Here Are Some Piece Of Feminist Clothing You Can Wear To This Year’s Christmas Gathering
Alright, fam, who is sick of dropping dough on a brand new outfit to wear to la sala on Noche Buena just to stuff yourself silly and fall asleep? Yeah, we are, too. Whether you grew up with Noche Buena ending in La Misa del Gallo (the only reason your fam cares how you look), or ending in a food coma, this is a new year.
Here’s the opportunity: whether you’re with your family or in your home church, we’re not wearing a prim and proper dress this year. We’re donating our money to Planned Parenthood, putting on a political tee, blazer and walk into that sala ready to smash the patriarchy.
THROWS SHADE IN SPANISH Tee | $24.99
Make sure that everyone in the family knows that you are ready to read them to filth. You won’t actually say anything becasue you are supposed to behave in front of everyone but this shirt will send a clear message.
Don’t Be Tee | $29
Maybe just a clear, succinct disclaimer to show the world how you expect navidad to go down this year. It’s what Jesus would wear.
Cry Baby Club Crop | $28
This tienda offers free custom prints to suit any gender pronoun need, so mijo, mija, mijx, wear this crop proud for yourself. You are a proud liberal and this will make fun of them saying you are so sensitive.
Gordita Hoops | $50
If you’re going to splurge on a dress for one night and one night only, might as well redirect your funds to something you’ll be proud to wear year long. Take back your tia’s punch line and wear that bopo in gold plated big ole hoops.
CHINGA LA DIETA Cap |$29.99
She comes in black, navy and pink, and she’ll support you all through the holidays. If you wear it close enough to your brain, it can become your mantra via osmosis. Tell the tías that and watch them gasp.
Impeach Trump — Unisex T-Shirt | $29.95
This is a ballsy one, especially if your MAGA, gun crazy primo is going to be in attendance, but you know what, eres poderosa. Let’s this be your response to everything they say.
Abolish ICE Mini Skirt | $27.80
Wondering how you’re going to dress up those tees?
We came here to make a political statement to all the primitos who didn’t vote this midterm and all the Trumpers. We have to start conversations with our families and stop posting the same stuff in our blue social media bubble.
Grrrl Power Detachable Embroidered Peter Pan Fake Collar | $32
You can wear this under any of the casual wear you see here and you’re instantly formal. Make sure all of the men in the family see that you are a strong, independent woman before the “¿y tu novio?” questions start.
Mejor Sola Enamel Pin| $10
Save your voice and point to this pin every time an abuelita, or new novia de su tio loco asks you about your boyfriend. Why don’t people get this already?
Gender is a Social Construct — Women’s Tanktop | $29.95
If you’re reading this, it’s because you’re mad about having to put on an absurd dress to sit in the living room. This pairs well with a blazer, mijas.
Yes I’m Still Bisexual LGBTQ Bi Pride Flag Tank Top | $25
This one is for that tía chismosa who is talking behind your back. This will let everyonein the room know exactly what time it is.
CALLADITAS NO MORE Tee | $24.99
It is true to say thaat 2018 has changed all of us. We have grown, gone through some serious stuff, and watched as our government tried to limit women’s access to health care. The days of being silent are done.
Sinnin’ Longsleeve Top | $30
Let’s stop pretending you’re not chismosando all over this place telling folks you’ve been lighting candles for my gay ways. Wear a bowtie with it for your formal sala wear.
Juicy Chisme Tee | $29
Claim your seat at the throne and expect long-reigning Reinas to be shooketh at your bold fashion choice. Tuck these into high waisted wide leg pants, wear those chains and get that bold lip color, honey, because that mouth is drippin’ with freshly pressed gossip.
Naughty Prima Tee | $25
Everyone knows that you were a maldita cuando era niña, and even though you’ve grown out of it, nobody will let you live it down. You have two options: claim the title as your own or go for the “Nice prima” option to rebrand yourself. Own it.
Don’t Tell Me To Smile (Werewolf) — Sweatshirt | $44.95
Since I last saw you, #MeToo happened. I took off my people-pleasing mask and burned it. This is what you get now.
Feminist A-Line Dress | $45.48
If you’re absolutely going to be forced to wear un vestido, this is the one. Your mami can’t be mad at you.
Coat Hanger Earrings | $7.99
So you wore a political tee to dinner last year and it caused an uproar that ended with you swearing not to do it again. Good thing there are now subtle choices to get your point across.
Boob Earrings | $30
Living deep under the authoritarian oppression that is very Catholic parents? Let these “clay tit” earrings be a tiny symbol of authenticity. Wear them to misa proud, because you’re a bopo mofo.
Feminist Embroidered Brooch | $20
Sometimes, all we can do is suck it up, wear the dress and stick a pin in your revolutionary outfit debut for another year when you’ve had more autonomy from la familia. Paciencia, mija, your time will come.
BORICUAS | $24.99
Make it easier and cheaper on the familia and just get everyone these shirts. Yes, we Boricuas dress to the nines to stuff ourselves to death, be resurrected for flan, and carried out via Café Bustelo. Let’s make it a little easier this year.