Culture

If You Are A Chismosa, You Definitely Know These 9 Stages Of Chisme

There is nothing in life than than gets you more excited than some well-timed, super juicy chisme. Doesn’t matter if you know the people involved or not, as soon as you catch wind of some hot gossip you turn full detective, spokesperson, and messenger (because you have to keep the crew informed). Social media has only made the chismosa in all of us more active because now you don’t even have to be in the same room to get the latest scoop.

Here are all the stages you go through with chisme from start to finish.

You kind of lose your sh*t when you first hear (or read) the latest chisme.

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Like, OMG. Can you believe what Vanessa just said about Horacio? Time to get more details.

Once you know it’s even half legit, you find ways to creep into any conversation about either party involved.

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Even if it means befriending someone that you had a major falling out with, you will find a way to get more of the story. You’re basically an investigator trying to gather all the facts before spreading the news with the squad.

Once you learn the juiciest details, the time comes to decide who you want to tell first.

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You start by being selective and only telling that one person you trust, but soon enough your tías, friends, neighbors, tu peluquera María, even your dog starts to get all the deets and they are living for it.

Of course, you cover your bases with the “you didn’t hear from me” line.

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Solid way to keep your name out of the drama because with all these chismosas in your life, you don’t know which one of them may accidentally slip your name when they retell the story.

You always have to act surprised when someone close to the situation opens up to you about the chisme.

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Me: “OMG. When did this happen? That’s so crazy!” ?

One of your friends is bound to let slip that you are spreading the news but you are prepared with your defense.

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And that defense is total denial. You didn’t say a thing, got it?

Finally, your Superbowl arrives. Sh*t is about to go down and you have to be there to witness the main event.

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It has been simmering for mooonths and you are about to get the payoff. You’ve invested time, resources, and brain power to following this chisme so you have to see it to the end.

You, very stealthily, make your way over to the spot where it is all about to go down.

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But who are you rooting for? What is going to happen? Will there be a fight? Is this the end of a friendship? Nerves are on end and you just can’t bear the anxiety as the journey comes to a close.

Once you are there, the only thing to do is to find a good, hidden spot, and get ready to watch it all unfold.

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Let’s not forget. All of the people in your circle want to know what goes down so you take notes, pictures, videos, and you might even livestream it. Everyone deserves closure and this is the best way to get it.

We want to know…


READ: Non-Offensive Clapbacks To Family Chisme

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Jenny Solares Is One IG Creator Everyone Needs To Follow

Culture

Jenny Solares Is One IG Creator Everyone Needs To Follow

A year in quarantine has led so many of us to doom scroll and get lost in social media. As a result, some people are getting more recognition and one person who should be getting your attention is Jenny Solares, or @es_jenny_solares on Instagram.

Jenny Solares is here with the relatable content we all want.

The Guatemalan content creator knows what the people want to see. How many times have you heard someone say that they like a woman who can eat? Well, as Jenny urges, prove it, y’all. Take your lady out and get her all of the food that she wants. Let’s go!

Now, that’s how you add salsa to someone’s food. If you didn’t already think this way when adding salsa to your tacos, you definitely will now. It’s just impossible not to.

We also love seeing her collaborating with Estefania Saavedra, a fellow Latina creator. A rising tide lifts all boats so we appreciate seeing these Latinas working together.

Solares is even creating brand new identities.

Cholas will forever have a place in our hearts. We know cholas. We love cholas. We are related to cholas. Solares’ creation of the glola is truly a work of art. Just because you’re a chola doesn’t mean you can’t love glitter and colors.

She’s even got some of the Covid humor in check.

There are going to be so many school assignments about this year in the coming years. Kids will be learning about the time the world stood still as we battled an out-of-control virus. It is going to be us having to tell the little ones about that time and it’s going to be rough. Get ready to reliving everything we have been dealing with for the last year.

On top of all of the comedy, Solares is ready to show her fans some real love for their support.

“Thank you all for letting me be me. Thank you for appreciating my silliness, my craziness, my songs, my dances, my imperfections,” Solares tells her fans in a year-end video. “Thank you for letting me be myself. This year was full of so much sadness, uncertainty, frustration, and, for a lot of people, loneliness. Thank you all for not letting me feel that loneliness.”

Thank you, Jenny. Your comedy has been a bright spot for so many during an incredibly hard and sad year.

READ: Instagram Fitness Gurus To Follow For Your 2021 Goals

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Get Your Jajas From These Netflix Specials To Ease Your Holiday Blues

Entertainment

Get Your Jajas From These Netflix Specials To Ease Your Holiday Blues

Nothing makes life a little better than some hearty jajajas. Whether you are alone with your fur baby or in the living room with your quaranteam, it’s good to laugh. Netflix is ready with some hilarious stand-up specials from Latino comedians.

Gabriel “Fluffy” Iglesias: “One Show Fits All”

Gabriel “Fluffy” Iglesias is back to keep us all rolling with laughter in his Netflix stand-up special. The comedian who has kept us laughing for years does not disappoint in “One Show Fits All.” The set is filled with celebrity impressions and jokes about the family and some at his own expense. His show will give you the nostalgic feels you didn’t know you needed will leaving you in stitches.

Tom Segura: “Ball Hog”

Tom Segura came to play in his Netflix stand-up special “Ball Hog.” Get ready for an uncomfortable ride through jokes about moms, dads, follow dreams, and everything in between. If you’re a parent, you’ll get his brutally honest take on parenting and protecting yoour children from anything bad by all means necessary.

Franco Escamilla: “Bienvenido al mundo”

Franco Escamilla is bringing observational humor to everyone willing to listen. If the trailer is an indicator for how funny the set is, you are in for a treat. There is something so relatable about Escamilla’s view of the world that is littered with funny moments in the most mundane tasks, like learning someone’s name.

George Lopez: “We’ll Do It For Half”

Love him or hate him, George Lopez really understands the Latino community. He knows how our families work. Not only are we a loving and united group when it comes to the outside world, we are savage with each other. Lopez’s “We’ll Do It For Half” takes you through the most incredible and wild understandings of latino families. Like, your non-Latino friends won’t understand this stand-up as deeply as your own family.

Tiffany Haddish: “They Ready”

Tiffany Haddish promised several women comics that she would help them if she made it, and she did. “They Ready” brings together a group of hilarious women comedians and gives them a chance to be seen by the Netflix audience. One of the women welcomed to the stage is Aida Rodriguez and she slays the audience. Her stories of her wild life are so funny that you will be left breathless. These women are hilarious so bundle up and get ready to laugh till it hurts.

Liss Pereira: “Reteniendo líquidos”

Liss Pereira is a Colombian comedian everyone should know about. Her take on relationships cuts deep and will educate all of you clueless men out there. Her biggest bit of wisdom is about how men and women approach relationships different. Men like to think they are the ones who are making the decision and weighing the option. That’s cute. Everyone knows that it is the woman who decides if a relationship is worth pursuing and she is not getting into one if she does not see a real future with you.

“Lugar de Mulher”

“Lugar De Mulher” is a giving Brazilian women comedians a chance to let their humor be shared with the world. You might have to turn on the subtitles to understand the Portuguese but it will be worth it. These mulheres cover all aspects of being a women in the kind of comedy that only Latin American women can.

“Zona Rosa”

Gey. Gay. Gay. “Zona Rosa” gives four LGBTQ+ comedians in Mexico their time to shine in the limelight as they tackle what is means to be queer in Mexico. The first season had four episodes and fans are waiting for the second season to drop. The comedians discuss everything from sex to drugs to learning about their own sexuality later in life. It is a wild roller coaster so buckle in and enjoy the ride.

READ: Here Are Some Latino Comedians To Brighten Up Your Instagram Feed With Some Good Jajas

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