I Accidentally Risked My Girlfriend’s Life With A Bag Of Flamin Hot Cheetos
My girlfriend ate only Hot Cheetos for an entire day. All three meals. These were the consequences. Dun dun dun!
The whole thing started with a tweet:
can i just say something controversial? hot cheetos ain't shit.
— Jimy Shah (@jimyshah) August 24, 2016
To which I replied: “How would you know, you’ve never had them.”
CREDIT: Game Of Thrones / HBO
This back and forth went on for months – her saying they’re overrated, me loving them openly – but all that changed…
One day while working from home under some tight deadlines, the only thing she could find to eat was my unopened large bag of Hot Cheetos.
CREDIT: cuntlyff / Tumblr
Yep, she went for it.
She opened the bag and tried them. From there, she ate nothing but Hot Cheetos for all three meals.
CREDIT: everybody-loves-to-eat / tumblr
Breakfast, lunch and dinner.
As you can imagine, she endured red tinged fingers that she couldn’t get clean no matter what she did.
credit: dennisgarcia/ Instagram/ Reddit/ Imgur
She wanted to give me a shoulder rub… “Um, let me think about that, baby, okay? ?”
She felt like she had BECOME a Hot Cheeto (not sure what this means, but I think Katy does).
A post shared by KATY PERRY (@katyperry) on
credit: KatyPerry/ Instagram
Is this what she meant? She became an orange doody?
She saw this in the toilet for days – she thought she was actually dying.
Her poop had turned pink. I told her to call a doctor, but she actually didn’t mind the colors.
Now she gets sick just thinking about them.
I feel the same when I think about how she didn’t leave me any.
But, she’s a trooper and is still interested in trying Flaming Hot Funions.
Who am I to stop her? I’ll just write about it again.