Raise your hand if you and your parents party together. Raise your other hand if they can hang longer than you can, and refuse to go home without the traditional end-of-the-night visit to Jack In The Box. Well, let me start off by telling you that if you’re looking for that kind of story, this isn’t it.
As I type this, I still have trouble believing it myself. If you had told me that my dad would end up like this, I would say you were crazy! So let me start by setting the stage: try to imagine a 61 year-old man with a 70’s mustache (picture a typical Latino dad), wearing a Tejana hat, a bright red hawaiian shirt, sneakers, and a white fluffy boa around his neck. This is the outfit my dad was rocking while center stage at a Korean Karaoke bar, singing a Chente song at the top of his lungs while leading the longest conga line the bar has seen. Confetti, streamers, and glitter were flying everywhere. I mean, everywhere.
How did he end up like this? I’ll get to it in a minute, but the one thing you need to know about my dad is that he is most definitely NOT about the callejero life. He is the biggest dormilón, and will fall asleep whenever and wherever. He’s also known for saying things like, “¿Qué son estas horas de salir? No, no, ya es muy tarde” when it’s 8pm.
Well, his adventure all started right before the soccer series. You see, my dad is a HUGE soccer fan—the jump-up-from-your-seat-scream-and- wave-your-arms-at-the-TV kind of fan. The type of fan that cries during wins and losses. And as you might know, this year the best games are on before sunrise, so he has a million alarms that not only wake him up…but also wake up the rest of the house. My mom didn’t like that at all…so she took matters into her own hands by throwing away all of his alarm clocks. Savage, I know.
After feeling all of my mom’s fury and realizing his alarm clocks were missing, he came up with a not-so-genius plan: to stay up all night so he wouldn’t miss the big game. He thought his plan was bulletproof.
My parents started the night by watching novelas. Then, my dad decided to make things interesting by going to a bar for the first time in 20 years. No big deal, right? Wrong, that’s where he ran into my primo, Pancho and joined his compas. It wasn’t long before the texts started flowing with video proof that my ‘apa was officially the life of the party!
He was a completely different person! Could it be that he was actually having fun?
Then came all the pictures and selfies. Yes, my dad sent selfies—duck face, filters galore, and the no-big-deal-I’m-just-singing-karaoke selfie! He even took it to the next level and sent a Pelfie…(aka a panza selfie) SMH!
Oh, and how can I erase the image of my dad getting his disco on? Shout-out to my primo for sending me the video!
After hours of dancing disco, taking selfies, karaoking and having way too much fun, they ended their epic night at the Jack In The Box Drive-Thru and loading up on Sauced & Loaded Fries. My Dad and his new friends made it home at the break of dawn, and woke everyone up just in time for the game. Luckily for them, they brought enough breakfast for the whole family. Even my mom was happy. That night was a true golazo, and definitely one for the books!