relationships

These Cheesy Nicknames Are Not So Romantic Once You Translate Them To English

Credit: @fai029 / Instagram

If your parents or abuelos are extra romantic, then chances are you’ve heard them call each other by these corny Spanish nicknames. But once you type these nicknames onto Google Translate… well, they’re not so romantic anymore.



Check out the random, hilarious translations Google gave us for these nicknames:

Latinos use “vieja” as a sweet nickname for a long-term partner. ?????

Love her to death!! ?#mivieja

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The nicknames “vieja” and “viejo” represent the idea that you two are going to grow old together.?

But once you look it up on Google translate…

vieja 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

Well…just doesn’t sound so sweet anymore. LOL

Some couples also like to call each other “gordo” or “gorda.” ?

Con mi guaton #amordelbueno #migordo #iloveyou

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It just doesn’t get more affectionate than “mi gordo”.

Even though “gordo” is a cute nickname in Spanish, it doesn’t sound so cute in English:

gordo 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

Let’s see how your boyfriend or girlfriend reacts when you call them fat. “Hey fat, can you come over here a second?”

Some guys like to call their girlfriends “güera”.

"Ivan borra la foto salgo bien fea.." *comienzan los golopes* #TeAmo #MiGüera #TeAdoro

A photo posted by Ivan Davila (@ivandavila8520) on


It’s one of the most common nicknames.

But Google translate gives you the name of a city in Germany. ?

güera 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

This entiiiiire time guys have been calling their girls the name of a city in Germany. So romantic.

For the fellas that have short girlfriends or wives, there’s the nickname: “chaparra.” ❤️

#bae #goals #girlfriend #loveu #michaparra ????????❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

A post shared by Alan_Drums (@alan_drums97) on


Basically, if you’re shorter than 5’5″, then you qualify as a “chaparra.” And the same goes for guys.

But Google translate couldn’t even find a translation for this word.

chaparra 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

An accurate translation would be “shawty” or “lil mama”.

Alternatives for petite significant others are “chiquitita” or “chiquitito.”


Similar to the nickname “baby girrrrl”- “chiquitita” is the perfect nickname to use when your significant other is looking mighty fine.

But the Google translation is a bit of a turn-off.

chiquitita 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

*crinnnnge*

Some couples use the nickname “loquito mío” when they’re joking around, being careless and silly.

? #fili #loquitomio ?

A photo posted by karolyne .. (@karolyne_jc) on


So when your significant other says something wild and silly, you can use the nickname “loquito mío”- similar to “my crazy/silly baby”.

But Google translate didn’t quite get that…

loquito mío 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

“My little thing”???

When someone wants to show off their sexy boyfriend or husband, they use the nickname “papi lindo.” ?


Because #mcm is too basic.

And Google translate wasn’t too far off with this one. ?

papi lindo 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

Yup, “daddy” is a common bf/husband nickname.

Couples that are extra cheesy enjoy using nicknames like “bon bon.” ?

my sweetie pie, my other half! i love you to the moon and back, babe!!! ??? #mypuzzlepiece #mibonbon

A post shared by ??????? ?? (@heartovermind) on


Pitbull actually has a song called “bon bon”… but he doesn’t use the nickname in a cheesy way. ?

This time Google translate changed the language from Spanish to Arabic… but still didn’t have a translation.

bon bon 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

Google translate really is entertaining…

Another cheesy nickname to add to the list is: “mis ojitos.”

#cachetes #ojitos #adidas ?

A post shared by Liliana (@lmab1185) on


If you’ve seen the movie “Monsters Inc.” the nickname “googly eyes” is just like the nickname “mis ojitos.”

If only Google translate had given us the translation “googly eyes.”

ojitos 01

*sigh*

When couples are feeling extra romantic, they call each other nicknames like “mi cosita.”

Sorpresa de aniversario ??#aniversario#3#micosita gracias por la sorpresa, detalles que enamoran…

A post shared by Fabian Medina (@fai029) on


But if you’re not a cheesy person, then you might not feel so comfortable with the nickname “mi cosita”… like this guy above.?

But it seems like Google translate really loves the word “little.”

mi cosita 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

Someone please tell Google that “little thannnng” would sound better as a couple’s nickname.

Can’t forget about the couples that are sooo deeply in love. They probably have a thousand nicknames for each other, one of them being “corazón de melón.”

#10años and counting ? love you ? #corazondemelon

A photo posted by Pita (@sunpita) on


This couple is what you would call: “los enamorados”.

But it doesn’t sound so romantic in English. ?

corazón de melón 01
CREDIT: GOOGLE TRANSLATE

❤️?


READ: Quiz: Ladies, What’s Your Mexican Nickname?


From Too Much Spit To Not Enough Heat, Latinas Dropped Truths On What It Was Like To Have Their First Kisses

Culture

From Too Much Spit To Not Enough Heat, Latinas Dropped Truths On What It Was Like To Have Their First Kisses

GreenPimp | Getty Images

It’s the Summer and lately, we’ve been feeling a little romantic. It has us thinking about the sweltering heat, moonlit nights and someone special to spend it with. All this romantic energy has made us kinda nostalgic about our own love lives and those moments that made them memorable. Whether our first kiss was fun and casual or with the loves of our lives, they’re a part of who we are now. To celebrate these smooches, we asked Latinas to tell us about their first kiss.

Here’s what they had to say about these monumental first.

The kiss that was packed with a lot of peer pressure.

Teen Vogue

“For my first kiss, I was about 8 years old lol. My older cousin made me kiss a little boy while visiting our abuelo in Mexico. The little boy lived next door to my abuelo.

I apparently wasn’t ready to have my first kiss because I was super shy and I didn’t have a crush on the boy, I just felt a little pressured because my cousin was like, “Kiss him, kiss him.” So me and the little boy kissed in front of my cousin and his brother.

It was a little peck, but at that age it felt like I did something horrible. I remember later seeing my parents and going up to them and telling them right away that I kissed a boy because I felt so guilty. They told me that I was too young to be doing that. I, of course, didn’t rat out my cousin for pressuring me into it, but blamed myself more.

Eight years old… yup that’s way too young. Funny first kiss though lol. Now everytime I go visit my abuelo in Mexico, I look at the front of the house where I kissed the little boy and just laugh. ” — Jenny, Los Angeles

The kiss that started it all.

Girl’s Life

“I had my first kiss when I was 16 and it honestly felt like it would never come. I had a flirtation with a boy in my Algebra class so — on a whim — I invited him to a game night sponsored by one of our school’s clubs.

During the evening, he and I decided to take a walk together. It was nice but he kept stopping and staring at me. I’d later find out he was working up the nerve to kiss me but at the time I was a wreck! We didn’t kiss that night but I invited him to my house the following day. 

We were upstairs sitting side by side on the family room couch. It was so peaceful with just the two of us. Suddenly, my mom called us downstairs and totally ruined the mood! When we sat up, we turned to each other and both leaned in.

We kissed three times before nervously heading downstairs. I was totally in love! Seventeen years later, we’re married with three kids. I think my first kiss came exactly when it was meant to.” — Samantha, Houston

The kiss that was a playdate peck.

DailyMail

“I was 5 years old and he was my best friend. He was the son of my mom’s best friend, actually, and we were inseparable as little kids. One day, we were reading Sleeping Beauty and, in the end, they kiss and the princess wakes up. I don’t remember which one of us said it but we got the idea to try it. And we did!” — Irina

The kiss that was practice for the real thing.

Seventeen Magazine

“My first kiss was actually with a girl. My best friend and I had grown up together since we were 7 years old.

Because both of our parents worked we spent a lot of time over at each others houses being ‘watched’ by our older siblings or baby sisters. Most of the time that including the older caretakers flipping on the TV and having us watch it while it watched us for them. So, many of our hours in the summer were spent watching tv shows and movies that were romantic in nature.

When we 13 years old we watched ‘Wild Things’ and realized that we could practice for our first kisses on each other. TBH it was a sweet, non-sexual exchange between friends. And we still are to this day.” —Ana, Brooklyn

The kiss that was twenty years in the making.

Dailyhunt

“I had a crush on this boy for years in grade school who I had known since we were four. I was a very late bloomer when it came to sexual experiences because I grew up in a very sheltered household. So, by the time I was in college and 20 years old I was pretty convinced it would never happen to me.

Finally, I went out to a party with friends and saw my former crush from elementary school. We caught each other early on in the night and later in the evening after a few drinks saw each other again. While we were catching up outside of the party he kissed me.

It was such a relief at the time, but pretty heartbreaking later when I realized most people in college just go around kissing people for fun and it doesn’t mean anything! Haha!” — Gabby, Texas

The kiss that never should have happened.

VeryWellMind.com

“My first kiss was from an uncle who was a complete pervert. I don’t really like to talk about it and normally when people ask me this question I just say that it was from the second person who ever kissed me.” —Anonymous

The kiss that exceeded all the hype.

Mid-day.com

“I think by the time I got around to getting my first kiss, so many of my friends had assured me that it was no big deal, and it would be nothing special. I think that that’s why when it finally came around it felt truly special and intimate.

At the time, I was in a church group during the summer when I was 15 and had liked a boy in my class called Mateo. He told my friends during a break that he wanted to kiss me one week and I had been so scared, even though I liked him, that I just avoided him. My heart would beat so fast every time we were around each other.

Finally after what felt like years but was probably just a couple of weeks I told him that I liked him and wanted to kiss him too. He kissed me outside under a tree. It was very sweet.” — Veronica, Chicago

11 Real Life Wedding Cancellations And Why You Should Never, Ever Judge Women For Pulling The Plug

Things That Matter

11 Real Life Wedding Cancellations And Why You Should Never, Ever Judge Women For Pulling The Plug

mofles | iStock / Getty Images

Some people seem to forget what weddings really are. Weddings are not about the canapés, the first dance or the ties the groomsmen wear, but about the beginning of a long life together. Yes, that means morning dragon breath, sickness, laundry, bills and maybe snotty bundles of smelly cuteness called babies. The wedding goes by fast and the laughs, drama, and hangovers are soon forgotten. What remains is the discovery of oneself and of the other. So unless you are 100% sure you want to take on that joyous but often rocky path of discovery, you have the right to change your mind right up to the last minute. Sometimes women are forced into marriage, either through violent means or by partners who are passive aggressive and basically guilt their girlfriends into marriage.

However, popular culture and la pinche sociedad machista have demonized those who cancel a wedding, particularly if the one who took the brave but uncomfortable choice is a woman. From romcoms (which stink of heteronormativity by the way) like Julia Roberts’ Runaway Bride to crappy reality shows, the groom is often seen as the victim and the bride as a coward runaway. Why not change the discourse, question choices and think that perhaps it was a bad relationship that needed to end? An engagement ring is not a death sentence and even if you have sent out the invitations, it is your life, your future, your corazón and your body that need to matter the most.

Here are stories of eleven wedding cancellations (for tips on what to expect if you do this, read here). If you wanna keep reading just make a vow: I shall not judge. If you feel the urge to judge these women, and men, who decided to take back their lives instead of committing to a marriage that would not have been a happy one, then please piensa bien en tus ideales en la vida.

1. This queen who lay the rules right from the start: no te metas en lo que no te importa.

Credit: Instagram. @paidcable

This woman has a very clear message. You never know what is going on in a person’s life. If you felt offended because you had already bought a gift and an outfit for the canceled wedding and need to vent out andando de chismosa, well, dude, just stop. Good on you @paidcable!

2. This chap who no perdió el estilo and who has some amazing friends

Credit: Instagram. @gunnerss

This guy is totally right: when you cancel a wedding, emotions run high, and some people actually take it as an act that affects THEM! As if… @gunnerss knows that real friends are there in sickness and in health until death do us part.

3. Now repeat after us: #justsayno #noshame

Credit: Instagram. @evesturges

We love it when women stick together and just say “it is all OK, your life will go on” and, most importantly, “NO SHAME”. Yes, there is no shame in canceling a night, but there is shame in not being true to yourself and getting into a marriage that might be doomed from the start. You might not really love the dude, y se permite, no pasa nada. The hardest word to say is sometimes a simple “no”, but saying it can be life-defining.

4. This lady and her life partner who decided to press the PAUSE button

Credit: Instagram. @misspilsner

We love this post about a couple who canceled the wedding and decided to seek help, get counseling and be at a better place before tying the knot. Sometimes it is not about the person not being right for you, but about the relationship needing more work before the ultimate “I do”.

5. This woman who was rescued by her boyfriend’s female friend

Credit: Twitter. @SanMar0714

This woman basically dodged a womanizer. A Twitter user who had been wooed by the groom contacted the bride, telling her that she had been receiving texts of a not-so-innocent nature from him. The rest, as they say, is history. The bodorrio was cancelled and the bride even ended up at the hospital. Her life with this jijodesu would have been even worse though, so she made the brave, wise choice.

6. But the infidelidad can be even worse when it involves the bride’s family

Credit: Twitter. @pedromurillojr

We hate the manera burlona in which this story is presented, but we decided to include it as it shows how vicious men can be about stories of failed weddings, what toxic masculinity looks like (if you are a dude reading this, take not on what NOT to do). It is no laughing matter: the groom cheated on the bride with her cousin. A relationship and a family relationship shattered. The matrimonio would have been a house of deceit, though.

7. A good end to a failed wedding

Credit: Twitter. @aciprensa

We love what a woman from Indiana, whose $30,000 wedding was canceled, didn’t want it all to go to waste… so she decided to host a grand banquet for the homeless. What a great action. This is a lot of good karma and brownie points in her future life as a strong, independent, single woman. Te amamos.

8. This woman who experienced the most awkward moment of all time

Credit: Instagram. @thespacenymph

Do yourself a favor and read this woman’s story. She likes trying on wedding dresses ever since she was bound to get married. She was doing this with her current BF and surprise… she bumps into her ex-suegros. Ouch! What a way to go down memory lane… or rather, highway to hell!

9. This lady who wants to wear that gorge smile and not that wedding dress

Credit: Instagram. @mecmcgie

The hashtags say it all: #almostabride #dodgedabullet #cancelledwedding #happilyeverafterthebreakup. She knew deep in her heart that she would be better off without the dude. In her own words, she dodged a bullet. We hope she treated herself with the $450 she sold the dress for!

10. Wow, this story of self-care and inspiration

Credit: Instagram. @melbay86

We love this success story: it is bittersweet because of the breakup and the fact her mother is no longer here, but it is inspiring in that she took the life-changing event of a canceled wedding as the first step towards discovery and personal betterment. We can only say “te mereces eso y todo lo bueno que venga, reina”. 

11. This tale of deceit and a brave woman who faced the truth


Credit: image. Digital Image. She Said.

A common mistake for people who are about to get married is overlooking the evident flaws that a partner can have. Nadie es perfecto and we can all be better, but sometimes you don’t want to put up with certain things. And that is fair and you have the right to say no. If you are in a similar situation, read the story by Julia Park Tracey in which she accepts being blown away by the sparkles. She writes in her essay” Why I Cancelled My Wedding At The Last Second”: “I didn’t notice the drinking and overlooked the drugs, which he said he didn’t do anymore and went ahead with plans for a big wedding; it was part of the fantasy of marrying Prince Charming”. As we said, the wedding is not the most important part of that night, but the actual “ever after” that follows.

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