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7 Reasons You Need Hot Cheetos To Live Your Best Life (And Death)

Not to be dramatic or anything, but it’s clear that Hot Cheetos are the single most important invention in the history of time. They are literally life-changing. To wit: They’re the invention of a dude named Richard Montañez, whose idea for the perfect snack helped him rise from janitor at Frito-Lay to an executive at PepsiCo. They pretty much improve everything they touch. For example…

Snacks

Credit: Instagram / @maverickbriones

Food. It’s good, right? WRONG. All food is essentially just a blank canvas for Hot Cheetos. From hot dogs to hamburgers to literal bags of cheese, here’s a complete list of ways to up your Hot Cheeto game.

Desserts

Credit: YouTube / Giving in to Cyn

You can’t just use Hot Cheetos on savory foods, you fool. Use ’em to make desserts too, like Hot Cheeto brittle, Hot Cheeto marshmallow treats, and Hot Cheeto macarons.

Drinks

Credit: YouTube / The Tipsy Bartender

The only thing better than Hot Cheetos are Hot Cheetos-and-alcohol. Maybe you’d enjoy from Flamin’ Hot Cheeto tequila shots? By “enjoy,” I mean “drink while crying.”

First Dates

Credit: Source image via Flickr Creative Commons / Roy

First dates can be really rough, not to mention awkward, stressful and often totally lacking in Hot Cheetos. That’s why it’s always best to present your date / potential future soulmate with a bouquet of Hot Cheetos. It shows you care, that you have good taste and that you also like things that taste good.

Babies

Credit: Source Image via Flickr Creative Commons / Myles Grant

Everyone is having babies. Sometimes several babies. Hundreds and thousands of babies, all over Facebook and at the table next to yours and screaming all throughout every movie at every movie theater.  The solution? Replace babies with Hot Cheetos. You’re welcome.

Awkward Family Functions

Credit: Source Image via Flickr Creative Commons / Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombastic 

There’s nothing worse than standing in front of the tia you haven’t seen in sixteen years as she asks you “¿Y tu novio/a?” and then points out that you’ve gained a lot of weight since the last time she saw you. And then there’s your creepy uncle, the cousin you had a crush on when you were younger, the cousin everyone compares you to and Abuelo, who won’t stop farting and trying to mask it by coughing. So just don’t do it. Don’t hang out with them. Replace your entire family with Hot Cheetos.

Funerals

Credit: Source Image via Flickr Creative Commons / antsnax

Death is kind of a bummer. But you what isn’t? Hot Cheetos.

See? Don’t they make everything better?

Credit: KatyPerryVEVO / ET Online

WATCH: Takis vs. Flamin’ Hot Cheetos

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Viral Video Of Overworked Texas Dominos Workers Burdened By Snow Storm Goes Viral

Things That Matter

Viral Video Of Overworked Texas Dominos Workers Burdened By Snow Storm Goes Viral

Texas’s current power crisis from a devastating storm has disrupted power generation and frozen natural gas pipelines. The is historic storm has driven electric demand higher than the state has ever seen, but it’s not just electric energy being overextended as a result. It’s physical and mental human energy as well.

Recently, an image of two exhausted Domino’s Pizza workers went viral for showing the extreme exhaustion workers are experiencing.

In a post shared to News4sanantonio.com’s Chime In page a user by the name of July DeLuna explained “This Dominos in San Antonio. Working during this crisis. They had a weekend worth of food and it was gone within 4 hours. This team helped those that needed help. These are the essential workers that need recognition. They were the only pizza place open. Every pizza place was closed but dominos stayed open to help those in need.”

Little else is known about the exhausted workers in the viral image but it did rack up over 8K comments within hours of being posted.

“Dominoes better pay them for the shifts they’ll miss while they don’t have any ingredients. With this practical free advertising it’s the least they could do. Otherwise these kind people worked themselves out of already bad hourly pay,” one user commented.

“,As someone who works in the food service industry, the thought of selling out of all product in only four hours and how much work goes in to preparing that much food is unfathomable levels of nightmare fuel,” another noted.

In another response to the image, a Reddit user wrote “I cannot express to you how upsetting it is to be the only food source open during hard times, to still be open and show up to do your job with higher than normal levels of orders, and still get yelled at by management for not having orders out within a window of time.”

Images of overworked and stressed is nothing new of course.

Fast-food workers are often burdened by their field’s daily challenges. In 2020, food industry workers are being forced to endure customer abuse at even higher rates. Last year a TikTok video of a Subway restaurant falling asleep while in the middle of making a sandwich went viral.

“This is actually really sad. I can’t imagine how underslept she is. Not to mention the wage people get paid at Subway… She deserves better,” one TikTok user by the name of Monique Emilia commented at the time. The skincare influencer Hyram also commented writing “Poor thing… Can’t imagine how underslept she is, we’re too hard on service workers.”

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CDC Warns Of Listeria Outbreak Linked To ‘Hispanic-Style’ Cheeses

Culture

CDC Warns Of Listeria Outbreak Linked To ‘Hispanic-Style’ Cheeses

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is warning everyone against “Hispanic-style” cheeses linked to a listeria outbreak. The latest food outbreak is attacking one of the most sacred things in our diets and people have a lot of opinions.

Listeria has been detected in “Hispanic-style” cheeses, according to the CDC.

According to a warning from the CDC, listeria has been detected in what they are calling “Hispanic-style” cheeses. This means that people should avoid queso fresco and queso blanco. The source of the outbreak is being tracked and there is some understanding about where the outbreak is coming from.

The CDC recommends that people avoid these cheeses right now and to make sure that the cheeses they buy are made from “pasteurized milk.” Listeria is a serious illness for the elderly, people who are immunocompromised, and pregnant people.

The CDC reports that Connecticut officials have found Listeria in some El Abuelito queso fresco. The cheese was purchased from a supermarket in the area where a patient purchased “Hispanic-style” cheese. The outbreak seems to be concentrated in the Northeastern United States and has impacted four states.

Seven people have been hospitalized because of the Listeria outbreak.

The announcement is a very personal attack for a lot of people. Queso fresco and queso blanco are very important for a lot of dishes in our cuisine and to go without, during Lent and Covid, is asking a lot of us.

People are kind of irked that the CDC didn’t use a different phrase to talk about the cheese.

We get that technically the cheese is in Spanish and that it is more commonly used in Latino food. However, the cheeses have names that can be used. Sure, there was no idea of the brand but would it really be that hard to say “queso fresco and queso blanco”?

At least it would have prevented other people from having to answer other people’s questions.

It’s called efficiency. Some news outlets were sharing images of yellow queso dip because it is also technically a “Hispanic-style” cheese but it not the cheese in question.

READ: Chuck E Cheese Is Advertising As Pasqually’s Pizza And Thank You

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