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Because Our Parents Can’t Say Bye To Their Kids, This Is How Embarrassingly Extra They Get When It’s Time To Go To College

By July 31, 2017 at 4:44 pm

Moving into your own dorm usually becomes another reason for Latino families to be absolutely extra…like with literally every other event in our lives. And because one does not simply just move into a dorm with Latino parents, expect tears. Lots of tears.

Before you even get to your dorm, your parents will come up with every reason why living in a dorm isn’t going to happen.

So, you’ll be grateful for even being allowed to go away to college, much less live in a dorm. It’s a miracle!

But after long arguments discussions and finally coming to the agreement that moving to a dorm will “help you study,” your family will help you prep – with lots of preventative measures.

CREDIT: Parks & Recreation/ NBC via Tumblr

Mom will school you on how to get your dorm impeccable…just like her house. Dad, on the other hand, will teach you all he knows about protecting yourself.

When you get your roommate assignment, mom and dad will need to know EVERY detail about them.

CREDIT: Jane The Virgin/ CW via Tumblr

Realize now that no roommate will ever be good enough for them.

Packing up your room will bring lots of tears.

CREDIT: New Girl/ FOX via PopSugar

Plus, lots of breaks to go down memory lane.

You won’t possibly leave to college without a going away party with the entire family.

CREDIT: Jane The Virgin/ CW via VH1

There’s always an excuse for a party, obvio. Even if you’re moving to a campus 20 minutes away from home, they’re going to act like they won’t see you for months.

When it’s time to leave, the whole family will go with you.

CREDIT: Little Miss Sunshine/ FOX via Tumblr

Plane or car, they work it out. Abuelita maybe even made the trek.

Once at your new home, dad does a full inspection to make sure it’s safe for you…

CREDIT: Jane The Virgin/ CW via Tumblr

I’m pretty sure the school took care of that.

…And mami looks for storage space because that’s clearly all that matters in a dorm.

CREDIT: Devious Maids/Lifetime via Tumblr

I mean, where would I put all the Fabuloso and mops??

They will make sure you know that home is way better than this tiny dorm room.

CREDIT: Glee/FOX

They have to leave you with enough guilt to last through the semester.

Mom will secretly arrange a little shrine with all your family photos and maybe a vela or two.

They’ll probably sneak a Bible somewhere in there.

They will be super friendly and embarrassing around your new roommate.

CREDIT: Modern Family/ ABC

…and immediately judge everything about them when they left.

Your parents will probably want to meet the RA face to face…

CREDIT: Selena/ Warner Bros.

…And then make a scene when they realize you live in a co-ed dorm. WHOOPS.

…And every other person on your floor, because they’re nosey.

CREDIT: Fresh Prince of Bel-Air via Tumblr

They might even get some gossip while they’re there!

You will have to literally kick out your family once you’re all moved in.

CREDIT: Giphy via Tumblr

ENOUGH!

But even though dorm life will be necessary, amazing and life-changing…

CREDIT: Giphy via Vevo

FREEDOM!

…you’ll be FaceTiming them constantly and missing them like crazy.

CREDIT: Modern Family/ ABC/ via Tumblr

Guess who’s the extra one now?! They always win.


READ: Here’s Why Latinos Get Extra Emotional During College Graduations

Were your parents super dramatic when you moved into your first dorm? Let us know!

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If You Are A Chismosa, You Definitely Know These 9 Stages Of Chisme

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If You Are A Chismosa, You Definitely Know These 9 Stages Of Chisme

urbazon | Getty Images
By Jorge Rodriguez-Jimenez August 6, 2017 at 10:14 pm

There is nothing in life than than gets you more excited than some well-timed, super juicy chisme. Doesn’t matter if you know the people involved or not, as soon as you catch wind of some hot gossip you turn full detective, spokesperson, and messenger (because you have to keep the crew informed). Social media has only made the chismosa in all of us more active because now you don’t even have to be in the same room to get the latest scoop.

Here are all the stages you go through with chisme from start to finish.

You kind of lose your sh*t when you first hear (or read) the latest chisme.

CREDIT: mitú

Like, OMG. Can you believe what Vanessa just said about Horacio? Time to get more details.

Once you know it’s even half legit, you find ways to creep into any conversation about either party involved.

CREDIT: mitú

Even if it means befriending someone that you had a major falling out with, you will find a way to get more of the story. You’re basically an investigator trying to gather all the facts before spreading the news with the squad.

Once you learn the juiciest details, the time comes to decide who you want to tell first.

CREDIT: mitú

You start by being selective and only telling that one person you trust, but soon enough your tías, friends, neighbors, tu peluquera María, even your dog starts to get all the deets and they are living for it.

Of course, you cover your bases with the “you didn’t hear from me” line.

CREDIT: mitú

Solid way to keep your name out of the drama because with all these chismosas in your life, you don’t know which one of them may accidentally slip your name when they retell the story.

You always have to act surprised when someone close to the situation opens up to you about the chisme.

CREDIT: mitú

Me: “OMG. When did this happen? That’s so crazy!” ?

One of your friends is bound to let slip that you are spreading the news but you are prepared with your defense.

CREDIT: mitú

And that defense is total denial. You didn’t say a thing, got it?

Finally, your Superbowl arrives. Sh*t is about to go down and you have to be there to witness the main event.

CREDIT: mitú

It has been simmering for mooonths and you are about to get the payoff. You’ve invested time, resources, and brain power to following this chisme so you have to see it to the end.

You, very stealthily, make your way over to the spot where it is all about to go down.

CREDIT: mitú

But who are you rooting for? What is going to happen? Will there be a fight? Is this the end of a friendship? Nerves are on end and you just can’t bear the anxiety as the journey comes to a close.

Once you are there, the only thing to do is to find a good, hidden spot, and get ready to watch it all unfold.

CREDIT: mitú

Let’s not forget. All of the people in your circle want to know what goes down so you take notes, pictures, videos, and you might even livestream it. Everyone deserves closure and this is the best way to get it.

We want to know…


READ: Non-Offensive Clapbacks To Family Chisme

Share this story with all of your friends by tapping that little share button below!

Tags: chisme, chismosa, Comedy
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