Things That Matter

Someone Created America’s Scariest Teddy Bear: The Trumpy Bear

There is a Trump Bear because Republicans are weird and some seem to straight up hate children (they put them in cages, remember). Staring into the abyss of Trump Bear, all I can hear are the haunting lyrics of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town.” You know the ones: “He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake.” 

While I am sure this bear is fitted with a listening device from the NSA, I am even more certain that instead of a lump of coal, Santa Claus gives you one of these for being a naughty kid. 

My first sentence ever, according to my mother was, “Mommy, the dolly killed the lady.” My mother, who loves horror movies, didn’t think it was a big deal to show me a Chucky film when I was 2 years old, but that’s another story. Here I am, on the cusp of turning 30 and all I can say when I look at Trump bear is, “Mommy, the dolly killed this ladySee you in hell. Don’t forget to water my plants while I’m gone!”  

Meet Trumpy Bear

The brown bear made in Donald Trump’s image sadly is still the most attractive version of Donald Trump. Although, as an Afro-Latinx I can only help but snicker because you know Trumpito has always wanted to be black. It’s apparent in his decade-long fixation with President Obama. If it’s not jealously, then why is this racist so obsessed with one-upping and undoing Obama’s successes

Trumpy Bear has a hideous blond combover (accurate), hideous bushy blond eyebrows (accurate), an inappropriately large tie to conceal his misshapen body (accurate), eyes as blue as Adolf Hitler’s dream Nazi (accurate), and a face made for the ninth circle of hell (accurate). The only thing inaccurate is that the hands are proportional to the body, and we all know Trumpito has teeny tiny hands only slightly larger than his brain. I’ll leave descriptions of the size of his other body parts up to my girl, Stormy Daniels. 

But we haven’t gotten to the creepiest part of all. When you unzip his back, you can pull out an American flag blanket. As Vogue writer Michelle Ruiz put it, the flag is “perfect for watching the president mock sexual assault survivors on national television or, according to the official Trumpy commercial, serving as a hood ornament on your golf cart.” Enjoy!

Is Trump Bear real? 

Upon its launch, many wondered if Trumpy Bear was real? Snopes did some investigating and discovered that for two payments of $19.95 + shipping and handling, you can actually purchase this bear to burn in your local bonfire. According to Snopes, the product trademark is owned by Exceptional Products (“Exceptional,” OK. SureJan.gif) which Snopes uncovered by searching U.S. Patent and Trademark Office records. 

Several social media posts revealed that some people unironically and willingly received Trumpy Bears as gifts. Imagine if your workplace secret Santa gave you this? I would go to HR. 

But we haven’t even gotten to the craziest part yet. There is a commercial. The gift that keeps on giving… me ominous flashes of the looming apocalypse. 

Trumpy Bear Official Commercial

If you’re still alive after watching that commercial, I assume anyone who watches it will die within seven days, you might find many things odd about it. For starters, this teddy bear is clearly being marketed to adults over 50? In an advertisement for a stuffed animal, there is not a child in sight. The commercial says Trumpy Bear is great for the front of your motorcycle, the back of your golf cart, and to honor fallen soldiers who probably died because of his policies. 

A try-hard male voiceover says, “Even the toughest guys will love Trumpy Bear,” because you know, asserting “masculinity” is so important for Trump supporters who are categorically a part of the demographic where the Venn diagram for “Rape Apologist” and “Viagra User” is just one circle. 

Trumpy Bear for true patriots

The bear also suggests that it will help you “show your patriotism.” This is coming from the same people who convinced themselves the previous President was the secret leader of ISIS just because he was half black — true patriots of American values.

But I would argue the commercial is right, there is nothing more patriotic in America than spending money on a product you don’t need, manufactured by poor people of color overseas, to remind the poor people of color where you live that you hate them so much you would waste money, destroy the environment, and hurt people. Perhaps, the only bigger patriot is the person selling the symbol of hate. 

Two Housekeepers Exposed Trump’s Hotels For Hiring Undocumented Immigrants

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Two Housekeepers Exposed Trump’s Hotels For Hiring Undocumented Immigrants

Sandra Diaz

Two of Donald Trump’s former personal housekeepers exposed the president’s company Trump Organization, which he still owns, as employing dozens of undocumented immigrants. Sandra Diaz and Victorina Morales told reporters that many of Trump’s properties employ undocumented workers for exploitatively low pay and long hours.

The Washington Post spoke with 48 undocumented immigrants who worked at 11 of Donald Trump’s hotels and resorts in Florida, New Jersey, and Virginia. 

Diaz and Morales felt compelled to speak, as Trump’s damning rhetoric against undocumented immigrants became public discourse.

“How can you know something so big, how someone — who goes on national television and says something — and you know it’s not true,” Diaz said. “Whether it’s the president or not, you have the responsibility to say no. To pass through this barrier of fear and say no.”

When Trump began espousing increasingly virulent views on Latinxs and immigrants, the undocumented workers at his hotels and resorts began to feel the ire at work.

“The worry among the kitchen staff at BLT Prime, the hotel’s restaurant, was serious enough that a week before Trump took office, undocumented employees met with a manager to say they could not continue to come to work because they didn’t have legal documents and feared deportation,” according to the Washington Post

Trump’s referrals to Mexicans as rapists and criminals and the implication of a Latinx invasion left his employees apprehensive. The golf-playing clientele of Trump’s resorts would take on the president’s points of view when they interacted with the undocumented staff. 

“You’re still here? How come we can’t get rid of you? I’m going to call Trump, you [expletive] Mexican,” Gabriel Juarez, a former head waiter at one of Trump’s New York golf clubs, said a member told him.

Trump, their own employer was advocating for policies that he himself was violating and that was putting their lives at risk. Some employees even started to distance themselves because of the politically hostile environment. 

“I didn’t feel comfortable working over there. That atmosphere. A lot of conservative people talking about abortion or gay marriage,” said the anonymous former employee. “I got kind of tired of all these anti-immigration [events].”

Morales says she became afraid to work there because she feared violence.

The intensity increased with housekeepers noticing both hostilities towards immigrants and Trump. They found anti-Trump messaging vandalizing the mirrors of the men’s locker room. In one instance, there was even a hanged Trump doll in a stall. 

“It made me afraid,” Morales said. “We began to wonder: What if someone comes and puts a bomb in here?”

Morales who migrated from Guatemala didn’t want to stand up against her boss who was now the most powerful man in the United States, but she could see how quickly and how badly things could be. 

While Diaz was able to become a permanent resident, Morales has not. Despite efforts from a lawyer to protect Morales and other undocumented employees from being deported because they were material witnesses in a possible federal crime, they were not granted protected status. With little other options, the two turned to the press. 

No one has been deported because of the two housekeepers, yet many of the undocumented workers who are still employed by Trump resent the pair. When the news broke there was a company-wide audit of employees. Trump Organization fired at least 18 people because of their immigration status, workers who spoke to the Washington Post said it was closer to 30 or 40. 

“I also worked there a long time without papers but the most incredible thing is to see how people, when they have papers, forget how they got here,” Antonio Zuñiga, a former Trump employee, wrote on Facebook. “I’m sorry but people like you Doña Sandra have forgotten their principles.”

Trump all but blanketly admits that his properties employ undocumented immigrants.

“Well, that I don’t know. Because I don’t run it,” Trump told reporters when asked if Trump Organization employed undocumented immigrants in July. “But I would say this: Probably every club in the United States has that, because it seems to me, from what I understand, a way that people did business.”

However, in the article many of the undocumented workers said they personally met Trump. When the Washington Post reached out for comment about the allegations from the workers, the press secretary vaguely denied all of the claims. 

“The assertions made for this story are not only false, they are a disgusting attempt at invading the privacy of the First Family,” White House press secretary Stephanie Grisham told the Washington Post. “This is not journalism — it is fabricated tabloid trash.”

Morales has since applied for asylum in the United States. She and Diaz are actively mobilizing against Trump’s re-election campaign. 

“We are here to show our faces not just for ourselves, but for the 11 million [undocumented] immigrants who are here in the country,” Morales said at a Trump rally in Orlando, Florida. 

Trump Tried To Bully Kamala Harris And She Clapped Back In The Most Hilarious Way Possible

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Trump Tried To Bully Kamala Harris And She Clapped Back In The Most Hilarious Way Possible

Kamala Harris / Instagram

P1: Kamala Harris may be out of the race, but that doesn’t mean she’s going to stay quiet. On Tuesday, the former Democratic Presidential Nominee clapped back on Instagram to a tweet Trump had aimed at her. The tough-as-nails former prosecutor has never been one to mince words when it comes to confronting bullies and haters. Who could forget that epic showdown she had with the snarky college student who asked her about gun control? But this time, Harris’s wrath is aimed at a more powerful for: the president. 

After announcing the suspension of her 2020 bid for the Democratic presidential nomination, Trump took to Twitter to lob a gloating comments Harris’s way. “Too bad,” he said. “We will miss you Kamala!”. Harris, for her part, wasted no time showing the president who’s boss. “Don’t worry, Mr. President,” she replied. “I’ll see you at your trial.”

Naturally, the internet exploded in glee over Harris’s quick-witted response.

As of Thursday, Harris’s viral tweet has racked up over 186,000 retweets, 44,000 comments and a whopping one million likes. Supporters and fans alike commented on her post with compliments like:”Best tweet ever” and “Omg the shade”. So, although many are disappointed that the once-front runner nominee of the Democratic primary will no longer be on the ballot, many are at least comforted by knowing that she has retained her trademark sense of humor

What’s not a laughing matter, however, is the trial that Harris was referring to. After Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi confirmed that the the House had “no choice” but to move forward with articles of impeachment, the House Judiciary Committee announced that its next impeachment hearing will be on December 9th. This comes after the The House Judiciary Committee released a 300-page report that detailed the relationship between Trump and Ukraine. So, as of now, Trump is on track to be the third president in the history of the United States to be impeached. 

The House has concluded that Trump, in the words of Pelosi, has “abused his power for his own personal political benefit at the expense of our national security by withholding military aid and a crucial Oval Office meeting in exchange for an announcement of an investigation into his political rival”. The political rival was Vice President Joe Biden, whom Trump viewed as a threat to his upcoming presidential campaign. 

Although Harris’s clap-back was funny, her withdrawal is still a loss for the presidential nominee pool that now falls woefully short on candidates of color. 

Harris, with her stellar resume, has long been a shining star in the Democratic Party. Not only was she both the first African-American and first woman to serve as California’s Attorney General, but she was also first South Asian-American and second African-American woman to serve in the Senate in US history. In other words: she is well-qualified to take on any job she tackles.

Both presidential candidates Cory Booker and Julian Castro blame the Democratic National Committee for not throwing their support behind candidates of color in the same way they do with white candidates. As of now, the DNC’s lineup of debate participants (and therefore more publicity), are all white: Amy Klobuchar, Tom Steyer, Joe Biden, Pete Buttigieg, Elizabeth Warren, and Bernie Sanders. “What message is that sending, that we heralded the most diverse field in our history, and now we’re seeing people like her dropping out of this campaign?” Booker told Politico. “Voters did not determine her destiny.” 

As for now, it’s nice to get some comfort from Harris’s unparalled talent at confronting bullies.

When Americans are forced to deal with realities as depressing as the 2020 campaign, you can’t blame them from grasping onto what little entertainment is presented to them.

This Twitter user thinks that Harris’s comeback was step above the usual “shade” throwing.

We’ll remember this description for later. 

This person believes that Harris should win an award for her clap-back.

We would love to be able to hand her a medal for this shade. 

This person kindly pointed out whose tweet had the more likes and retweets–despite Trump having 67 million followers compared to Harris’s 3 million followers.

You might even venture to think that Harris’s followers are more passionate than Trump’s. Hmm…

This man is a man of few words, but we concur with his sentiment

As always, we stan a queen. And Kamala Harris is definitely one of them. We’re pretty sure she’ll continue to serve the American people for a long time to come.