food and drink

9 Mexican Food Items from Whole Foods that Deserve a ‘You Tried’ Sticker

Hey Whole Foods, we appreciate your attempts to make tasty and healthy Mexican food, but some of your products just aren’t cutting it.

There’s this “Mexican Grilled Corn.”

Just a few sprinkles of cheese?  You can see way too much corn for this to be a proper elote preparado. Every inch of those elotes should be lathered up.

There’s also this thing. It’s supposed to be a burrito.

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Credit: Andrew Z. / Yelp

Really, Whole Foods? That dead-looking burrito looks like it’s been decomposing for days.

Here are a few more “Burritos.”

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Credit: Michael M. / Yelp

Pre-wrapped and sitting under a heat lamp? Those are going to be some really dry burritos.

WTF is kaleamole and who thought it was a good idea?

??? #kaleamole

A photo posted by Alison Etherington (@alisonether) on

Guacamole is just fine as it is. Take not from the New York Times and their guacamole-pea abomination. Guacamole does not need fixing.

Actually, your kaleamole looks more appetizing than your regular guacamole.

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Credit: Marissa G. / Yelp

Never in my life have I seen guacamole with that kind of texture.

Look at this sad-looking Mexican lunch.

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Credit: Pete C. / Yelp

Every last bit of this meal seems questionable. Romaine lettuce? What is happening to the tomatoes and what kind of cheese is on the beans? What is lurking inside those enchiladas?

But wait – they’ve taken black beans to the “next level.”

Just kidding. Why would you do that? What if we’re dipping our chips into beans… that’s like some weird form of snack cannibalism.

READ: Proof All These Trendy Hipster Foods Were Basically Invented By Our Latina Grannies

There are also Brown Rice Tortillas… just let that sink in.

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Credit: wholefoodsmarket.com

Rice goes in the burrito so why make the tortilla out of it? Is whole wheat not trendy anymore?

READ: 11 Times Starbucks Butchered Latino Names Like It was Nothing

What the hell even are Sprouted Ancient Grains?

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Credit: wholefoodsmarket.com

Corn, flour, or wheat. Those are all the tortilla flavors you need.

Oh, did you know some Whole Foods markets have a taco stand?

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Credit: Vatche K. / Yelp

WHERE’S THE TAQUERO?! Watching the taquero hook up your tacos is the best part!

Hey, Whole Foods…

GI1yDHQ

Have you tried any of these Whole Foods items? Share this story with your friends and find out what they think.

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How Growing Up with a Tico Dad is Anything but Basic

#mitúVOICE

How Growing Up with a Tico Dad is Anything but Basic

While everyone else watched The Crocodile Hunter, you were raised by one.
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Credit: reptilefacts/tumblr

He’s got the blowgun to prove it.

That “hunter” gave you a machete for your 5th birthday present.

Inle Lake, Burma (731)

Mamá loved that one.

Read: What You Say vs. What Mamá Hears

Every wall in the house was a different color.
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And he can’t stand to be in your white-washed apartment. Is he allergic to blanco?

He regularly tricked you into eating the spiciest chiles. 

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I swear that was child abuse.

Every meal had to include rice and beans…

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Even breakfast when all you wanted was pancakes…just once.

The house smelled like fresh food every hour of the day.

https://instagram.com/p/8orbcsEXMB/?tagged=costaricanfood

If you recommended eating out, dad looked at you like you were crazy.

READ: Latino Dishes that’ll Cure Anything

And the house also smelled like rotting food every hour of the day.

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How did he not notice?

The yard looked like a jungle.
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If you suggested weeding, he got teary.

CHECK OUT: Things That Embarrassed Us About Our Culture, But Now Make Us Proud

His childhood stories sounded like Mowgli’s memoirs.
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“…and when I got to the top of the mango tree, there was a viper waiting for me!”

And your suffering NEVER, EVER could compare. 

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Credit: 20th Century Fox / myshipperheart / Tumblr

He’s survived flesh eating caterpillars and a volcanic eruption…he’s not impressed you broke a nail.

What stunts does your Tico padre pull? Let us know in the comments below and be sure to share on Facebook and Twitter!