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Victoria Secret Model Adriana Lima Says She Lost Her Virginity When She Was In Her Late 20s, So Did These Mujeres

Often, it feels like society is pushing us to face sex and our own sexuality. Sex is in our music, on our TVs and movies and in our face more often than not. It’s true that sex sells and everyone wants to feel desirable, but that doesn’t always mean we’re looking to do the ACTUAL deed.

Contrary to what society suggests, it isn’t all that uncommon to wait to explore one’s sensual side. Whether it’s the first kiss or going all the way, people sometimes choose to hold off on these events. Obviously, there are several different reasons to want to wait and we wanted to hear all about them.

We asked readers to share their experiences with sexual late blooming and here’s what they had to say.

Sometimes, people find it hard to believe you’ve waited so long.

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“This is more personal than I like to get on social media but I waited until marriage and was a month shy of 25. I had a male cousin who flipped and could not believe I had never had sex. It actually turned into a pretty comical moment. He kept repeating over and over again in surprising disbelief, ‘Damn I have a 24 yr old cousin who is a virgin?!?!'” — @arcewb

Sometimes you’re waiting for the right person.

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“Yeah, I also waited long past by 26 yrs. It’s hard 2 believe but I wanted my first time 2 be with someone who loved me back. We did it and it was sweet. We were gonna get married. Ironically we didn’t stay together but I dont regret it.” — @libyillescas

Some focus more on the journey than the end goal of sex.

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“I’m about to turn 26 and I’m still esperando for the correct moment and correct persona. Never having had sex isn’t something to be proud of or feel shameful about. It’s just your journey and your right to choose for yourself what you want.” — @labrujaderichmond

Sometimes life just gets in the way.

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“28, still haven’t. At the beginning it was marriage, then it became just the one, then just a person it felt right with and finally just school and life and work got in the way of exploring any form of romantic relationship.” — @angiebanuelos

Sometimes our cultural values keep us from exploring sex.

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“It’s still happens, I was in my 30s. My father was a southern Baptist minister growing up. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 yrs now. Everyone should make up their own mind for when they are ready.” — @drkimby_fpvgirlfriend

Some aren’t even granted the opportunity until they gain more freedom with age.

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“I had my first ‘real’ first kiss — the one I count anyway — with a male dancer a few weeks after my first PRIDE at 21. I didn’t wait for funsies. My mother was controlling of everything and I could only catch rides to work until we moved back to Houston from the countryside but by then idk. I didn’t want to just get it over with. I wanted someone I really liked. Didn’t help I was dark skinned and plus sized back then either. For the people who were MY type, I wasn’t theirs.” — Anonymous

Ultimately, no matter when you choose to explore your sexual side, make sure it’s your decision.

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“I was 29 when I first had sex. I still remember when I was asked why I waited so long. So for those women out there who are waiting, never forget it’s your choice and don’t let anyone make you feel bad for being a virgin. Whether you wait for marriage or for the right person who makes you feel comfortable. It’s your choice and no one should judge you for it. Your body, your choice!” — @mars_bars82

Latinas Shared Their Best Bits Of Marriage Advice And The Comment Section Got REAL

Fierce

Latinas Shared Their Best Bits Of Marriage Advice And The Comment Section Got REAL

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Recently, a FIERCE reader posed a pretty poignant question on Twitter: “If you could give me advice on marriage, what would it be?”

Married folks and mujeres that were once married offered up their best bits of advice! Check them out below!

View marriage as a bonus not the piece to a missing puzzle.

My advice: don’t do it!! JUST KIDDING. my mom says, view marriage as an additional bonus to your life not as a completion . You’re an amazing complete woman on your own.” –pelucaazul

Beware the red flags.

“As someone going through a divorce: make a list of all the red flags (small and big) and play each one out and truly determine if any are problematic. The small red flags now always come back up later. Some can be worked on, some can be communicated through , but some are a sign of unsettled trauma/machismo/addictions/narcissism etc.”- _ashlyndarling

Keep up the dating game.

“Never stop dating each other!”-mariaelena34

If you’re getting advice about your life, get it from the right people.

“Its between you two!!! . Dont try to fit your relationship into stereotypical molds… what works for you may not be what other ppl say! Also, dont bad talk your boo even if you’re mad and frustrated. What you feed, grows. And always remember to flirt with your husband lik y’all still dating. And, if you turn to someone for advice, make sure they understand healthy marriages. Soooooo many ppl in the world giving advice but dont have a healthy successful marrige…. be open wi th your boo, be honest, nd hve fun! Best wishes&blessings – AH.”-autumnhype

Don’t compare yourself. It’s not a tit for tat game.

“Never compare yourself to other marriages or your parent’s marriage. Your marriage is whatever you want it to be and cultivate together, this is completely up to you and your spouse. This is the most freeing thing I have ever heard and made me appreciate my marriage more!”-cathrinemolstad

Don’t put up with behaviors or treatments within marriage that your instincts are telling you are wrong.

“Married 20 years and my best advice is to trust your instincts. In my marriage what has worked is respecting my partner and expecting that same level of respect, that reciprocity goes for kindness, compassion, patience, and forgiveness too. But, ultimately, this is big, don’t marry someone if your instincts are telling you it’s wrong, don’t put up with behaviors or treatments within marriage that your instincts are telling you are wrong, and don’t stay if those same instincts are telling you it’s wrong. You know you, what you want, need, can and can’t handle. That’s the voice to defer to – not your friends, society, or family. The union should bring you and the other person great personal growth. I realize that all sounds like a high bar and it is. People get and stay married, settling for far less than they should, because there is (or they perceive) external pressures to do so. Resist this. Marriage is not for everyone and not every partner is a commit your life partner. Finally, though, it’s 2020. Marriage isn’t irreversible. If it’s not working, that’s okay and don’t take it as a failure, but an awareness of your worth and growth.”-sheexistshere

Grow with each other.

“Grow with each other. Ive been with mine for 8 years (married 2). We started dating at 16 and 19, and man have times changed. If we didn’t make mistakes, keep each other accountable, help each other figure out what we each wanted to do, we won’t be together after all this time.” –danielaherreranyc

Communication is key

“Always communicate even if it sounds like something silly and always find time for each other no matter how busy your day can be.”-lauraelnasser

We Asked Latinas Why They Are Waiting Or Waited To Have Sex Before Marriage

Fierce

We Asked Latinas Why They Are Waiting Or Waited To Have Sex Before Marriage

Ah celibacy. Whether it’s chalked up to religious beliefs or the age-old adage of “buying the cow when you can get the milk for free” everyone has opinions about staying away from sex before marriage. Interested in what Latinas think, we posed the question of why women are actually waiting an boy did we get a whole heck of a lot answers!

Christianity

“I’m about to turn 30 years old and I’m waiting due to my Christian beliefs.” –sweetascandy1990

Taking past relationships as a lesson learned.

“My spirituality. First I would like to say that I’m not a virgin I have a child. But after splitting with her dad I realize that sex is bigger than what I thought it was. That’s why I decided to be celibate and wait until marriage.” – thebeautyplugbymaria

Growing up in a household where this is scripture.

“I want to save myself for the person I am going to marry. 🙂 I don’t want to have been with multiple people before I get married. I want the person I will spend the rest of my life with to be my first and only…. i don’t know. I think that’s just my personal preference. I have grown up in a religious household and I feel just fine without the sex in my relationship. I just think that I wouldn’t want to sleep with a guy who has already been with a bunch of other women so I wouldn’t want to do the same to the person I end up marrying. It’s just my preference. I see nothing wrong with anybody else sex life but I personally practice abstinence and am happy with my decision!”-karls104

Yearning for a special bond and weeding out the wrong guys.

“It was a religious decision at first, but once I got older it morphed into a more personal decision. I wanted that special bond with the one person I would love and who would love me for the rest of my life. I didn’t want a bunch of memories with random men who didn’t value me for anything more than my body. And I knew I wanted my life partner to also be more than sex. I want someone dependable, and someone I can laugh with first and foremost. Of course you can find that even if you aren’t celibate while dating. But I think being a “celibate dater” helps put personality as the #1 priority to focus on. When a relationship is sexual before marriage you’re focused on more than just 1) can I laugh with them forever 2) are they dependable? 3) do they cross any of my non-negotiables?”- alfonsina_mj

The holy trinity.

“Catholic guilt”- brendapa89