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These 20 Pieces of Dating Advice from my Latina Mother Shaped My Love Life

Navigating the dating world is tough on your own. Thank the Lord for our Latina moms that shower us with (mostly) sound advice. The trick to this advice is following it without becoming a mojigato. I  remember my mom singing the praises of Bibaporu whenever we felt ill as kids. Now, when my boyfriend is sick I take care of him with this magical formula. Maybe my mom was on to something. Here are some other tidbits of advice I’ve received over the years from my beloved mama.

Leave the Pursuing to Him

Credit: Twitter @Godlycourting

It is true that women are equal to men. However, there’s something honorable in the old-fashioned nature of a man asking you out. As much as you may like him, don’t ask him out. Cojetocon take it easy. Show your interest in subtle ways and let him handle the rest. This could set the tone for the entire relationship.

Embrace Your Sexuality, but Maintain Your Modesty

Credit: Instagram @mpalafox15

Ask anyone to describe Latina women and the most common word you may hear is “sexy”. My mom taught me that every Latina women has a fiery vixen(her words, not mine) inside of them. The secret of embracing this power lies in reigning the beast. You should strive to catch a man’s attention without letting it all hang out. Show him a hint of skin without ruining the impression that he can take you home to mom.

Always Wear High Heels

Credit: @danteov_seen

High heels will forever be a Latina’s best friend. My mom practically taught me to walk as a toddler in heels. In her opinion, they are the finishing touch on the perfect date night outfit.  My mom also told me to never date a man who ended up shorter than me while wearing my heels–or, at the very least, never date a man who has a PROBLEM with being shorter than me in my heels.

Highlight Your Coqueta Side–but Don’t Go Overboard

Credit: Twitter @FanMeagan

Men love a woman with confidence. However, there is a fine line between confident and cocky. My mom taught me to never hold myself above others. We are all equals. With this in mind, you should know your strengths and play them to your advantage. Show off your assets(but never your ass).

Give Your Fierce Love Only to Those that Deserve It

Credit: @lauramtipper

I learned from my mom that part of being Latina is loving deeply with a burning passion. There’s no doubt this keeps things interesting, but it’s important to slow down these instincts in the beginning stages of a relationship. You don’t want to drive them away, or worse–allow them to take advantage of your love. It is something that should be cherished and given away only when you determine the person is worth it. How do you determine this? By judging what their actions tell you.

Contain Your Crazy

Credit: Twitter @Fresh_Logic

Along with a Latina’s fiery, passionate love, comes a trait some may refer to as… crazy(Hey, there is such a thing as a good kind of crazy!). Every Latina has a slightly loco side. The trick is to contain it in order to nail a great first impression. If you let it out too soon, your man may end up running for the hills.

Wear Makeup, But Not Too Much

Credit: @haleyriv Haley Rivera

Makeup is a first date essential, but it’s important to not go overboard. Sure, you want him to see your bombshell self, but my momma taught me to think about the first morning spent together (“After the wedding, right nina?” she’d say). The last thing you want your man to be is shocked by your au natural face. A little correction and enhancement here and there never hurt, but make sure you’re recognizable.

Brush Up On Your Salsa Skills

Credit: @scottbroomephotography

This advice could apply to both men and women. Dancing is such an important part of courtship for Latinos. Practice your skills regularly to avoid embarrassment and impress your date.  In my experience it is a fantastic way to bond with your partner and get back in touch with your Spanish roots. Time to hit up that salsa club!

Practice Your Cooking Skills

Credit: Twitter @Nervousjr

My mom taught me everything she knows in the kitchen(once I was an adult and could appreciate it). Even though I believe cooking is in my blood, I had to practice regularly to enhance my skill set. What better motivation to practice than the opportunity to eat delicious food? My mom taught me to never be the type of woman who just serves confle for a meal(THE HORROR). There’s no better music to a Latina’s ears than hearing her man say, “Estay full.”

Always Keep a Clean House

Credit: Twitter @BigDaddyCane420

My mother remains infamous in my mind as the only person I know who hates candles. In her opinion, the singular way to make a home smell good is to keep it clean. Cooking and cleaning go hand in hand in proving you are “wife” material. Plus, keeping your house tidy relieves any stress of unannounced boyfriend or family visits.

Impress His Family

Credit: @mendesvtop

It’s commonly known when you date a Latino, you are dating his family. Don’t shy away from them and do your best to make a good first impression when you are introduced. Smile often and be genuine. If you happen to get a stamp of approval from his mom, well, the rest of the relationship will be smooth sailing.

Show Off Your Partner

Credit: Shelby Miller @ shelbsmiller

Your boyfriend may see your fiery, passionate side, but does the rest of the world? While I’m not advising for a public make-out session at every opportunity, it’s important the world sees how lucky you are. Show your boyfriend you are proud to be with him.

Embrace Your Faith

Credit: Ben White @benwhitephotography

Having common religious goals is important in any long term relationship. It provides an important foundation to build values on. The religion talk is not one to have on the first date, but it is important to discuss before things turn serious.

Speak Your Mind…

Credit: Christin Hume @Christinhumephotography

There are few and far between Latinas that have trouble expressing how they feel. Don’t shy away from your feelings. The right partner especially will honor them and do everything to make you happy.

…But Don’t Be Afraid to Compromise.

Credit: Twitter @JustinGuarini

It is one of the most important parts of any relationship. Be careful to control your stubborn attitude and bend on any minor disagreements that won’t matter in the long run. Your relationship will strengthen from these tests.

Balance Your Relationship and Your Friends

Credit: Twitter @omgrelatable

My mom always stressed the importance of never dumping friends for a guy. During the initial phase, of course, you and your man are going to be slightly obsessed with each other and wanting to spend every waking moment together, but resist the urge. You may need your friends later on(of course, you will need them anyway where you get married or not–

Growing up, I also heard some advice from my mom to my brothers about dating.

Don’t Let Your Machismo Take Over

Credit: Mike Fox @thefoxicon

Sure, it’s important for men to protect their loved ones–but never to the point it becomes degrading. My mom used to say, “Be sure you are thinking with the head that is ON YOUR SHOULDERS.”

Take Care of Your Car

Credit: Clement M @cmreflections

A Latino’s car is the chariot for his dates, and he will forever be judged by the look of it. Keep it clean and working well so it doesn’t give you a bad name.

Treat Her Like a Princesa 

Credit: Twitter @RichardTorres

Don’t be afraid to show your girl how you truly feel about her. Any woman loves to be spoiled, whether it be through gifts, attention, or acts of service. Don’t ever let her stop feeling appreciated.

Finally, the last piece of advice is one I think we should all hold dear:

Be Proud of Your Heritage

Credit: Twitter @sincerelyjexi

Embrace your Latina side and never let anyone dull your pride. They are eternally lucky to be dating you!

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Women Are Sharing The Moments That Made Them Walk Out On Bad Dates— ‘He brought his mom’

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Women Are Sharing The Moments That Made Them Walk Out On Bad Dates— ‘He brought his mom’

There’s a case to be made about being on a Bad Date.

While never ideal, even in the best of bad date scenarios, oftentimes when we spin the experiences on their heads we can remind ourselves that behind every bad one is a lesson. Whether it’s how to avoid them in the future, or the discovery of a really great new restaurant, sometimes they can have their upsides.

Women on Reddit are sharing one of the ultimate upsides of a bad date: regaining power. From the moment you realize you’re on a date to the second you decide to get up and walk out, always remember you’ve got the power.

“This was a blind date with some guy a friend arranged. We we’re like 15 minutes into our date when he said (in exactly this order) that he ‘likes to eat asses, lick feet and if this is going to be serious you really need to lose weight’. I wanted to leave the date as soon as he said that when he suddenly demanded that I drive him home because he didn’t have a car and used the train to get there. I told him that my car wouldn’t be able to move with 2 fatties in it and drove home.”- bincsi182

“We met at a park for our first date and he was definitely giving off weird vibes. Within a half hour, he asked if I’d give him a blow job. Right there in the middle of the park. I said no, there’s people around and I just met you. His next idea was to go in the men’s bathroom and asked if I’d do it there. I said sure you go in and I’ll follow a couple minutes later so it doesn’t look suspicious. Once he walked in the bathroom, I quickly found my car and left his horny a**.” –CrazyCabinet577

“This was a long time ago before I began dating my now husband. I was about a year into my recovery from alcoholism and went on a dinner date at a restaurant with a guy who I’d warned I was a recovering alcoholic and who had claimed to be supportive.

When the waitress came he ordered a bottle of wine and a Manhattan. I ordered a tonic with a lime wedge. He told the waitress not to bring my drink because he ordered the wine for both of us. I told her “I don’t drink, please bring what I ordered.” He sat back and expelled air through his nose. I was turned off but figured maybe he forgot, so I politely reminded him.

When the drinks came, he poured a splash of his Manhattan into my alcohol-free drink with a smirk and told me to “lighten up.” I put $10 on the table, grabbed my coat and purse, and left while he begged me “don’t do this to me…it was a joke.”

He called me and left phone messages for a couple months, oscillating between groveling and angrily admonishing me for embarrassing him and/or breaking his heart.”- mysticpudding

“A panic attack. It was a month after my dad died, and it suddenly hit me that I shouldn’t be dating. I said I was going to the bathroom, ran to my car, and left. I messaged him and apologized, and he was super nice and understanding. And anyway we’re still together now.”- Sensitiverock85

“I don’t have just 1; I have several. These are all different guys from different dates…

  1. One looked NOTHING like his profile pics. Way chubbier, teeth were awful, and just NO.
  2. One told me he would like to breed with me immediately to save the Arian race (we are both blonde with blue eyes).
  3. One asked me if I was ever with a black guy because if I was, he would not tolerate it “as my vagina is now loose from the sex”.
  4. One brought his 3 year old kid along (his dating app said he had no kids…)
  5. One was texting on his phone the entire time.
  6. One just NEVER showed up so I had to leave.

I’ve been on hundreds of dates so I have way more, but these were the main weirdos I’ll never forget…”-Chuck2025

“You had so much bad luck and more guts than any of us to leave just like that, i would just try to get an excuse to leave then ghost him afterwards. For the first one, thats why i always look if they have pictures smilling, you honestly cant know how a person really is irl until you actually see them smiling. For the 4, god ive seen so many guys literally having their profile pic with their own child it disgusted me, just say you have a kid and move on. For 5 i would say to anyone who does that to you, you should leave.”-mjigs

“I worked at a university summer program and many people were from out of state. They held 10 day programs and I got to know a variety of cool people. This one guy asked me to dinner towards the end of his program and I accepted. I was 22. He was slightly older-30-31? He made a big show of ordering the damn wine and appetizers and being wealthy and I was already regretting it but I thought-free meal-WTF-so I excused myself and went to the restroom and slipped out to catch a buzz. Once I returned he was arguing with the waiter about the oysters and the waiter rolled his eyes and said he would get them fresh and this guy winked at me like he was tHE SHIT! anyway I was chatting away and he interrupted me twice to point out I had said words ending in ” ing” and had not fully pronounced the “hard g” and said ” it makes you look uneducated”. I just stared at him and he asked where I had grown up and where I had gone to school and I said ” Harlem and …” I was about to state my other school in East Manhattan and he dismissed me, saying ” enough said”. Then he goes ” But you’re white, correct?
I looked at all of the food and chugged my wine, poured another glass of it and chugged that and slightly belched and said ” enjoy the food.”- Bigfukkendeal

“This is all one guy on the same first date… there’s a part of me that wondered if I stayed the 45 minutes that I did just to see how bad it could get lol. TLDR: he was a very cringey incel.

  • Showed up 10 minutes late to what was supposed to be just a short coffee date
  • Tried to make a joke about how he hoped we weren’t related when he found out both our moms are Japanese but the delivery was real awkward
  • Boasted about how he was in the military during “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” and would have proved to a military court he wasn’t gay by eating out one of the female officers on the spot
  • Randomly launched into a completely unprompted story about how when he was in his early teens, his friend’s older sister and her friends pressured him into jerking off into a pill bottle in front of them. He sounded proud about it.
  • Made comments about how if he couldn’t find a girl to realise what a good guy he was and marry him, there’s just no point in living in a city with women with such low IQ
  • Followed me to my car and stood behind it so I couldn’t leave and then asked me to rate how badly the date went (I was honest)
  • And to top it all off, the next day, he text me (I honestly thought I was clear about how bad the date went and just deleted his number but didn’t block it) saying “do you like Vietnamese food? We could get PhoKing!” with a winking face.

I blocked him at that point. I swear it was like he watched some guys with natural swagger and charm use joking lines or cocky comments and still get girls and then figured he could get away with it too.”- dragons_and_sandals

“He texted me from the bathroom “sorry babe, I’m still stuck at work but I’ll be home ASAP”… obviously for his girlfriend. I was gone before he got back to the table.”- mediumsizedbootyjudy

“When I (27F) was about 22 I went on a date with a guy that was a few years older than I was. We went out to a bar and the conversation very quickly became about his career and his father’s career (both doctors). He started to talk about his fathers belief that Australia should medically disable Aboriginal women from having children as they are not fit for parenting and would be a good way to phase Aboriginal people out… He strongly agreed with his fathers ideals and as soon as I realised he was not joking I grabbed my bag, slapped him across the face, called him a pig and left… Mind blowing that there are people out there like this that exist.”- Bec_Drayton

“Once had guy walk out on me, shouting “I can’t listen to this!” when I said to him that I thought he was racist for saying “child abuse is part of Aboriginal culture.” I now low key regret not slapping him….”- sarahgrey64

“Smdh Dude I have been there except he asked me to sum up all my details in a quick spew, I did and then said alright now you go! He dead ass said, “well there’s not much to tell ya kno?” When I tried asking individual questions he just tried to change the subject… after the 4th question I picked up my Starbucks and started walking away. He asked where was I going, and I just replied “there’s not too much to tell ya kno” and left.”- MsBlis

“I was 20 & went out with my boss, who I’d had a crush on for a while. He was twice my age, funny, tall, and the general manager of a pizza restaurant where I waitressed. It was a casual hang out without expectations on my end. I was not very experienced and I always have been a time taker in relationships.

While driving me home after what must have been dinner that Ive now forgotten, he shared that his wife, the mother of his four children, had died in a car crash. Also that he was the driver & was found to be at fault…he was intoxicated and drove them straight into a wall. He said his entire face had been reconstructed and that he was dating because he needed a mom for his four kids. I was like,
‘I am 20, how old is your oldest kid?’ He was like ’17.’ If I could have vanished right then I would have. We pulled into my driveway and he wanted to make out. I didn’t dare say I wasn’t into it, so I gave him a nervous kiss and said I was tired and done for the night.

He asked to use my bathroom. I was sitting on my futon waiting for him, when he came out and plopped right down next to me. My normally sweet, friendly cat suddenly growled and hissed at him defensively. It was so strange and out of character for the cat that I started paying closer attention to my surroundings.

My date definitely seemed weird now. I had just one room and a bathroom so I went in the bathroom to think of how to get him out of there —my bathroom smelled like burnt plastic. My cat was going ape shit so I used that excuse to ask him to leave, which he did. Later I found out that smell was crack. We didn’t go out again.”- spandexcatsuit

“I was on a date, and while we were just meeting up and talking, he was still on Tinder looking at other future women. Rude! I literally left a few minutes after talking.”- coimas

“I went out with a guy once and things went really well. afterwards, we were sitting in my car talking and i mentioned that my dad was gay. he told me that i ‘should’ve disowned him.’ i told him to get the fuck out of my car and never speak to me again.” –nopenonotatall

“Right after he went down a dark and spiteful rant about how women in the city were shallow and petty for not wanting to date him (5’5”). He was so smart and so charming and women just couldn’t understand him. Major red pill, ‘woe is me,’ misogynist vibes. Told him we wouldn’t work out, grabbed my coat, and left.”- takemeup-castmeaway

“Roofies. I got up to go to the bathroom mid-(first) drink on a first date in a casual bar I’m familiar with close to my apartment at the time. Date was fine, nor great, but not terrible. When I got back, he told me to “finish my drink and order us another round” while he went to the restroom. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but had a couple sips of my beer and motioned to the bartender to order another round. Bartender then gives me a glass of water and tells me I should leave. When I asked why, he said a girl nearby just approached him and told him she saw my date put something into my beer. I totally panicked. I handed him a $20 (which he didn’t want to take but I was so freaked out) and left. I barely remember anything after that. It was 3/4 of a beer at most. I blocked the guy the next day when I woke up to 17 missed calls and about 40 texts asking why I felt the need to leave when “we were totally vibing”.

LADIES- watch your drinks on dates. Even when you are an older 20-something meeting for a “quick drink” after work, this can happen. Thank god someone was looking out for me that day.”- CHRGON_FEF_NYC

“This guy was a total catfish, but I was nice about it. He kept cussing during the first twenty minutes and it made me uncomfortable, so after the first drink, I decided to go… he asked me for feedback on his dating profile, and I told him all of his pictures had other people in it and it was hard to discern which he was. So. He asked me to look at a picture his friend sent him. He pulled up the conversation in the iPhone, then clicked the media and there were a bunch of vaginas. Like an endless thumbnail stream of vaginas in different sizes and colors. I was like, ‘yeah, I’m gonna go…’”- Allupinyourface

“Went on a brief date with a guy I met at work. It went ok until he told me that he has a demon that lives on his shoulder, and if he can picture someone’s face perfectly in his head after they meet, it meant they were evil. He said he could sorta remember mine.. I said I had to go, but he asked for a ride home. When we got to his house I dodged a kiss, and he still had the balls to look me in the eye, put a hand on my leg, and said we should have sex. It felt like he was trying to fucking hypnotize me. Dodged those calls for a while.”-CeladonToast

“It started when he said that any adult should be able to buy any type of gun. Machine guns and all. Reason? Farmers need to shoot them wild pigs. From there I tried to gently guide him to realize how insane that is. I kept the conversation pretty reasonable. But I was thinking that I was never going to talk to this guy again. It came to the point where I could tell he wasn’t listening to me, lights on no one home. I stared him down in silence for about 2 seconds and then zoomed my ass outta there. No goodbye. I left him there with our drinks/bill so he couldn’t follow me. At that point there was no reason to stay. He texted me on my way home and said, “had a good time we should try this again sometime”. I was surprised he didnt get the glaring hint. But also not too surprised because he obviously lacked any critical thinking skills.”-ghostofaflower

“I left* a date after he dumped his full beer over my head as “a joke.” *I didn’t leave the bar, because I was already out, looking cute (before he dumped his beer on me) and DTF. So I went solo for the rest of the night and wound up having mine with a different guy who was better looking than him anyways. His loss.”- supersarah1010

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9 Essential Items For First-Time Moms

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9 Essential Items For First-Time Moms

With the quarantine baby boom, it’s likely that you’ve got at least one new mama on your Mother’s Day gift list this year! If you’re last minute shopping for the mamas in your life, we’ve got your back! Recently we checked in with the mitú staff about firs time mom essentials and got the best responses that were also pretty obvious.

Check them out below!

Burp Cloths

Grow by Gerber Store

Get them here for $9.99

Bibs

 Simka Rose Store

Get them here for $19.98

Pre-done Swaddles (featuring velcro)

upsimples Store

Get them here for $9.99

Windy

FridaBaby Store

Get it here for $12.74

Gloves for babies

American Trends

Get them here for $7.99

Diaper Geenie

GROWNSY Store

Get them here for $29.99

High Contrast Black and White Baby Books

Wee Gallery Store

Get some here for $15.99

Babysitter Giftcards

PickMe

Make your own!

Get materials here for $29.95

Snot Suckers

Watolt

Get them here for $39.99

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