Culture

If You Were Born Between 1985 And 1995 This Group Was Probably Your First Crush

Stop what you’re doing! It’s time we talk about Garibaldi, why we love them, why we miss them, and why they need to make a comeback already!

Rumor has it that the late ’80s/early ’90s Mexican group is planning a reunion. In fact, Sergio Mayer, an original member of Garibaldi, is in talks with his colleagues – Patricia Manterola, Charly Lopez, Pilar Montenegro, Xavier Ortiz, Luisa Fernanda Lozano, Victor Noriega and Katia Llanos – for a potential reunion tour, according to TVyNovelas.

Here are all the reasons we need the Garibaldi reunion to happen ASAP.

Will Smith
credit: VH1 Live / Giphy

1. Oily chests. Yes, we said it.

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credit: Youtube / “Banana” music video / Garibaldi

Sergio, Charly, Xavier and Victor were our first real man crushes.

2. These moves:

garibaldi-boys-dance-banana

credit: Youtube / “Banana” music video / Garibaldi

“Everybody loves banana!”

3. These women were “it girls” before “it girls” were even a thing.

garibaldi-girls
credit: YouTube / “Que Te La Pongo / Tele5

These outfits! And you know that you would low-key imitate them with your primas.

4. Two Words: Pilar Montenegro

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credit: YouTube / “Siempre en Domingo” / Televisa

Can I please have this outfit, too?

5. They were the only reason you watched “Siempre en Domingo.”

garibaldi-sed
credit: YouTube / “Siempre en Domingo” / Televisa

And you’d watch all three hours of the show with abuelita just to catch them on TV.

6. This song was always in your head.


“Tengo el alma en pedazos, ya no aguanto esta pena. Tanto tiempo sin verte, es como una condena!”

7. They got the crowd HYPED.

garibaldi-fans
credit: YouTube / “Siempre en Domingo” / Televisa

…every damn time!

8. They seriously need to come back because we miss the glittery outfits.

garibaldi-charro
credit: YouTube / “Siempre en Domingo” / Televisa

***shimmy, shimmy, shimmy***

9. And these next-level ruffles!

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credit: YouTube / “Marta Elena” / Garibaldi

Please, come back already! Se lo suplico!

10. Because our Christmas hasn’t been the same since their “Popurri Navideño.”


This was on repeat all season long! Just kidding, it was on repeat all year long!!!

11. And because we’re not the only ones feeling this way!


Feels.


READ: You Won’t Make It Through This ’90s Latino List Without Smiling

Are you also yearning a Garibaldi comeback? If so, share this post with your friends!

A Man In Mexico Was Hospitalized After A Three-Day Erection After Taking Bull Stimulants

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A Man In Mexico Was Hospitalized After A Three-Day Erection After Taking Bull Stimulants

@peter_fleming / Unsplash

He’s a man without a name or a face but is what every tía is cackling about in Mexican cocinas across the country after news circulated that a man was hospitalized after taking sexual stimulants meant for bulls. The man was planning to have sex with a 30-year-old woman, Peruvian newspaper La Republica reports. The eager man decided to seek out something stronger than Viagra. The man eventually traveled to Veracruz, a 12-hour drive south of where he was eventually hospitalized, in order to seek out a sexual stimulant typically reserved for bulls used by the agricultural industry as inseminating machines. 

Local news outlets have not confirmed whether or not the highly-anticipated sexual encounter ever took place.

The man is currently being hospitalized at Specialist Hospital 270 in Reynosa, on the U.S.-Mexico border.

CREDIT: MAP DATA ©2020 INEGI, GOOGLE

The Mayo Clinic confirms that an erection can become a medical emergency if it has persisted for more than four hours. There are two different types of persistent erections. The more common one results from the use of erectile-enhancing drugs and can cause permanent damage to the penile muscles, causing erectile dysfunction, if not treated immediately. Essentially, the blood is not able to flow and be oxygenated, which means the surrounding tissues lose oxygen, which they need to function. Symptoms also include a “rigide penile shaft, but the tip of penis (glans) is soft” and “progressive penile pain,” according to the Mayo Clinic

This man waited three days before seeking medical attention. 

His doctors have confirmed that the substance that caused his condition is typically used to stimulate bulls for insemination.

CREDIT: @PETER_FLEMING / UNSPLASH

“He was admitted to the Specialties 270 hospital of the IMSS of this city (Reynosa), a man who would have ingested a sexual stimulant that he brought from Veracruz, used by farmers in that region, to stimulate bulls for insemination,” the man’s doctors told La República. In case you missed it, in order to have the mass production of meat and dairy that the existing human population demands, the animal agriculture industry has to get creative. It’s standard protocol to hire professional ejaculators whose sole job is to inject “viagra for bulls” into a selected bull and “collect semen.” It is a common practice in the meat and dairy industry to inseminate cows to increase the numbers in the herds.

The man told the outlet that he took the “viagra for bulls” because he was planning to have sex with a 30-year-old woman and didn’t want to underperform. Unfortunately, the very drug he sought out likely has permanently caused enough damage to his penis that he almost certainly suffers from erectile dysfunction as a consequence.

Some are choosing to make light of his condition.

CREDIT: MAP DATA ©2020 INEGI, GOOGLE

“Get well soon, @BorisJohnson,” one Twitter user joked of British Prime Minister Boris Johnson. “He should have tried the new Viagra LIGHT,” another user tweeted. Meanwhile, the unnamed man continues to recover at the Specialized Hospital 20.

The medical term for his condition is priapism and can cause permanent damage.

CREDIT: @CHARLESDELUVIO / UNSPLASH

The name itself, priapism, comes from the Greek god of fertility and lust, Priapus. Most of us are, thankfully, only familiar with priapism because of Shonda Rhimes’ “Grey’s Anatomy,” but it is considered a medical emergency if an erection lasts longer than four hours. According to Weill Cornell Medicine, even just 6-8 hours of priapism can cause irreversible damage and cause erectile dysfunction disorder, and “it has been estimated that priapism of 24 hours duration is associated with an approximately 50% incidence of permanent erectile dysfunction.”

The first step in treating priapism caused by erectile-enhancing drugs is to drain “the old stagnant blood from the penis” and inject “a vasoconstrictive medication directly into the erectile tissue of the penis,” says Weill Cornell Medicine’s Male Infertility non-profit. When caught early, it can be effectively resolved in this manner. In the case of this unnamed man, he required a surgical procedure to attempt to reverse the erection. Typically, surgeons will have to place a shunt to drain the stagnant blood in the penis somewhere else. Still, surgical outcomes predict a 25-50 percent rate of long-term erectile dysfunction.

The surgery fails to relieve symptoms 25-50 percent of the time, in which case a penile prosthesis may be surgically implanted. There have been no updates on the status of this man’s recovery or projected sex life.

READ: NARS’ Sexually Explicit Ad Has Moms Of Twitter Riled About The Old Adage ‘Sex Sells’

The President Of Mexico Has Been Trying To Sell His Presidential Jet As Part Of His Austerity Program—But No One Will Buy It

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The President Of Mexico Has Been Trying To Sell His Presidential Jet As Part Of His Austerity Program—But No One Will Buy It

Fuerza Aerea Mexicana

The president of Mexico, Andrés Manuel López Obrador, has made selling off the luxurious presidential jet a centerpiece of his austerity program, but there’s just one problem: nobody wants to buy a presidential jet —and the luxurious vessel just keeps accruing maintenance costs. 

The jet was on sale in the US for over a year —and it accrued quite the maintenance bill.

López Obrador said on Tuesday the Boeing Dreamliner will be returned to Mexico after a year on sale in the United States, where it piled up about $1.5m in maintenance costs.

Surprisingly, nobody wanted to buy the plane.

Bought by his predecessor Enrique Peña Nieto, the jet was reconfigured to carry only 80 people – albeit with a full presidential suite with a bedroom and private bath. López Obrador said potential buyers had been unable to obtain financing for the purchase.

AMLO wants to sell—or maybe even rent it out—to be able to pay it off.

Among the ideas López Obrador is now entertaining is to sell it to a consortium of companies for executive incentive programs, rent it out or barter it for needed goods, in hopes of paying off the remainder of the purchase price.

The Mexican president hoped to destine the funds from the extravagant plane, toward social programs —but the sale hasn’t been possible.

Gone are the hopes it would raise a lot of money for anti-poverty programs. Mexico is now just hoping to cut its losses on the plane, which is too expensive to reconfigure back into a commercial airliner that normally carries as many as 300 passengers.

AMLO avoids traveling abroad and only takes commercial flights.

Lopez Obrador, who has opted to fly tourist class on regular commercial flights and avoids traveling abroad, has long railed against perks provided for public servants. Whenever possible, he likes to travel by ground in an SUV, and over the weekend posted a photo of himself waiting on the side of a road while a flat tire was repaired.

According to the president, the luxurious plane has no place in a country that is struggling with such high levels of poverty.

“Luxury planes have nothing to do with the reality of poverty that exists in our country,” Lopez Obrador said at his daily news conference. “It’s an expression of two worlds: the world of the people and the world of the rulers.” “The officials felt like kings, they were like a … monarchy with lives full of luxury and privilege,” he added.

The Mexican government did receive offers.

The government said it had received two offers above value for the aircraft, which a promotional brochure dubbed the “pride of a nation” alongside photos of its marble bathroom, king-size bed and plush seats for 80 passengers.

However, Lopez Obrador said the potential buyers were unable to secure financing and the deals fell through.

“We want to resolve this already,” he said. “The longer we have this fleet, the more it costs us.” The plane’s storage and upkeep in California had cost Mexico some 30 million pesos ($1.60 million), the president said. The plane was in California to be exhibited for potential buyers and to undergo maintenance work, he said.

The president has also forbidden his cabinet from taking trips in government-owned executive jets.

And on Tuesday he also announced a series of auctions that will sell off a total of 39 government-owned helicopters and 33 executive jets and small planes. The government is offering 19 planes and nine helicopters for sale in a first round of auctions, which it hopes will raise over $1 billion. Most of the aircraft in the first lot were used by the army, navy and president’s office.

Critics wonder whether there will be enough vehicles to use for key governmental efforts.

Many of the planes to auctioned off in later rounds belonged to the Attorney General’s Office, raising the question of whether the sales could threaten key governmental tasks like law enforcement in drug detection and eradication programs. López Obrador said there would still be enough aircraft to carry out needed tasks in disasters and emergencies.

In the end, the jet might be traded for equipment needed by the government.

According to The New York Times, Lopez Obrador said there had been discussions with the United States about a possible sale via payment in exchange for X-ray machines, ambulances and other medical equipment.