Our Moms Tried Literally Every Diet, But Did It Occur to Them They Could Lose Weight By Going to the Gym?
Khloé Kardashian is getting all the glory for discovering waist training. Sorry homegirl, our moms did it first, along with these insane diets, because they were desperate to lose a pound or two…
Here’s la faja original.
https://instagram.com/p/8nqGhhzIZJ/
What new waist training? Our moms have been using these their whole lives and were not subtle about it at all…
They’d tell their comadres…
…that they look like stuffed tamales.
AND their fajas were anything but a basic waist trainer. They wore semi-permanent plaster ones.
It looked like the most painful rib-breaking device.
They did everything to sweat the fat off…
https://instagram.com/p/8nmuPanADq/
Without working out.
Including electrocuting themselves to gain muscles.
Mini Electronic Body Muscle Butterfly Massager Slimming Vibration Fitness MY https://t.co/s8FKN5573n pic.twitter.com/fkmEHqanaY
— Ulrica Weale (@UlricaWeale) December 19, 2015
Who said this was a good idea?
They didn’t stop at waist training. They also wrapped plastic around their toes.
Keep Fit Slimming Health Style New Good Silicon Magnetic Foot Massage Toe Ring http://t.co/AlkoXWzKPt pic.twitter.com/gX752XIVE8
— 2Sell2Buy.com (@2Sell2Buy) August 27, 2015
How did they ever think a magnet wrapped around their fat toe would make them lose weight?!
They stapled – STAPLED – this plastic tab to their tongues to keep them from eating…which could have been done without this barbaric device.
Then they learned they could still chew their food from the side of their mouth. #CheatingTheSystem ?
And popped purple pills like no other.
Não dá pra perder! Tudo Sobre o OxyElite Pro | Uma BOMBA Para Perder Peso? Vem conferir: http://t.co/7nQagrD6QU pic.twitter.com/zsXKA27RKg
— Edu Soares (@EduDuud) March 14, 2014
Because these pills promised to suppress their appetite, accelerate their heart rate, increase energy levels… None of which sound safe or FDA approved.
Only Latina moms would trust gold pills.
Like c’mon! Everything about this looks fake.
To get a body like Maribel Guardia’s, they’d drink her magic, fat-burning tea.
Because if her picture was on it, it meant it was real.
They were cult followers of this green label.
They bought this stuff in bulk and swore by it.
This was their reaction anytime they found a new diet recipe on YouTube:
“CUANDO TU MAMA MIRA RECETAS EN YOUTUBE”
JAJAJAJAJAJAJA COMPARTE! ❤️
http://on.fb.me/1HZK5bX
#Mituverano.
Posted by Mario Aguilar on Thursday, July 9, 2015
They fell for la dieta de alcachofa.
A magic potion you put into your food that makes fat disappear.
And weird shakes as meal replacements…
That’s all they were eating, of course they were going to lose weight.
But did they ever think to work out?
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