Culture

11 Ways ‘Primer Impacto’ Ruined Our Childhood

Credit: Primer Impacto / Univision

A television news program? Heck, I’d call Primer Impacto the source of some of your deepest childhood fears because…

You didn’t dare wander into the night.

CREDIT: UNIVISION NOTICIAS/ YOUTUBE

The Chupacabras’ thirst for blood didn’t stop with domestic animals. Come to think abut it, this was probably some conspiracy among mamás to keep kids from going out to play.

There was no way you were visiting abuelita’s native Michoacán.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

Abuelita’s birthday was not a strong argument against giant crocodiles having 11 year-old boys for dinner. Punto.

You never wanted to see the doctor.

CREDIT: UNIVISION NOTICIAS/ YOUTUBE

Because you know, some of them were haunted.

READ: Fear: The Oldest Form of Latino Discipline

You realized The Exorcist was not just a movie.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

Demons were real and they could possess you any day.

You feared historical heroes.

CREDIT: RASTA CUERO/ YOUTUBE

When former Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez exhumed Simon Bolivar’s body, he unleash el libertador’s curse over the ENTIRE country.

The end of the world was always near.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

…Or aliens were coming to abduct you. Either way your sweet nights of sleep were over.

We realized dogs weren’t man’s best friend.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

And your mom would not allow you near one.
READ: 13 Ways Mom Put her Chanclas to Good Use

You were terrified after dark.

CREDIT: UNIVISION NOTICIAS/ YOUTUBE

The favorite hour for women ghosts to come out.

You developed serious ophiophobia.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

All of the sudden you NEEDED a bunker bed, you know, to keep snakes from crawling into your bed and struggling you.

You learned zombie invasions were real.

CREDIT: PRIMER IMPACTO/ YOUTUBE

You were terrified of going to funerals.

But most of you wondered…

CREDIT: TVCAPSHD/ YOUTUBE

How were these two able to sleep at night?

Hit the share button below if you remember being terrified of Primer Impacto when you used to watch with your parents.

From Being Brutally Honest About Her Insecurities To Embarrassing Her, Only Sisters Can Get Away With These Things In Public

Culture

From Being Brutally Honest About Her Insecurities To Embarrassing Her, Only Sisters Can Get Away With These Things In Public

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As far as siblings go, the special bond between sisters is one that’s hard to explain. If you have a sister, then you know that there are certain things you can get away with doing to her that none of your other friends would ever let you live down, or forget. Some of us have messed with our hermanitas, done the unforgivable, and lived to tell the tale.

Here are some things you’ve probably done that, otherwise, would have ended some friendships.

1.Tell her you hate how she looks.

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Credit: Saturday Night Live, NBC

Friends don’t let friends look like basura in public. To some, you’d be called a hater for noticing that they’re slacking in the fashion department. We love our sisters, and it’s because we love them that we want to make sure that they always feel—and look—their best. While others might hold a grudge, with your sis you know it’s all love.

2. Get into a physical fight.

Credit: Modern Family, ABC

If you catch these hands with anyone else, it’s usually the end of a relationship. But with a sister, that’s all just a part of life, even if Mamí hates it.

3. Steal.

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Money, clothes, shoes, food—what’s hers is mine, right? Although there are times that you can’t stand what she’s wearing, it only makes sense that somebody related to you has such great taste. (At least sometimes.)

4. Eat her food without being expected to pay her back.

Orange Is The New Black Latina GIF
Credit: Giphy

You know how they say money is the root of all problems? Some friendships add up to nothing more than nickles and dimes, if you catch our drift. But when you grew up under the same roof, chances are your taste buds are pretty in sync. What good is having a sister if she doesn’t read your mind and order that one other thing you’ve been eyeing on the menu?

5. Encroach on her “me” time and personal space.

Credit: The Voice, NBC

Like climbing into her bed and sleep with the lights in after a scary movie. When you can’t stomach something so terrifying, but are a little too embarrassed to squeeze into  a parent’s bed, snuggling up to your sister is the perfect protection. Plus, you can sacrifice her to the monsters in the closet or under the bed if anything goes south.

5. Get her in trouble with the law…almost.

Credit: Giphy

If you haven’t done it yet, you’ll do it soon. It might not be right, but in the right situation, there’s only one person you could pull this off with—without getting in too much trouble. Whether you’re an older or younger sister, an old license or beat-up school I.D. can get your favorite plus one in on the action. It’s especially helpful for sisters who love doing just about anything together.

6. Play wingman and get it wrong.

Credit: Jane The Virgin, the CW

Nobody knows you like your sister, supposedly. She’s seen you through your first infatuations, rebounds, and most devastating heartbreaks. Who better to introduce you to a new amiguito at the bar or curate the cutest dating app profile pictures for your new profile? At least until they ghost you…

7. Fight and act like you never fought.

Credit: Marvel Studios

Outside of familia, that’s considered fake AF. But with a sister, you can fight about anything from this list, and chances are that five minutes later you’ll be wandering into each other’s rooms to share nail polish and binge Netflix. Few things are worth fighting over with familia.

8. Spread lies.

Credit: Giphy

Growing up and even now, a sister can be your closest confidant and biggest cover-up. When you’re not in class like you said you were when you spent the money on some pendejadas when you said you wouldn’t, and yes, even when you get back together with that person your mom hates, your sister will be the one to have your back. And when the time comes, you’ll do the same for her and make sure you’ve both got the story straight.

9. Challenge her with the truth.

Credit: Huffington Post

We all hate to be told about ourselves. While tough love may end in heartache in other relationships, with sisters, being slapped back into reality with some truth is a blessing in disguise.

10. Expose her secrets.

Giphy.com

In friendships of all kinds, we expect to be able to talk about the hard things and not be judged. A sister’s room especially should be an open door, a safe space. But, there are times when your sis shares something with you that could be dangerous to herself or others, and you have to break that seal of confidentiality to keep her safe. Some of us have said goodbye to old friends by putting their well-being first and having it be as interpreted as nosiness. Luckily, being lovingly nosy comes with the sister territory.

11. Ignore her.

Credit: Giphy

Flaking, being left on red, or forgetting to show up to things would bother any person. When it comes to your sister, the fact that you know you’ll talk to her or see her soon puts less pressure on both of you to keep up appearances and expectations.

12. Gossip about her.

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Credit: Jenny Lorenzo

Whether you are the oldest or the youngest, sometimes your sister just gets on your freaking nerves. At a certain point, you have to tell somebody! The good part about gossiping about your hermana is chances are, whatever you’re saying to somebody else is probably something you’ve already said to her face.

13. Act differently around her.

Credit: Giphy

We all have an outside persona that we project to the rest of the world. Our coworkers, friends, and classmates know one side of us, while our sisters know another. Instead of being called two-faced, with our best friends since birth we get to be our true selves with no negative consequences.

How Latino Parents Always Got Spooked Out During Halloween Because Of ‘Primer Impacto’

no pos wow

How Latino Parents Always Got Spooked Out During Halloween Because Of ‘Primer Impacto’

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“Primer Impacto” is a staple TV program for most Latino families. Your parents were constantly scared by what loco things were happening in the world, but even more so around Halloween time. What if the Chupacabra wanted to suck your blood because you were out trick-or-treating?! Uh, sure Mom. Here are some ways your parents probably tried to get you to stay in on Halloween night when you were a kid. You can thank “Primer Impacto” for that.

Halloween has been and will always be the holiday of the devil.

Now, our parents aren’t against all holidays. On the contrary, love going all-out to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior. They just aren’t too excited about celebrating a holiday they feel is associated with evil. No padre, Halloween is more about the candy and costumes, depending on your age.

They always had so many suggestions about what you wore for the big night out.

Like, a nun is cool and all. We definitely respect them. However, you could never be a genie or a cheerleader for Halloween. It was too risque of an outfit. Mom prefer you dressing up for something more along the lines of a nun.

La Llorona was going to come out and get you.

Of course we all knew that La Llorona was used to keep us in check, somehow we really believed it around Halloween. Maybe it was because our parents were always so sure that she was spotted around that time of year. Literally, any missing child reported on “Primer Impacto” was taken by La Llorona.

El Chupacabra would be lurking in the bushes.

El Chupacabra basically kept “Primer Impacto” in business with its constant story features. That’s just a fact, okay? That show was likely the reason that our parents and abuela were convinced that it was going to come out to get us on All Hallow’s Eve.

You have to go in a group with your primos and hermanos for safety.

Going from house to house with your friends? Fingers crossed your parents were chill and let you do that. However, if they watched María Celeste Arrarás and Myrka Dellanos report on the OMG moments of that day then that was not the case. Instead of friends, you had to round up a group of your primos, tíos and siblings to come be your candy squad.

Your parents thought they were part of the TSA when reviewing your candy bag.

Speaking of candy, good luck trying to eat even 80 percent of your candy stash. Our parents always worried that the candy would be laced with drugs or had a needle in it. You always had to wait a good half hour for them to examine your candy bag before you could even have your first bite of that Kit Kat bar.

You are going to have cavities after eating all that candy.

Alright, so your parents give you back your stash of candy but hold on for un segundo. Better pick your favorite treats because madre and padre believed eating all that candy would instantly give you 24 cavities by the next day. That means they would take the rest and hide in a way of rationing it out.

READ: 11 Ways ‘Primer Impacto’ Ruined Our Childhood

What tales did your parents tell you about going out on Halloween? Tell us in the comments and share this article with your friends and family!

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