11 Signs You *Are* Your Abuela
Let’s face it: Some of us were just kinda born old. And that’s fine! Because being an abuela before your hair even start graying means lots of candy and comfort. Come see what we mean:
1. You hoard everything – por si acaso!
1,627,842 napkins seem like just about enough.
2. You’re always hot…
Figuratively and literally.
3. …And always worried that everyone else is freezing.
Pónte un suéter, por el amor de Dios.
4. And you think an abanico is a fine accessory.
Because, again, you’re always too warm and won’t let ANYONE turn the goddamn A/C ON ALREADY?!
5. You have a penchant for strawberry candies.
Whatever, haters, they’re good.
6. You become increasingly superstitious.
Go to sleep with your hair wet? You might as well die.
7. You “definitely don’t” take Walter Mercado’s word as gospel.
Haha, yeah, you’re totally just going to listen to his horoscopes “as a joke.” Ha…ha.
8. You’re gonna need everyone to quiet tf down when your shows are on.
People better tend to their damn business IN SILENCE when “Pretty Little Liars” comes on.
9. Your metiche levels are through the roof.
Whaaaat, you’re just making sure everyone is OK…
10. You become more and more obsessed with cleanliness.
Well, look, wrapping the remote control in plastic makes sense because then we won’t have to clean the remote control, so when you think about it, really, you’re just avoiding cleaning, right? RIGHT?!
11. And, above all, you’re gonna be as damn comfortable as you please.
And as gorgeous as you please. Get it, young abuela.
Notice any needed corrections? Please email us at email@example.com