Entertainment

Here’s What 2017’s Going To Look Like According To Your Sign

Bueno, 2017 has started, and with it, brand-new possibilities for success, amor, money and happiness — that is, unless you let your sign’s shortcomings mess up your game plan. Here’s what the stars advise for you in this new year.

Aries

CREDIT: imageflip

This is your year! The world will fall at your feet and it’s about damn time. You’re going to have to put all you’ve learned in past years into play, so avoid being impulsive and control your mal genio or it’ll get the best of you. Time to say adios to those who’ve annoyed you, sent you bad vibes or done you wrong. Lo que no sirve que no estorbe.

Taurus

taurus

Gemini

geminis

Cancer

cancer

Leo

leo

Virgo

virgo

Libra

libra

Scorpio

escorpio

Sagittarius

sagitarious

Capricorn

capricorn

Aquarius

acuario

Pisces

piscis

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Which WWE Finishing Move are you Based on your Horoscope?

Entertainment

Which WWE Finishing Move are you Based on your Horoscope?

2020 feels like being thrown off the top of the Hell in a Cell structure and crashing through the announcement table, fam. It’s been painful and disorienting. Even if we don’t know where this wild year will lead us, at the very least we still have the release of WWE 2K Battlegrounds to look forward to. Can I have a Yassss [in Spanish]? Thank you. That was beautiful. 

(Scroll to the bottom to check out the WWE 2K Battlegrounds trailer!)

While 2020 figures itself out, at the very least we can unleash some madrasos on our friends and primos while playing this high flying, face smashing, adrenaline exploding brawl-style arcade game full of WWE Superstars and Legends. A HUEVO! But if you find it difficult to decide which finishing move you’re going to decimate your friends or primos with, NO WORRIES, baby…you can always look to the cosmos – because this article is going to tell you which WWE Finishing move you are based on your horoscope AND how you can send your opponents crying to their mamas. 

ARIES

Aries. You’re Randy Orton’s RKO. But, Aries. Come on. You already knew that, fam. You’re calculated. Aggressive. Assertive. You’ll run into your friend at the supermarket and they’ll be telling you how their mom is doing good and how she’s around the corner getting some hair dye and BAM! RKO! You’ll drop that person right in the middle of the cereal aisle because you spotted them an elote that one time and they never paid you back. Aries, you’re wild. And that spontaneity will serve you well when you play WWE 2K Battlegrounds.

TAURUS

Taurus, you love beautiful things and you’re a very committed person – meaning, you just don’t let things GO! Taurus, it’s obvious. You’re Charlotte Flair’s Figure 8. Your finisher is beautiful. Stunning. And when you got that baby locked in, Taurus, you’ll never let go! You’re like my mom who never forgave me that one time I ordered pizza when she was about to reheat calabazas she made a week ago. So lock in that Figure 8, Taurus. Make your enemies throw their controllers in anger.

GEMINI

Dear, Gemini, of course you’re going to drop two finishers on somebody. You’ve got that crazy cosmic duality in you, fam. This means you’re definitely Sasha’s Back Stabber AND Bank Statement. When people play WWE 2K Battlegrounds with you, they’ll think they’re only playing a game. Ba-HAHAHAH! This ain’t a game to you! You came to win, Gemini. But, please Gemini, do us all a favor. Don’t play with llorones. Cause you’re gonna make someone cry with those moves.

CANCER

Cancer, your finishing move is Keith Lee’s Big Bang Catastrophe. You have great emotional depth. You’re sensitive. So it makes sense that your move should rock your opponent to their core, while bringing the two of you close. Cancer, when you drop that Big Bang Catastrophe, you are going to bond with your opponent so much. As their back slams onto the mat and you land, full-weight, on top of them…you’ll be closer than arroz y frijoles. Or like asada on tortilla. Or any other delicious food pairings you prefer. Cancer, thank you for caring so much about how you destroy your amigos and siblings. 

LEO

Leo, this is your world, baby. You’re the king of the ring, which means, obvio, your finisher is The Undertaker’s Tombstone Piledriver. This is a legendary move. People don’t come back from this. One time I was watching the Undertaker deliver the Tombstone Piledriver on TV and from behind I heard my mom say to me, “Ese hombre no tiene madre.” I turned to my mom and said…”No. El Undertaker no tiene madre. Viene del infierno.” My mom gasped. She’d never met someone que no tiene madre before. So, when you’re playing that WWE 2K Battlegrounds, te suplico…take it easy on the other players. The Undertaker is not like the rest of us. 

VIRGO

Virgo, you’re a perfectionist. You’re detail oriented. Your finisher is Drew McIntyre’s Future Shock DDT. This is a precision move. When you were a kid in line to hit the piñata, everyone swung blindfolded with all their might and made a fool of themselves. But not you, Virgo. You were solving formulas and equations in your head. By the time they handed you the palo to swing at the piñata, you knew the precise moment to swing, exploding that piñata and catching everyone off-guard, including your tío who was previously holding the piñata rope and subsequently hanging from the roof of the garage. Drop that DDT, baby. Drop it like it’s hot.

LIBRA

Libra you’re all about harmony and human connection. AWWW…Libra, eres muy cute. Except for when you’re making human connection by using Becky Lynch’s Disarm-Her finishing move to dislocate your opponent’s shoulder. Libra, while most people make connections by holding hands, or a simply high 5’ing… you don’t. Because your idea of connection is grabbing someone by the wrist, like Becky Lynch, and trying to yank their arm out. Libra, use this move in WWE 2K Battlegrounds to disable that cousin who taunted you saying, “You fight like a girl.” After you break their arm in the video game, let them know…”You’re damn right I do.”

SCORPIO

Scorpio, te vale madre what others think of you. You’re a Stone Cold Stunner, baby. You do things como te dé la gana. So when you step into the ring, you make your own rules. When your friend says your playing is “weak” – STUNNER. When someone tries to pick up a chair in the game – STUNNER. When your prima says, “I’m gonna pause, I need to use the restroom” – STUNNER. When your mom comes in asking if anyone wants limonada. STUN…wait, NO. Don’t give your a’ma a stunner. That’s rude. Your mom does a lot. Say, “please and thank you…” then give everyone else a STUNNER and drink your limonada as if it tastes like victory. 

SAGITTARIUS

Sagittarius, you’re known for taking the road less traveled. When most go for a hard scoop slam, not you Sagittarius. Not you. You do Strowman’s Running Powerslam. Because a body slam is such a “from point A to point B” type of move. But you like to lift your opponents onto your shoulder like they’re a wholesale-sized bag of dog food and you run Sagittarius. You run from point A, to B, to C, to D, and you slam your friend’s character in the game somewhere around point Y, or Z. And when your friend says, “I’m tired of losing…can we order a pizza?” You say to them, “No. I take the road less traveled. I want Peruvian food. And I’d also like to travel away from not playing. We shall continue to play, and I shall continue to destroy you. I take the road less traveled.”  

CAPRICORN

Capricorn. You don’t mess around. Neither does Asuka’s Asuka Lock, which totally makes sense as your WWE finishing move. Others may see you as serious and traditional, but when you’ve got that Asuka Lock on them all they’re gonna see is that they’re about to lose the match, because you’ve got a grip on them that’s tighter than your abuelo’s abnormally strong handshake. Why do all abuelos have that grip, though? My hand hurts just thinking about it…And just like your abuelo makes you panic everytime he holds out his hand to saludar, so will your enemies when you play as Asuka.  

AQUARIUS

Aquarius, you’re a little bit of a peacock, and that’s meant in a good way. Your finishing move is Rey Mysterio’s 619. And it makes sense. You have panache. You’ve got style. You’ve got dance moves that make your mom wanna tell you, “deberías ir a la iglesia más seguido (you should go to church more often).” The 619 is a special move. It’s got style. It’s got excitement. And it’s got you swinging two boots like a roundhouse kick at your opponent’s face. Listen to the stars, Aquarius…the stars want you to kick your opponent in the face.    

PISCES

Pisces, you are artistic. You’re a dreamer. You go with the flow. So when you flatten your opponents like handmade tortillas, you bet your mother’s enchiladas you’re using Alexa Bliss’s Twisted Bliss. Not only is this finisher a true work of art, but when your amiga sees you soaring off the top turnbuckle in the game, she’ll suddenly get the urge to apologize for all the wrong she’s ever done to you: like when she said your brother reminds her of that sexy reggaeton artist. Because as soon as that Twisted Bliss connects and her character in the game is totally norteada, her only hope of survival is that you have mercy on her. But WWE 2K Battlegrounds isn’t about mercy. If she wanted mercy, she should’ve played dominoes with her mom.

WWE 2K Battlegrounds is out NOW! Whatever your zodiac sign, this game is loaded with finishers from tons of WWE Superstars that totally align with your cosmic energy. So get ready to spend hours of fun drop kicking your friends in the back of the head, crashing your brother through a table, and giving your cousins spears, rock bottoms, and glam slams – because this game takes wrestling to new heights with over-the-top action you won’t get anywhere else. 

As promised, here’s the WWE 2K Battlegrounds trailer!

*Please don’t try these moves at home. No. Not even with a helmet.* 

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2020 Has Been A Mess: Here Are The Best Rituals And Limpias According To Your Sign

Culture

2020 Has Been A Mess: Here Are The Best Rituals And Limpias According To Your Sign

Uriel Sinai / Getty Images

Let’s face it: this year has been an emotional and physical rollercoaster. It’s left so many of us completely dazed and confused and wondering what our future could look like.

Now, more than ever, we need to create a space for personal reflection and get in touch with our powerful inner witch. Plus, spending time, energy, and intention on your goals through ritual work adds a little bit of an extra sparkle to them that may just inspire you to follow through.

Each culture has their own traditions to celebrate the start of the new year and growing up Latinx, we know that there’s nothing quite like a spiritual cleanse or ‘Limpia’ for those who want to revive their energy after being exposed to negative energy. So keep reading to find limpias and rituals curated for each Zodiac sign.

Aries

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The first sign of the zodiac is competitive, courageous, with a ‘winner’ mindset. As a fire sign, Aries can be very emotionally charged —and as 2020 continues to throw some curve balls, we need a ritual with an opposing element like water, to help balance and flush out those high temps.

Here’s a simple ritual:

Fill a glass with purified water and find a place of solitude with no distractions (cell phone off).

Create an intention of what you learned in 2019 that you want to continue growing and learning in 2020.

Visualize that intention being poured into the glass of water. Visualize the element of water cleansing and purifying the negative thoughts.

After taking a moment of gratitude to connect and visualize your intention, release the intention back into the earth by pouring the water on the ground.

Taurus

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Taurus are some of the most loyal elements of the zodiac. They are reliable, consistent and calm. You’ve probably had a less tumultuous year than most – either financially or work-wise. But keep those good, prosperous vibes going with this simple limpia:

Recite a personal prayer to connect you with your source (the higher power you believe most in)

Open windows or doors so that dense energies can flow out.

Light a dried lavender flower bundle like you would palo santo or sage and move the extinguished bundle around your space to cleanse away the negative energetic residue of 2020.

Gemini

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Geminis are full of curiosity, and inquisitive knowledge. But it‘s this mindfulness and curiosity what causes that tendency towards indecision. Being indecisive probably led you down some interesting lessons this past year.

Recite a personal prayer to connect you with your source (the higher power you believe most in)

Open windows or doors so that dense energies can flow out.

In a fire-proof bowl or cauldron, light a piece of charcoal like you would sage or palo santo. Place fennel seeds on the smoking charcoal and pour a small amount of cedar oil on the fennel to increase the burn.

Fan the smoke around you and your space to cleanse away the negative energetic residue of 2020.

Close the ritual with a prayer of affirmation and love.

Cancer

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With the moon as your ruling planet, you are one of the most intuitive signs. You are loved for being attentive and nurturing and this can be draining your energy. Self-care should be an important topic for you going at all times but especially now thanks to everything going on in our world. Here’s a ritual for a spiritual baño to help you cleanse from negative vibes and ease into more chill ones.

Run warm water and fill tub to your liking.

Add sea salt and chamomile allowing the properties to expel in the water.

Place healong crystals of your choosing around the tub, or inside if they don’t have a negative reaction to water.

Light some candles to help you relax, and soak in the warm bath.

Visualize the chamomile and salts working their magic, releasing dense energy from your aura.

Enjoy for as long as you need and close with a prayer of gratitude.

Leo

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You shine bright like the sun. Leo is one of the most charismatic signs of the Zodiac. You live passionately and are usually center stage or the life of the party. For so many, especially Leos, 2020 has been a powerful check against ego and self-identity. A year full of highs and lows helped both make you humble and proud of who you are. Here’s a spiritual bath to help soothe your inner fire.

Run warm water and fill tub to your liking.

Add a handful of dried lavender allowing the properties to expand in the water.

Add a tablespoon of Florida water to the bath —or as much as you feel guided to pour.

Soak in the warm water and envision yourself connecting with the lavender to help you soothe and cool down the overuse of fire within you. Ask for guidance toward a more balanced temperament.

Enjoy for as long as you need and close with a prayer of gratitude.

Virgo

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This sign is known for it’s meticulous attention to detail and impeccable work. Your grounded nature allows you to be practical and get things done —which is something many other signs lack. 2020 is likely throwing you off of your stable nature which has left you feeling frazzled at times. Enjoy the following cleanse to assist you in cleaning yourself of dense negative energy and freeing new space to allow new opportunities into your life.

Make bundles of fresh rosemary (one for each room with a bed and another for a small altar)

Spray or sprinkle Florida water onto bundles.

Pray over the rosemary bundles and connect with the higher power you believe in, and ask for assistance in welcoming in fresh energy before the year ends.

Place a bundle under every bed in your place and another in an altar.

Keep the bundles in place until they’ve dried out completely.

Once they’ve dried out (2 weeks approximately) throw them away in a dumpster at least 2 miles away from your home.

The rosemary will clear out dense energy and will allow a clear mind for your analytical brain.

Libra

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Balance is your safe haven. Structure and diplomacy are ideal for a Libra to thrive. Spending so much time with your head in the clouds requires some time for you to feel more grounded —and that’s exactly what this limpia will help you do.

Set a bowl full of water and salt in the middle of the room you wish to cleanse.

Light an ethically sourced bundle of sage and state a protection intention

Work the smoke from your sage, from the North corner of the room, to the east, south and western corners.

Direct the energy you’re clearing, into the bowl with salt. The saltwater will soak up all the energy you need to release –from anger, to confusion.

Once done with the sage, place it safely somewhere it can extinguish itself until the smoke goes out.

Center yourself in the middle of the room with a black crystal or tourmaline (make sure you sage the tourmaline too), and ask Mother Earth in gratitude, to help you feel more grounded as an air sign.

Scorpio

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This year you were focused and you dedicated a lot of time to areas where you feel that you are in a position of power: work, relationships, etc. If you worked hard, you experience positive karma paying you back in return. You might have had some harsh realizations that triggered you emotionally though. So cut yourself some slack with this limpia to help you revive the energy of your space.

Place purified water in a pot to boil

Once boiling, add fresh basil.

Squeeze 2 fresh lemons into the boiling water.

Allow the water to cool down and place it in a spray bottle. This will be your purification water.

Spray it in rooms, use it to clean desks or mop your floors.

You can use it all year round.

Sagittarius

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2020 has tested your ways of communication. The latest mercury retrograde might have affected some of your friendships or relationships. You learned how to express yourself but also how to not lash out. Here’s a fire limpia to help release any personal, professional or romantic blockages that have been created in 2020.

Pray over fennel seeds to seek for the release from any blockages created in the year.

Light a charcoal block until it sparks and place inside a cauldron or fire-proof pot.

Place copal carefully onto the charcoal and the fennel seeds on top while the charcoal is lit and heated. Pour some ‘road opener’ oil (find it at your local botanica or or spiritual shop) on it and let it smoke.

Perform a self limpia —use the smoke to wash over your head.

Scoop the smoke over your head and down every chakra point up to the soles of your feet.

Work the cauldron in circles over your arms and legs until the smoke goes out.

Remaining smoke can be used to cleanse your room.

Capricorn

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You’re naturally driven and ambitious, but this year’s unprecedented drama and some recent retrogrades might have felt like you were being pulled backward which made you feel anxious. This ritual will help get rid of that left-over anxiety and return you to your usual tenacious self.

Connect with your higher power of love and protection.

Cleanse a smokey quartz stone

Meditate your intention over a dark brown candle. Cut the wick before lighting and pour patchouli oil over the candle for added protection and spiritual grounding.

Write your intention and goals for the rest of the year and propose them to planet Saturn for added discipline and assistance.

Light the candle and place the crystal on top of your paper of intention. Connect and meditate with the crystal for 5 minutes.

Keep the candle lit for the next 8 days or as long as it burns.

Aquarius

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The innovative ones. Working through and shattering old patterns was a big behavior for Aquarius in 2019 – but then came 2020. Leave all the clutter of the mind and our world behind and make way for the greatness to come. This simple spiritual bath will help you come back to center and focus your mind.

Light a white candle

Pray over a bundle of eucalyptus and the candle, stating your purpose for the new year.

Place the white candle in the bathroom with you.

Run a warm bath with epsom salt (2 tb spoons) and place the eucalyptus around the showerhead so that the stream of wafter runs through the properties of the plant.

Drop some essential oil into the bath and soak for as long as you need. Pour the bath water over your head (chakra) and let it touch every part of your body.

Keep the bundle on your shower head until you no longer feel the properties of the plant in the water, then dispose of it 2 miles away from your home.

Pisces

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The most emotional and sensitive sign of the Zodiac. You spend a lot of time dealing between what is real and what isn’t —with your innate ability to tap into other realms. Here’s a simple water cleanse —your natural habitat!— to help connect you with your intention and wishes for the new year.

Fill a glass with purified water and find a place of solitude with no distractions (cell phone off).

Create an intention of what this year has taught you – about who you are, what you value, what you yearn for – for the rest of 2020 and beyond.

Visualize that intention being poured into the glass of water. Visualize the element of water cleansing and purifying the negative thoughts.

After taking a moment of gratitude to connect and visualize your intention, release the intention back into the earth by pouring the water on the ground.

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