If you didn’t have a quinceañera – like me – you’re probably not too happy about it. But we are not alone and we need to know it’s going to be okay. Here are 13 thoughts shared by every Latina that wanted a quinceañera but never had one:
1. “Well, they don’t look that fun.” ?
Credit: Wizards of Waverly Place / Disney Channel
Okay, yes, this is a blatant lie but LET US HAVE THIS, PLEASE. We don’t want to think about how it was the greatest night of some young girls’ lives; we want to focus on the possibility that it was awful and someone’s tía caused a scene and fell into the cake.
2. “Quince dresses aren’t that great… Right?”
We’ve all had this thought as we eyed the birthday girl twirling and dancing and looking perfect in her puffy dress. But the truth is some of us WANT to work that giant-technicolor-merengue-realness. MORE TULLE! MORE!
3. “My vals and choreographed dance routine would’ve gone a lot better.”
Not only would we have danced for at least three more hours, but I would’ve flipped twice through the air and through a ring of fire onto a giant ice swan. So there.
4. “That entrance was weak.”
Our entrance would’ve included at least three more fog machines, a complete dance routine to Jennifer Lopez’s, “Waiting For Tonight,” and ending with a fabulous Dirty Dancing-type jump. No biggie.
5. “What hurts most of all is that I missed out a chance to eat even more cake.“
We’re talking cakes made up of fifteen layers and multiple flavors with AT LEAST three drawbridges.
6. “My quince theme would’ve been ah-mah-zing.”
Disney Princess-Virgen de Guadalupe-meets-Venetian masquerade ball. And no one else can copy.
7. “Okay, at least I didn’t have to deal with my dad changing my shoes.”
That’s the one thing from the night I can happily dance away from. Literally.
8. “….But it would’ve been cool to have that father-daughter dance.”
Stomaching the awkward shoe change would’ve been worth it for that tear-jerking father-daughter dance! Any chance to see your papi get emotional in front of familia is a good time; it’s the sweetest thing!
9. “On the plus side, I never had to deal with chambelanes who wanted to be literally anywhere else.”
Just look at all those big smiles.
10. “Good thing I avoided having to make small talk with 25 cousins I’d never see again.”
We can rest easy knowing we’ve avoided the exhausting, “Nice to see you again!” even though we’ve literally never laid eyes on them before. Whoops.
11. “And no quince means no fights over the centerpiece.”
Tía, nooo! Put that knife down!
12. “I guess not having a quince saved a dollar or two.”
13. “And, hey. Every day is a celebration anyway.”
Did you have a Quinceañera? What would you have done differently? Let us know in the comments below!