relationships

This Valentine’s Day I Am Treating My Husband To The Same Love He Gives Me Year-Round

Giorgio Encinas / Unsplash

My husband and I had our first date on Valentine’s day — cheesy, I know. We didn’t intend on having some romantic time on that specific day, but it turned out that was the only day we could actually meet. So we agreed to go out on that day knowing full-well that first dates on Valentine’s Day are not only loaded with so much pressure but also super corny. However, we didn’t let that baggage stop us from meeting up. Thankfully it turned out to be one of the best dates I’ve ever had — and two years later we got married.

While he acknowledges our wedding date as our real anniversary, I cannot help but still think about our first date five years ago. One of the biggest reasons why I fell in love with him was because of his romantic sensibility.

I love romantic comedies and those over-the-top mushy love stories. However, when it comes to me embracing love, or allowing someone to love me is another story. Despite my drawbacks, I genuinely try to let my husband be romantic even though I am always suspicious of it, or worse become distant simply because how much mush can someone take? When I get like this — bitchy and annoying toward my husband when he wants to be loving — I try to remember how my life would be if he weren’t in it. That’s when I take control of anxiety (as best as I can) and give him the love that he deserves.

This year, for our first-date anniversary on Valentine’s Day, I’m making a conscious effort to do something very different.

CREDIT: Unsplash

I am taking charge of the day he came into my life by showering him with all the love he gives me year-round. I think it’s ridiculous how much social pressure it is for a man to be the one that makes all of the grand gestures. Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to get special gifts like flowers and be taken out on romantic dinners, but it’s rare that that kind of pressure or obligation is placed on me, the woman. Relationships take work from both parties, so it’s only fair that I should put in as much work as he does. Also, Valentine’s Day is already loaded with so much anticipation that includes wondering “what will he get me this year” or “he better not forget today is Valentine’s Day because if he does…” No one has time for that kind of stress. So my advice to you is not to take the love that you share for granted because that is only a problem waiting to happen.

Take control of your Valentine’s Day and show him how much he truly means to you with no strings attached.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Do not treat him like your king only to get something in return. That is just cruel and insincere. (Again, my advice is for women, who like me, get moody a lot and have a difficult time being loved.) Let your guard down and be there for him. It doesn’t have to be on Valentine’s Day, but try to show him love as much as he loves you at least once a day. Here are some easy things you can do.

Make him his favorite meal.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Who doesn’t love good food? So if he’s into gooey casseroles, make it (or buy premade), or if he desires Arby’s, then go through the drive-thru and surprise him with his favorite meal. Just pair a nice glass of bourbon, or whatever he’s into. He will be floored with just that.

Give him a day at the spa or relaxing beach time.

CREDIT: Unsplash

This is probably a gift for you more than it is for him. There are a ton of men’s grooming salons that will greet him with a complimentary glass of wine and make him feel like he just won the lottery.

Let him compliment you and don’t question it.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Now, this gift is free, but hard to do for some of us (at least for me). When my husband is all cutesy or loving, it’s super easy for me to roll my eyes. Instead of being jaded, let the love take over.

If he’s into sports, get him tickets to a game of his choice.

CREDIT: Unsplash

If you’re not into sports, tell him he can take his friend. But really, try and bear one game, it won’t kill you.

Get him a box of chocolates.

CREDIT: Unsplash

If you’re not the lovey-dovey type, fake it for just one day at least. Your boo will adore you for putting in some real effort.

My point is, don’t expect him to treat you like a queen when you treat him like a peasant. Now, if your husband isn’t as romantic as mine…perhaps you should let him read this essay to clue him in on things he should be doing for you.


READ: I Started Yearly Trips To Mexico With My White Husband So We Could Better Understand Each Other

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20 Valentine's Day Gift Ideas For All The People You Love In Your Life

relationships

20 Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas For All The People You Love In Your Life

mitú

Valentine’s Day is one of the most emotionally loaded days of the year. Do you share your love with just your main squeeze or do you try to spread that love out to your besties as well? Well, guess what? You no longer have to decide. Here are 20 things you can buy all of the loves of your life.

“Will you be my Valentina?” Pin | $9.99

mitú

You’ve got to have a Valentine before you can have that magical Valentine’s Day. Get them while they’re still in stock.

I’m Falling For You Tee | $24.99

mitú

We turn memes into shirts, people, and turn those shirts into opportunities to lightly tell your boo that your love fall is epic. Dive in to love, baby.

All We Need Is Guac | $9.99

mitú
You know it’s love when your boo eats the avocado you’ve been waiting to ripen and you only feel mildly homicidal. Hold onto that one.

“You’re My Other Half” Pin Pack | $19.99

mitú

The real question is which one is the butt? And does it mandate a nalga tattoo? Control the narrative and get on these before your other half does.

Baby guarcado cupid pin | $9.99

mitú

Your new amor’s guacamole’s tugging at your heart strings? Let them know they’ve got you hooked.

World’s best suegra Mug | $14.99

mitú

Everyone knows that the person you really need to woo is your novio’s mami (or papi). Don’t worry, we have suegra and suegro mugs to do all your brownie point work for you.

You’re the Guac to My Chip Mug | $14.99

mitú

We all know that food is the foundation for every healthy Latino on Latino relationship. This rings more true than any sappy Hallmark card ever could.

She’s the limón to my chile Tee | $24.99

mitú

Put your love on blast and get your boo this pre-shrunk couple’s tee. My fellow Latina lesbians, you can go all out matching on this one. 😛

“You’re my other half” guarcado gift bag | $35

mitú

Can’t figure out what to get? Get your Valentine a squishy, plush Guarcado along with two mystery pins and an extra mystery item.

Pro tip: if you can’t wrap for mierda, this one comes pre-wrapped for you.

Let’s Avocuddle! Card | $3.75

ClaudiaRamosDesigns / Etsy

No white people are profiting off any of these cutie avocado characters. They belong to the Latinx community, and we ship it hard.

Kinky Piñata Pin | $9.99

mitú

Maybe you have a more casual thing going on, and want to make sure your new boo is reminded of you. Meet mitú’s “Kinky Piñata.” He’s wearing his civilian clothing ahora mismo, so only you and your PYT will know his true nature.

“Me Vales Madres” Sweatshirt | $39.99

mitú

Maybe you’re single? Maybe you’re not? Maybe everyone could mind their business?! Scream it from the rooftops, poderosa.

Te Boté Sweatshirt | $39.99

mitú

Love is in the air, and you have no breath to waste on rejecting the pendejos coming your way. Let the crop speak for you.

“Thank you, next” Paquita Phone Case | $19.99

mitú

Your heart cannot be broken by what filled it up. Ariana Grande has made you ready for your next ‘heartbreak’. Go get it, hunny.

“Nope, Todavía, No Tengo Novio” Sweatshirt | $39.99

mitú

This sweatshirt will get the job done on more than just Valentine’s Day. Wear it to your tía’s cada vez, and especially on Nochebuena. Bury me in it, por favor. 🏳️‍🌈

Mejor sola que mal acompañada Tee | $24.99

mitú

Sometimes, people get down when they reflect on their first Valentine’s Day single after a big break up. Not you. Your ex had malo in him and you’re home free and loving yourself.

“Qué novio ni que nada” Crop Sweatshirt | $39.99

mitú

You know which BFF needs this reminder. Amigas poderosas have to stick together.

Best Flans Pin Pack | $15.99

mitú

Best friends get love on V-Day, but best flans get extra. Show your No. 1 comadre you’re flans for life.

Chismosas 4 ever pin pack | $14.99

mitú

You could talk to this mujer longer than anyone else on your speed dial. Let her know she’s earned the top spot for life.

Himalayan Salt Tequila Glasses | $28

“Himalayan Salt Tequila Glasses- Set of 4” Digital Image. Uncommon Goods. 5 February 2019.

Maybe you’re just ready to get a little lonely drunk or with your favorite person. Every chupito has a pink salt rim with this fancy regalo.


READ: I Might Be Single But I Still Love Valentine’s Day And The Love I Show Myself

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