Parenting is hard work. (We don’t know, but that’s what mami says ALL the time.) However, like most things in life, it seems to run a lot smoother with a little help from Mr. Jose Cuervo and Miss Aguardiente Antioqueño. Here’s a list of things our parents are way better at once they have some liquid courage in them.
They find the confidence to belt out songs in front of an audience.
CREDIT: @uncle_no_bucks / Instagram
And this is how we learned the complete lyrics to Vicente Fernandez’s “Volver Volver” by the time we were 5.
To go along with those vocals, they discover the rhythm they were never born with.
CREDIT: @sammiee92_ / Instagram
Forget bachata and punta. All of a sudden mami’s shaking it to Pitbull and dad is leading “El Caballo Dorado.” Kill me.
The most embarrassing is watching them become affectionate with other people’s kids.
CREDIT: GHIPY.COM/ THE WONDER YEARS/ ABC
“Mijito querido, usted es lo mejor que me ha pasado en la vida” to your cousins they only see twice a year.
Giving advice becomes a thing of second nature.
“Cuando yo era joven” usually follows a hilarious true story of dad or mom doing something they will later deny ever doing.
Dealing with what normally would be the worst news ever, is a piece of cake, cake, cake.
“¡Eso no son penas, salud!”
you they know it, they’re quadrilingual.
Whether it’s English, Spanish or a completely new,
undecipherable language, dad can suddenly deliver hour-long monologues.
For once, they
whisper slur sweet nothings.
The same dad that tells you to “man up” when you sob over a broken bone, suffocates you with emotional bear hugs “mijo, estoy bien orgulloso de ti.”
They’re not drunk if they don’t take a trip down memory lane.
Were you aware your mom practiced gymnastics in high school? Neither was she. The more she drinks, the more creative she gets.
That friend you have que no le caía bien…They’re suddenly chatting it up as if they’ve been comadres for years.
Particularly about every embarrassing moment of your childhood.
You drunk text, they drunk Facebook.
CREDIT: jeunetrentenaire / Tumblr
Bebiendo con mi hija like it’s 1969!!!!
Oh and they also take a ton of selfies. DUCKFACE selfies.
CREDIT: THE TONIGHT SHOW/ NBC
Who the heck told them about Instagram?!
The night doesn’t end without them expressing their true feelings – in excessive form.
CREDIT: WIFFLEGIF.COM/ MAD MEN/ AMC
“I love you VERY much, mija, pero su abuela… I have never liked esa vieja.” (Mind you “la vieja” is probably sitting right next to you.)