Things That Matter

Daughter Shows What It’s Like To Live With A Mother That Is A Hoarder And Verbally Abusive

Dealing with aging parents is a struggle that is real and all too painful. Many children of parents who suffer from mental disorders, or can’t move around as quickly because of their age, have the challenging task of either caring for them at home or placing them into a convalescent home.

For Latinos, however, the struggle of aging parents has its unique challenges which are often related to cultures that demand children taking on the role of their parents’ caretakers in their later years.

Recently, one Latina learned that taking care of her mother is not what she expected.

A Mexican woman shared on Facebook the struggles of living with a mom that horde just about everything.

The woman posted her feelings on a Facebook group titled “Awful roommates: roommates from hell” and said that she arrived at her mom’s house only to find items all over the place. From bags to rotten food, the mom’s house was cluttered with junk.

The woman said that she had just been to her mom’s house to clean four days prior only to find it an utter mess.

According to the Daily Mail, the woman said, “Most of my money goes to rent and bills, and I’m saving the residual to move out hopefully soon.” It looks like the stress of taking care of her mom has become too much of a problem for her, and now she’s seeking to leave her mom and take care of herself.

It also seems as if the mom is mentally abusing her daughter as well.

The woman claims her mom became verbally volatile after she messed up one of her pans while she was cleaning.

“After all this, my mom came into the kitchen and threatened to release my pet bird outside because I scratched her pan when I was cleaning it so I can learn to take care of things better.”

The people in the group were on her side and expressed comments of concern and well wishes.

“This is exactly why I haven’t lived at home since I was 14,” one person wrote. “Moms like this are awful. We love them, but they’re toxic.”

The publication reports that a commenter said, “I’m sorry you’re going through this. I hope it works out in your favor soon.”

“Mommy dearest! I hope you can cope, this sounds so very hard on you,” a commentator said.

It will be interesting to see how this situation plays out, but we can certainly say it won’t be easy.

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It Turns Out Your Underwear Might Have An Expiration Date (!)

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It Turns Out Your Underwear Might Have An Expiration Date (!)

Nicholas Hunt / Getty

When it comes to being strict about “sell by” and expiration dates, you might think that you only have to be concerned about the perishables in your refrigerator. However, as it turns out, the time runs out on quite a few of the items you have in your dresser as well. That could potentially include your underwear. That’s right, a recent piece published by Refinery29 has revealed that the thongs, boxers, boy shorts, and panties you have, might need to be tossed out after a certain amount of time.

Speaking to Dr. Philip M. Tierno, a professor of microbiology and pathology at the New York University School of Medicine, Refinery found that “there’s about one-tenth of a gram of poop in the average pair of ‘clean’ underwear.”

Yuck, right?

According to Tierno, “washing machines may not kill all the organisms.”

Speaking about underwear, Tierno says there’s no germ-related reason to toss out old underwear as long as you’re washing it regularly and after every use. “As long as you’re washing and disinfecting your underwear, and they’re mechanically functional, with no holes, and they’re not soiled, you can keep those,” Tierno explained. “When they become frayed or the elastic stops working, you’ll know to replace them.”

The inoculum effect, which means it takes a certain amount of organisms to cause an infection,” he went onto explain. “Your machine won’t leave behind enough microbes to create a problem for you, Tierno says. If you want to be extra careful, disinfect your washing machine by running a bleach cycle with no clothes on a monthly basis, to make sure it’s not collecting extra bacteria, he recommends.”

Tierno pointed out that to properly clean your underwear you should toss them in a washing machine with a detergent that contains peroxide.

Tierno says that you should check the label of your underwear to find out the hottest setting to wash your clothing.

“Washing machines may not kill all the organisms, but there’s another phenomenon, the inoculum effect, which means it takes a certain amount of organisms to cause and infection,” he explained. “Your machine won’t leave behind enough microbes to create a problem for you, Tierno says. If you want to be extra careful, disinfect your washing machine by running a bleach cycle with no clothes on a monthly basis, to make sure it’s not collecting extra bacteria, he recommends.”

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Michelle Obama Says That She Has ‘Low-Grade Depression’

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Michelle Obama Says That She Has ‘Low-Grade Depression’

Scott Olson / Getty

Since leaving her life in the White House, former first lady Michelle Obama has been unabashedly open about her personal life. From writing about her marriage in her recent book Becoming to speaking out about our current president, Obama is unleashing her truth in so many ways. Recently, she revealed during an episode of her podcast that, like most of us, she’s been dealing with “some form of low-grade depression” thanks in part to recent events.

During last week’s Wednesday episode of her eponymous podcast, Obama talked with journalist Michele Norris about her mental health saying “Barack and I, we’ve lived outside of the norm of regular life for quite some time, and what we learned early on in the White House is — in order to stay sane and feel like the human that you once were — is that you have to have a schedule and a routine.”

Speaking out about her current mental state Obama revealed that she has struggled to keep up with her usual regimen. 

“I’m waking up in the middle of the night, ‘cause I’m worried about something or there’s a heaviness,” she explained. “I try to make sure I get a workout in. Although there have been periods throughout this quarantine where I just have felt too low.”

“It is unusual,” Obama went on. “And it’s a direct result of being out of body, out of mind. Spiritually, these are not fulfilling times. I know that I am dealing with some form of low-grade depression. Not just because of the quarantine, but because of the racial strife, and just seeing this administration, watching the hypocrisy of it, day in and day out, is dispiriting.”

Later on in the podcast, Obama explained she’d “be remiss to say that part of this depression is also a result of what we’re seeing in terms of the protests, the continued racial unrest, that has plagued this country since its birth. I have to say that waking up to the news, waking up to how this administration has or has not responded, waking up to yet another story of a Black man or a Black person somehow being dehumanized, or hurt, or killed, or falsely accused of something, it is exhausting. And it has led to a weight that I haven’t felt in my life, in a while.”

According to research, Obama’s not the only one feeling the “psychological toll” of the pandemic and BLM events.

The Lancet Psychiatry, revealed that soon after the release of the video taken during George Floyd’s killing, rates of depression and anxiety among Black Americans skyrocketed at ones much greater than any other group.

According to The Washington Post “The rate of black Americans showing clinically significant signs of anxiety or depressive disorders jumped from 36 percent to 41 percent in the week after the video of Floyd’s death became public. That represents roughly 1.4 million more people.”

To cope, Obama explained that she’s tried to be kind to herself in moments when she’s feeling down.

“You have to recognize that you’re in a place, a bad place, in order to get out of it,” she explained in the episode. “You kinda have to sit in it for a minute, to know, oh, oh, I’m feeling off. So now I gotta feed myself with something better.”

If you or someone you know is experiencing depression please call the National Depressive/Manic-Depressive Association Hotline at 1-800-826-3632 or the Crisis Call Center’s 24-hour hotline at 1-775-784-8090. 

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