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No One Knows Hot to Get Rid of Haters Like Curanderas

By Elisa Osegueda October 16, 2015 at 4:50 pm

Curanderas are notorious for using unconventional techniques to cure just about everything, even those shady haters. This is how they do it…

Hierbas are their go-to remedy.

https://instagram.com/p/6qOgZioQHx/

Like all women, curanderas also love shiny rocks.

ofreciendo limpieza espiritual deshacerse de los enemigos y la negatividad

A photo posted by @psychic_curandera on Sep 24, 2015 at 3:13pm PDT

They spark scented incense.

#copal #ancestors #smoke #smells #curandera #indigenous #goodvibes #friday

A video posted by Vanessa Gonzalez (@vanessuhhh) on Aug 7, 2015 at 8:43pm PDT

Mi Abuelita la Curandera. Love when Tita comes over. #nuestramedicina #curandera

A video posted by Wolf Montoya (@wolfs_wild_years) on Jul 22, 2015 at 3:07pm PDT

A little egg rubbing never hurt anyone…

I'll be okay my grandma rubbed an egg on me @hispanogram Spiritual Egg Cleansing from Negative Spells and Energies #Despojo #Limpia #cleanse #latinotricks

A photo posted by ⭐Hispanogram™ (@hispanogram) on Mar 22, 2015 at 6:32am PDT

Curanderos also use sound as a form of healing.

https://instagram.com/p/8gqRgrkCi8/?tagged=limpia

Oh, and they love the use of fire.

You know you're Mexican when… #paisa #mexican #homeremedies #brujeria #limpia #lol #bonez #hesmonchosboss #seniority

A photo posted by Omar Porcayo (@porcayo1985) on Sep 30, 2015 at 10:23am PDT

Here’s how a full on limpa looks like:

Credit: JinxNoMore7/YouTube

Click the share button below to let your friends know how they can get rid of their haters.

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Curanderas Rituals

13 Times Mom Made You More Sick by Taking You to a Curandera

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13 Times Mom Made You More Sick by Taking You to a Curandera

By Karen Anzoategui January 18, 2016 at 8:45 am

BY Karen Anzoategui | January 18, 2016 AT 8:45 am

1. At birth.

Baby boy gets so restless when he has hiccups ?? #fetalmovements #cute #baby #wave #babyboy #bumplove #love #bp #pregnancy #pregnant #pregolicious #tag4likes #tagforlikes #t4l #instagood #instadaily #instalikes

A video posted by @queenmama20 on Jan 11, 2016 at 8:14pm PST

Credit: @mommy_andme2016 / Instagram

She wasn’t cursed for 9 months, she was pregnant with you.

2. When she thought we were cursed by Satan.

Credit: Seinfeld / NBC

That time you drank the Drano and you started foaming at the mouth. She thought it was evil spirits taking over your body.

3. Is this a yolk?

4. When she gave us foochi limpias.

5. After our first love…spell.

Rn ?? #aria #lucyhale #montgomery #pll #prettylittleliars #sad #crying #school #nap #funny #meme #relatable #tumblrposts #girlythings #hashtag #loney #music #relatableposts #rip #school

A photo posted by #username (@coldtoed) on Jan 11, 2016 at 8:33pm PST

Credit: @coldtoed / Instagram

You were drowning in teenage-heartbreak-tears and she wanted to bond with you so she decided to buy a spell and curse your bae. She probably should have sent you to a therapist.

6. When we were trippin’.

Credit: endearingyouare / Tumblr

That time you hit your head and started hallucinating and your mom thought you were having ‘visions.’

READ: No One Knows Hot to Get Rid of Haters Like Curanderas

7. After a simple stomachache.

Credit: SpongeBob Squarepants / Nickelodeon

Food poisoning was more fun when your mom knew it was empacho.

8. Every time we got wheezy.

Credit: jack-skellignton / Tumblr

That time your mom thought your coughing was sent from the negative energy of the landlord…turns out it was mold! #KnowYourRights

9. When we were poppin’ and lockin’.

Credit: kellymagovern / Tumblr

That time you broke your leg playing soccer and she was tried to pop it back into place. #Limpy

10. Mal ojo, oh no!

Credit: Bridesmaids / Universal Pictures

It wasn’t a mal ojo, it was chorro.

11. For being a chillon/a.

12. Salvia-Me Dios!

13. Para sacarnos el demonio…

Credit: mr-crooked / Tumblr

Because you were too young to smoke, but the perfect age to be possessed by a demon. #pinkeye

Hit that share button if you were ever taken to a curandera for something ridiculous.

Notice any needed corrections? Please email us at corrections@wearemitu.com

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Curandera family Rituals

No One Knows Hot to Get Rid of Haters Like Curanderas

No One Knows Hot to Get Rid of Haters Like Curanderas

Hierbas are their go-to remedy.

Credit: bycrystalp/Instagram Herbs are rubbed up and down the body to help cure illnesses… You can't leave Ecuador without a classic #Limpia! #TeamDE #FeelAgainInEcuador #Cuenca A photo posted by EcuadorTravel (@ecuadortravel) on Sep 25, 2015 at 8:57pm PDT

Credit: ecuadortravel/Instagram Or cleanse you of evil vibes your enemies send you.

Like all women, curanderas also love shiny rocks.

Credit: curandera_psiquico/Instagram They turn to gemstones to cleanse spirits. They EVEN claim to know how to exterminate bad relationships.

They spark scented incense.

Credit: vanessuhhh/Instagram Which is used to cleanse your aura and your surroundings.

They use the power of touch.

Credit: wolfs_wild_years/Instagram They use their magic touch to relieve tension, bad vibes, and realign your chakras.

A little egg rubbing never hurt anyone…

Credit: hispanogram/Instagram About that time #Huevo #PaLasCokas #PaLosHaters #Lmao #TGIF #Limpia A photo posted by Cheers To The Future? (@royal_benz_nokturnalcc) on Oct 2, 2015 at 3:06pm PDT

Credit: xhico/Instagram That’s how they really get down. Eggs are considered a symbolism of life. As gross as it sounds, they rub eggs around your body to absorb all negative energy and illnesses.

Curanderos also use sound as a form of healing.

Credit: museodeloro/Instagram #mexico #colima #suchitlan #limpia #chaman #gopro #fisheye #videoday #culture #tuslabioshermosa A video posted by Oscar A. Hernandez (@shawqwerty) on Sep 4, 2015 at 2:56pm PDT

Credit: shawqwerty/Instagram Like the beating of drums or the sound created by rattles.

Oh, and they love the use of fire.

Credit: porcayo1985/Instagram You know, to cure things like too much ear wax.

Here’s how a full on limpa looks like:

Credit: JinxNoMore7/YouTube

Click the share button below to let your friends know how they can get rid of their haters.

Share this story with all of your friends by tapping our little share buttons below!

13 Times Mom Made You More Sick by Taking You to a Curandera

13 Times Mom Made You More Sick by Taking You to a Curandera

1. At birth.

2. When she thought we were cursed by Satan.

3. Is this a yolk?

Credit: @kannette9 / Instagram The time you needed a limpia because you had a fever and every huevo used broke on you. It looked like you were baptized in huevos … and your fever started cooking the eggs. #SunnysideUp READ: Latina Ex-Girlfriends Know Where to Hit Their Exes Where It Hurts

4. When she gave us foochi limpias.

Credit: @dadianacabrera / Instagram That time in high school when you got a deep limpia because your mom swore that flu was brujeria and you stunk so bad for two days, you missed homecoming — AND you were still sick!

5. After our first love…spell.

6. When we were trippin’.

7. After a simple stomachache.

8. Every time we got wheezy.

9. When we were poppin’ and lockin’.

10. Mal ojo, oh no!

11. For being a chillon/a.

Credit: @mibella_Vita / Instagram When you were throwing a fit and making a scene at Target and she took your butt to la curandera but you really had an ear infection.

12. Salvia-Me Dios!

Credit: @simbaxvideo / Instagram When you started having allergies and she burned sage…

13. Para sacarnos el demonio…

Hit that share button if you were ever taken to a curandera for something ridiculous.

Share this story with all of your friends by tapping our little share buttons below!

Credit: bycrystalp/Instagram
Herbs are rubbed up and down the body to help cure illnesses…

You can't leave Ecuador without a classic #Limpia! #TeamDE #FeelAgainInEcuador #Cuenca

A photo posted by EcuadorTravel (@ecuadortravel) on Sep 25, 2015 at 8:57pm PDT

Credit: ecuadortravel/Instagram
Or cleanse you of evil vibes your enemies send you.

Credit: curandera_psiquico/Instagram
They turn to gemstones to cleanse spirits. They EVEN claim to know how to exterminate bad relationships.

Credit: vanessuhhh/Instagram
Which is used to cleanse your aura and your surroundings.

Credit: wolfs_wild_years/Instagram
They use their magic touch to relieve tension, bad vibes, and realign your chakras.

Credit: hispanogram/Instagram

About that time #Huevo #PaLasCokas #PaLosHaters #Lmao #TGIF #Limpia

A photo posted by Cheers To The Future? (@royal_benz_nokturnalcc) on Oct 2, 2015 at 3:06pm PDT

Credit: xhico/Instagram
That’s how they really get down. Eggs are considered a symbolism of life. As gross as it sounds, they rub eggs around your body to absorb all negative energy and illnesses.

Credit: museodeloro/Instagram

#mexico #colima #suchitlan #limpia #chaman #gopro #fisheye #videoday #culture #tuslabioshermosa

A video posted by Oscar A. Hernandez (@shawqwerty) on Sep 4, 2015 at 2:56pm PDT

Credit: shawqwerty/Instagram
Like the beating of drums or the sound created by rattles.

Credit: porcayo1985/Instagram
You know, to cure things like too much ear wax.

Credit: @kannette9 / Instagram
The time you needed a limpia because you had a fever and every huevo used broke on you. It looked like you were baptized in huevos … and your fever started cooking the eggs. #SunnysideUp

READ: Latina Ex-Girlfriends Know Where to Hit Their Exes Where It Hurts

Credit: @dadianacabrera / Instagram
That time in high school when you got a deep limpia because your mom swore that flu was brujeria and you stunk so bad for two days, you missed homecoming — AND you were still sick!

Credit: @mibella_Vita / Instagram
When you were throwing a fit and making a scene at Target and she took your butt to la curandera but you really had an ear infection.

Credit: @simbaxvideo / Instagram
When you started having allergies and she burned sage…