Things That Matter

11 Real Life Wedding Cancellations And Why You Should Never, Ever Judge Women For Pulling The Plug

Some people seem to forget what weddings really are. Weddings are not about the canapés, the first dance or the ties the groomsmen wear, but about the beginning of a long life together. Yes, that means morning dragon breath, sickness, laundry, bills and maybe snotty bundles of smelly cuteness called babies. The wedding goes by fast and the laughs, drama, and hangovers are soon forgotten. What remains is the discovery of oneself and of the other. So unless you are 100% sure you want to take on that joyous but often rocky path of discovery, you have the right to change your mind right up to the last minute. Sometimes women are forced into marriage, either through violent means or by partners who are passive aggressive and basically guilt their girlfriends into marriage.

However, popular culture and la pinche sociedad machista have demonized those who cancel a wedding, particularly if the one who took the brave but uncomfortable choice is a woman. From romcoms (which stink of heteronormativity by the way) like Julia Roberts’ Runaway Bride to crappy reality shows, the groom is often seen as the victim and the bride as a coward runaway. Why not change the discourse, question choices and think that perhaps it was a bad relationship that needed to end? An engagement ring is not a death sentence and even if you have sent out the invitations, it is your life, your future, your corazón and your body that need to matter the most.

Here are stories of eleven wedding cancellations (for tips on what to expect if you do this, read here). If you wanna keep reading just make a vow: I shall not judge. If you feel the urge to judge these women, and men, who decided to take back their lives instead of committing to a marriage that would not have been a happy one, then please piensa bien en tus ideales en la vida.

1. This queen who lay the rules right from the start: no te metas en lo que no te importa.

Credit: Instagram. @paidcable

This woman has a very clear message. You never know what is going on in a person’s life. If you felt offended because you had already bought a gift and an outfit for the canceled wedding and need to vent out andando de chismosa, well, dude, just stop. Good on you @paidcable!

2. This chap who no perdió el estilo and who has some amazing friends

Credit: Instagram. @gunnerss

This guy is totally right: when you cancel a wedding, emotions run high, and some people actually take it as an act that affects THEM! As if… @gunnerss knows that real friends are there in sickness and in health until death do us part.

3. Now repeat after us: #justsayno #noshame

Credit: Instagram. @evesturges

We love it when women stick together and just say “it is all OK, your life will go on” and, most importantly, “NO SHAME”. Yes, there is no shame in canceling a night, but there is shame in not being true to yourself and getting into a marriage that might be doomed from the start. You might not really love the dude, y se permite, no pasa nada. The hardest word to say is sometimes a simple “no”, but saying it can be life-defining.

4. This lady and her life partner who decided to press the PAUSE button

Credit: Instagram. @misspilsner

We love this post about a couple who canceled the wedding and decided to seek help, get counseling and be at a better place before tying the knot. Sometimes it is not about the person not being right for you, but about the relationship needing more work before the ultimate “I do”.

5. This woman who was rescued by her boyfriend’s female friend

Credit: Twitter. @SanMar0714

This woman basically dodged a womanizer. A Twitter user who had been wooed by the groom contacted the bride, telling her that she had been receiving texts of a not-so-innocent nature from him. The rest, as they say, is history. The bodorrio was cancelled and the bride even ended up at the hospital. Her life with this jijodesu would have been even worse though, so she made the brave, wise choice.

6. But the infidelidad can be even worse when it involves the bride’s family

Credit: Twitter. @pedromurillojr

We hate the manera burlona in which this story is presented, but we decided to include it as it shows how vicious men can be about stories of failed weddings, what toxic masculinity looks like (if you are a dude reading this, take not on what NOT to do). It is no laughing matter: the groom cheated on the bride with her cousin. A relationship and a family relationship shattered. The matrimonio would have been a house of deceit, though.

7. A good end to a failed wedding

Credit: Twitter. @aciprensa

We love what a woman from Indiana, whose $30,000 wedding was canceled, didn’t want it all to go to waste… so she decided to host a grand banquet for the homeless. What a great action. This is a lot of good karma and brownie points in her future life as a strong, independent, single woman. Te amamos.

8. This woman who experienced the most awkward moment of all time

Credit: Instagram. @thespacenymph

Do yourself a favor and read this woman’s story. She likes trying on wedding dresses ever since she was bound to get married. She was doing this with her current BF and surprise… she bumps into her ex-suegros. Ouch! What a way to go down memory lane… or rather, highway to hell!

9. This lady who wants to wear that gorge smile and not that wedding dress

Credit: Instagram. @mecmcgie

The hashtags say it all: #almostabride #dodgedabullet #cancelledwedding #happilyeverafterthebreakup. She knew deep in her heart that she would be better off without the dude. In her own words, she dodged a bullet. We hope she treated herself with the $450 she sold the dress for!

10. Wow, this story of self-care and inspiration

Credit: Instagram. @melbay86

We love this success story: it is bittersweet because of the breakup and the fact her mother is no longer here, but it is inspiring in that she took the life-changing event of a canceled wedding as the first step towards discovery and personal betterment. We can only say “te mereces eso y todo lo bueno que venga, reina”. 

11. This tale of deceit and a brave woman who faced the truth


Credit: image. Digital Image. She Said.

A common mistake for people who are about to get married is overlooking the evident flaws that a partner can have. Nadie es perfecto and we can all be better, but sometimes you don’t want to put up with certain things. And that is fair and you have the right to say no. If you are in a similar situation, read the story by Julia Park Tracey in which she accepts being blown away by the sparkles. She writes in her essay” Why I Cancelled My Wedding At The Last Second”: “I didn’t notice the drinking and overlooked the drugs, which he said he didn’t do anymore and went ahead with plans for a big wedding; it was part of the fantasy of marrying Prince Charming”. As we said, the wedding is not the most important part of that night, but the actual “ever after” that follows.

 
 
 
 

Kobe Bryant Left Vanessa A Love Letter And She Just Found It Yesterday, The Day Before Her Birthday

Entertainment

Kobe Bryant Left Vanessa A Love Letter And She Just Found It Yesterday, The Day Before Her Birthday

vanessabryant / Instagram

It’s been nearly five months since the tragic death of NBA great Kobe Bryant and his similarly talented daughter Gianna. Grief still lingers for their loved ones left behind however and recently, Vanessa Bryant was reminded of her tragic loss once more as she was forced to celebrate her own birthday without her late husband and daughter.

Still, despite their noted absence on her big day, Bryant was given an emotional surprise that, while bitter, seemed very sweet.

On May 5th, Bryant celebrated her birthday and shared a special surprise from her day on Instagram.

In a post to her Instagram page, Bryant revealed that before her birthday, she found an envelope addressed to her and from her late husband.

“Yesterday I found an envelope labeled To: The Love of my Life. From, Tu Papi I waited to open one more letter on my birthday. It gave me something to look forward to today. The irony is that Kobe had a photo of me drawn with an Angel holding me up by an artist on the cover. Missing the Love of my Life and my sweet little Mamacita- my fellow Taurus. Grateful to wake up to my 3 sweet girls today. Wish we were all together,” she wrote in the caption.

Bryant kept the message left behind for her private, but we can only imagine how emotional her experience in reading it was.

Bryant’s surprising post comes just a few days after she celebrated her deceased daughter Gigi’s birthday. In a caption about her birthday, Bryant encouraged Instagramers to “consider wearing red, caption an act of kindness or show how you will play Gigi’s way since she always gave everything she did her all and led with kindness.” She also asked fans to use the hashtag #PlayGigisWay to join in celebrating her daughter while also sharing an image of a special bracelet with her daughter’s nickname on it. “We are in the process of making this bracelet available for proceeds to benefit our Mamba and Mambacita foundation. I will update you with a post when we have them available for purchase),” she wrote.

Latinas Talk: Breaking Up And Sticking It Out During Quarantine

Fierce

Latinas Talk: Breaking Up And Sticking It Out During Quarantine

@maria_uve_ / Instagram

Whether quarantine has brought you and your boo closer together, broken the relationship or brought out some ugly, we all know that Quarantining while in a relationship isn’t totally ideal. After all, when the option of getting space away from each other is off the table certain aspects of your relationship can seem more dire and troubling. We asked Latinas on our Instagram page what dating has like been during the Coronavirus and boy did they deliver!

How are you managing your relationship with your s/o right now?

Are you quarantining together or separately? How is the distance affecting your relationship?⁠

Check out the answers to our a questions below!

Dealing with long-distance

“I’m in a long-distance relationship but the uncertainty of when will we be able to make it to each other’s country is killing me.” — chaser.of.wonders

When the relationship just got started

“We’ve been dating since November and we are each in our own homes. So the skin hunger is real. I’m out of work but he is still working because construction is considered en essential service. It feels like we’ve missed relationship milestones on one hand, but have been together way longer because the situation has made time feel eternal. Some days are good and I feel like we are super connected and some days, if he’s too busy or my anxiety is high or we keep missing each others calls, it feels like we are drifting apart. Overall we are just doing the best we can and working on communication.” —angiebsantana

Facetime for lovers

“FaceTime has been a lifesaver and we send each other food through uber eats or online shop for them to be surprised the next morning and that kinda thing. We maintain date nights and watch a movie through FaceTime. It’s been hard we only live 30 min away but our love language is physical touch so I mailed him one of my shirts that smells like me and he sent me one of his hoodies to help me out during these times. ❤️ kept the love alive.” — okaykat96

You could be closer than ever

“Quarantined together and we’ve grown closer spiritually, emotionally and more in love than ever before.” —gelseyes

Heartbreak hurts but it also means growth

“He said he needed distance from me.. and we were quarantined apart 😐 so we broke up.” — natmrte

Do nie things for eachother and together

“We will have been a couple for 7 years this August (married for 1.5) and this is the most time we’ve ever spent together bc we have had opposite work schedules our entire relationship. It’s been awesome. I get to see him when I wake up and he sees me when he wakes up. We make meals together, have done bike rides around the block, watched all kinds of movies etc.”–_hi_rose_

Communication is KEY

“Stronger 💞 we have been communicating more than ever. We both have busy schedules even during quarantine but manage to check in throughout the day.”–wanderess.v