In your ongoing quest to be a good kid, you’ll sometimes find yourself either giving your beloved abuelita a ride in your car, or acting as her copilot as she makes her way through these mean streets. And it pretty much never goes well:
It’s rough, but we’ve all been there. And we all have PTSD from it.
Here are some typical things every abuela says when you drive in the car with her:
1. “You’re driving too fast.”
A snail would be driving too fast for abuela’s taste.
2. “¡Ay dios mio!”
Regardless of whether you’re just sitting tight at a red light or trying to make an intense left turn on green, your abuela’s stress factor is constantly through the roof.
3. “This car is a mess, just like your room/home/desk/life.”
Since when is keeping napkins and a change of shoes in your car “a mess”? (Good thing you cleaned out the 7,082 empty water bottles you had in there before she climbed in.)
4. “Vas a ver cuando lleguemos a la casa.”
You know she isn’t joking around anymore regarding the speed limit. Yikes!
5. “What is that noise? Is it music?”
In her defense, did you really expect your abuela to appreciate the new Shawn Mendes song as much as you do?
6. “When I was your age, we walked everywhere.“
God bless your abuela and her hard work all of her life, but if you have to hear the story about how she and her brothers and sisters had to walk miles and miles to school, you just might lose it.
7. “No, we have food at home.”
This is, of course, the answer you get when you ask if you can stop and get some drive-through food real quick.
8. “You don’t need the air conditioning on. Sweating is good for you.”
Lord, give me strength.
9. “Te voy a dar un cachetazo.”
YOU’RE ALMOST HOME. JUST HANG IN THERE. YOU CAN DO IT. YOU WILL BOTH COME OUT THE OTHER SIDE AS BETTER HUMANS.
10. “Just let them over!”
Credit: Universal Pictures
You can’t sass her back because she’s your abuela and you love her, but she really doesn’t understand the idea that you can’t let everyone in front of you or else you’d get nowhere.
11. “Never again.”
Despite all of your car-related differences, at least there are two things you can agree on: Traffic sucks, and you’ll always love each other no matter what.
What are some hilarious things your abuela says? Let us know in the comments below!