Whether you go to church and read the bible every Sunday or not, let’s see how much you paid attention to everything your mom taught you about Catholic Saints. Flip the card to find out if you guessed the name of the Santo right.
Ah. Catholic guilt. It’s the thing that keeps you up at night after missing a phone call with your Abuela and submitting to your mom’s demands that you drag your feet to church with her on any given Sunday. No matter where you are in your life, whatever parts of your faith you’ve cast aside, it sticks with you like eucharist to your tongue. After all, catholic guilt is like living with your own personal nun who speaks truths and anxieties into your ear for the rest of your life. She asks if it’s real worth it to risk eternal hellfire for that one white lie or speeding in a neighborhood. Here are all of the times, Catholic guilt really got you.
The first time you start to think that sex before marriage might be caca?
And your Catholic school teachings snap your right back in for a few more years. Of course, through ought these years you experiment with a lot of “self-care” which you also feel guilty about. TBH you probably also used your virginity and ceasing to stop flicking the ol’ bean as a bartering chip for waiting to have sex too.
When it feels so wrong that it feels so good.
“We all know catholic guilt is why we are kinky mfs”. And you KNOW that all of those years of delayed gratification led to a world full of weird kinks and freaks that you might even feel a little guilty for being into now.
When the weather feels great but global warming.
“I know a lot of people are confused by the commingling emotions of “this weather feels so good,” and “we will pay for this and the earth is for sure dying,” so for those uninitiated I would like to say welcome to Catholic guilt” – @ohJuliatweets. You know global warming is a problem and yet, you can’t help but thank the stars for how warm it’s been this winter season.
It’s the thing that walks with you in life like that story of Jesus’s feet on the beach.
“When I was 22, I pretended the Nsync/Britney Spears cd I was buying at McDonalds drive-thru was for my 4 year old niece in the backseat becuz I was embarrassed. I still feel bad about that. Just in case anyone wonders what Catholic guilt feels like & how long it lasts. FOREVER!!”
And don’t get it twisted, Catholic guilt will be there with you through thick and thin.
Because it will come for you in the A.M.
It pops back at you when it’s time to eat.
So you never overindulge without feeling extremely guilty for it. In fact, you probably feel way worse after years of being told about all of the starving kids in Africa.
In downtown São Paulo, July 14th’s Sunday service didn’t go quite as planned. The Canção Nova Community sponsored a youth conference and invited a celebrity priest to serve the final mass. Brazil’s most famous padre, Father Marcelo Rossi, was giving a homily in front of 50,000 worshippers when a woman suddenly pushed him off stage. The 32-year-old woman’s name has not been released, and she was immediately arrested. The priest is known for being vehemently homophobic and misogynist and had reportedly told the crowd that fat women don’t go to heaven before being pushed off the stage.
A woman pushed a homophobic and misogynistic priest off stage on live national television.
Apparently, the woman was able to sneak past security and get on stage in the middle of his homily. In a few seconds flat, she excitedly shoved the elderly priest off the stage.
O Dia later reported that “She said that she wanted to come in to talk to him and that she was scared the moment she saw the security guards running after her. It’s her version, but anyone who sees the pictures sees that there is none of it [security guards running after her]. She says she got scared and pushed him at a time when she kind of freaked out, lost control, but she had no intention [of hurting him], she just wanted to talk to him.”
She could be seen smiling after the push, and immediately jumped off the stage.
Within a few minutes, the priest reportedly stood up and told the crowd, in Portuguese, that “the devil hates him” and “thanked Mary for deliverance.” There have been mixed reports about why she did it, along with mixed reactions.
The young audience watched in shock and then started to scream.
Minutes after the incident, the priest was back on stage to finish la misa. Almost immediately, President Jair Bolsonaro tweeted out his well wishes for Rossi, saying, “All our solidarity with Father Marcelo Rossi. God looks [over] Brazil.”
The woman told reporters Monday that what happened was “between [Rossi] and I.”
Her friends told police that she suffers from various mental disorders and that she was being chaperoned when she snuck away from the group. She told police that she has bipolar disorder. Rossi decided not to press charges given that he was protected by the Virgin Mary, and she was released that same night.
Brasileños everywhere were sharing their reactions–from horror to just pure laughter on social media.
Just so y’all know, Rossi is a Grammy-nominated “Latin singer,” and mega-producer of Christian music. He’s also a mega-homophobe. In 1998, he said, “A lot of ideas will change the day homosexuality is proven to be an illness.”
Given Rossi’s open, proud homophobia, some folks were applauding the woman’s actions.
Just five years ago, he shared misinformation to his millions of followers, saying, “Sex between man causes pain, if something causes pain, it can’t be a good thing.”
We don’t know who said it first, but The Internet estaba chismosando for days about this version of the story.
Unfortunately, the reason this rumor started spreading is rooted in body-shaming the mentally unwell woman, and mother of a 3-year-old. While feminist outlets clung to this story and ran, fortunately, Rossi has never said that.
Catholics started clapping back to the chismosas by pointing out the flaws in the story.
Every version of the story we found says the priest said, “las gordas no van al cielo,” which wouldn’t make any sense. Rossi wouldn’t be speaking Spanish on a national broadcast when the vast majority of Brasileños speak Portuguese. This just didn’t happen, basta.
Others who feel spiritually traumatized by the Church felt that Rossi deserved the push.
Of course, plenty of people from all sexualities, religious belief systems or none at all, came out as unable to condone assault of any kind. They argue that you can believe the Church needs to change to include equal opportunities for women, to stop hating on the LGBTQ+ community, and to stop supporting a culture of pedophilia, and also believe that assault is unacceptable.
The Church released a statement saying, “The priest is well.”
“He was attended by the medical staff at the event and presided over the celebration to the end.” Rossi himself said that he felt minor pain, but “that’s normal.” He didn’t break any bones, and will likely continue making religious pop and homophobic statements for a long, long time.