relationships

Climb out of the Tinder basement: 19 ways to level up your game

If all your Tinder game has led to recently is a sprained swiping finger, it’s time to upgrade your profile to get the matches rolling. You don’t need a head-to-toe makeover straight out of the movies to seriously improve your desirability on the dating app. Instead, perfect your message and make sure your profile is saying what you want people to hear. With a few new profile pictures and a strong bio, prepare to spend a lot more time on dates with recent matches and a lot less time worrying about your number.

Your starter job headshot was awesome, but why are using it 10 years later?

Credit: Photograph of Bronislava Nijinska, graduation picture, 1908. Digital image. Wikimedia Commons. 13 December 2015.

Pictures are hard. Unless you are a selfie fan or a social butterfly, a good snapshot may only come around once a decade. However, using dated pictures is a major problem on Tinder. When the person in the photo doesn’t match your listed age or your appearance in extra pics, potential matches may view you as untrustworthy and swipe left.

Schedule a photoshoot with a friend for new pictures.

Credit: Photographic portrait of nature photographer Ansel Adams. 1950. Wikimedia Commons. 6 March 2018.

If you need new pictures go on an outing with a friend and take dozens of photos to review. Pick the best options that reflect a bit about your personality, such as an enthusiasm for fine dining, and use them on your profile.

Tinder isn’t jail, but you still need a mugshot.

Credit: Elvis Mugshot. 1970. Wikimedia Commons. 7 March 2016.

Whether your trying to get a date or a job, a good headshot is a must. When updating your photos, make sure one focuses primarily on your face. It doesn’t have to be full Orange Is the New Black but should stick to the upper third of your body. Potential matches want to see your face. Give it to them in the first picture.

Props are great, except in your Tinder profile pictures.

Credit: Instagram @Tinder

A successful Tinder profile does require a bit of personality, and you definitely need to convey it anyway possible…except with too many props, such as shirts with a message, your car, a favorite gesture, a political button or pets. If someone misinterprets your meaning or takes a joke as a hard stance, you lose a match.

Assume that others will make assumptions.

Credit: Instagram @Tinder

Men and women are going to take in everything in your photos to determine your personality. If you give them too much data, there is too much to judge before a conversations start. Beyond mixed messages, you may also find the interior of the room is reviewed or the tidiness of your backdrop assessed. Make sure everything in your photo conveys the real you. 

Use all of the picture slots to increase matches.

Credit: Twitter @Tinder

If you were so excited to join Tinder that you skipped over adding extra pictures, go back and edit, edit, edit. Profiles with more photos see more matches. According to one Tinder study, women who upped pictures from one to three saw a 37 percent jump in matches while men saw an 82 percent increase.

Blank spaces were made for Taylor Swift songs, not your profile.

Credit: Instagram @taylorswift

If you can fill it out, do so. This includes specifying your location with a degree of accuracy. Some of your potential matches may be looking for city boys only while others don’t mind the suburbs. When you don’t specify your home base, you are limiting the field. 

Bios: Think tweets, not War and Peace.

Credit: Photo of the Book “War and Peace” by Leo Tolstoy. 20 May 2013. Wikimedia Commons. 22 May 2013.

Your bio provides you with a limited amount of space to make a killer first impression. The best way to do this is by keeping individual comments brief and charming. 

To be or not to be serious.

Credit: Hamlet – “To be or not to be, that is the question.” 1870. WikiMedia Commons. 15 June 2018.

It’s OK to specify passion topics, but equally okay to make a fun joking/not joking comment that reflects your interests, such as “If you think Darth Vader was misunderstood, swipe right.” 

Play with tone when introducing yourself in the bio.

Credit: Instagram @Tinder

Any single points about yourself should be succinct, but you can introduce them in paragraph form or create a spaced-out list that is more visually appealing. When you go through a dry spell, consider mixing up the format to improve scrolling potential.

Friends and family are a big part of your life but don’t need to be in all of your photos.

Credit: Tolee Fete in den fruher Sexhzigern. WikiMedia Commons. 11 July 2014.

After a starter mugshot, extra photos can be more freewheeling but should still highlight you. If your mom and/or kids are a major part of your life, include them in one picture to weed out bad matches but avoid using all of your snaps to show that you are social. You want to make new friends, not reinforce existing relationships.

Avoid telling your life story.

Credit: Books Books and More Books of Shelf Esteem. 1 November 2017. Wikimedia Commons. 3 November 2017.

See above. Friends and family are great, but don’t introduce Aunt Maria’s cousin in the bio or wax poetical about the little moments in life throughout. You want to provide succinct highlights and leave room for later conversation.

Tragedy and Tinder matches aren’t good bedfellows.

Credit: Instagram @Tinder

Emotional appeals are a mistake. Don’t lament the unfairness of the local dating scene or whine about your inability to meet new people in your profile or later messages. Instead, focus on what you want from Tinder – to meet new people.

Message your matches to get a conversation started.

Credit: Instagram @Tinder

Even if you match with someone you weren’t sure about swiping right for, invest some time in messaging. It helps you develop a rapport and feel for how to successfully convert a match to a date and may lead you to a winner. 

Ladies, Make the First Move.

Credit: Instagram @tinder

Women are less likely to instigate messaging on Tinder following a successful match according to research but both sexes need to step up to the plate. If you are interested in a man or woman, jump in and say, “Hello.”

Be persistent but not creepy.

Credit: Instagram @tinder

When you have a great match, give a little breathing room between a first message and subsequent check-ins but do follow up. A gentle nudge after 48 hours is good. Back-to-back “Did you get my messages?” messages are not.

Let’s not take this offline right now.

Credit: Instagram @tinder

Avoid immediately trying to get a fresh match to take a messaging session off Tinder and to traditional texting. Many people are concerned about share a personal number due to privacy concerns. No one wants a stalker. Only ask for additional contact info when you prepare for or finish a first meeting.

Even if your main goal on Tinder is to hookup, be a human first.

Credit: Instagram @tinder

If the only reason you want Tinder tips is to find a new hookup, that’s fine when your match is down for it. But don’t treat people you match with as your next booty call and navigate straight to pic requests and suggestive language without a bit of conversation. Consider it the equivalent of buying a drink at the bar before asking someone to go home with you.

Sales analogies are bad, but you need to close.

Credit: Friendship. Wikimedia Commons. 11 November 2005.

A great messaging session should lead to a meet-up. If things are stalling but you’re not ready for a big date, ask to continue the conversation over lunch, coffee or drinks. Try a pleasant, “Let’s continue this conversation over lunch this week. Does Monday or Wednesday work for you?” The assumption is a meeting will happen but the mechanics need to be sorted out. 

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Radical Feminists Have Seized Control of a Federal Building in Mexico in Protest of the Government’s Apathy Towards Rampant Femicide

Entertainment

Radical Feminists Have Seized Control of a Federal Building in Mexico in Protest of the Government’s Apathy Towards Rampant Femicide

Last week, Mexican feminist activists took over the National Human Rights Commissions federal building in a move to bring greater awareness to the scourge of gender-based violence and femicide that has racked Mexico for decades.

According to the federal Interior Secretariat, the statistics in Mexico have recently taken a turn for the worse.

Domestic violence against women has became an even more acute problem since the pandemic has forced women to stay insider with their abusers. Emergency distress calls reporting domestic violence have risen by 50%.

The occupation of the Human Rights building is just another chapter in the saga of the “Ni Una Menos” (Not One More Woman) movement, an anti-femicide collective born in Argentina that has steadily been gaining steam in Mexico since 2019.

In recent years, anti-femicide demonstrations have been sparked by various heinous crimes against women or girls that have been largely overlooked by law enforcement officials. 

Photo by Marcos Brindicci/Getty Images

Unfortunately, the government of Mexico has appeared to be apathetic to the wave of femicide that is overwhelming the women of their country.

Recently, when President Andrés Manuel López Obrador was asked to address Mexico’s gender violence epidemic, he demurred, stating that he didn’t “want femicide to detract” from the raffle his administration was holding for the sale of the presidential airplane.

As for the feminist activists at the heart of Ni Una Menos and the federal building occupation, the government’s failure to respond to anti-woman violence is the primary fuel for their anger. 

“We’re here so that the whole world will know that in Mexico they kill women and nobody does anything about it,” said Yesenia Zamudio to the LA Times. According to Zamudio, she is still seeking justice for the murder of her 19-year-old daughter four years ago.

The women of Mexico appear to be fed up, grasping at any and all tactics that have the potential to incite change on a grander scale.

Their tactics may seem dramatic to some, but it’s undeniable that they are no longer being ignored. As of now, the radical activists are pulling attention-grabbing stunts like decorating a portrait of Mexican Revolution leader Francisco Madero with lipstick and purple hair.

They’re also making headlines for vandalizing the federal building’s walls and splashing paint on the doors of the presidential palace.

One thing is for sure: something has to change. Otherwise, thousands of innocent women and girls will continue to be raped, abused, and murdered while their perpetrators escape with immunity. 

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Joe Biden Speaks Alongside ‘Fearless Fighter’ Kamala Harris In First Appearance And Recalls Her Family’s Immigrant Story

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Joe Biden Speaks Alongside ‘Fearless Fighter’ Kamala Harris In First Appearance And Recalls Her Family’s Immigrant Story

Chip Somodevilla / Gettycc

After weeks of speculation and anticipation, presidential candidate Joe Biden announced on Tuesday that he has officially picked his running mate.

In a history-making announcement, Biden revealed that he had tapped California Sen. Kamala Harris to be his VP Pick.

“I have the great honor to announce that I’ve picked @KamalaHarris — a fearless fighter for the little guy, and one of the country’s finest public servants — as my running mate,” Biden announced in a tweet.

On Wednesday, Biden held his first campaign event alongside running mate Kamala Harris in Delaware.

During their speeches, the two candidates wore masks and kept their distance in keeping with COVID-19 standards.

Speaking about his VP pick, Biden described Harris as coming from an “America’s story.” Biden described Harris as “a child of immigrants” who “knows personally how immigrant families enrich our country as well as the challenges of what it means to grow up Black and Indian-American in the United States of America,” he explained. “And this morning, all across the nation, little girls woke up, especially little Black and brown girls that feel overlooked and undervalued in their communities, but today — today just maybe they’re seeing themselves for the first time in a new way as president and vice presidents.”

In a speech of her own, Harris emphasized the importance of family and urged citizens to vote.  “We need a mandate that proves that the past few years do not represent who we are or who we aspire to be,” she said. “Joe likes to say that character is on the ballot. And it’s true,” she explained. “I’ve had a lot of titles over my career and certainly vice president will be great. But ‘Momala’ will always be the one that means the most.”

Harris’s nomination makes her the first Black and first Indian-American woman on either major party’s presidential ticket.

Harris is a former prosecutor from California who challenged Biden in her own presidential bid last year. Her nomination makes her the fourth woman to appear on a major presidential ballot. Before her, Geraldine Ferraro ran as a Democratic vice presidential nominee in 1984. In 2008, Republican Sarah Palin ran as a vice presidential nominee, later in 2016, Hillary Clinton became the Democratic presidential nominee.

Biden’s choice was one that has long been in the works. In March of this year, he revealed that he would make a point to have a woman as his running mate and in July he announced that he had narrowed his picks down to four Black women.

Kamala Harris was elected to Congress in 2016.

This has been Harris’ first term as a senator. Before, she served as the California attorney general. During her time as AG, Harris formed a lasting friendship with Biden’s late son Beau who was attorney general at the time in Delaware. Writing about Beau’s death, in her memoir The Truths We Hold, Harris recalled that “there were periods when I was taking the heat when Beau and I talked every day, sometimes multiple times a day,” she wrote in her memoir. “We had each other’s backs.”

Biden’s son Beau died in 2015 from brain cancer. Harris attended his funeral.

During his announcement, Biden mentioned Harris’ friendship with his son.

“I watched as they took on the big banks, lifted up working people, and protected women and kids from abuse,” Biden tweeted. “I was proud then, and I’m proud now to have her as my partner in this campaign.”

So far, it seems there are quite a bit of Harris x Biden supporters.

Fans were quick to give their support and applaud her candidacy.

In a tweet acknowledging her nomination, Harris wrote “@JoeBiden can unify the American people because he’s spent his life fighting for us. And as president, he’ll build an America that lives up to our ideals. I’m honored to join him as our party’s nominee for Vice President, and do what it takes to make him our Commander-in-Chief.”

Here’s to 2020 y’all. Get ready to make history.

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