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Here’s This Week’s Horoscope On All Things Love And Work

If it isn’t obvious that Venus retrograde is doing its work, just look at the famous (or should I say infamous) couplings that didn’t last! Ahem, Ariana Grande and Pete Davison! Oh, and Chloe Bennet and *cough cough* Logan Paul. If you weren’t in a strong relationship, now’s the time they fade away like a bad YouTube video, so hold on butts until November 16th when this retrograde continues to show us what love is worth fighting for and which one isn’t making the cut. Plus, a full moon the 24th this week will bring money news for most of you. Use it wisely or save up, especially this close to the holidays.

Aries

The full moon on the 24th is going to bring you some positive money news, my lil ram, and it’s going to make your confidence boost for sure! Whether it’s a growth shared finances between you and a loved one or bettering your own monetary contribution, this week is good for building your financial confidence and allow you to work through your money dilemma. If you’ve got a big purchase you’ve been waiting on taking care of, or a goal to pay off those student loans, be wise and act now.

Taurus

Oh, Taurus. We said Venus retrograde might mean the reemergence of an old flame, but the problem is you might be in a relationship. We know you’re a loyal bull who plays for keeps, so it’s not like you’re going to leave your partner for this person. If you want it to work out, you need to give them the final say on whether or not they can be in your life. Which basically means no 🙂 The bad thing is that knowing about this past partner ain’t gonna float with your current one. We know you’re honest and loyal, but maybe this pattern from your partner has been too much on repeat from other past situations and your known patience is wearing thin. Talk it over and be the reasonable Taurean you’re known for.

Gemini

Remember that back-stabbing we talked about last week, Gemini? I know you’re still reeling over it, or at least how your love situation is putting you in a toxic and manipulative spot. It’s time to recover from that crap once and for all because it is literally making you sick. Protect your mental health this week and focus on yourself. Stay in and take the rest that you need. Maybe this even means finally meeting with a therapist. This time is all about healing yourself so you can come back stronger than ever.

Cancer

Get out of your head regarding your perfect love fantasy this week, Cancer. Your rom-com-like expectations and fluffy ideals about your picturesque your love life are actually putting yourself at a disadvantage! Lay off the dime novels or being too picky about what type of partner deserves to be with you and it’ll actually invite in a wonderful new human into your life. Sometimes it’s best to not have to worry about being proactive with dating. Trust the universe to also do its job!

Leo

It’s all about positive growth and awaiting the future, my confident Leo. Expect your professional realm to take off in a way that wonderfully benefits you and your partner. Maybe you were waiting on more savings or a better career position to come through before making future big plans together, and, fortunately, everything’s falling in order harmoniously enough to make it happen for you two. Taking things one step at a time can and will pay off very well.

Virgo

Stable Virgo, you’re exactly the type to remain unscathed during a retrograde. In fact, you experience the positives! That’s because when you remain as calm and patient as you normally are, the reflection needed during a retrograde just comes…naturally. Maybe that’s why you’re lucky enough to see the good in Venus retrograde this week when an old love reemerges, but now they’ve got their sh*t together. The feelings are mutual and you might find yourself completely ready to jump back in for good this time.

Libra

Expect the full moon to affect not necessarily just your finances, Libra, but the income of those around you that will still impact you in some form. Expect this to have a positive outcome, such as your partner receiving benefits or retirement package, or getting that approval on a home mortgage. Whatever it is, it will require some readjustments, but hopefully beneficial to you!

Scorpio

This week’s full moon on the 24th is igniting something in your love sector, my sassy lil scorpion, but since Venus is still in retrograde, we’re not sure what sort of flames will blow. Whether that’s good or bad is completely up in the air. You’re no stranger to intensity, Scorpio, so be prepared to either completely overflow with love and admiration for a certain someone or want to burn the whole damn thing to the ground and act like it never happened.

Sagittarius 

You’re at a loss when it comes to sorting out a lot in your life right, sweet Sag, and your love life will be no exception. Before you rule out any and all human beings (believe me, we know how that feels), take this week as a prime opportunity to take a break. Practice all of that self-care and more. Take a day trip. Make your bath explode with bath bombs. If you want stability in your love life, you first have to love yourself, so take the time to fall back in love with that person this week. 😉

Capricorn

Daaamn, Cap! A full moon in your romance sector this week will lead you to believe you’ve found the love of your life. Literally, we’re talking love at first sight. However, the twist is that this lunation is happening next to Uranus. Have you met this true love while currently in a relationship? And are you more than willing to leave that relationship for this mystery soulmate? This week will be a passionate yet unstable one for you to say the least. Wowee!

Aquarius

Just not finding yourself on the same page with people, Aquarius? Especially your partner? You might feel unsupported by those you love like they’re not appreciating your goals, and this makes you insecure to follow through on them. A domestic situation could arise this week, so be on the lookout for anything going wrong regarding your residence, like a plumbing or electrical issue. Whatever surprise happens, you’ll find others not handling it well. Roll with the punches and you can get through this week by staying true to yourself.

Pisces

You might find it hard to compromise with people this week, sweet Pisces. While it’s easy to clash and get into arguments, remember to recenter yourself and remember what it is you enjoy about the people you’re around. It’s typical of a Pisces to harp on the negative and feel down on oneself, but if you focus on the joys of these humans you spend your time with, you’ll find yourself much better off and able to meet in the middle.

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From No-Sleep Lifestyles To ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey,’ People Talk About The Toxic Things We Tend To Glamorize

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From No-Sleep Lifestyles To ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey,’ People Talk About The Toxic Things We Tend To Glamorize

“Being able to function with minimal levels of sleep. I know I used to do that, it feels so much better to get a full night of rest though.”- iimuffinsaur

“This is my mom. I’m a very heavy sleeper. I don’t function without at least 8 – 9 hours a night. She often makes snarky comments about how she was awake at 3:30 am and working while I slept until 5. God forbid I stay in bed until 6 on a Sunday! Then I’m no better than a bum!”- Smart-Connection6154

“When I was in middle school I had stayed up all night like with friends or something and thought the feeling the next day was pretty cool and funny. did it in high school a few times here and there especially in the summer and again I was so cool. Stayed up all night a few times throughout college, either partying, hang out with friends, or studying. I would still function the next day so obviously it was no big deal just sometimes be sleep deprived. I knew what sleep deprivation felt like, I knew what exhaustion felt like. It wasn’t that bad.

Fast forward to early 30s and I’m a new mom. On more than one occasion I can recall sitting on the bathroom floor with my knees drawn up to my chest, sobbing, I can hear my daughter crying in her crib middle of the afternoon, I can feel my organs wanting to shut down and my whole body desperately trying to turn off. Mentally I was absolutely terrified that I was never again going to get to sleep. That’s no exaggeration. I was terrified out of my mind. I really did truly believed that I was dying. It had been months of nights where I was woken up every 45 minutes, only to be up for at least an hour. I was truly considering myself lucky if I got 3 hours of very broken sleep. Even before my daughter came, the third trimester I was up four or five times a night because I have an overactive bladder that was made worse by pregnancy.

When my second came along, I would have anxiety attacks about the impending sleep deprivation that I knew was going to be coming. My kids are older now, they sleep through the night no problem, if they have to get up and go to the bathroom they go themselves and if they do wake me up it’s maybe once a month. And yet I still start to panic if I can’t fall asleep at night or if I wake up during the night and can’t go back to sleep in a timely fashion. I’m so afraid of ever experiencing that level of sleep deprivation again.

Sleep deprivation is no joke.”- girlwhoweighted

“And boasting that you work 60 hours a week and never take any holidays or sick leave.”- _harro_

“If you work super duper hard and dedicate your entire life to your career you become rich! Everybody knows that! All the rich company owners told us that’s how it’s done so it must be true. They are rich after all.”- DarthTheRaider

“My job says if u call out more than 3 times you get an occurrence (basically a mark for disciplinary action). This also applies to being late. There are also a number of ways at work to get a mark as well. 4 occurrences is a warning, 5 is written warning, and 6 is termination. Meaning if you’re just having a very bad year and need to call out more than normal, you’re out of a job. I literally come into work sick because I’m terrified I’ll have some kind of windfall and need to call out in a no choice situation.

These also affect your ability to get promoted which I am trying to do. And even then it’s no guarantee. I’ve called out once in the last 12 months because I’m trying to get a new job that I’m easily qualified for but competing against fatigue worshippers who haven’t called out in years. There were a couple of times I was literally puking in the bathroom I was so sick but didn’t want to call out or go home (going home early is an occurrence).

You may say find a new job, but there are no jobs right now that pay this well. Don’t get me wrong, the pay is great for where I live and I actually like (eh maybe more tolerate easily?) the job. It’s just their culture I can’t stand.”- MasterPip 

“I’m in academia and remember in grad school being so intimidated by postdocs who kept insisting they had so much to do they worked all weekends, couldn’t take vacations, stressed all the time, etc. And this was in Europe so not a crazy work obsession like in the USA!

Made me feel so nervous that I wasn’t cut out for it because I was only doing regular hours, and now that I’m a postdoc myself I can now say those people were just insane. Maybe if you’re in a field where you need to be in the lab for research to happen it’s different, but in mine I’d say you either have terrible working habits or say yes to a ton of stuff you shouldn’t if you’re working 60+ hours every week.”- Andromeda321

“the whole idea of being a ”hustler” and never staying off the grind is extremelly toxic. everyone keeps promoting that you should always work and be productive but that just won’t work. everyone needs a balance in their lives and putting your 95% of effort into working will just drain every bit of inspiration or fun from you.”- taeslid

“I belonged to an internet group with a member who did this ALL THE TIME. No matter the topic of discussion, from working out to watching the Oscars on TV, she would always be inform the rest of us that she had no time for such things because of her job.

She worked as a communications specialist at a small town hospital.”- haloarh

“I think the most jarring part of this paradigm is that the people humble-bragging about how hard they worked and how successful they are never take the time to address the value of:

  • simple good luck (good health, good circumstances, right place right time)
  • waiting

The message is always “look at how good I’ve got it, and all because I worked so hard [implicitly harder than you because I have this and you do not therefore you must not be doing the hard work that I do]”. Obviously there is a value to working smarter not harder and capitalising on opportunities but it overlooks the basic principle that so much must have gone right for them that is beyond their control for which they now take credit.

The waiting point is a big one for me as well. People who espouse this “hard work, constant graft” attitude fail to acknowledge that sometimes in life there is a value derived from the passage of time. Sure some people get lucky and make millions at a young age or become grotesquely famous due to some twist of public interest but for most people there is a real life value in the experience gained through living your life and just turning up. You don’t need to constantly thrash yourself into moving 100mph, you don’t need to beat yourself down for taking some time to catch your breath and actually enjoy life. Sometimes you just have to keep turning the wheel for a bit, maybe it’s a few years in a job that is really good for your career or a few years just putting money in the piggybank so you can buy your first house.

We live in a world that has commercialised success stories, the narrative that you can go from “nothing” to “something” in a relatively short time using the power of your supreme genius and superhuman work ethic is saleable, on social media (celebs on instagram), in magazines, on TV etc etc. Obviously some people do hit a booster and go very fast very quickly but for just about 99.9% of us that’s a fallacy. Sometimes all you need to do is keep working at a healthy, sustained pace and focus on enjoying your time on this planet because there are no bonus points for working yourself into a state of misery.”- aightshiplords

“Severe codependent “romance”. Twilight is a good example of an extreme case of this.

Also, manipulative, possessive, and controlling behavior in a romantic partner.”- tygs42

“Yeah, what the fuck was that “break into her room at night and watch her sleep” crap?

bUt ItS TwOo LoVE!

Bullshit! it’s stalking and it’s creepy.
Him being over a hundred years old doesn’t make it any better either.”- Ruadhan2300

“Also Fifty Shades. You don’t want a Mr Grey, Karen. Women who get a Mr Grey end up in the morgue or in the women’s refuge after fleeing for their lives.”- house_autumn

“Damaged bad boys do not take breakups very well in fiction. See: Anakin Skywalker, Edward Cullen, Christian Grey, etc.”- SamaritanPrime

“Kind of along these lines, when a guy is an asshole to everyone except his girlfriend, it doesn’t mean that she’s special to him. It means he knows how to not be an asshole just enough to convince someone that he isn’t an asshole.”- SmartAlec105

“I remember my mother trying that. It backfired spectacularly when she realized I was enjoying the peace and quiet, so she just beat the shit out of me again.”- PotentialRegister8

“Ah, that was my mom…refusing to speak to me for days sometimes and I usually didn’t know why. At the time it was so stressful and I would spend that time crying and walking on eggshells trying not to upset her further. Now I’m like, uh this was going on from the time I can remember, which was 4 years old and she was an adult…who does that?!”- ummugh

“Twilight. It’s not really a healthy relationship.”- BandicootCrustybuns

“A couple I went to school with used to proudly compare their relationship to Joker and Harley Quinn.

I blame the Suicide Squad movie. It didn’t show off the absolute tragedy of Harley’s relationship with Joker and I’d say it glamourised it more than anything.”- loneOstrich

“The book/movie that really stands out for me is the 50 Shades series. He’s only sexy/romantic because he’s rich. If he were poor and got rid of her car without asking, tossed all of her clothes, tracked her phone, covered her in bruises/hickeys because he didn’t like how she behaves… He was a total shitbag…. Yet so many women thought that their relationship was amazing.”- DelicateIslandFlower

“I was raised by a single father and started to realize that when I didn’t obey out of fear or had my own arguments and opinions he kind of respected me and listened to me more. That caused me to have a very natural behaviour around men regarding my opinions.

I state them, I disagree and I am not afraid to be unlikable because of it. In the end it’s just an opinion and healthy discussions should endure this.

Also, people tend to listen to you if you are respectful, waiting for your turn to talk and state your opinion well spoken and calm, there’s no need to get hysterical or emotional because someone else disagrees with you. I feel oftentimes this might be a problem in discussions and in order to avoid that, women (no generalisation just because the question is aimed at women) often agree because they fear personal conflict.”- tingletangletits

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Reddit Users Are Sharing Advice On How To Get Over Your Fear Of Being Hurt By A New Partner

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Reddit Users Are Sharing Advice On How To Get Over Your Fear Of Being Hurt By A New Partner

Heartache often proves to be a heck of a mountain to get over.

Isolating, physically and emotionally draining, and ultimately desperate, the feeling of having your heart split into can be a traumatizing one that can bleed into future relationships. No matter how healthy or new, the relationships we get into after heartbreaks can be difficult to navigate, and often times feel like a minefield of potential problems.

Users on Reddit know this truth and are doing their best to help us all get over our dating fears.

Check out some helpful insights below!

“By healthily distancing myself and having more to focus on in my life than a current relationship. I find that I have more trouble with these feelings when I’m lacking outside hobbies and friends. It’s easy to constantly worry about a new relationship when it’s the center of your world, and giving yourself space outside the relationship can also really help if you’re prone to being codependent on partners/spouses.”- SwirlyButterfly

“After certain number of heartbreaks, you start to realize you’ve always survived and you’ll survive if it happens again. Having a full life apart from the relationship is a big part of that.”- 1VulgarWoman

“When I started going on out the weekends with friends, it helped soooo much. I noticed when I was getting depressed I wasn’t going out at all. Giving myself the space allowed the relationship to flow perfectly.”- itristain

“By going slow. When my now fiance asked me out I was five months removed from being raped by two guys at a house party and was still really shaken up about it. I didn’t trust men, I didn’t crave sex or intimacy, I was anxious and hurt. But against my gut I agreed to go on the date and was delighted to find he was sweet and respected my wishes. After we’d been seeing each other for about three months I told him that I’d been assaulted and he was always there for emotional support. We’re getting married in August, our sex life is great and I’m infatuated with him. It just took time.”- Mineralista406

“I know that moving forward after a bad relationship I will never ignore red flags and chose partners with morals and goals similar to mine. Do not ignore red flags because you’re lonely. It’s not worth it.”- Melyjane312

“It’s hard because it took me a long time and a lot of conversations to feel secure and that i was finally with someone who wasn’t going to hurt me. And he said all of those right things with no doubts, no red flags etc. However sure enough one day- heart broken. So I don’t know how i will ever do it again.”- icecream112233

“Depends if you are with them, or want one right away.

For me, distance, u dont need someone else to be complete, put those standards high. If you want a loving gentle yet strong and dependable partner, manifest him.”- Koroklass

“I think it might be helpful to adopt a mindset where you realize people aren’t really going to change for you (unless you have a really special bond or something and you’re in a really deeply committed relationship where your partner is willing to compromise etc.) and that whatever they do is a reflection of who they are as a person and not who you are. Yeah you can communicate and if they choose to listen then great, If not well there’s almost always a choice on whether to stay or not. Sometimes it’s not that people want to hurt you it’s just that they simply don’t know better or they have some character “flaw” that speaks more about them. Or that due to timing or the nature of things it can’t work right now, or some people aren’t built for relationships, and that relationships can be vastly different with different people. No one is perfect and we can only do our best. And like what other people are saying, shift that focus onto yourself and work on being a good person living a happy and healthy life doing things that you love will help!”- imightforgetthis11

“Aww man… it took over a year. I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year and some months. I used to have bad anxiety. I never been in a healthy relationship. This feeling was sooo new to me. I felt so uneasy and still wouldn’t and couldn’t trust him. I prayed ALOT. And It was proven that I could trust him and just relax but I still couldn’t. I tried 3 therapist that didn’t help. I just wasted money. What helped me was reading books and going out with my friends. I am currently reading 4 books and reading them has helped my issues. It’s therapy for me. I read books about relationships and men and women. I learned more about myself. I got a relationship/life coach by researching the book and found that there are people who will coach you. She told me I get anxiety because I’m going against my feminine ways. I was trying to control my bf for no reason, nag him and etc. I stopped doing that and became relaxed. I focused on becoming a better person. I read books on being feminine in a relationship and I tried it. I started being more happy and just letting go. I stopped worrying and it feels great. I don’t think he will hurt me. I don’t have those thoughts anymore. I don’t think he’ll cheat either. He adores me so much and I get reminded of that every single day. I just sat back and did nothing and focused on ME. You have to fix yourself before you get into a relationship or else marriage will unravel it all and it could go bad. When I prayed I already had confirmation. I downloaded scripture apps and got more into prayer. If you’re religious then trusting God will help you trust yourself

I also learned that thinking negative has ALOT to do with it. I learned to only think positive and I’m normally happy the whole entire day. I just changed my life around. My coach also said when I change, my partner changes. He was always loving to me, but now he seems to have falling deeper.”- itristain

“Books have also been a huge help in my healing journey and figuring out how not only my partners, but I was hurting and sabotaging my relationships.”-Sea-Delay

“I am and always have been laid back, loving and trusting in my relationships. But they have always ended in the the guy treating me bad eventually (I have broken up with them pretty quick after such treatment). But now I always have a feeling they will betray me no matter how loving our relationship is, like they are always just pretending to be loving and will eventually be horrible to me and it makes me feel really sad.”- callmedeniro

“Time and taking things slowly in the beginning. Took me a while to get there but I worked through those feelings and got there eventually.”- kinkyspidersex

“My fiance came home from work and instead of helping my friend move that was standing right outside, he told me he actually didn’t love and dint want to be in this life with me anymore. So that was rough. I dont think… I have gotten over that fear? I still think about how my current, long term partner of almost 3 years might do that. And there’s not much I can do about it? It wasn’t my fault the first time, shit just happens, he might fall out of love with me this time too. I just remember those fears are mine,and not rational, and thats not fair to put on my current partner to make me feel better about.”- seeemilydostuf

“It all came down to the right man. He could have other women but he wants me. He doesn’t have to be with someone to be happy but he chooses to be with me. He never tells me something he doesn’t think is true. In light of all that I just can’t really imagine him hurting me or lying to me about how he feels… he’s just had so many opportunities to do something else and he hasn’t.”- phasestep

“Day by day, by being vulnerable with my new partner and most of the time he doesn’t let me down.”- StrongEye1738

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