Culture

These Songs About Food Are Pretty Dirty And You Didn’t Even Realize It As A Kid

Credit: Pollito con Papas/Los Vaskez/Discos CBS International

Whether you are a Latino foodie or someone who likes to use food as code for carnal pursuits, we’ve got the perfect playlist for you. Get ready to get your groove on and don’t be surprised if you find yourself hungry for food – or a little sumthin’ sumthin’ if you know what we mean.

“Pollito con Papas” by Los Vaskez

pollito con papas
Credit: Pollito con Papas/Los Vaskez/Discos CBS International

We’re thinking the finger lickin’ good chicken legs may belong to a chick, not a chicken. Oh and doesn’t that pollo on the album cover look more like a turkey?

“La Mayonesa” by  Chocolate

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Credit: Mayonesa/Chocolate/Fonovisa

A group named Chocolate singing about mayonnaise? Estos mañosos are not singing about a condiment that you put on sandwiches. They’re going on and on about getting whipped up into a creamy and dizzying frenzy by a woman with a tattoo on her back. ?

“La Papa Sin Catsup” by Gloria Trevi

mas turbada que nunca
Credit: Más Turbada Que Nada/Gloria Trevi/BMG Ariola

Trevi uses her signature growl on this song from the album “Más Turbada Que Nunca” to explain that some dumbass has left her like fries without ketchup. But the best line has got to be when she says she was left like “un nopal sin lo baboso y el baboso eres tú!”

“Arroz con Habichuela” by El Gran Combo

Arroz con Habichuela El Gran Combo
Credit: Arroz con Habichuela/El Gran Combo/Norte

This song isn’t literally about rice and beans, it’s about “sabor, sabor, sabor de la vieja escuela, salsa caribeña, rumba, plena.”

“Caramelo y Chocolate” by Sexteto Juventud

Sexteto Juventud
Credit: La Magia del Sexteto/Sexteto Juventud/Velvet

The chocolate and caramel is actually a nena that is so freakin’ sweet she’ll put you in danger of dying from diabetes.

“Patacón Pisao” by Johnny Ventura

El Caballo Negro Johnny Ventura
Credit: El Caballo Negro/Johnny Ventura/Combo

So this dude, who is married to Josefa, only wants to get down with pescado and “patacón pisao pisao.” But Josefa is not puttin’ out the fish or smashin’ this guy’s banana. Pobrecito.

“Camarón Pelao” by Los Polifaceticos

ocho-palabras
Credit: EMI Televisa

Hmmm, maybe this one really is about shrimp “con salsita y con limon” because no man in his right mind really wants to compare any part of himself to a little shrimp, right?

“A Mi Me Gustan Las Pupusas”  by Grupo Invasion

A Mi Me Gustan Las Pupusas
Credit: A Mi Me Gustan Las Pupusas/Grupo Invasion/Photomaster Records

There is no denying that “pupusas con curtido y salsa de tomate” are delicious even if they aren’t served by a lady wearing an apron and tiny chonies.

“Caldo de Pollo” by Grupo Mojado

Grupo Mojado
Credit: Sueño y Realidad/Grupo Mojado/Fonovisa

These boys have the recipe for happiness. It doesn’t matter if you can’t pay the rent or your the love of your life just dumped you “con el caldo de pollo se quita todo mal.”

“La Arepa” by Aniceto Molina

La Arepa Aniceto Molina
Credit: Paquetazo de Colección/Aniceto Molina

“Margarita vende arepas calientes,” but she makes a special one that she doesn’t sell to just anyone. In order to let someone eat the special arepa, she has to be sure. That sounds like a lot of commitment for an arepa.

“La Tortilla” by Joe Cuba

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Credit: Recuerdos de Mi Querido Barrio/Joe Cuba/Tico Records

He’s singin’ about how much he wants to taste the tortilla, but I guess THAT tortilla is kind of hard to get.

“Salchica con Huevo” by Jimmy Sabater

Jimmy Sabater Solo
Credit: Solo/Jimmy Sabater/Tico Records

“Salchicha con huevo me pidio al amanecer.” No she didn’t! That means she spent the night and she still wanted sausage and eggs for breakfast. Naughty!

PLAY: Can You Guess The Song From The Music Video Screenshot?

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Here Are The Latino Sodas You Need To Try Based On Your Zodiac Sign

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Here Are The Latino Sodas You Need To Try Based On Your Zodiac Sign

nataliedrawn / topochicousa / Instagram

While the rest of society is tapping into how nature is a significant signaler to our emotional and spiritual needs, Latinos grew up finding meaning in every change in the wind, and every dream. We’re superstitious AF, but we’re also highly in tune with nature.

We’re also chugging soda and eating Goya beans from a can because it’s 2019 and we have full-time jobs and three other gigs to get to. Whatever you have on your plate today, these zodiac-aligned sodas are destined to be more effective for you, hijo de las estrellas.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Credit: steph_joachim / Instagram

Honey, the arrangement of the stars this summer is signaling you to stay off the ‘gram. Get away from social media and get out of your head. There’s nothing like a sweet, tropical Jupiña to take with you to the beach or mountains.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Credit: titan_doom / Instagram 

Taurus’s are often misunderstood as lazy, but the fact is that you are more in touch with your self and your needs than any other sign. You’re free from the shame of indulging as an act of self-love. So when you have a Malta, you definitely add condensed milk to it to maximize the effects of every self-treat. Plus, it reminds you of drinking Malta as a niño and feeling like you could kick your feet up with the beer-drinking adults.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Credit: ztiworoh / Twitter

You’re represented by celestial twins–signifying a range of meanings, primarily to represent your many interests. The story goes that the goddess had so many passions, she doubled herself to get it all done. Cuba’s Iron Beer hasn’t decided whether it’s root beer or cream soda, and that’s because, like you, it can be both. 

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Credit: jarritos / Instagram

This summer, your space is yours. Whether you’re staying home to reflect and refuel your tank or burning up that gasolina on the dance floor, Jarritos stay with you. Nourishing both your home realm and your social side will be important for you. Pro tip: spiked Jarritos is even better.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Credit: @coastward / Twitter

Leo, your allure could be spotted from a mile away. Inca Kola’s neon yellow bubble gum flavors will make you glow in the dark. Don’t play like that doesn’t sound like your dream.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Credit: topochicousa / Instagram

The energies of the lunar eclipse in Capricorn is still inspiring productivity like never before in you, hermit. Topo Chico is not a soda, per se, but it is a bubbly drink that you can enjoy anytime. Whether you’re drinking it straight from the bottle at your desk or adding your favorite fruits, Topo Chico is the only bubbly you need to keep you in the zone.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Credit: lovelovegoose / Instagram

Ooh, Libra, your summer is set to look very physically (read: so much sex) active. You always have many people vying for your attention, but as you work on building trust with your chosen partner, you’re going to need to hydrate. Materva is brewed with mate leaves, giving you a bit of caffeine (alongside 40 grams of sugar, but who’s counting) to fuel your love life.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Credit: CityandStateUS / Instagram

Like Mexican Coke, you, scorpion, have a cult following. But this month isn’t about what other people think of you. No matter the expectations of you, it’s time to turn inward and go back to old wounds that cause all the classic drama in your life. Don’t worry, when you let it go, you’ll still be a classic inside and out.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Credit: squirrelseatnuts / Instagram

Travels are in your future, Sagittarius. There’s nothing more germane to its country of origin than Colombiana soda. Its bubble gum scented cream soda flavors will always remind you of the importance of honoring the place you visit.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Credit: sidralmundet / Instagram

Fellow sea goats–it has been un mes tan pesado. No te preocupes–instead of trying to find out where you fit, it’s time to realize you belong everywhere in this world. You’re not just a Mundet, you’re an elusive green apple cider. Embrace your individuality. It will set you free.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Credit: sylver907 / Instagram

You, Aquarius, are in a humanitarian activist mode. With Puerto Rico’s police force firing tear gas and rubber bullets at protesters, PR’s favorite soda, Kola Champagne, will be fuel for your fire.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Credit: coco_ricooficial / Instagram

Our favorite water-lovers can take their game to the next level this summer with Coco Rico. This soda is here for you when you want to drink out of a coconut on the beach, but with more sugar and carbonation. It’s next-level water, básicamente.

READ: The Brief And Surprising History Of Tex-Mex Food That You’ve Never Heard

Cardi B Stands Behind Bernie Sanders Because Of His Desire To Fight For All People And Their Rights

Entertainment

Cardi B Stands Behind Bernie Sanders Because Of His Desire To Fight For All People And Their Rights

iamcardib / Instagram

Cardi B refuses to be boxed into any archetype. The Afro-Dominican rapper has used her platform in the past to talk about the injustices of America’s healthcare system. This Monday, she effectively put her weight behind Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders by telling her 6.7 million Twitter followers that she feels “really sad” about “how we let him down in 2016.”

Claro, Cardi B’s endorsement of the progressive Democratic socialist candidate has ignited a firestorm of responses from fans and haters alike. 

In a single tweet, Cardi acknowledged the authenticity of Bernie’s platform–which has remained consistent throughout decades of politics.

Credit: @iamcardib / Twitter

Often, voters feel isolated from politics because political speech is too pedantic to resonate with. Cardi was speaking from the heart of America when she said that Bernie’s issues are not a “front” for a campaign to win. She believes Bernie’s passion to creating a safer America for all is genuine.

Bernie Sanders narrowly lost the Democratic primary to Hillary Clinton in 2016.

Credit: @BernieSanders / Instagram

It’s no secret that, after Trump won, the Democratic party experienced a deep disillusionment over party ideals. Bernie brought a much more progressive stance than establishment Democrats, advocating for free healthcare as an American right, free college tuition and equality for all. The Senator thanked her in a tweet that read, “Thank you @iamcardib! Our fight for justice is far from over and we are not giving up.” 

The conversation continued after a critic pointed out that Cardi has once complained about high taxes.

Credit: @itixmix / Twitter

The Twitter user seemed to think that Cardi’s disdain for high taxes would be in direct conflict with Bernie Sanders’s outspoken platform to raise taxes on the rich to effectively redistribute to the masses in the form of free healthcare and education. He was wrong.

His didn’t get away with going up against Cardi and Bernie without a good dog walk from Latinas in charge.

Credit: @JulieSmithM / Twitter

It’s the name of the game–perception is a reality in politics. The perks of being a civilian are being able to say things like “que chinguen a su madre” to anyone who twists your words. 

Cardi clapped back by saying that she’s here for high taxes, but only if she can see her dollar effect positive change.

Credit: @iamcardib / Twitter

With a large chunk of our taxes going to the military, subsidizing the dying dairy and meat industries, and a clear lack of funds directed towards the humanitarian crisis on the border, Cardi wants someone in power who will improve the quality of life for as many Americans as possible. She wants to see what she’s paying for.

Of course, the sexism and racism came out to play in the comment threads.

Credit: @iamblakemarie / Twitter

This user claimed that “hood rats” are implicitly lacking the “mentality” to have political opinions. “I wish some people would stay in their lane,” is tantamount to someone like Trump telling The Squad to “go back” to “where they came from.” It implies that you’re born into the limits on your own agency, and it’s toxic thinking.

The Bardi Gang came through to defend Cardi’s right to use her political voice.

Credit: @Genadievna_ / Twitter

Cardi B is an Afro-Latina woman who worked her way to fame by stripping at the club across from her high school. Her work has invited criticism from conservative pundits, claiming her body and sex-positive messaging is anti-feminist. As a black woman taking up space in the world, everything she does is overanalyzed.

 They also offered her support amidst all the “hate.”

Credit: @TwinklingTania / Twitter

Other politically invested folks came through with comments like “Girl read about ELIZABETH WARREN,” and “Kamala2020 get down read up on her.” Sprinkled throughout were messages of support for Bernie, happy that 6.7 million followers could #FeelTheBern thanks to Cardi.

Cardi might be a celebrity, but she’s also a constituent who wants to see her taxes put an end to bankruptcy by medical and student loan debt.

Credit: @iamcardib / Instagram

With 2020 around the corner, campaign season is in full swing again. As always, we are mitú and we want everyone to educate themselves about every candidate and get out the vote!

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