An Ode To La Chancla
All praise be to la chancla. What other object transcends all Latino cultures, uniting us in fear and strength? Hint: NOTHING. Every Latino knows and has used the chancla for its intended purpose: world domination.
Let’s take a moment to give praise to the most iconic thing in Latino culture: La Chancla.
Look at it. So beautiful and terrifying at the same time. Plus, it has sooooooo many different uses.
It is THE go-to fashion statement.
Whether it’s for a night out with the ladies or your prima’s baptism, there is no wrong time for la chancla.
It will literally turn you into a superhero à la Thor.
He has his magnificent hammer; we have the invincible chancla.
They are a life saver when you suddenly have to do chores for mami.
And it doesn’t matter if they’re yours, mami’s or your 2-year-old sister’s. Any chancla will do in a pinch.
They have always been the best way to keep your ass in check.
Doesn’t matter what sh*t you’re doing, this Latino staple will always be there to keep you out of trouble.
Out of shape? The chancla is the best motivator to work out.
“You better run, Julio. Mami just grabbed her chancla and she. is. PISSED!”
From Mexicans to Dominicans, we all know and respect it.
Tbh, this has happened more than once.
Like any Latino, they come in packs of more than one and are always willing to help to get the job done.
Pero mira eso. (Note: We can make this joke. Non-Latinos better not try it.)
Like, they are so badass they have permeated ALL forms of Latino pop culture.
There are good chanclas, and there are bad chanclas. Where do you stand?
Chancla Fact #354,630: They greatly improve your flexibility.
Must be that bomb arch support technology.
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