If there’s one thing you don’t do in life, it’s dump a Latina. Seriously. We can be über passionate lovers, but we use that same intensity to make you regret ever leaving us.
We immediately release our frustration at the gym and work on getting hotter and post a bikini shot for you to see ?.
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You’ll realize you’re missing out on sexiest thing you ever had.
We drop cryptic Facebook statuses.
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Forget sappy quotes, we drop indirectas, just like mom taught us . You know things like, “no dejes que las personas te mantengan en el piso cuando puedes volar” to make you feel more of a tool.
We experiment because sexuality can be fluid.
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And we’ll make sure you hear about it to make your blood boil with jealousy.
We start hanging with a new, sexy squad of girls you’ve never met.
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Aka, other hot single girls. We turn heads everywhere we go.
And of course we flood our Instagram accounts with super sexy pics from our nights out.
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And post selfies of us getting bottle service at clubs courtesy of super hot guys.
We appear where you least expect it, being all sexy and shit.
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Family reunion? ✔️ Church? You bet. You’re niece’s birthday party? Like oh hey, I didn’t know you’d be here.
We reconnect with old guy friends – the ones you were jealous of.
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They are nicer than you, after all.
But I’ll save my first post-you hookup for that friend of yours who always flirted with me.
You were right, he did have a crush on me.
And we always keep in touch with a mutual friend who always keeps me updated – even after you block me.
We’re always watching ?.
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