Things That Matter

22 Themed Weddings That Will Make You Go Ay, Dios Mío

Let’s be honest, we all love a good bodorrio. We enjoy every aspect of it, from receiving the invitation to guessing what we will feast on to waiting to see who we will be sitting with. And, now that we are being brutalmente francos, let’s say it: we also love estar de criticones. Yes, even if it is our mejor amigocha or a beloved primo, we derive certain guilty pleasure in finding little kitschy details in the decoration or a tuxedo that doesn’t quite hide the groom’s panza chelera. We know that a wedding involves months of planning and most likely a lot of drama, and at the end the bride and groom, grooms or brides have the final say in how they want to celebrate and be introduced as a marriage for the first time. But let’s relax and indulge in our criticón attitude for a little while. Todo es en buena onda, we promise.

Here are some of the most out there themed weddings in the Latino world and beyond!

These Latino Fiona and Shrek who nos tienen verdes de envidia

Credit: Instagram. @bridetogo

The classic DreamWorks movie received a royal treatment by this couple. It is romantic beyond words and honestly they look so happy being themselves, just like the movie’s fairy tale couple. At the end of the day Shrek is all about love being more important than looks, and we are all for that body possitivity message.

This couple who served a cake that is truly to die for

Credit: Instagram. @GhouliaChilds

We don’t know about you, guys, but we would not dare to give this baby La Mordida!

These brides who love Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom way too much

Credit: Twitter. @lemondropwraps

Wes Anderson’s coming off age story is as cute and as hipster as it gets. It is about finding young love where you least expect it. The new wives are bien tiernas y hermosas. Felicidades. 

Juego de tronos might be over, but it inspires romance around the world

Credit: Instagram. @fincaestaladoval

The HBO hit show might be over, but the GOT obsession will continue for years and perhaps decades to come. The site where the reception was held called this event The Red Wedding… has anyone checked in on the guests?

Seriously, stop it with the Westeros obsession

Credit: Instagram. @eldelaldeeva

The expression on that abue’s face says it all. She must be thinking “What the hell is all this?”. Even so, we admire her willingness to play the part!

This bride who had a not so subtle message for her video game-addicted beau

We are guessing that the PlayStation will disappear como por arte de magia. The only buttons she has to press are hers. Que pase el desgraciado!

Hasta que la muerte los separe was never spoken more truly

We love us a Mexican themed wedding, but this Día de Muertos partaaay went a bit too far. They might have creeped out some of the guests! This couple is so cute that we might just put their photo on our own altares de muertos.

Hey honey, let’s build a Minecraft world just for the two of us

Credit: Twitter. @GGMerkuro

The computer game Minecraft is all about creating new worlds, right? So it sort of makes sense to start your life together in a Minecraft-themed party. OK, we tried to make up a reason for all this weirdness, we just hope they find time to take full advantage of their honeymoon and that they have some screen-free time.

Hey, do you think Marilyn Manson has the authority to marry us? 

Credit: Twitter. @LeaNoticias

Goth weddings son la onda, but we are sure that more than one older relative just felt like a fish out of water. We can only imagine all the primos dancing to Norwegian trash metal! Headbanging!

We would love to attend this goth wedding, though!

Credit: Twitter. @WikiEsthetics

The thing about Gothic aesthetic is they can really pay attention to detail. That lace and leather cake looks sinfully delicious. Shall we get our velvet suit ready?

Pikachu is in da house!

Credit: Twitter. @notigludigital

There are millions of fans of the Pokemon universe the world over, and in Japan you can already get a very yellow and very cute Pikachu-themed wedding. We are sure that these events are full of gyms and rare monsters for Pokemon Go! players.

Bajo el mar la vida es más sabrosa, love flourishes under the sea

Credit: Instagram. @EsMexico

OMG. This looks as extravagant as it looks sort of cool. We are sure that was one wet “you can now kiss the bride” moment.

This dude who took his NFL fandom a bit too far

Credit: Instagram. @bodasbc

The Superbowl of all weddings! To be honest, this seems to be a bit show-offy for our taste. We hope that this dude actually spends weekends with his new bride and doesn’t vegetate in front of the TV watching sweaty men tackle each other.

Life is like a board game, or so they say

Credit: Twitter. @doctordianasaur

This cake topper reveals the couple’s love for the board game The Settler of Catan. You know what they say… en la guerra y en el amor todo se vale.

Something Wicked this way comes!

Credit: Twitter. @outsmarthouston

We love the out-there attitude of these grooms. They look fantastic in their Emerald City attires and we just want to wish them a long yellow brick road to happiness.

One ring to rule them all! 

Credit: Instagram. @dulce_roseta

LOTR weddings arrived in the early 2000s to stay and they are going nowhere. Just look at this massive anillo on the pastel de bodas. My precioussssss…

These grooms who revealed Buzz and Woody  are so in love

Credit: Twitter. @_rafaelcisneros

These two handsome fellas are totally smashing as the protagonists of Toy Story. We hope their life together is as dreamy as the Pixar universe!

Is marriage the Dark Side of the Force?

Credit: Instagram. @belief_iwp

Weddings themed after La guerra de las galaxias are nothing new, but this couple decided to focus on the dark side and make their special day an homage to Lord Vader. Ay, nanita!

A lightsaber wedding lends itself to all kinds of albures

Credit: Instagram. @migrannoche

We hope that these two apply their Jedi skills to face all the challenges that married life brings. This photo shoot es un poco exagerado, but as the proverb goes, each to its own.

Who is the despicable one? Maybe these minions will tell!

Credit: Twitter. @jeremiahsalive

Seriously, is this a wedding or a kid’s birthday party? With all due respect, this is just too… much.

Harry Potter is the LOTR for the millennial generation 

Credit: Twitter. @carrieneyman

Owls, magic, rival schools… not a theme that we would think of as wedding-friendly. We know, however, that many couples have gotten together for being potterheads, so maybe this is a celebration of their wizardly love.

Please tell us those Ferrero Rocher snitches won’t fly away

Credit: Twitter. @kdenetas

Can you imagine being famished and a bit tipsy and see those chocolates just fly away… daring you to catch them? Lo peor del mundo mundial. 

Latino Weddings That Went A Little Too Far In All Of The Right Ways

Culture

Latino Weddings That Went A Little Too Far In All Of The Right Ways

mau_zolezzi / Instagram

Latino weddings are lo mejor. We all grew up on telenovelas where the bride is whisked away on a white horse, and fountains erupt behind her, only to find out that she just unwittingly married her fiance’s evil twin brother. There’s always extravagance and there’s always a moment of aghast that creates enough chisme for two more generations to come. In real life, though, we have the same high expectations for the extraordinary romance and grandiosity of gesture of a novela without any of the drama. Life goals are to forever be the chismosa and never the chisme.

These Latino weddings are hard, cold proof that novelas have always been right. You can’t have over-the-top good energies without some over-the-top malo. We’re sorry, newlyweds. You’re the chisme, this time.

This bride who wanted to walk in on an actual white horse, and then fell off that actual white horse.

Credit: Funny Pranks / YouTube

They seem majestic as heck, but we imagine riding a horse actually required the whole cabellero get up for a reason. Riding a horse in a dress sounds like a challenge. Riding a horse in your wedding dress on your wedding day sounds like a receta for disaster.

Wow, watch this flaquito lifted up his bride during the adrenal rush of their first dance!

Credit: Celu Litiko / YouTube

After three minutes of absolute perfection, including a smoke bomb going off in the middle of their chicken dance, the groom decides to go for it. He lifts his wife up and she throws her arm up in the air. The victory! The adrenaline! Wait for it, because it all wears off.

The groom staggers and falls on top of his new wife.

Credit: Celu Litiko / YouTube

We have to give him some credit though. He never let go of her. He just went down with her. That’s what marriage is all about, right?

And we all know every Latino wedding needs to stash the kids somewhere…

Credit: @mpita_g / Twitter

“Only at Mexican weddings..” tweets a guest. The banquet hall has a whole bouncy house in the banquet hall. 

I’m ready to see the professional photography of this wedding. 

We can be sure that was hands down the most fun wedding any niño or niña ever went to. 

It’s not what it seems.

Credit: CLAMALOPA20 / YouTube

Sure, it seems like this is what wedding photographers do. They don’t use their zoom. They walk backward, just a foot away from the bride and groom, and snap a bunch of flash photography in their faces. That’s not even the over-the-top part…

The photographer ends the newlyweds walk out into the world by falling into a pool of holy water.

Credit: CLAMALOPA20 / YouTube

Literally, the most romantic moment of all is ruined in a single splash. The photographer is walking backward, snapping photos, as the newlyweds start walking back down the aisle for the first time as a married couple. Then, he got his second baptism after falling into a pool of holy water. We hope they didn’t lose all their photos!

Meanwhile, this couple knows the exit is at least as important as the entrance to a wedding.

Credit: mau_zolezzi / Instagram

Nope. They will not begin their marriage with a bunch of dusty old tin cans making a bunch of noise as they drive off into the sunset. This couple just hopped on a beautiful trajinera, and just had to keep grinning until they floated out of sight and could finally relax. That’s the way to end a wedding and start a marriage, in the best way.

This bride had her groom dress up as a charro, and we’re not mad about it.

Credit: gm_photo / Instagram

Instead of preserving the same old classic tux for all of eternity in a garbage bag in the closet, that outfit will bring back unique memories. Just imagine passing that suit down to their son, who will continue a very epic tradition.

Here’s the thing. Somos Latinos. We always go a little too far. Tradition might be important to maintain our culture and family values, but we get to evolve and make our mark on that tradition. To the brides and grooms-to-be, please, go crazy with your weddings. Celebrate love, even if it means you might fall off a horse, or, worse, fall on top of your bride. It’s the thought and energy behind it all that counts. Plus, if something goes a little wrong, it’s not always bad to be the chisme. Felicidades.

READ: All Of The Timeless Wedding Hairstyles For The Perfect Fall Bride To Consider This Year

7 Reasons Why Women Never Want To Get Married As Described In Quotes

Fierce

7 Reasons Why Women Never Want To Get Married As Described In Quotes

If you’re not married or don’t have kids, don’t fret because you’re not alone. It’s no secret that millennials are opting out of the typical societal norms like the whole wife/husband and kids thing. The reasons for this cultural shift in our country has a lot to do with finances. It simply costs too much to have a wedding and to have children. People are in knee-deep with debt, and the main thing they want to do is get a job and lead some kind of fruitful life — marriage is just not conducive to all of that.

Another thing to consider is that some just don’t want to get married. They see what marriage can do to a relationship, they know what it’s like to come from a broken home, so why go through that whole charade? The problem with remaining single, especially for Latinas is because we have added pressure! It’s so hard for Latinas to stay single because they’re pressured into marriage by their families.

However, in this day-in-age, people have to face reality: marriage isn’t for everyone.

To some, marriage is just another word for prison.

Credit: Pinterest

Before marriage, a person could be described as truly free. You can come and go as you please. Travel wherever you want, leave your clothes on the floor, spend your own money on just you. After marriage, it is quite a different story. You can’t do sh*t without telling the other person. They need to know where you are 24/7. You are basically chained to that other person. What kind of life is that?

People are lying when they say they’re happy in their marriage.

Credit: Pinterest

The only reason people ask you “so, when are you going to get married?” it’s only because they want you to be in this miserable club alongside them. It’s no fun to bitch and complain to friends who are happy in their single life. They want you to be sad too.

Your family shouldn’t dictate what you do with your life.

Credit: Pinterest

Your family is at least partly to blame for the problems in your life. If they’re pressuring you to get married and to have kids just so it doesn’t reflect poorly on them, you can tell them they’re going to have to wait a very long time. Maybe forever.

Just because you marry someone, doesn’t mean a person is going to change for the better.

Credit: Pinterest

One of the worst reasons to marry someone is if you think they will magically become someone different overnight. If he/she is messy before, they will be dirty after. If he/she was a cheater before, they will cheat later. If he/she eats like crap and doesn’t exercise, they will remain slobs afterward too. Yes, people can change for the better, but people do continue to be who they are regardless if they’re married or not.

If you’re already in love with someone, why change what isn’t broken?

Credit: Pinterest

There are so many happy couples that have been together for ages and never got married. Maybe it’s just a Hollywood thing, but there has to be something to that. People who remain together, and are faithful to each other, despite having those rings or marriage license are the ones that are genuinely in love.

Do you really want to spend your entire life with this person?

Credit: Pinterest

If your partner has issues, chances are, you do too. In fact, we all have so much baggage, and we carry that into every relationship. One question to ask yourself before you get married is: can I handle this person’s baggage, and can they handle mine? Real love is loving a person and accepting their flaws.

Let’s be real about why people genuinely get married.

Credit: Pinterest

Here’s something that rarely gets said: you were born alone and you will die alone. We are not trying to be dark and gloomy about life, but people should not get married for the reason that they don’t want to be alone. People must accept who they are, where they are in their life, and work on themselves, before getting married. If you’re getting married because you don’t want to grow old alone, then get a dog, make friends, be a good person. Don’t dangle someone in just because you’re scared of being alone. That is utterly depressing.