relationships

This Valentine’s Day I Am Treating My Husband To The Same Love He Gives Me Year-Round

My husband and I had our first date on Valentine’s day — cheesy, I know. We didn’t intend on having some romantic time on that specific day, but it turned out that was the only day we could actually meet. So we agreed to go out on that day knowing full-well that first dates on Valentine’s Day are not only loaded with so much pressure but also super corny. However, we didn’t let that baggage stop us from meeting up. Thankfully it turned out to be one of the best dates I’ve ever had — and two years later we got married.

While he acknowledges our wedding date as our real anniversary, I cannot help but still think about our first date five years ago. One of the biggest reasons why I fell in love with him was because of his romantic sensibility.

I love romantic comedies and those over-the-top mushy love stories. However, when it comes to me embracing love, or allowing someone to love me is another story. Despite my drawbacks, I genuinely try to let my husband be romantic even though I am always suspicious of it, or worse become distant simply because how much mush can someone take? When I get like this — bitchy and annoying toward my husband when he wants to be loving — I try to remember how my life would be if he weren’t in it. That’s when I take control of anxiety (as best as I can) and give him the love that he deserves.

This year, for our first-date anniversary on Valentine’s Day, I’m making a conscious effort to do something very different.

CREDIT: Unsplash

I am taking charge of the day he came into my life by showering him with all the love he gives me year-round. I think it’s ridiculous how much social pressure it is for a man to be the one that makes all of the grand gestures. Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to get special gifts like flowers and be taken out on romantic dinners, but it’s rare that that kind of pressure or obligation is placed on me, the woman. Relationships take work from both parties, so it’s only fair that I should put in as much work as he does. Also, Valentine’s Day is already loaded with so much anticipation that includes wondering “what will he get me this year” or “he better not forget today is Valentine’s Day because if he does…” No one has time for that kind of stress. So my advice to you is not to take the love that you share for granted because that is only a problem waiting to happen.

Take control of your Valentine’s Day and show him how much he truly means to you with no strings attached.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Do not treat him like your king only to get something in return. That is just cruel and insincere. (Again, my advice is for women, who like me, get moody a lot and have a difficult time being loved.) Let your guard down and be there for him. It doesn’t have to be on Valentine’s Day, but try to show him love as much as he loves you at least once a day. Here are some easy things you can do.

Make him his favorite meal.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Who doesn’t love good food? So if he’s into gooey casseroles, make it (or buy premade), or if he desires Arby’s, then go through the drive-thru and surprise him with his favorite meal. Just pair a nice glass of bourbon, or whatever he’s into. He will be floored with just that.

Give him a day at the spa or relaxing beach time.

CREDIT: Unsplash

This is probably a gift for you more than it is for him. There are a ton of men’s grooming salons that will greet him with a complimentary glass of wine and make him feel like he just won the lottery.

Let him compliment you and don’t question it.

CREDIT: Unsplash

Now, this gift is free, but hard to do for some of us (at least for me). When my husband is all cutesy or loving, it’s super easy for me to roll my eyes. Instead of being jaded, let the love take over.

If he’s into sports, get him tickets to a game of his choice.

CREDIT: Unsplash

If you’re not into sports, tell him he can take his friend. But really, try and bear one game, it won’t kill you.

Get him a box of chocolates.

CREDIT: Unsplash

If you’re not the lovey-dovey type, fake it for just one day at least. Your boo will adore you for putting in some real effort.

My point is, don’t expect him to treat you like a queen when you treat him like a peasant. Now, if your husband isn’t as romantic as mine…perhaps you should let him read this essay to clue him in on things he should be doing for you.


READ: I Started Yearly Trips To Mexico With My White Husband So We Could Better Understand Each Other

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Juni From ‘Spy Kids’ Is Going To Be A Dad And Where Did All The Years Go???

Entertainment

Juni From ‘Spy Kids’ Is Going To Be A Dad And Where Did All The Years Go???

Michael Tran / Stringer

You heard it here ‘Spy Kids’ fans! Daryl Sabara, who played the part of Juni Cortez in the original Robert Rodriguez franchise, is going to be a dad for the very first time. That’s right, on Wednesday during an appearance on the “Today show” the actor and his popstar wife Meghan Trainor announced that they are now about to be all about that baby!

On Wednesday Sabara and Trainor revealed that they are expecting their first child together.

“I’m very good as you can tell — it’s all Christmas here,” Trainor teased. “But there’s other news that I’m dying to tell you and my heart’s pounding out of my chest,” she said before telling her husband to “hit it,” before Sabara proudly revealed, “We’re pregnant!”

“We’re so excited we couldn’t sleep,” Trainor gushed. “We’ve been waiting for so long. I was thinking about who do we tell first and I’ve told Hoda since I was 19, going to the Today show, ‘I will have the most babies in the world.’ “

“Every time I see you, I’m like, it’s going to happen,” shee continued. “And it finally happened!”

Trainor, 26, and Sabara, 28, married two years ago in December 2018.

At the time, the two shared that they had been set up by their mutual friend Chloë Grace Moretz and became certain right away that they were in it for the long haul. “I definitely was positive month one when he was on tour with me, and we were like basically living together on the road,” Trainor told People in an interview at the time.

“It’s super cheesy, but when you know, you know,” Sabara explained at the time. “As soon as she walked in the room and I saw her, I just knew: This is the one.”

Since before their marriage, the couple has been open and vocal about their desire to have children.

“If we could do it how we want to, we’d be, like, totally preggo right now!” Trainor told People in an interview before getting married. “We’re ready to rumble. I want some children! I want kids! We’re both so excited for it. We both constantly watch baby YouTube videos and lessons on YouTube, like ‘How to take care of an infant.’ We’re just getting prepared every single day.”

Trainor also expressed her desire to start a family, as soon as she finished touring for her album, Treat Myself.

“I’m hounding everyone, like, ‘When can I get pregnant?’ I think after the tour, I’m just going to get it going,” she said at the time. “I definitely want a village!”

For now, it seems Trainor and Sabara are well on their way to fulfilling their dreams of a family.

“He’ll get dinner for me and set it all up for me, and he knows what I want to drink, makes my ginger ale with my ice,” Trainor raved. “He takes care of me to the fullest level that I don’t even lift a finger. … I never thought I’d be so spoiled in love. He completes everything.”

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Women On Reddit Shared What It Was Like To Catch Their Significant Others Cheating And The Stories Are Heartbreaking

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Women On Reddit Shared What It Was Like To Catch Their Significant Others Cheating And The Stories Are Heartbreaking

WMG

Anyone who has ever been in an unstable relationship knows that the situation related to such circumstances literally blows. But what about when such a relationship is affected by one of the worst kinds of betrayal?

Recently, a user on Reddit asked others what their experiences of dealing with a cheater were like, and the answers were pretty eyeopening.

Check them out below!

“I found a note from the nanny”

“My ex husband and his family smoked a lot of pot, still do. His sister, kids, and nanny were visiting from out of state for a few weeks. When it was time to fly home they left their stash at my ex MILs house because they didn’t want to take it on the plane. My ex asked if I would pick it up because I was nearby. Stupidly I agree. I don’t smoke and I was willing to carry it in my car for him. To my surprise I found a note from the nanny to my ex saying she was in love with him and she was so happy for the time they had together. Obviously she thought he would get the weed instead of me. While it was incredibly painful at the time I am definitely living my best life 15 years later.” – mycatsnameisjanet

“I tested positive for chlamydia.”

“Went for my yearly check up and tested positive for chlamydia. Turns out my ex was sleeping around… apparently false positives are common with these types of tests so have your SO tested as well. I hope you’re in a relationship where you can openly talk about such things.” – needsmoreusername

“I suspected an affair but didn’t have proof.”

“The husband of one of the women he was cheating on me with called me at work. At first I didn’t believe him and hung up. How could the man i spent the past 8 years with,had 2 beautiful babies with, suffered together the loss of one of those children do something so hurtful?? Still a part of me had doubt. He had affairs in other relationships and we had a rocky patch early in the beginning where I suspected an affair but didn’t have proof. I told my boss I felt sick and had to leave early and I called this guy back and found out that my ex and his wife along with one of their friends were all sleeping together for about a year. He had confronted my ex and told him that he was going to tell me but my ex convinced him to wait a month since my mother had just died. I took my time coming home and confronted him and told him to pack and leave. Since I’ve pieced together a lot of what happened and all the lies he told me where if I was in a different headspace I might have caught on to the affairs earlier. I also found videos hidden on one of our computers and found out he was having bootycalls in our apartment while I was at work and he was watching our daughter. At that point it put the headstone on any possibility of reconciliation.” – Shomzy

“He forced me out of the room… literally grabbed me by the neck.”

“I owned a house with my fiancé. I woke up in the middle of the night and he wasn’t in bed. I went searching. His truck and another vehicle were in the driveway. Then, I went upstairs and found the guest bedroom was locked. After barging my way in… I found him with another woman in bed. That bed happened to be my childhood bed. He forced me out of the room… literally grabbed me by the neck and pushed me out and closed the door back. I knew I couldn’t do anything at that point, so I called his parents who lived a few blocks away. His dad showed up and another fight broke out. I ended up leaving and staying at his parents until dawn. I moved out that weekend and let the house foreclose. 9 years later.. it’s finally off my credit report, I’m happily married to an amazing man and we own a beautiful home together.” – dddallasss

“I was 8 months pregnant.”

“I was 8 months pregnant with our second child at the time and he wanted to go visit his brother for the weekend. I asked my doctor if it was safe for me to travel and she said it would be fine. I told my husband I could go but he said he was really hoping to just have some time with his brother, I understood because a new baby really makes it hard to spend quality time but I asked if he could take our older son (3yo at the time) so he could see his grandma and cousins. He said they were planning on drinking and whatnot and wasn’t sure it would be a good idea. (They’re country boys so think shooting, drinking and whatnot) I agreed and he left for the weekend. After he left I get a call from his best friend telling me that he’ll be in town for the weekend and he wanted to meet up, not weird he called me because my husband was terrible at answering his phone. I told him unfortunately my husband was visiting back home, bad timing. His best friend then said ok, I’m going to call you back. And hung up very abruptly. Turns out my husband and his wife had been caught by him a few months previously and he gave them a chance to make it right…I don’t know why. He didn’t tell me but threatened to if they didn’t stop. Well, they didn’t stop and he told me. I think the worst part was that my husband’s family knew and never once thought to tell me. These people were my family for 5 years and nothing. It’s been almost 10 years now and I’m so much happier but it was definitely an eye opening experience.” – Endlessnite

“They were making out in the background of one photo.”

“Very unhealthy relationship. He was emotionally very abusive and I was in a terrible place with my mental health. I found out at the ultrasound to determine the gender of our child. He was late and I was noodling on Facebook waiting to be called. He was tagged in some photos in my news feed from a gig he’d been at on the previous weekend. Random lass was in all the photos of him and they were all over each other. Also they were making out in the background of one photo. He turned up after I was called in. While the technician was printing the images I told him I knew. He went off and on about how I was making it up, he’d never do that, obviously I was lying to compensate for cheating on him and so on. When I pointed out there were photos he stormed out and left me there. My Dad had turned up during the appointment (anticipating that he’d react badly if we were having a girl, which he did, that was scattered through the cheating denials) and took me home. I considered us broken up at that point and stopped all contact except texts related to the pregnancy. Mostly I was relieved. I had concrete evidence that it wasn’t in my head and I finally managed to escape that relationship.” – Axel_ProseI was literally the last to know.

“I was literally the last to know.”

“June 1, 2018. Normal day. A Friday. My husband had kissed me goodbye and gone to work. I was cleaning the house for company who was coming to stay the weekend. The doorbell rang. There was a man at my door who introduced himself as the husband of a woman who my husband worked with. He was there to tell me that my husband and his wife were having an affair. He had busted them about six months prior and had told his wife that she had to end the affair. He thinks that she did end it…for about three months, but then they started up again. When he found out they were at it again, he called my husband (because he knew if he confronted him in person, he’d be in a jail cell for what he’d have done). On the phone, he told my husband to leave his wife alone or else he would come and tell me everything that was happening. Apparently, my husband thought that he was bluffing. So I was literally the last to know. My husband never came home again. He got an air b’n’b and a lawyer. The divorce was December 21, 2018. We had been together for 24 years. Still hurts.” – headcase-and-a-half

“Me ex-husband was an early adopter of sending dick pics. I got his phone to get the numbers of his friends to invite them to a surprise birthday party while he was sleeping off a hangover, and there they were in his outbox. ETA- this was more than 12 years ago. When camera phones were barely functional.” – BooksNShizzz

“She had everything public, photos with him, bragging about the texts they exchanged.”

“Back then Facebook used to display on your profile stuff like “dontsayaword2 liked a photo” and everything you did. I noticed he liked a photo of a girl that seemed to be someone he had recently added. So I checked her profile and she was one of those girls who think “they won” because men cheat on their partners with them. She had everything public, photos with him, bragging about the texts they exchanged etc. So I engineered a way to befriend her roommate, I would then find out she was bringing other dudes home besides my boyfriend and when I confronted him I also let him know about who else she was sleeping with and for him to get an STD test.” – dontsayaword2

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