Culture

An Open Letter To Latinos Who Can’t Dance: You’re Not Alone, Man

NBC

Dear Fellow Awkward Latino,

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Credit: NBC / Tumblr / Latinas In Prime Time

If you’ve ever felt like you’re the only one without rhythm…

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Credit: TBS / TeamCoco

…in your family

…or your neighborhood

…or on the face of the planet

…we’re here to tell you that you’re not alone.

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Credit: Giphy / Tumblr / caitlain-k-mcguire

We are many.

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We’re out here, too, leaning against walls during school dances.

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Pretending to text at parties so our tias don’t make us dance.

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Credit: Paramount Pictures / Rebloggy

Excusing ourselves to go to the bathroom during “El Baile Del Perrito.”

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And you’re not the only one who tried to skip out on a quince, knowing you couldn’t keep up with the steps.

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Credit: NBC / Giphy

We, too, have laughed at jokes about gringos not being able to dance, while praying that no one discovers our secret shame.

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Credit: MTV / Billboard.com

We know your pain. We know how many times you’ve practiced dancing, alone in your room.

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We know that you’ve “chair danced,” discreetly, at many a function.

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But when it comes to getting up and getting down,  it’s like your feet never got the memo…

…that we’re all supposed to be Rosie Perez on “Soul Train.”

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Credit: Don Cornelius Productions / Giphy

…or J.Lo. in her Fly Girl days.

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So don’t worry about the whole “all Latinos can dance” stereotype.

Just have fun.

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Credit: Columbia Pictures / Giphy

And do your thing.

WATCH: Morrissey Dancing To Shakira Is The Only Thing That Matters

Did you do the robot as you read this? You’re def not alone. Like us on Facebook for more communal awkwardness. It’ll be ok, you guys.

La Chona Dance Breaks Out During Traffic Jam Is Most Mexican Thing to Happen Ever

Entertainment

La Chona Dance Breaks Out During Traffic Jam Is Most Mexican Thing to Happen Ever

If you need a reason to hold onto hope in the world, let us take a moment to comment on the resiliency of Latinos. We will not drown in sorrow or simply accept circumstances de mierda. We clap and cheer after an airplane lands. We yell, “wepa!” when we accidentally break things. We turn negatives into positives on the daily.

These Mexicans were stuck in a traffic jam from hell and instead of letting the stress of it all slowly kill them (read: science), they found it as an opportunity to get off their nalgas and dance to La Chona. 😂

Primero, meet the audience of the epic freeway dance party.

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In classic Latino flair, they didn’t care at all who was watching them get down to this iconic song. We dance in movie theaters, with the mop, and at dinner tables. You can’t stop the 🎼music, 🎼music, 🎼music.

Theory: Latinos’ secret to immortality lies in how we cope with stress. This image is stress-inducing, no doubt about it. Wait till you see how these Mexicanos dealt with that stress.

Jessica de la Torre shared a video of how Guadalajareños dealt with said traffic.

Credit: @JessdelaTorreM / Twitter

“¡AMO MI PAÍS! Cualquier adversidad por más mínima que sea le ponemos siempre la mejor cara. (Fue en Guadalajara, durante el tráfico. ) #Mexico #MexicanParty,” she tweeted.

Translation: “I LOVE MY COUNTRY! Any adversity, however minimal, we always put on the best face. (It was in Guadalajara, during traffic.) #Mexico#MexicanParty”

It’s official: this is the most Mexican thing to ever occur in the history of history.

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Verdad. Nowhere else will you see this level of community and thirst for life in the midst of a traffic jam. It’s the most puro Mexicano cosita we’ve seen. Congratulations, Guadalajara, this is all you.

A car started blasting “La Chona,” prompting everyone to hop out of their own cars to participate in this traffic jam magic.

Credit: @JessdelaTorreM / Twitter

The man filming showed us the intense, standstill traffic that allowed for everyone to get out and party for at least these few minutes.

Of course, the Twitter thread was all things precious and pure.

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Like this Mexican dad whose heart belongs to both La Chona and to his “charming” new puppy girl. We appreciate the “Adopt, Don’t Shop,” sentiment, too, Mr. Morales.

Some folks just already knew in their bones that the video would be all about “La Chona.”

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Es obvio, no? After #LaChonaChallenge took over the Internet earlier this year, it’s become a valid expectation to watch a bunch of strangers jump out of their cars to start dancing to the classic song. Why? “Because La Chona es chida,” according to Twitter user Laura Martínez.

Is this what Mexican road rage looks like?

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Answer: Sure, let’s go with that. 😂Latino road rage looks and sounds a lot more like, “que te cagas, pinche pendejo” and other vulgarities that we grew up with. Anyone else just copies what our parents said growing up thinking this was a friendly conversation and get smacked upside the head? #powpow

“Yah well f it – might as well. Saquen la chonaaaa” is the base level attitude of everyone involved in this precious moment that actually contributed positivity to this earth. “Excelente actitud,” seguro. 

Someone else could have sworn this was the I-5 that runs through the most Chicano barrio of Los Angeles.

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“Is this interstate 5 in Los Angeles?” asks Douglas. It wouldn’t be that surprising given that Los Angeles is built by Chicanos, despite all the Hollywood notions of what Los Angeles looks like. The reality is that once you leave the beach communities, you’re basically in Guadalajara–both in terms of traffic and música.

In conclusion: Long Live Los Tucanes de Tijuana!

@primerclic / Twitter

The Mexican band has earned 12 Grammy nominations, but no wins. That’s okay because Latinos are forever awarding Los Tucanes de Tijuana as the president of all of our fun.

You can’t tear us down. You can’t terrorize us. We’re too committed to turning water into wine.

Watch the full video below!

READ: No Offense To Megan Thee Stallion But ‘La Chona’ Was The Original Hot Girl

This List Of 17 Celebrities That You Didn’t Know Were Latino Will Leave You Wondering How You Didn’t Know

Entertainment

This List Of 17 Celebrities That You Didn’t Know Were Latino Will Leave You Wondering How You Didn’t Know

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We’ve all done it. You meet someone new, take one good look at them and ask (almost rhetorically): “So, where are you from?” Often we expect faces to match exotic countries around the world, but frequently the response, complemented with a puzzled expression, is something like: “Oh, umm Michigan…”

But Latinos come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, We can be white and blonde gueros, we can be black, and every color in between. We are gay, Muslim, Asian, Jewish, Indigenous, and so much more.

Here are 32 Latino celebrities that you probably didn’t know are, in fact, Latino.

1. Nicole Richie

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You likely know Nicole Richie as Lionel Richie’s daughter and from “The Simple Life” with bestie Paris Hilton. Nicole was actually adopted by Lionel and her biological family has Mexican ancestry.

I mean people really didn’t know…

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Like it was a serious shock apparently to many across social media.

2. Aubrey Plaza

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The Parks and Recreation star is boricua pa’que lo sepas, but in several interviews, she said that people never think she’s Puerto Rican. “I’m very fair-skinned, but I feel really connected to that side of my family.”

3. Alexis Bedel

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Yep, it’s true! The actress, best known for her role as Rory Gilmore on Gilmore Girls, was born to Argentinian parents (her mom grew up in Mexico) and raised in a Spanish-speaking household. She’s told Latina that she’s often assumed to be Irish.

4. Bruno Mars

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Born Peter Hernandez to Puerto Rican and Filipino parents, Mars changed his name to avoid being stereotyped in the music industry, he told GQ.com. “People would say, ‘Your last name’s Hernandez, maybe you should do Latin music … Enrique Iglesias is so hot right now!'”

5. Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi

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Jersey Shore star Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi made a name for herself as the (very tan) of New Jersey’s Italian-Americans. But she was actually born in Chile and adopted by an Italian-American family when she was just six months old.

6. Cameron Diaz

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Cameron Diaz’s father is of Cuban descent, born and raised in Tampa, Florida’s Ybor City. The bubbly blonde actress told Vogue magazine she spent part of her summers as a child in Tampa with her over-protective grandmother, “playing cards, eating steak and rice and beans and drinking RC Cola and watching soap operas.”

7. Jessica Alba

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Actress Jessica Alba’s father is Mexican-American, and she says she takes pride in being Latina, despite rumors to the contrary.

8. Sara Paxton

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WIth roles on “Good Girls” and “Last House on the Left”, blonde-haired, blue-eyed Sara says people are often surprised to learn she’s half Mexican.

“People never believe me,”she told The Huffington Post. “I think it’s because they have this stereotype of what a Latina’s supposed to look like, and I don’t fit that typical look.”

9. Hulk Hogan

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Considered by some as the greatest professional wrestler ever, Hulk Hogan, born in Georgia. But did you know that he has Panamanian roots?

10. Kid Cudi

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Kid Cudi’s real name is Scott Ramon Seguro. His father is a proud Mexican-American.

11. Frankie Muniz

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Everyone knew of Frankie Muniz while growing up thanks to “Malcolm in the Middle” and “Agent Cody Banks.”

While Frankie is his stage name, his real name is Francisco, probably thanks to his Puerto Rican father.

12. Raquel Welch

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Raquel Welch’s apellido is Tejada. The soap opera star changed her name while trying to make it in Hollywood, but her father was born in La Paz, Bolivia.

13. Uma Thurman

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You probably know Uma Thurman from her role in “Pulp Fiction” but did you know she has Mexican roots? Her mother, a fashion model named Nena von Schlebrügge, was born in Mexico City before moving to New York to be a model.

14. Vanna White

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You know her as the legendary hostess of Wheel of Fortune, but White – whose very last name hints that she’s Caucasian— is actually part-Latina!

You see, “White” is not Vanna’s real apellido—it’s the name she took from her stepfather Herbert Stackley WhiteJr., a former real estate agent in North Myrtle Beach.  Not much is known about Vanna’s real father whose name is Miguel Angel Rosich, except that he was born in Ponce, Puerto Rico and abandoned the family when she was a child.

15. Mark Ballas

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Professional ballroom dancer Mark Ballas (Dancing With the Stars) is half-Greek, and half-Mexican. Ballas’ paternal grandmother was named Maria Luisa Marulanda Ballas — and while she is not Latina herself — Ballas’ mother, Shirley Ballas is an award-winning dancer who won the 1995 International Latin American Dance Championship, earning the nickname “The Queen of Latin.” 

16. James Roday

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The last name trips people up, James says, but the Psych star, who’s half Mexican, changed it from Rodriguez to Roday when he launched his career for two reasons: There was already another James Rodriguez registered in the Screen Actors Guild, and an agent at the network where he landed his first job worried that they would look like they were skirting around issues of diversity by casting a white Latino.

17. Fergie

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Fergie was everywhere in the early 2000s as part of the musical group The Black Eyed Peas. But, now you know that she has Mexican ancestry in her family line.

READ: We Ranked Instagram’s 17 Most Followed Latino Celebrities And Their Claims to Fame

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