evil.

And the same goes for quince centerpieces, which might seem harmless, but can lead to drama and disaster.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

If you had more tías than centerpieces, you were asking for trouble.

By now you’ve probably realizing how deceiving Latino household items really are.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

Because if you’re Latino, you know sandals are not just cute summer shoes…HA.

And while all of these different definitions might make things a bit confusing…

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

This is actually genius. Wastes a bunch of energy, but genius idea nonetheless.

…you can also learn A TON from them.

CREDIT: CHRISTINA HENDERSON / WE ARE MITÚ

You couldn’t let kids use the water hose for the entire day, that would defeat the purpose of saving money. But using a hose to cool down during summer days didn’t have a price.

READ: It’s Time To Keep It Real With These 11 Products, And Relabel Them To Reflect What They Actually Do


What other objects in your house have different meanings and purposes? Comment and hit the share button below!

This Woman From NYC Did A ‘Why I’m Single Brochure’ And She Totally Roasted Her Tía

Culture

This Woman From NYC Did A ‘Why I’m Single Brochure’ And She Totally Roasted Her Tía

@melissacroce / Twitter

We all know what it’s like to mentally prepare to see family after you’ve moved away from home. You’re going to hear all of the “ay, que flaquita” and “¿y el novio?” questions all in one breath. Those are just the most common questions. We all know that it never ends there. People are going to ask you about your job a million different ways, and still not get it.

Of course, every single viejo is going to ask you why you’re still single. “Mejor sola que mal acompañada,” so they say. Well, Melissa Croce had a lot more than that to tell her family and her reaction is something that can help all of us get ready for that family reunion.

Melissa Croce wanted to nip all questions in the bud with a handy brochure.

@melissacroce / Twitter

Apparently, it all started as a joke between Croce and her coworkers, but she couldn’t let go of the idea. After you read her brochure, you’ll understand why it’s so cathartic.

“So You Haven’t Seen Melissa Croce in Several Years: A Primer”

Here’s a lil life update on the subject of your chismosando, honey. “She’s beauty and she’s grace. She’ll say it to your face.” Boom. Roasted. Who hasn’t felt the same way when getting ready to see your family?

Croce handily has two separate columns for Job vs New York FAQS.

@melissacroce / Twitter

So many folks had a good laugh at the “Should you, though?” in response to “I should come visit you!” We’ve all braced ourselves through a fake grin answering highly judgmental questions. When they go low, we go high. When they go low, we go high. This brochure is pure low. 😂

You open the brochure to the question of the house: “Why is Melissa Single?”

@melissacroce / Twitter

You can choose whatever adventurous conversation experience you are initiating. What a perfect way to let the family know what they’re getting themselves into by passing judgment on single, working women.

Croce tweeted out her brochure and may have started a new side hustle for herself!

@EM_bolden / Twitter

Follow your passions and everything else will follow. Even though Latinas can all relate to being asked this question, sexism is universal. Croce might have a new career calling!

Even folks are asking for her career advice at this point.

@rheaswriting / Twitter

When you see success, you chase it, right? Croce works for a publishing company but isn’t editing or reading books. She’s marketing children’s books. You know, in case you didn’t read the brochure.

Croce didn’t actually pass out the brochures.

@KelseyMarrujo / Twitter

Of course, one *man* commented that, “The only thing that would be more petty than this would be actually giving it to people at the wedding.”

Croce told Buzzfeed, “I didn’t hand the brochures out! For one thing, I like my cousin, and secondly, I don’t think my aunts and uncles would’ve been too pleased with me if I did — but I did have to answer many of the questions on the brochure, so maybe I should’ve after all!”

One fan took the opportunity to formally ask Croce to be her life coach.

@EmiCalico / Twitter

Croce was surprised to learn how relatable her experience was–“going to a big event and exposing the basics of your life to people who mean well, but are also strangers in many ways.”

She said yes, of course.

@melissacroce / Twitter

We’re glad some folks are appreciating Croce because the sexism hasn’t relented since she tweeted out the brochure. Folks have been telling her, “boo hoo, suck it up,” and “we get it, you’re sexist and hate men.”

Nope. Women expressing their frustration with sexism is not allowed in a patriarchal society, and that’s not stopping anyone.

So many people are taking this brochure to heart and figuring out how they can make it their own.

@little_mswriter / Twitter

Thank you, Croce, and we hope the half dozen folks who have publicly reached out asking for their own brochure. If you’re reading this, Croce, we’ll leave you with this friendly message from @jmlandais:

“You definitely are good at your work. Turned your angst in a great brochure that stroke a nerve. I think you can ask for a raise.”

READ: What To Expect If You’re Introducing Your Novio To The Fam

Dad Jokes Make Us Roll Our Eyes Most Of The Time, But These Will Also Make You Chuckle

Culture

Dad Jokes Make Us Roll Our Eyes Most Of The Time, But These Will Also Make You Chuckle

mitú

Once a year, we get to honor the absolutely ludicrous, outrageously dumb dad jokes that only a Latino padre could concoct. This one goes out to all the dads on Día del Padre for all the truly heroic effort they’ve put into making us smile-grimace.

We love you como nadie.

We’ve figured out the secret to all your jokes, dad.

myrliememes.tumblr.com

Y’all are just twisting words around and we love it. It isn’t situational humor or anything with a super long backstory. Hard punches that are so dumb you feel fooled.

You have to say some of these out loud.

Credit: mitú

The best jokes are the ones that are so dumb it takes us a couple of times to get it. But when we do… 😂

Luckily, one Spanish word has 47 different meanings.

langfordays.tumblr.com

That’s why Latino dad jokes are the best dad jokes. The language is basically built for you guys to twist our arms.

Back in 2003, you really got into the “Soy” jokes.

Credit: mitú

Like, “What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself?” Yeah, yeah, we get it. Bilingual jokes are the best.

Just say it out loud… slowly.

We’re not sure when you all started learning how to meme, but it’s slowing us down. Thank you for that. 🙂 

If your mom and dad could create a meme it would look like this:

Credit: mitú

Mama out here trying to prove her point and dad backing her up with the dad jokes. This is every Latino family dynamic, right?

This *terrible* joke that was said at every family gathering from 2001-2011.

@spookyboricua / Twitter

It’s a vintage dad joke. It has a different shine on it now.

Still, so bad.

Thank you to the dad who provided a key to his dad joke.

spanishskulduggery.tumblr.com

Other dads, take note. If you were raised Catholic, you already had they key brainwashed into you during all twelve years of CCD classes.

Dad joke of the year:

@lilJuanJuan98 / Twitter

Wait for it… wait for it… 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

This isn’t a joke. We know you’re all dead serious when the “tu sabes lo que dicen” comes out.

@cinemasbabe / Twitter

Sorry Jade, we might all consider the ends of those sentences a joke, but our dads ain’t playing. Hope this made a hard-working comedian of a dad laugh a little. We love you.

READ: These Latinos Are Dropping Some Amazing Jokes On Twitter And They Need To Be Acknowledged

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