How To Avoid Looking A Damn Fool In Austin

Instagram / thevibehunt

Austin is a great place to live and an amazing place to visit. Just know that, when you’re here, it’s easy to look like a total fool who does fool things, foolishly. Fortunately, we’re here to help you avoid all that.

What a fool would do: Eat at Torchy’s.

Serving up taco love. #valentinesdaybox #bemine #TorchysHQ

A photo posted by Torchy's Tacos (@torchystacos) on

Nothing says “TOURIST” like holding a map, wearing a camera around your neck, and scarfing down an overpriced Mr. Pink. Torchy’s is so safe, the President goes there when he visits Austin.

What you should do: Go to Taco-Mex.

My favorite breakfast tacos in Austin

A photo posted by NG (@nazztynate69) on

Taco-Mex doesn’t rely on gimmicks like cute taco names… Or chairs or tables or even a visible sign. You place your order through a window the size of a priest’s confessional, and you walk away with a little bit of heaven.

What a fool would do: Go to Hole in the Wall.

Hole In The Wall, located on the U.T. campus, is a great place to eavesdrop on drunk students while they talk about something they learned in class earlier that day. Nietzsche never sounded so poignant.

What you should do: Drink at La Perla.

La Perla

La Perla is where you drink when you want to hear tales about the good old days of Austin. You know, back when South Congress was a red-light district and not just an elaborate souvenir shop. So drink your Modelo, shut your mouth, and try not to get your gentrification on anything.

What a fool would do: Shop at Whole Foods.

You’ll wear out your Lululemon yoga pants wandering around this behemoth and leave with empty pockets and a single overpriced oat bar. Eat it in the parking lot, in the literal shadow of the corporate headquarters that tower over you.

What you should do: Shop at Fiesta.

10 bucks for a weeks worth of healthy lunches. #MealPrepTime

A photo posted by Ethan Sabo (@ethansabo) on

You could take your children to a museum to learn about other cultures, or you take them to a Fiesta supermarket. This place is such a melting pot, you can find ingredients from countries that no longer exist.

What a fool would do: Have an “I love you so much” graffiti photo op.

I love Austin!!!❤️ #texas #iloveyousomuchaustin

A photo posted by Isabel Vidal (@isabelitac) on

Let’s face it, you probably don’t love the person you met while double-fisting Live Oaks on the Bat Bridge. Getting a photo with them here is just asking for Instagram pictures you’re going to regret later.

What you should do: Visit any mural on East Cesar Chavez St.

If you want to impress someone, take them to experience the art and culture found on nearly every block of historic Cesar Chavez. Can you fall in love there?  Yes you can! Can you just be friends ? Yes you can! Can you drink before noon? That’s why you’re in Austin!

What a fool would do: Barton Springs Pool.

? #bartonsprings #austin #texas

A photo posted by Savannah Granier⚜ (@savannahgranier) on

Once a respite from Austin’s notoriously long, hot summers, Barton Springs Pool is now an overcrowded mess of tourists and children that empty their bladders in the shallow end.

What you should do: Hippie Hollow.

free to be ??

A photo posted by Jasmine Mei Connor (@jazzmeic) on

You won’t find lines of tourists on this secluded Lake Travis beach. You won’t even find tan lines. Hippie Hollow is for nude enthusiasts who want to get some vitamin D on their beach balls. Let it all hang out. Or don’t. No judgment here.

What a fool would do: Common Interest Karaoke.

You’ve been singing along to the radio for 30 minutes when your Lyft driver finally begs you to get out of the car. What now? You could go to The Common Interest and watch patrons sing out their sexual and professional frustrations…

What you should do: Austin Mic Exchange.

…Or go here instead. Vomit on your sweater already? Mom’s espagueti? Take those rhymes to Spider House Ballroom’s hip-hop open mic. Throwing lyrical shade at all challengers is a healthy way to lose yourself in the music. And you’ll get more than one shot. This goes down every Tuesday.

What a fool would do: Take a Segway tour of Austin.

Segway Tour! #Austin #Texas

A photo posted by 丁方亮 (@bigmikeding) on

You’re a rude dude with a bad attitude, so why not join the worst gang in the world: the Segway Tour. Put on your rented helmet and glide around town at a blistering 12.5 miles per hour with all your cronies. Try not to blink, you might miss something important, like your dignity.

What you should do: Literally anything else.

In love with my city ❤️

A photo posted by Kris (@misskrispix) on

Austin has it all: great food, great music, great entertainment, great scenery and great locals. Whatever you end up doing in Austin, you really can’t go wrong as long as you have a good time. And if you do happen to join a Segway Tour, just remember that you’re keeping Austin weird. And that’s what it’s all about.

READ: Today We Interviewed A Llama Who Travels Around The World, Because Why Not

What town should we talk about next? Mitú wants to know! Leave your message below.

This Pro-Trump Latino Is Married To An Undocumented Mexican


This Pro-Trump Latino Is Married To An Undocumented Mexican

Still think that there are no young Latinos lining up behind Donald Trump? Well, here’s a video of a Trump supporter and a Trump protester facing off outside the Colorado House of Representatives in Denver. One played the strong, silent type while the other tried to start a conversation over Trump and his policies. Here’s how it went down.

It started when a young Latino saw an older man carrying a sign that reads “Trump = Racist.”

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

The young unidentified Latino – the one wearing the “Hillary for Prison” shirt – told the older man, “Why is Trump racist, man? I am married to a Mexican who’s an illegal immigrant. We’re working on his papers, but we both agree that Trump is not a racist.” He added: “You see what’s going on in Paris, you know, with all these terrorist attacks? We can’t just let everybody in.”

But the man with his sign stayed quiet and continued to protest the GOP frontrunner.

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

When the older man wouldn’t engage, the younger dude decided to talk about what he thinks is wrong with anti-Trump voters.

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

“They always say, ‘Trump is a racist. Trump is a racist.’ But they won’t respond with the facts. That’s what always happens,” the younger man said to the camera. “These same old trendies do this and this guy’s older and he’s doing this. Usually, you expect the college kid to do this. That’s why y’all gotta spread the word. That’s why you got to let all y’all college friends know and start letting them know the facts because this, this right here, this is propaganda.”

Again, when they tried to engage with the older protester, he simply tapped his sign and continued on his way.

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

So, the younger man turned to the crowd of Trump supporters.

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

He called on them to raise their voices and start a social media campaign to get the facts out.

Watch the full video below:

Credit: The Alex Jones Channel / YouTube

READ: Los Angeles Latinos Give Trump A Piece of Their Mind

Register to vote today by downloading the Latinos Vote app for iOS and Android. Our voice matters. #WeAreAmerica

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