6 Ways To Commit TV Adultery
The early phases of a relationship: texting cute emojis to each other, holding hands, *and* watching your favorite shows together are all enough to make you a human -insert heart emoji-.
The hard part when it comes to a relationship? Being honest and faithful…in not cheating on your bae with skipping on to the next episode! We all do it though. 😉 Here are some ways you can discreetly stream your favorite shows and get away with it.
1. On the Bus
This is rookie level when it comes to jumping on the next episode before your SO gets home. It’s as easy as plugging in your headphones and hearing the theme song take you away for the first half of your commute.
2. At the Gym
In between your tricep dips and squat workout, you can get some serious cardio, all you need is some duct tape, a tablet, and a treadmill and you can figure out who killed who on the season finale of your TV obsession while running. Who better to be your personal trainer than your favorite character?!
3. At the nail salon
It’s pedi time! Grab a seat and stream the *OMG* moment you have been waiting for. Just make sure you don’t drop your tablet or phone into the pedicure chair. Whoops!
4. At the grocery store
Mazapan candies? Check.
What else needs to be on your grocery list? Catching up on the latest episode of that ‘special something in your life’ (aka: your show)? Just hang your phone at an angle when you are pushing the grocery cart. Slick.
5. Walking the dog
The sounds of leaves crunching under your feet, Paco wagging his tail and…a character on your favorite show dropping some major CHISME leading to a plot twist!? You my friend just got hooked on this magical series and there is no turning back on your streaming – except when you ACTUALLY need to turn around because Paco needs to go to the restroom.
6. At the Movies
Bae may wonder about your frequent trips to the movies by yourself. Repeat these words: “I would like to expose myself to the world through cinema. Knowledge of current film could be an incredible asset to personality and mental development. I think this will make me a better person, and thus, better at loving you.” No human with a beating heart can turn that down. Pretty soon you’ll be sitting in a public space getting ahead on all your shows while everyone watches another action-romance where the leads kiss before they jump out of an exploding building – for like the ninth time. Just don’t get mantecas all over your phone from the buttery popcorn. Being a cochino could get you caught.
With unlimited data plans from AT&T, you can watch all your favorite shows virtually wherever. Streaming is the easy part – the hard part is keeping it a secret from bae which episode you’re *truly* on.
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