Culture

From Rodent Hair To Poop, The FDA Legally Allows Factories To Have A Small Amount Of These In Your Food

If this is the first you’re hearing of this, you might want to just plan on skipping your next meal. The United States Food and Drug Administration (FDA) sets a legal minimum for the amount of “food defects” a consumer can reasonably come to expect from their food purchases. Growing up Latino, the bulk of your food probably came from Costco, where every apple is encased in plastic and the food feels pretty sterile. Never have we found a bug in anything from the holy grail of Costco.

No matter where you do your grocery shopping, often, you can’t even see the rodent hairs or disembodied insects in your food. But the FDA knows it’s there, and the agency is trying to keep your cafecito at a minimum of just 10 mg of animal poop per pound.

Along with a small dose of mierda, you’re also looking at 4% to 6% of your coffee beans being moldy or insect-infested.

@thetakeout / Twitter

Talk about a witches’ brew. Your cafecito brew in the morning is basically the same potion our ancestors made for their enemies. Café Mierda, que rico. It makes sense though. Coffee is grown in the humid, tropical countries of much of our people. That mold creates mycotoxins which are toxic chemicals, the most common of which in coffee is a powerful carcinogen. The second most common mycotoxin found in coffee is Ochratochin A, which can deplete dopamine and cause cell death in your brain. Some say that we’re exposed to small amounts of toxins no matter what we do, but others suggest listening to your body. We all react differently to different stimuli.

Worse still is that there might be up to an eyedropper full of blood and pus in that leche.

@SnellKat / Twitter

Cows that are used for dairy are kept forcibly impregnated their whole lives so that they can produce milk. Once they begin the very natural process of lactation, their calves are sent away, and they’re hooked up to metal milking machines. The irritation from those machines causes mastitis, which is an infection of the udder. That means that those machines are milking infectious pus along with the milk. According to the USDA, 16.5% of cows used for their milk are suffering from mastitis.

This is so common that the FDA legally allows up to 750 million pus cells in every liter of milk. That’s about an eyedropper full of pus. Cafe sin leche, por favor.

Insects might not perk up your spices, but they’re there anyway.

@Canoopsy / Twitter

Paprika is allowed to be comprised of up to 20% mold. Let’s face it. Latinos are more comfortable with mold than your average Becky. We just slice that moldy part off the bread and make toast like it’s a no-brainer. For some reason, when we learn the government is allowing us to eat mold without our consent, it feels gross. If you’re not grossed out yet, you should know your typical spice jar of paprika is likely to have 225 tiny limbs or heads of dismembered insects, and over 30 rodent hairs.

This all makes sense if you try to reconnect to our food system.

@ChefDLewis / Twitter

Access to food on a daily basis looks like walking down illuminated, refrigerated grocery aisles, and choosing between plastic wrapped chicken breast, or plastic-wrapped Beyond burgers. Root vegetables like carrots are being misted every twenty minutes and look so clean and fresh. When we remember where, or who, all these products come from, it’s easier to imagine why insects may have hopped a ride from the farm to to your plate. Produce is of the earth, and harvest season may be the buggiest season of the year, depending on the crop.

That said, food safety specialist Ben Chapmen told CNN that he looks at insects in your food “as a yuck factor versus a risk factor. Insect parts are gross, but they don’t lead to foodborne illnesses.” More dangerous for human health is when plastic, stone or metal ends up in a food harvest, which is why processed food goes under x-rays and metal detectors.

You can control the amount of feces and rodent hair in your food when you buy as fresh food as possible.

@asolitarypagan / Twitter

Instead of using a can of corn, buy fresh corn on the cob. You might just see the insects crawling out of the cob as you start to peel the corn, and rinse away all the mierda you can. Technically, the FDA is more concerned with regulating the amount of insect larvae in your cans of sweet corn. That said, 5% of corn husks used for tamales are expected to be moldy and insect-infested. Careful with your fresh tortillas though, because the FDA allows an average of one whole insect per quarter cup of cornmeal. Is it racism? We can’t say.

WATCH: Singer Cuco Is Teaching Fans How To Make Authentic Enchiladas Verdes From His Abuelita

Culture

WATCH: Singer Cuco Is Teaching Fans How To Make Authentic Enchiladas Verdes From His Abuelita

Tasty / Facebook

Cuco may have become synonymous with dreamy Spanish indie bedroom pop, but he can also make some mean enchiladas verdes just like his abuelita used to make. In a recent recipe video by Tasty, Cuco explains how he got his name. “Cuco came from my mom saying I was crazy, like “coocoo,” cause I was a goofy kid. My grandparents speak Spanish, so they would say I was el Cuco,” he tells Tasty. The 21-year-old singer wanted to show us how to make proper enchiladas verdes because it’s the food he grew up eating, thanks to his mom, and has become one of his favorite dishes.

Here’s Cuco’s recipe, and all the other Mexicanos telling him that their abuela makes it different.

Start with fresh tomatillos, serrano peppers, and garlic.

CREDIT: TASTY / FACEBOOK

I repeat. Cuco does not buy canned or jarred enchilada verde salsa. He makes them like a true abuela.

“If you want your salsa to be spicy, you can up the number of serrano peppers. If you like it more mild, I recommend using maybe like one or just like half a serrano pepper. You can also remove the seeds,” Cuco advises his Tasty viewers. “I personally like spicy, so I put serrano peppers to make it hot.”

Cuco isn’t about seedless salsa verde, y’all. He also reveals that he knows more than just how to make good enchilada verde salsa. He knows the why of it all.

“The reason we boil the tomatoes, onions, garlic, and the serrano peppers, is because we want to maintain the green color. If we were to roast the ingredients, we’d get more of a browner salsa,” he says in the video, casually blowing our uneducated minds.

After boiling everything to your liking, you just blend it all up in a blender, adding water until it becomes the consistency you want in a good enchilada salsa. Then, add the mixture to a pan and saute to bring out the flavors even more. Voila! You’ve made salsa verde. Now, add a thin layer at the bottom of your baking dish.

Don’t be lazy. Fry your tortillas for Cuco-approved enchiladas.

CREDIT: TASTY / FACEBOOK

“It’s definitely worth taking extra time to fry tortillas. A crispier tortilla is more likely to hold its shape while baking and the enchiladas will be less mushy,” Cuco sagely offers like an abuelita would. “After you finish frying your tortillas, you’ll dip them in the remaining salsa. This will make them easier to roll and ensure they won’t dry out while baking,” he added, proving tradition runs deep in this indie artist.

Once you dip the fried tortillas in the salsa, you just to add shredded rotisserie chicken (or the vegan meat of your choice) to the center of the tortilla, and roll.

“We’re using rotisserie chicken here but this recipe is also good if you have any kind of leftover chicken you’re trying to get rid of,” Cuco says, reaching full hay-comida-en-la-casa status at the mention of leftovers.

After you’ve rolled the tortillas, you’ll want to take Cuco’s advice and “be sure to arrange them seam-side down” in the baking dish, so that “they’ll continue to hold its shape and filling during baking.” Top the enchiladas with the remaining salsa verde, and heap plenty of cheese on top. “I go crazy with the cheese. It’s just fire,” Cuco confesses to the outlet. Put it in the oven and broil for 3 minutes. Top off the cooked dish with cilantro and crema to help balance the spices of the salsa verde, and you’ve got yourself Cuco-approved enchiladas verdes.

Cuco thinks its “crucial” for people to try real Mexican food.

CREDIT: TASTY / FACEBOOK

“I think it’s just really crucial to go try Mexican food if you haven’t tried it before because it expands beyond tacos,” he urged Tasty fans. “Tacos are good but there’s a lot more really good dishes in the culture – enchiladas verdes, chilaquiles, tortas, pozole. There’s good food everywhere. It’s good to know where the good food spots are at in your city.” 

Cuco has proven to be a master of both English-language and Spanish-language indie pop music, often gifting us Latino-American Spanglish speakers the gift of Spanglish love songs. We’re even more in love with you, Cuco, given the way to our collective heart is good abuelita food. “I think food really connects people. Music and food are both like art,” Cuco himself said in the Tasty video. That makes Cuco a Renaissance Abuelo.

Watch the full video below.

Enchiladas Verdes Con Pollo As Made By Cuco

Watch as Cuco teaches us how to make his family's delicious enchiladas verdes, made easy with rotisserie chicken and homemade salsa. Follow Cuco on Instagram: http://instagram.com/cucopuffs

Posted by Tasty on Tuesday, November 26, 2019

READ: The Laziest Food Hacks In All Of The Land Would Send Your Abuela To The Chancla

15 Of The Most Tragic And Outrageous Fails From 2019

Entertainment

15 Of The Most Tragic And Outrageous Fails From 2019

When Swedish model Hilla Abrahamson spent her first moments of the year being drenched by a bottle of champagne:

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=525824791154393

She really took poppin’ bottles to the extreme.

When this little boy tried to place a couple of rogue water bottles back where they belonged . . . and then this happened:

credit: reddit user tw272727

He was just trying to be helpful!

When Space X’s Mk1 Starship failed its nitrogen pressure test:

https://i.gyazo.com/93a7ec56047fd30a9cf11bd0aedb29cb.gif

Credit: r/Piscator629 | Reddit

Just last month, SpaceX’s Starship Mk1 prototype suffered a major structural failure on its Boca Chica launchpad in South Texas. Looks like the Mk1 won’t make it to the moon (or Mars), after all.

The time someone stamped this on at least one $5 bill:

Yeah…that’s definitely not the White House. Although, let’s be real—even if it was, Trump barely even lives there. He owns a long list of properties, and until September of this year, he listed New York as his primary state of residence. Since then, his primary residence has been listed as Mar-a-Lago, Florida—not Washington, D.C.

When this person tried to get a pentagram tattoo, but ended up repping the Star of David:

Credit: r/iamtheundefined | Reddit

There’s nothing wrong with getting a Star of David tattoo, especially if it holds special meaning for someone. But if your aim was a pentagram . . . well, those symbols mean very different things. At least this person didn’t notice until someone broke the news to her.

Oh, and the time Ariana Grande got the kanji for “Japanese BBQ Grill”—later “Japanese BBQ Finger”—tattooed on her hand:

Poor Ari . . . it’s an honest mistake, and she’s definitely not the only person to get a badly translated tattoo. This whole ordeal was truly an epic saga for the internet, though. In case you missed it: Ariana Grande wanted to get a Japanese kanji tattoo to celebrate the release of her album Seven Rings. But when her tattoo was finished, it quickly became clear that it read “shichirin,” which means is a Japanese-style grill. Later, when she misinterpreted advice from her Japanese tutor and tried to edit the original tat, she ended up with ink that now means “Japanese BBQ finger.” Yikes.

When a street in Brooklyn was mysteriously covered in raw chicken, with no explanation:

BuzzFeed tried to investigate this bizarre occurrence, but still hasn’t come up with answers. Whether the chicken fell off a delivery truck or was placed there as experimental art . . . this was an undeniably epic fail.

When Joe Biden said he wasn’t ready to legalize marijuana, and Cory Booker responded like this:

Joe Biden’s stance on marijuana is seen as a problem by many reform advocates. Not only does the criminalization of marijuana put Black and Latino folks at a disproportionate risk of incarceration, but it can create difficulties for people who require the use of medicinal marijuana products. However, Cory Booker’s response, though it definitely drew laughs, apparently got him in trouble with his mom.

She allegedly responded like so:

“Did you really accuse the vice president of the United States of smoking marijuana on national TV? Did I raise you better than that?”

When this hamster was photographed “eating oats” and “not” engaging in illicit activities:

Credit: r/starrycub | Reddit

Suuuuure.

The time an audience member of RuPaul’s talk show won a ticket to see Paula Abdul in Vegas and reacted like this:

Maybe this woman was uncomfortable being in the spotlight. Either way, please note how Paula is clapping. Please also note how this woman just does not react. Hilarious.

When teens were doing the #KylieJennerChallenge to the horror of dermatologists everywhere:

In response to the #KylieJennerChallenge, dermatologists warned against its dangers. Turns out treating your lips this way can not only produce immediate bruising and swelling, but it can also damage the collagen in your lips and make them even less plump in the future.

When a large, mildly-poisonous snake escaped inside the Bronx zoo:

Did they ever find it? We don’t know.

When the fortune cookie factory forgot to hire a proofreader:

Credit: reddit user Mercury90210

When this Twitter user almost burned down her house on Thanksgiving:

She didn’t even get to calm down with a piece of pumpkin pie! Well, better to burn the dessert than your entire house.

When Trump tried to get away with abuse of power that may end up in impeachment (oops!):

CNN/ Twitter