Fierce

DM With Caution- Our Fierce Readers Share Their Most Cringe-worthy DMs Ever

Being a femme on the internet can be a dangerous thing. Just like in real life, there’s the added peril of being sexually harassed by creeps while spending time online. Whether it’s on innocent social media sites like Instagram or dating apps like Tinder, direct messaging systems are basically an easy way for random weirdos to send us the strangest and most inappropriate messages of all. While some are downright scary at times, there are plenty of other instances when these messages are just laughable because of how ridiculous they are. 

With this in mind, we asked our FIERCE readers to share with us the wildest DMs they’ve ever received from men. While there were way more eggplant emojis than we are comfortable with, there were also a lot of really funny experiences. Still, it’s definitely enough to make us consider setting our personal accounts to private. Here are the most outrageous responses our readers shared with us.

1. The indecent proposal.

Instagram / @sudyapp

“Guy asked if my parents had any medical bills that he could pay. And if so, would I marry him after he paid all of their bills off.” ⁠— @sucha_shocker

2. What’s up with the internet and feet!?

Instagram / @berkeleymews

“‘Your feet are so sexy I wanna lick them.’ 🙃I just blocked that guy after the second message cuz he was getting out of hand or, shall I say, feet.” ⁠— @blitzramirez

3. The suspicious “text buddy.”

“Unsolicited eggplant pics aside….. weirdest was “Text me, I want to be text buddies *inserts number* it would seriously make my morning” because what grown ass man wants to be text buddies?!?” ⁠— @nikkidaarling

4. Was this supposed to a pickup line?

Instagram / @depressedteenme.me

“(I have an unusual name) he sent a flyer of a missing girl with my name – _- no context. When I asked wth, he was like ‘They found her! She is fine. How are you?’ 🙄🙄🙄🙄 — @calenkuruni

5. Jesus, take the DM.

Instagram / @iamthebrownclown

“FB message from a guy I’d met once ‘Jesus has been bringing you up during my prayer times’ BOY you supposed to be praying none of this ‘up’ business!! 🤦🤦🤦” — @rinainwonderland

6. Down, boy!

“Him: ‘Do you like dogs?’ Me: ‘Yes, I do why?’ Him: ‘If you’d like, I would let you pet me while I humped you leg…or kneel at your feet licking your toes…’ *Block* 🐶” — @synnoircouture

7. We’re calling the police!

“A guy said I could “make big money” selling him my panties. On Facebook when I was 14 😬” @macosanhr

8. Who are these men send these DMs??

“A guy commented on my IG story of me showing off new shoes: ‘Nice shoes, I’m Kevin. How much money can I pay you to let me lick raw beef off of your feet? I promise we’ll both 💦💦💦’….. Bruh….bruh! I never got block so fast in my life!” — @oneblessedcookie

9. Those sugar daddy DMs are a dime a dozen.

“I got a DM from this older gentleman from Colorado saying he’s a retired single guy in need of comfort from a beautiful woman like me and was wondering if I wanted a sugar daddy 🤷🏻‍♀️…sadly I had to refuse lol” — @yourstruly_alexisraquel

10. The J Balvin bait

Instagram / @comedicrockstar_mistadocscott

“Guy said he was J balvin’s official after party planner and asked for the best clubs in the city. I’m underage I just want to meet my mans J balvin 🥺😭😭😭😭” — @miriam.rodriguez

11. Toilet talk.

“Dude begged me to tell him if I’d pooped that day and what it looked like 🤮” — @darkmarkdesi

12. We knew this was coming.

“A picture of his pipi… Without introduction or even a heads up 😬 #thatswhyidontdate”  —@karlavallesofficial

13. His weird obsession

“Deep details about how amazing my calves were. Didn’t know if it was a compliment or plans on how to make carnitas #Carnitas #Tacos #Creepy” — @jo_trains

14. The rudest off all DMs

Instagram / @dabaysyclyfe

“Hey, can you come into work tomorrow for a few hours?” So weird and SO f***ing RUDE! ” — @maggeimendoza 

15. The one time a DM had a happy ending.

Instagram / @luvmemes_

“He thanked me for a soda I gave him. And then I married him 🤷🏻‍♀️🤪💕” — @julianna.l.n