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Kehlani Is Pregnant And The Internet Is Singing All Of The Queer AF Bendiciones

@kehlani / Twitter
Kehlani recently announced that she is four months pregnant and glowing and we’re all sending blessings on blessings.
The singer has been through some tough times, along with a suicide attempt just a few years ago. During her recovery, she got a tattoo that says “perdida y encontrada.” Since then, she has come out as queer and pansexual, dropped an entire debut solo album, and is now gleefully about to become a mother to a little girl.
Truth: She is still dealing with ignorance around queer folks but is using the internet to clap back. Check it.

First Kehlani teased us with the obvious expected news:

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Claro que si, that her collaboration with Cardi B “Ring” went platinum. When two Afro-Latinas come together, magic happens.

Kehlani is glowing with her pregnancy.

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Kehlani delivered the news in what could have been a line in “Ring.” Was it hard for you to “keep this on the low”? I’m screaming.

On Instagram, she wrote, “this was the HARDEST to hide.”

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Caption: “if you know me, you know i’ve dreamt about motherhood since i was very young. when asked what my goals are, it’s always the idea of a big healthy happy family & whatever comes along is a plus . i am so honored to be given this gift by spirit, creator, and an amazing partner whom i trust with my body and life.”

Which led the internet to wonder, who has Kehlani been partnering up with?

“i knew sharing something so personal and precious could bring stress into my world…”

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Kehlani continued in her Instagram post, “but there isn’t a word anyone would say my way that could take away from this. dearest little girl, i am so proud to be your mommy. i am so proud to have received you. i cannot wait to meet you, i know you will be 50,000 times more special than i can even imagine at this moment. i am happy to document this journey and feel the freedom any pregnant person should. i’m looking forward to sharing my little world with you all… my partnership with my very best friend and lover, our journey of conception, my choice for a natural home birth with my AMAZING midwives at @parteramidwifery and eventually… the little pumpkin! i am now a HOME. 4 months and counting with you, angel of mine. SHE DONT WANNN HIDE NO MO 🌸🦋😍 we’re so ready for you mija!”

Now we know that she has been dying to tell us all for months.

CREDIT: @shaniatashae / Twitter

Yup. I’m not saying we should be sus of any celebrity with baby fever, but I am only my life experiences. I speak for the collective consciousness of the internet.

Twitter immediately started churning out pics of Kehlani with babies.

CREDIT: @kehlaniscookie / Twitter

She makes it look so good. The 23-year-old has climbed to artistic goals status and is ready to have all her dreams met. Que bella.

Celebrities came out in droves to support all of this.

CREDIT: @LaurenJauregui / Twitter

Queer Latina in arms, Lauren Jauregui was overflowing. Janelle Monáe, Missy Elliott, Jude and Shaun King are just a few. Oh, and all of you.

Queeros everywhere DGAF who the daddy is. We ship this.

CREDIT: @WISEONG / Twitter

I am just shocked that we don’t know who is the lucky human to be graced with Kehlani’s presence day in and day out. Te odio y te amo.

Okay, but now we know the dad is Javie Young-White.

CREDIT: @jaboukie / Twitter

The internet went ham on this. For a few months now, she’s been posting affectionate social media posts with Javie Young-White, her guitarist and brother of comedian Jaboukie Young-White.

Then, Kehlani retweeted Jaboukie’s gay uncle (i.e. guncle) tweet, confirming it all.

And somehow this confused the queer-illiterate.

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Biphobia is so last decade everyone. Just because a pansexual person is with someone of the opposite sex does not mean they are suddenly not queer. It erases an entire identity and life up until that moment. Her new baby daddy identifies as bisexual and we love that they’re able to relate to each other’s expansive sexualities and raise a child in a world so much bigger than we all grew up in.

Kehlani made the first clapback to bigots, but the LGBTQ community is coming through.

CREDIT: @5oshadesbrazy / Twitter

Have you opened your eyes lately? Celebrate love and life and do something about the rest.

For eight beautiful hours before confirming the father, we all got to dream a little that Hayley Kiyoko was the father.

CREDIT: @ghostsofvenom / Twitter | Hayley Kiyoko / YouTube

Tbh, queer hearts everywhere stopped when this theory was floated. Like, maybe she can’t be the biological father but she could still play a major role in the baby’s life.

Need we remind you of their collab on “What I Need”?

CREDIT: Hayley Kiyoko / YouTube

If you’re gay like me, you sobbed the moment these two finally came together to make out after a solid three minutes of incredible sexual tension that only queer people can give us. Or maybe being queer makes the tension more obvious and hetero tension boring?

Other baby daddy options also included Demi Lovato.

CREDIT: @aishadior7 / Twitter

We cannot forget the moment Kehlani surprised Demi Lovato on stage with a steamy kiss. Icons.

We don’t need a document to affirm Demi’s daddy status.

CREDIT: @oliwia02882087 / Twitter

She always has been and always will be. Look at that Daddy face, all serious, coño. I’m sweating.

Meet the actual father:

CREDIT: @yoncetangg / Twitter

Okayyyy, you cute, too, boo. More importantly, you are as evolved and loving as Kehlani needs and for that, we support you. But hurt our girl and we’re out for blood.

Plus, their baby is going to be beautiful.

CREDIT: @unlitblurry / Twitter

Okay, I resent when the first adjective we use to describe the value of a girl/womyn is beauty, but there is no denying that she will be B E A U T I F U L. More importantly, she will be creative, artistic, compassionate, brilliant and happy with these two for parents.

He is the only man she trusts.

CREDIT: @kehlani / Twitter

Kehlani alluded that she had a traumatic experience with a man that she isn’t ready to talk about yet, but that she is on a healing path. When she first came out, she stated on Twitter:

“I’m queer. Not bi, not straight. I’m attracted to women, men, REALLY attracted to queer men, non-binary people, intersex people, trans people. lil poly pansexual papa hello good morning. Does that answer your questions?”

They are both lil poly pansexual papas now.

We’re giggling and screaming over here.

CREDIT: @KerenBenitez2 / Twitter

Because if you know Kehlani, you know she works her culo off. Te damos nuestros bendiciones, mamita linda!!

Although I’m still confused about why Hayley Kiyoko isn’t the daddy.

CREDIT: @elianaalicea / Twitter

Why were people confused about how she could be the father? Does she not scream daddy vibes? What am I missing here. Don’t tell me.


READ: People’s Reactions On The Internet Are Proof As To Why Cardi B’s Whole Album Is The New Summer Anthem For 2018

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The Internet Has Figured Out The #DisneylandFight Story And It Is A Doozy

Things That Matter

The Internet Has Figured Out The #DisneylandFight Story And It Is A Doozy

Inman Entertainment / YouTube

In case you missed it, there was a full out, nearly five-minute brawl at Disneyland on Sunday, and it was all captured on video. In the brutal video, we mostly see a man in a red shirt throwing punches at several different women and men. The actions are hard to watch, but the startling scene has the Internet obsessed. The brawl broke out right in front of Goofy’s Playhouse in Toontown, and the original video clip now has over 3 million views. Everyone in the brawl is assumed to be part of the same family.

If you’ve seen the video, you’ve probably only had the emotional bandwidth to ask this question.

 
Credit: @boopluvv / Twitter

Someone insulted someone’s mother, another mother was thrown to the ground, and it seems like everyone is just going at each other, regardless of gender or relation. It was a sad scene to 

The narrative of the story is that they are related, hence the fact that they stayed together despite the fighting.

Credit: SJP35 Productions / YouTube

It doesn’t seem like it’s two separate families defending their own. They seem to be related to each other, which makes the fight exceptionally sad.

The Internet has provided a flow chart.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Credit: @dipbih / Twitter

None of this is confirmed by the family or authorities. We’re all in this together. From here on out, the term “we” will be used to describe the collective Internet “we.” We think White Shirt girl, Red Shirt and Black Shirt Girl are all siblings. Their mom is the Mama in the wheelchair.

White Shirt Girl dissed Red Shirt Guy’s girlfriend (Tan Shirt Girl).

Credit: SJP35 Productions / YouTube

Red Shirt Guy clearly has the biggest temper of them all, and resorted to physically attacking (what we think is) his sister. Her boyfriend (White Shirt Guy) stepped in to defend her. Then they start dancing around like they’re in a boxing ring. Black Shirt girl tries to intervene to get them to stop fighting. Then White Shirt guy just punches Tan Shirt Girl (Red Shirt’s girlfriend) straight in the nose. Now it’s really getting heated between Red Shirt Guy and White Shirt Guy.

While trying to intervene, Mama gets knocked down in the fight.

Credit: SJP35 Productions / YouTube

Now Red Shirt Guy is yelling, “I’m ready to go to jail tonight. I’m ready to go to jail.” Then Red Shirt Guy sees White Shirt Guy and starts yelling “fired on my motherf***ing b****, put your hands around my b****!” White Shirt Guy starts retreating, but Red Shirt Guy pulls White Shirt Guy’s girlfriend (also wearing a white shirt) by her hair.

Things start to calm down until Black Shirt Girl tells Red Shirt Guy that his girlfriend (Tan Shirt Girl) hit his Mama.

Credit: SJP35 Productions / YouTube

He turns to his girlfriend saying, “You hit my mama?” Tan shirt tries to explain that it was an accident (it was), but he punches her straight in the face. Then he starts violently pounding on her on the ground while a group of people tries to lift him off her. He pulls her hair along with him. Red Shirt Guy is finally restrained in a chokehold, and then the security finally shows up.

This whole time, the only Disney employee intervening is an older custodian.

Credit: @etherealtb / Twitter

Our hearts dropped for fear this older man would be violently attacked but he thankfully wasn’t. There are memes on memes of other Disney employees in costume just standing around.

Other folks are getting philosophical about the many bystanders who did nothing.

Credit: @lexiivilla / Twitter

Magic Mountain is side-eyeing this whole brawl so hard right now.

Meanwhile, Universal fans are taking the moment to show appreciation for their theme park of choice.

Credit: @ladante15 / Twitter

For all the shade amusement park goers throw at each other, we still don’t understand how this mega fight happened in Toontown.

This one media outlet’s narration has truly tickled The Internet.

Credit: @Iffy_Mae / Twitter

This reporter describes the fight with vivid detail. Rewatching the fight with narration that sounds like “but then, he slapped the daylights out of her,” is truly rewarding if you’re into that kind of thing.

The family maintains it never happened.

Credit: @j_t_starwars / Twitter

The family was all released once they all told park authorities that the fight never happened. Once the video footage came out, however, their questionable loyalty didn’t matter.  Orange County prosecutors are currently reviewing the video to determine whether criminal charges will be filed. If they decide to file felony charges, the county district attorney’s office will also assess misdemeanor counts. If they don’t find any grounds for felony charges, the Anaheim city attorney would take over to pursue misdemeanor charges.

You can watch the fight below.

READ: Trump Supporter Fights FX’s “Pose” Star Indya Moore Outside Of Her TV Studio

Mariah Carey Says That She Considers Herself ‘Kind Of A Prude’ When It Comes To The Number Of Notches On Her Bed Post

Entertainment

Mariah Carey Says That She Considers Herself ‘Kind Of A Prude’ When It Comes To The Number Of Notches On Her Bed Post

Mariah Carey’s latest interview is giving us so much good gossip that we honestly can’t contain our excitement. Carey, who loves a good magazine cover and good lighting, scored both of those as the August cover girl for Cosmopolitan magazine. The 49-year-old is perfectly done up on the cover wearing a tiara and a t-shirt with her face on it. Do you expect anything less? The shirt, by the way, is already for sale for only $25 bucks, so yeah get it.

While her cover is as flawless as you’d expect, what we’re most interested in is hearing all about her love affairs (or lack thereof).

Mariah Carey opened up about her most intimate affairs including that she’s only had five sexual partners.

Speaking with Cosmo Carey admitted that when it comes to her sexual experience, she actually hasn’t been with a lot of men. “I haven’t had that many, but there has been a variety pack,” she explained in the interview. “I’ve only been with five people in my life, so I’m kind of a prude, honestly, compared to most others in the field.”

Of course, while it may be surprising to hear the chanteuse suggest she could be a “prude,” we’re also well aware that when it comes to partner counts any goes! There isn’t a standard of how many people anyone should sleep with, regardless of age. Whether its five or five thousand, it’s not our business or place to judge.

What IS interesting however is that Carey has had some very high-profile boyfriends. So we can’t help but be curious about who exactly is on her list. Just a reminder: Eminem made a big stink out of his relationship with Carey… is he on the list?

Carey also disclosed a nightmarish marriage to music producer Tommy Mottola (who is now married to Thalia) that lasted eight years.

Carey caught the Sony Music boss’s eye when she was just a teen and had been picked up by his company after she’d put a demo tape together. Mottola, who has also worked with Celine Dion began to work with Carey and ultimately began a relationship with her beside a pretty massive age difference and her young age. Carey was just 24 years old when the two ultimately married.

“You might want to picture a child bride,” Carey told Cosmo of their relationship. “There was a conscious effort to keep me as this all-American, whatever that means, girl. It was very controlled. There was no ­freedom for me as a human being. It was almost like being a prisoner.”

According to the magazine, Mottola has said his relationship with Carey, and his treatment of her was “wrong and inappropriate.”

The couple divorced in 1998, five years after their divorce and in 2008, Carey married Nick ­Cannon with whom she had twins with and also later divorced. Carey was also recently engaged to Australian billionaire James Packer and is now reportedly dating her back up dancer Bryan Tanaka.

So, assuming Carey bedded all four men (Mottola, Cannon, Packer and Tanaka)…

Who is the fifth person she has slept with? We have an idea.

Okay, so Carey has been rumored to have dated Eric Benét and former Yankee  Derek Jeter, but she also dated Luis Miguel!! The two ended up being in a 3-year relationship with Spanish heartthrob singer Luis Miguel. The most exciting aspect of this courtship is that he didn’t speak English, and she didn’t speak Spanish. OMG! She said they could under each other on a more personal level. They did, after all, have a lot in common.

“The public and the media, whatever, will attack a relationship and make it into, you know, drive people crazy,” she said. “And it really takes someone really secure to be able to handle that kind of thing. So I’m really actually very happy in a relationship right now with someone who’s an entertainer, very big, Latin superstar. His name is Luis Miguel, and he’s great… He’s so secure with himself, with what he does, and you know even to the point where people are like, ‘Do an English album.’ He’s not doing an album in English, because he doesn’t need to. He’s not a follower. He doesn’t have to follow the trend of that right now. And he’s great because he understands this craziness of my life because he’s got the same thing. There’s very few people who you can be like, ‘OK, well, I’m about to go on stage right now and sing in front of 50,000 people, so I’ll call you back when I’m done.'”

Ugh! Why did these two have to break up?

Her interview also included a bit of shade toward other artists who sing their music but don’t necessarily write it.

“A lot of artists say they write, but they don’t really write. No offense to anybody. That’s just what I’ve seen,” she said, but who is she referring to? Well, at this point it’s probably 80 percent of the industry. That’s why Carey stands on legacy status.

Here’s what some people on social media had to say about this eye-opening interview.

Who can top Mariah as the best diva of all-time? No one.

She’s earned every ounce of respect.

Talent like hers cannot be replicated, which is why there’s no one else out there quite like her.

While she did spill some tea, she didn’t name names!

Yet, people still got mad.

About her five sexual partners…

Dang, Sara is cold! No reason to slut-shame.

We love that she’s so open, but how did this conversation come up in the interview anyway?

Her number is no one else’s business but her own.

From diva to challenge winner, she can do it all.

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