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The Factual Reason Why Latinos Just Won’t Diet

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Who wants to starve themselves in the name of vanity? For those who do, kudos. For the rest of us, you know that these excuses are anything but excuses – they’re real life facts.

Breakfast gets in the way of my diet.

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I mean, it is the most important meal of the day.

I diet on my own terms.

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Credit: Arrolladora Oficial / Facebook

Lemon, lettuce, radish and onion are all veggies.

I’m trying this new liquid diet.

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It’s basically a smoothie.

You can’t start a diet on a Friday or Monday. It’s too stressful.

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Credit: arcoirisdesangre-mcr / Tumblr

And starting a diet on a Wednesday doesn’t make sense.

I’m going to abuelita’s today. I can’t say “no” to her food.

Plus, even she’s against diets.

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You just can’t say no to her.

I’ll start after I have one of these…

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Just one and they have fewer calories than a donut?

READ: Proof that Latinos Don’t Play When It Comes to Cakes

Every time I go to mom’s, she greets me like this:

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Technically it’s mostly protein anyway.

Three words: Arroz con Leche.

Credit: @alesilvaher / Instagram

I can’t break up with my one true love.

Tamale season is coming up and I can’t offend. #latinoproblems

Abuelita: ¿Cuantos tamales quieres?

Me: Three!

Abuelita: *makes 200*

How can you diet when mami makes this?

No. You can’t, just like I can’t. #sorrynotsorry

Because “You can’t get up until you finish everything on your plate.” – Every Latino parent ever.

Mami: You aren’t going anywhere until your plate is empty.

READ: If You Can Finish a 30-Pound Burrito, This Restaurant Will Make You Part Owner

There’s a family birthday party four weekends out of the month.

All of them include taqueros.

Abuelita: Come poquito más. Ándale, solo una mordida más.

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Credit: My Own Private Idaho / New Line Cinema / cyberqueer / Tumblr

^^That’s how I look every time I have dinner at abuelita’s house.

I don’t even know how to make healthy chiles rellenos.

And, to be perfectly honest, I don’t even want to learn.

Show me a Latino who is dieting and I will show you a very sad person.

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Credit: Jane the Virgin / CW / angeloffthepage / Tumblr

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No Time to Hesitate: Brazilian Teacher Hailed a Hero after Saving 58 Students

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No Time to Hesitate: Brazilian Teacher Hailed a Hero after Saving 58 Students

Credit: REUTERS/RICARDO MORAES

Eliene Almeida didn’t think twice when her husband rushed into her classroom to tell her to run.

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Credit: Ricardo Moraes / Reuters

Almeida was teaching in her village of Bento Rodrigues, Brazil when a dam burst and created a 65-foot wall of mud, giving them only a few minutes to escape. Almeida rushed 58 students out the door to safety within three minutes, saving their lives.

“He came in shouting that we had to run,” Almeida told Reuters. “Within three minutes everyone was out.”

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Villagers had only 25 minutes to escape. The mudslide destroyed six villages, killed two and many more are still missing.

Get more details on how the mudslide started here.

Watch aerial footage of the disaster below:

Brazilian teacher saves 58 students after nearby dam burstBrazilian teacher saves 58 students after nearby dam burst

Posted by RYOT on Monday, November 9, 2015

Credit: RYOT / Facebook

READ: How 15 has Become a Symbol of Death for Women in Brazil

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