An Ode To La Chancla
All praise be to la chancla. What other object transcends all Latino cultures, uniting us in fear and strength? Hint: NOTHING. Every Latino knows and has used the chancla for its intended purpose: world domination.
Let’s take a moment to give praise to the most iconic thing in Latino culture: La Chancla.
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Look at it. So beautiful and terrifying at the same time. Plus, it has sooooooo many different uses.
It is THE go-to fashion statement.
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Whether it’s for a night out with the ladies or your prima’s baptism, there is no wrong time for la chancla.
It will literally turn you into a superhero à la Thor.
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He has his magnificent hammer; we have the invincible chancla.
They are a life saver when you suddenly have to do chores for mami.
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And it doesn’t matter if they’re yours, mami’s or your 2-year-old sister’s. Any chancla will do in a pinch.
They have always been the best way to keep your ass in check.
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Doesn’t matter what sh*t you’re doing, this Latino staple will always be there to keep you out of trouble.
Out of shape? The chancla is the best motivator to work out.
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“You better run, Julio. Mami just grabbed her chancla and she. is. PISSED!”
From Mexicans to Dominicans, we all know and respect it.
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Tbh, this has happened more than once.
Like any Latino, they come in packs of more than one and are always willing to help to get the job done.
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Pero mira eso. (Note: We can make this joke. Non-Latinos better not try it.)
Like, they are so badass they have permeated ALL forms of Latino pop culture.
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There are good chanclas, and there are bad chanclas. Where do you stand?
Chancla Fact #354,630: They greatly improve your flexibility.
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Must be that bomb arch support technology.