Quinceañera, miniteca o reunión familiar, Elvis Crespo has won his spot as the king of merengue at almost any family party. Latinos def know his song “Suavemente,” but watching the 1998 video will make you question so much…

Is he possessed?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Vampire outfit? Check. Multicolor spirits coming out of his body? Check.

Also, the song and video open with “Suavemente, bésame que quiero sentir tus labios…” but does he really think he’s going to get someone to kiss him like this?

How was he not dubbed fashion icon of the decade?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Synthetic leather pants, shiny silk shirt and indoor lentes de mosca – in white. No one could top that 90’s look… except for maybe Missy Misdemeanor Elliott.

Who said it’d be cool to have two Oompa Loompa versions of yourself as backup dancers?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Self-centered much?

He really can’t dance…

CREDIT: MAKEAGIFT/SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

My 1-year-old sobrino could teach him a move or two.

…But he can fly.

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

?He believes he can flyyyy?. Oh wait, that’s a different song.

Ways this star is just like us: He likes all-inclusive vacations.

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Playa, giant singers and of course, tiny women.

Was he inspired by “The Brady Bunch” intro?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

With the choice of these four options, which is your favorite Elvis?

Feeling tense?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Let Elvis Crespo’s spa take care of you with his 2-for-1 special.

Will dancing by himself ever land him a kiss?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

For a song that’s all about a guy asking a girl to kiss him, the results are pretty depressing.

Again, who told them these were good moves?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

And we can’t help but laugh.

Amazonias are real.

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

Now, close your eyes and picture her using the boats as water skis.

Who needs acid, really?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

When Elvis got you trippin’.

Whatever happened to Elvis Crespo?

CREDIT: SUAVEMENTE/ VEVO/ELVISCRESPO/YOUTUBE

He launched his own aerobic DVD series.

Relive your family party / childhood memories by watching below:

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