Entertainment

‘Bridget Jones’s Diary’ Recast To Be The Latino Romantic Comedy We Need In Our Lives

iamcardib / Instagram / Bridget Jones's Diary / Miramax Pictures

Bridget Jones’s Diary is a beloved romantic comedy based on an even older love story: “Pride and Prejudice,” by Jane Austin. Although at the time the movie brought the century-old story into the modern age, we can’t help but wonder: what would the story look like shifted to a new location, maybe Mexico? Bridget Jones’s Diary meets Latino spunk would be the remake that 21st century deserves. Here’s our dream team for when it inevitably happens.

Cardi B as Bridget Jones

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Best selling female solo rap artist Cardi B has the spunk and humor a Latina Bridget would need. She’s funny, she’s great at speaking her mind, and we would love her witty comebacks updated to Spanglish. We all know her love affair with Offset has drawn tons of publicity and took fans in new twists and turns, so her onscreen love life could be similarly captivating. We imagine her as a creative and thoughtful writer making her way through the world hoping to find true love.

Is there anything Cardi B couldn’t do? We doubt it. She’d have her pick of suitors in real life and in our fictional world.

Rosie Perez as Bridget’s Mum

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Mrs. Jones is a vital role in the show, as any Bridget Jones fan can tell you. Rosie Perez as the Boricua mother to our Cardi B’s Bridget Jones is our top pick. The hardworking, long-suffering Mrs. Jones passes on an important message to Bridget: don’t live your life for someone else. Perez would be just the voice we need to deliver such a performance.

Oscar Isaac as Mark Darcy

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Bachelor No. 1: Oscar Isaac! The “Star Wars” star would be killer as Mr. Darcy, the slightly snooty childhood friend of Bridget. He’s handsome and he knows it and is therefore very discerning. Will he follow his heart and follow our Cardi B leading lady? Or will his career as a lawyer and divorcee lead him astray, further into loneliness? And what exactly lead to the breakdown of his last marriage? The answer may lie with his competitor for Bridget’s heart, Daniel Cleaver.

Diego Luna as Daniel Cleaver

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Eligible Bachelor No. 2: Diego Luna! This fellow “Star Wars” hottie would be all the rage as the next man after Bridget’s affections, Daniel Cleaver, who happens to be Bridget’s boss. Messy, we know! Bridget is head over heels with her dutiful employer, which is totally believable when you consider he’ll be played by Isaac. But the studly Mr. Cleaver has a lady-problem: there’s just too many of them. He’s not exclusive with Bridget, and he only dates her occasionally. He may have another few skeletons in his closet and seems to have lasting beef with Marc Darcy. This mystery could lead to some serious conflict!

George Lopez as Bridget’s Dad

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George Lopez would be a hilarious father to Cardi B’s Bridget Jones, Colin. Mr. Jones has a lot on his plate: does his wife still love him? Will his daughter marry someone he likes? Is there still time for a nap? These and other questions will have to be part of Lopez’s starring role in our recast.

Felise Garcia as Una Alconbury

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Bridget’s mother’s best friend and Mark’s aunt Una Alconbury plays an important comedic role in the movie, so it’s vital we have someone who can keep the timing. We pick Felise Garcia, of “Where Is Your Mind,” as an important supporting role.

Danny Trejo as Uncle Geoffrey

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Uncle Geoffrey? More like Tío Geoffrey now! Danny Trejo pretty much looks like everyone’s cholo tío so we insist he plays the role of the weird uncle in Bridget Jones. His raspy voice and comedic timing make him essential to such a role.

Christina Aguilera as Perpetua

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You have to admit, no one loves taking up space in Latino communities more than white Latinos. Christina in all her diva-worthy antics would make a pretty funny Perpetua, Bridget’s annoying coworker. She can even have a vibrato solo if she promises to keep quiet afterward.

Amara La Negra as Sharon a.k.a. Shazzer

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Who better to play Bridget’s ride-or-die than Amara La Negra? She keeps it real and ensures that Bridget knows how to take care of herself. Cardi and Amara together as besties even for a fictional two-hours? We want! Apparently, Shazzer’s character was modeled after one of the author’s best friends, so she’s one of the most charming and personal additions to the cast.

Wilson Cruz as Tom

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Gay and proud actor Wilson Cruz is our pick for the ever-on-point Tom, friend and confidant to Bridget. His advice is usually the best in the movie, so we need someone who similarly seems to have their stuff sorted out to play the role. Wilson Cruz is it!

Yalitza Aparicio as Jude

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Roma star Yalitza Aparicio stands on the side of Bridget in our recast, being one of her best friends. Enduring in a long but tense relationship herself, she has a lot of lived experience to offer our diary-writer throughout the course of her plot.

Jessica Alba as Natasha

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The sensible, put-together attorney who is also vying for Marc Darcy, Natasha is Bridget’s closest thing to competition. Jessica Alba’s radiant looks would definitely give the cast a run for their money, but will it be enough to snag the man? And really, is that even what she wants? She might not be the competitor you expect!

Francia Raisa as Lara

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Who’s that snogging with Daniel Cleaver in the backroom? Francia Raisa as Lara, that’s who! The Mexican/Honduran Grown-ish actress is one of many other girls Cleaver ends up having around and ultimately helps Bridget come to her own decisions later on.

Benjamin Bratt as Julien

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Who better to play the bad guy than Benjamin Bratt, the voice actor behind Coco‘s pompous Ernesto de la Cruz? Julien’s character wins over Bridget’s mother, Pamela, convincing her to temporarily leave her husband. All is not as promised, and the shopping channel presenter turns out to be more than what she bargained for.

Lorenzo Lamas as Admiral Darcy

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Mark Darcy’s father, Malcolm, was an admiral in the Royal Navy and said to have very handsome in his younger years. Lorenzo Lamas would be an excellent option then, being the perfect well-aged heartthrob crossover from the 20th century.

Cristela Alonzo as Elaine Darcy

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Comedian, actress and writer Cristela Alonzo is our pick for Mrs. Darcy, Marc’s mother. She’s an important recurring character who has a long history with the Jones family and ultimately wants the best for her son, the young and charming Marc.


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What do you think? Would you watch our all-Latino reboot of Bridget Jones’ Diary? Would you dream up someone else as the star or eligible bachelor(s)?

Here’s Why Everyone Is Talking About Hulu’s ‘Culture Shock’ A Horror Film That Highlights The Migrant Crisis

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Here’s Why Everyone Is Talking About Hulu’s ‘Culture Shock’ A Horror Film That Highlights The Migrant Crisis

In the most recent installment of Blumhouse’s “Into the Dark” Hulu TV movie anthology series, “Culture Shock”, a story about a Mexican woman who finds herself trapped in a warped American utopia after attempting to cross the border, Blumhouse explores the horrors of the migrant crisis, adding a dose of supernatural to the already chilling situation many migrants are face when striving for a better life. 

“Culture Shock” follows Marisol, played by Mexican actress Martha Higareda, a poor young pregnant woman living in Mexico who dreams of a better life for her and her unborn child.

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“Culture Shock” immediately establishes the harrowing conditions that many immigrants face in their home countries before deciding to emigrate. Indeed, one of “Culture Shock”‘s first scenes shows Marisol being raped by Oscar, a man we had previously been led to believe was her loving boyfriend. Shortly after, we also discover that Oscar stole money she had given him to secure her passage across the border to the U.S. This leaves Martha stranded and alone in her home country of Mexico, and also now carrying the child of the man who assaulted her, which adds even more urgency to her situation.

Marisol bravely decides to attempt the crossing one more time to secure a future for her and her baby, paying a “coyote” hundreds of dollars to help smuggle her into the U.S. The journey isn’t an easy one–at nearly every stop on the way to America, Marisol is strong-armed into giving every new handler additional money–money that she wasn’t told about before. If nothing, “Culture Shock” gives a realistic, if infuriating,  portrayal of all of the injustice desperate migrants are subjected to while trying to cross the border. And the danger is steeper than ever for Marisol, a single woman who is also pregnant. The threat of sexual violence on Marisol’s body is constant, and what’s more disturbing is how habituated to sexual and other forms of violence she seems to be. It’s just another subtle nod towards her complicated and traumatic history.

After being caught at the U.S. border, Marisol wakes up in a pastel-colored paradise that embodies the American dream in every aspect: the residents are beaming, the food is delicious and abundant, and the pervading sense of peace and harmony of the so-called town of “Cape Joy” easily lulls Marisol into an immediate sense of security. It’s here that the director, Latina auteur Gigi Saul Guerrero, begins to flex her artistic muscles. The cinematography is disorienting, with off-center and odd-angled close-ups, quick cutaways that mimic Marisol’s constant confusion, and a visual stark contrast between Marisol’s old, dreary life in Mexico and her new, vibrant life in Cape Joy, USA.  

But something isn’t right in Cape Joy.

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Not only does Marisol have no recent memories of what happened to her after being caught by US Border Patrol, but the fellow immigrants she crossed over with have no idea who she is. And while Marisol mysteriously gave birth to her baby while she was presumably unconscious, she’s never allowed to hold her. When Marisol expresses concern to her host mother, Betty (Barbara Crampton) about her missing old belongings, Betty tells her: “Don’t worry about what you’ve lost. Think instead of all that you’ve gained.” It’s lines like this, which are obviously meant to convey more than just the literal meaning of the words, that the movie leans hard into.

Throughout “Into the Dark”, there is an underlying current of not-so-subtle political messaging that makes it obvious that this movie isn’t your typical straight-forward horror film. It’s as much a vehicle for social commentary and critique on the migrant crisis and America’s inhumane treatment of migrants at the border as it is about delivering stomach-churning gore and jump scares. The movie, directed by,  confirms the existential fear many migrants have of looked at as sub-human when they try to cross the border. Sometimes, the social commentary comes off as a little too on-the-nose, with Big-Bads saying things such as: “Nobody gives a fuck about these people,” and “We’re not paid to give [them] the American Dream. We’re paid to keep them out of it”. 

When the mystery behind the oddness of Cape Joy is finally revealed, the element of sci-fi and horror that’s added to Marisol’s story can almost feel like a relief, purely due to its obvious fictional tropes. The more terrifying parts of the movie–the abusive boyfriends, the violent men, the human traffickers, and the Mexican cartel–are arguably more frightening than the supernatural parts.

And lest, while watching, you trick yourself into thinking the movie isn’t really a horror movie, prepare yourself for a few jarring scenes.

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The climax of the movie is an extremely gruesome and violently gory climax that establishes the anthology installment as exactly what it markets itself as: a horror movie. But as we’ve seen in headlines that flood the TV, the newspapers, and our phones, sometimes, reality can be more horrifying than fiction. 

Selena Gomez Is Fighting To Make Sure That Everyone Can Speak Openly And Honestly About Getting Help For Their Mental Health

Entertainment

Selena Gomez Is Fighting To Make Sure That Everyone Can Speak Openly And Honestly About Getting Help For Their Mental Health

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Selena Marie Gomez (born in Texas in 1992) has been in the public eye for as long as she can remember. She has been a role model for young girls as a singer and an actress and now is involved in more risqué films such as Spring Breakers, a delirious film by indie filmmaker Harmony Korine. Besides having a strong onscreen persona, Gomez has been in relationships with the likes of Justin Bieber, which of course turned the paparazzi attention and cameras to her. Suddenly, when she was barely a teenager her every move was being followed. Her life was sort of predestined to be great when she was named after the great late Selena Quintanilla. However, she has had to deal with divorce (her parents separated when she was five-years-old) and with weak health, as she was diagnosed with lupus, an auto-immune disease, which ultimately forced her to get a kidney transplant. She found strength in her mom. Gomez has said that her mother “was really strong around me. Having me at 16 had to have been a big responsibility. She gave up everything for me, had three jobs, supported me, sacrificed her life for me.” That must provide so much strength for a woman of barely 26 but who has gone through more in her lifetime than many 50-year-olds.

This must not be easy for anyone, even more so for a Latino woman. Gomez knows that she has a microphone and that she can get to other girls and women. “The older I get, the prouder I am to be a woman in the industry. When I was younger and running around all the time on tour, I don’t think I took the time to notice how being a woman in my position is really a gift. I want to make sure I utilize all that power,” the young Latina star told Into the GlossShe has used this position of privilege to raise awareness on mental health issues, including suicide prevention, both as a celebrity and as a producer. She is also a supporter of associations such as Make A Wish (which grants children diagnosed with life-threatening conditions), the Alliance for Children’s Rights and the Ryan Seacrest Foundation. 

Selena Gomez fights for friendships above anything else: girl power.

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Gomez values friendship and spreads the word. She has such loyal friends that one even donated a kidney when Gomez needed a transplant. She says: “People are put into your life for seasons, for different reasons, and to teach you lessons”: Selena, we couldn’t agree more.

She gets politically enraged when it matters.

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Gomez knows that a lot of mental health issues concerning young women are related to the policing of their sexuality and reproductive rights. She gets political when she feels the need to, particularly with issues concerning the mental health and general wellbeing of young women like herself. 

She asks her fans to be strong, but to also look for help when needed.

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Her advice: “I’ve learned there’s power deep down inside yourself, and you can find it when you don’t give up on yourself and when you ask for help.” This is so real it hurts: even someone like her, who in the eyes of her fans might seem to have it all, needs to be humble and honest in reaching out to others when the world seems bleak. There is always someone who cares if you are OK. 

She stands up for migrants.

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Gomez doesn’t get political often, but when she does she always stands up for the minority communities. She has been a vocal advocate for migrant rights and the rights of women. She even wore a 1973 necklace as one of very few Latina celebs speaking up for abortion rights.

She even takes a stand from DACA recipients and Dreamers.

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She has used her social media accounts, which have followers in the millions, to call her fans to action. She is clearly showing the world that she does care and she is paying attention. 

She delivers a message of self-acceptance, which led her to produce 13 Reasons Why.

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Gomez’s mother, Amanda, had her when she was just 16, and then raised her by herself. She was also the one that gave Gomez the book on which the Netflix show 13 Reasons Why is based. The show was controversial because it spoke about mental health issues and suicide, topics that are fundamental to discuss with young vulnerable populations but that remain a taboo. However, Gomez’s message is optimistic. She has said: “I promise you that each and every one of you is made to be who you are and that’s what’s so attractive and beautiful.” Preach! 

13 Reasons Why put mental health issues at the forefront of public media debate.

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“I get it all day, every day, that I’m not sexy enough, or I’m not cool enough, or if I did this I would be accepted… I promise you that each and every one of you is made to be who you are and that’s what’s so attractive and beautiful. Please don’t forget that, even when it gets hard,” she said in an interview for the Huffington PostAnd this is exactly the message that she conveys in her project. Taking on Jay Asher’s literary world, she and the series creative team were able to show mental health and suicide from all possible angles. 

She takes fame with a grain of salt.

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She has been famous for a big portion of her life, but she knows that todo es pasajero, and that at the end who you are does not depend merely on adulation: “You are not defined by an Instagram photo, by a ‘Like,’ by a comment. That does not define you.”

Body positivity is her mantra.

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“I feel very empowered and confident and comfortable with where I am. And I think it took me a long time to get there because, you know, the past year was so interesting because I’ve never been body-shamed before… I did gain weight, but I don’t care,” she said at On Air with Ryan SeacrestThis is a great, positive message for someone who is followed by millions of young women throughout the world, particularly in a day and age when standards of beauty are twisted and self-love is hard to achieve. 

She is an active advocate of girl power.

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Perhaps following the example of her mother, who basically raised her alone while holding down as many jobs as necessary to make ends meet, Gomez says: “I don’t want to become little or hurt or a victim. I want to be strong for girls…I just want them to know that there is an option of standing up for yourself.” Additionally, she was named a United Nations Ambassador in 2009, and in this role, she has worked particularly in empowering vulnerable children by helping provide clean water, education, and medical services. 

You learn from your mistakes.

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Perhaps most importantly, she knows that many see her as a role model and that this brings a huge deal of responsibility. “I’m human, I’m not perfect. I make mistakes all the time, but I guess my job is to keep those mistakes to myself, which I’m already fine doing and just try to be the best I can be for those kids,” she told E! Online.

READ: “13 Reasons Why” Does Much More Than Glorify Suicide, Selena Gomez Explained

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